Where did I go wrong with my hair?

[Shelley48]

Hi guys.

A a few months ago, I made the switch from SLS shampoos, to all natural oil based, sulfate free, silicone free etc shampoo and conditioners. I also cut out all commercial products that had cones and other things I couldn't pronounce in them. I wanted to go "all natural" in my hair care.

So I started using coconut oil. I don't remember the state of my hair when I first made the transition to all natural products, but I don't remember any complaints. Maybe it took awhile for me to notice chances?

well, now I definitely feel like my hair isn't the same anymore. My ends are always getting tangled and crunchy. Super dry. And my hair always looks flat and thin. I've always had thin hair but now it just looks scary thin... everyone around me says it looks normal so I could be overreacting. I'm also under a lot of stress, anxiety, and depression, so I am fully aware that my hair loss may be more than normal. My hair doesn't fall out dramatically in clumps, but sometimes there's a lot in the brush (and sometimes there isn't.) so I never know if it's normal, or if long hair just looks like more hair loss because it gets wrapped up in the brush...

I've read a lot about coconut oil just not working for people. I guess I've finally come to the sad realization that I can't use it... I can't even use half a pea size that's how thin my hair is... Makes me so sad having thin hair..

I'm going to try going back to silicones. I don't know what other hope I have.

My hair is also heat and dye free. I haven't used heat on my hair for 3 years now, I think. Last time I dyed my hair was like 13 years ago so that's all gone by now. I also don't have split ends. I take really good care of my hair in an OCD way. 9/10 times I go outside I have a scarf or satin bonnet on because I'm terrified of wind and the sun, even if it's braided.

So my hair seems to be "healthy" but just REALLY dry and thin. And that's so hard... how do you moisturize thin hair... I just get flat hair...

also I know my profile pic looks like I have nice hair, but I believe it's because it was all like pancaked out against my back. You can't see the density of it.

Also can stress make you go bald? I've never heard of that so I don't think so? What's the worst stress can do, just extra hair loss?


Thanks for reading if you read all this mess haha :)

[pailin]

'all natural' really isn't for everyone. Some people do fine with it, and others don't. If you didn't have any complaints with the condition of your hair before, why not try going back to the old routine and see if your hair is happier?
Also many people do have trouble with coconut oil. It made my ends crunchy. But you could still try other oils- I've used olive and sunflower; I just avoid coconut on my hair (it's fine for my skin).
Also, silicone free products can atill cause buildup problems from other ingredients.

[lillielil]

Hi guys.

A a few months ago, I made the switch from SLS shampoos, to all natural oil based, sulfate free, silicone free etc shampoo and conditioners. I also cut out all commercial products that had cones and other things I couldn't pronounce in them. I wanted to go "all natural" in my hair care.

So I started using coconut oil. I don't remember the state of my hair when I first made the transition to all natural products, but I don't remember any complaints. Maybe it took awhile for me to notice chances?

well, now I definitely feel like my hair isn't the same anymore. My ends are always getting tangled and crunchy. Super dry. And my hair always looks flat and thin. I've always had thin hair but now it just looks scary thin... everyone around me says it looks normal so I could be overreacting. I'm also under a lot of stress, anxiety, and depression, so I am fully aware that my hair loss may be more than normal. My hair doesn't fall out dramatically in clumps, but sometimes there's a lot in the brush (and sometimes there isn't.) so I never know if it's normal, or if long hair just looks like more hair loss because it gets wrapped up in the brush...

I've read a lot about coconut oil just not working for people. I guess I've finally come to the sad realization that I can't use it... I can't even use half a pea size that's how thin my hair is... Makes me so sad having thin hair..

I'm going to try going back to silicones. I don't know what other hope I have.

My hair is also heat and dye free. I haven't used heat on my hair for 3 years now, I think. Last time I dyed my hair was like 13 years ago so that's all gone by now. I also don't have split ends. I take really good care of my hair in an OCD way. 9/10 times I go outside I have a scarf or satin bonnet on because I'm terrified of wind and the sun, even if it's braided.

So my hair seems to be "healthy" but just REALLY dry and thin. And that's so hard... how do you moisturize thin hair... I just get flat hair...

also I know my profile pic looks like I have nice hair, but I believe it's because it was all like pancaked out against my back. You can't see the density of it.

Also can stress make you go bald? I've never heard of that so I don't think so? What's the worst stress can do, just extra hair loss?


Thanks for reading if you read all this mess haha :)

I can't really comment on the rest, but if we're talking about amounts of coconut oil, I scrape one finger along the solid oil and use what is under that one nail (I don't have long nails). That's more than enough. 1/2 a pea is actually quite a lot of oil!

Coconut oil isn't for everyone. Try a different oil - that might work if you don't want to use silicones. It sounds like you're taking great care of you hair but not enjoying it too much, so it might be about finding a balance. Good luck!

[Nadine <3]

Thin hair isn't so bad. I've got thin hair and I used to be mad about it, but really, it's sleek and shiny! And people with thin hair can do buns that people with the same length but thicker can't yet, so we have that going for us :)

When was the last time you clarified? Sulfate free shampoos are talked up all the time and glorified, but honestly I never feel like they get anything clean and I ALWAYS had build up with them. My hair was so tangly and flat and greasy but somehow dry at the same time it was insane. Try getting a clarifying shampoo and wash with it, twice. Really work the suds down all the way to the ends, and then use a deep conditioner. I bet that helps the tangling issues.

Also, not every head of hair likes coconut oil very much. I found it made my hair crunchy.

[mermaiden_hair]

At this point it can be anything. Did you clarified your hair before going natural? I know that curly websites dictate that you should do a clarifying treatment to get rid of any and all silicone and gunk of your hair to have a nice, clean slate to use your new natural hair products. Where do you live? It could also be the weather; maybe you live in a very dry, cold or super hot place. Did you use products with proteins in it? Remember that coconut oil binds every bit of protein that you feed into it. What I mean is, when somebody does a protein treatment and/or uses products with traces of proteins in them, it can be washed out with a shampoo or a clarifying treatment. But if you put coconut oil on it and not wash your hair out, you can suffer from protein overload, which makes your hair hard and crusty and eugh. :p

Sometimes, certain products or methods or so called "hair lifestyles" just won't work for you even if it works for most other people. If your hair was happy and healthy with traditional shampoos and conditioners, and liked the silicones, then maybe your hair just isn't cut out for the no-poo method.

[Anje]

Go back to what you were doing before. Sulfates won't kill you, and microbes can break them down fine. Get your hair clarified, condition it with whatever you were using before you tried all this, and see how it is. There's nothing wrong with experimenting, but it's better to try one thing at a time, rather than getting all new products -- then you can sort out what individual thing does or doesn't work for you.

Oh, if you're shedding a lot and it's getting thinner, you might want to get a doctor to run a few basic blood tests. Anemia and thyroid issues can cause hair to thin, and they can also cause a lot of low-energy depressive symptoms. Easy to check for too.

[Silverbrumby]

First get rid of the coconut oil. My hair feels the same way on it. If that doesn't fix the problem then clarify (or clarify shampoo anyway). If that doesn't work then maybe a good cone filled but light conditioner. I think it's VERY fixable. I've done a lot of experiments on the boards here which made my hair feel dreadful. But for the most part it was never permanent.



Hi guys.

A a few months ago, I made the switch from SLS shampoos, to all natural oil based, sulfate free, silicone free etc shampoo and conditioners. I also cut out all commercial products that had cones and other things I couldn't pronounce in them. I wanted to go "all natural" in my hair care.

So I started using coconut oil. I don't remember the state of my hair when I first made the transition to all natural products, but I don't remember any complaints. Maybe it took awhile for me to notice chances?

well, now I definitely feel like my hair isn't the same anymore. My ends are always getting tangled and crunchy. Super dry. And my hair always looks flat and thin. I've always had thin hair but now it just looks scary thin... everyone around me says it looks normal so I could be overreacting. I'm also under a lot of stress, anxiety, and depression, so I am fully aware that my hair loss may be more than normal. My hair doesn't fall out dramatically in clumps, but sometimes there's a lot in the brush (and sometimes there isn't.) so I never know if it's normal, or if long hair just looks like more hair loss because it gets wrapped up in the brush...

I've read a lot about coconut oil just not working for people. I guess I've finally come to the sad realization that I can't use it... I can't even use half a pea size that's how thin my hair is... Makes me so sad having thin hair..

I'm going to try going back to silicones. I don't know what other hope I have.

My hair is also heat and dye free. I haven't used heat on my hair for 3 years now, I think. Last time I dyed my hair was like 13 years ago so that's all gone by now. I also don't have split ends. I take really good care of my hair in an OCD way. 9/10 times I go outside I have a scarf or satin bonnet on because I'm terrified of wind and the sun, even if it's braided.

So my hair seems to be "healthy" but just REALLY dry and thin. And that's so hard... how do you moisturize thin hair... I just get flat hair...

also I know my profile pic looks like I have nice hair, but I believe it's because it was all like pancaked out against my back. You can't see the density of it.

Also can stress make you go bald? I've never heard of that so I don't think so? What's the worst stress can do, just extra hair loss?


Thanks for reading if you read all this mess haha :)

[Shelley48]

Oh yeah thanks guys, I forgot to mention I NEVER clarified, I think that was a huge part of the problem. I'm going to do that next time I wash my hair!

[Anje]

Oh yeah thanks guys, I forgot to mention I NEVER clarified, I think that was a huge part of the problem. I'm going to do that next time I wash my hair!
Sounds like a plan! Use a good sulfate shampoo and lather all the way down to the ends. I'll bet it'll be a lot better just following that. :)

[Shelley48]

Update: I clarified, used some cones, and my hair feels so much thicker! Still feels a bit dry, will that improve in time if I keep using silicone conditioners?

I'm so happy, thanks for all your comments!

[lapushka]

I always say it's about what your hair wants not about what we want for our hair!

I tried to go all natural as well. Tried CO-washing (bout of Seborrheic Dermatitis followed). Tried sulfate-free, same thing: SD. I just came to the realization that I needed harsh cleansers and after BSL I also started to need the slip that silicones gave me. It really is about doing what's best for your hair and if it is sulfates and silicones it needs and wants, just give it to it.

[AJNinami]

Update: I clarified, used some cones, and my hair feels so much thicker! Still feels a bit dry, will that improve in time if I keep using silicone conditioners?

I'm so happy, thanks for all your comments!

I would actually recommend doing something like an SMT after you clarify. That way your hair isn't dry underneath the cones (which can sometimes happen). Since you have thin (and I'm going to guess F/M) hair, you are more prone to buildup and over-oiling, so heavier oils will not be for you. Grapeseed oil is a very good light oil, and it smells just as good as coconut oil.

You might also want to look into the WCC (shampoo, cone-free conditioner, coney conditioner to seal). Good luck! :)

[nalgena]

I went natural for a while too, but it wasn't working for me. My hair was a tangled mess, no shine at all and just plain dull. Not to mention my scalp itched more than ever. So I went back to normal products and my hair looked much better immediately.

[Shelley48]

I would actually recommend doing something like an SMT after you clarify. That way your hair isn't dry underneath the cones (which can sometimes happen). Since you have thin (and I'm going to guess F/M) hair, you are more prone to buildup and over-oiling, so heavier oils will not be for you. Grapeseed oil is a very good light oil, and it smells just as good as coconut oil.

You might also want to look into the WCC (shampoo, cone-free conditioner, coney conditioner to seal). Good luck! :)

Ohh I never heard of that method before. So do I use a SLS shampoo? And then a cone free conditioner, I wash that out completely or add cone conditioner on top? Do you have experience with it? I'll have to research it! :) luckily we have many different shampoos and conditioners in my shower since I share it with my mom Lol

[Christine_O]

I tried all natural too, and my hair got icky, crunchy and dull and tangly. I went back to regular shampoo and conditioner, and used very light oils (sweet almond and jojoba) as an overnight leave-in every night for a month. My hair was much happier after that.

[Horrorpops]

I think the best part about hair experiments is they let you know what works for your hair. Some stuff just doesn't work for everyone - I tried sulphate and silicone free for 2 years and while I didn't hate it, my hair feels nicer with silicones (for example). I agree with PPs that maybe go back to your previous routine seeing as that worked for you before :o

Also in the future, I think its best to change one thing at a time. E.g. try using olive oil, keeping S&C the same. What way you can better determine what works for you and what doesn't. When everything is changed at once it is really hard to figure out what the problematic substance is :)

Also glad to hear clarifying and cones have made all the difference! :D I normally find my hair feels dry after a clarify as well. I usually mix up some conditioner, oil and honey and let that sit on my hair for a few hours as a deep conditioner and that helps a lot.

[spirals]

I've tried natural and I've tried sulfates. I found that conventional conditioner and soap for washing work for me. Do whatever your hair and scalp like. As Anje said, sulfates won't kill you. (I just don't like that they dry my hair, but I have no problem with them otherwise.)

[nakima]

I tried going natural as well and my hair did not like it at all! and I am one of those that coconut oil drys my ends out pretty bad. It loves olive oil tho :) I went through a very stressful period in my life as well and lost 50% of my hair and although I got some of it back its not as thick as it used to be. In order to stop stressing over the hair loss I had to keep telling myself my hair does not define who I am... It was really hard because I was not happy at all about my thinning hair either and the more I worried about the more I seemed to lose. So try to turn how you feel about it around as best you can. I know that others didn't seem to notice as much as I did but that didn't matter to me because I knew ha! But like I said once I accepted it and stopped stressing over it it turned around. I also clarified and started using biolage conditioning balm and that helped a lot with the dryness.Good luck Girl it sounds like things are already turning around for the better :)

[AJNinami]

Ohh I never heard of that method before. So do I use a SLS shampoo? And then a cone free conditioner, I wash that out completely or add cone conditioner on top? Do you have experience with it? I'll have to research it! :) luckily we have many different shampoos and conditioners in my shower since I share it with my mom Lol

I haven't tried it myself, personally, but it is on my list of things to try when I get through my other things I want to try first. lapushka can definitely give you more information, and has a link to the thread in her signature. :)

[Garnetgem]

I tried going silicone free and all that i stuck at it for about just over a year but result was dull hair that never really shined and i struggled with tangles too not to mention bad shedding which has eased since going back to silicone,coco nut oil i tried that as well but my hair was a matted mess of dry frizz and gave me major splits too so i decided to go back to silicone's and my hair has improved in the last 3 months of switching back to my old routine,i only ever comb a dot of olive oil the evening before a wash this seems to help make my hair softer its my way of helping it recover from the silicone free,one thing i forgot to mention was silicone free gave me a SD flare up something that had not really been a problem for a few years,now seeing this i see all mention clarifying and its something i have not done in a long time so will definitely do that now always learn more each time i visit LHC :)

as for where you went wrong with your hair i wouldn't say that you did its just going silicone free is not for everyone,as everyone has different results with going natural...

[Babyfine]

Sulfate free and Conditioner only did not work for me.
I now shampoo with SLES alternating with a good Sulfate free(Giovanni) every other day and my hair and scalp are much happier.
I also use silicones in moderation

[01]

All these chemical 'natural' and 'gentle' washing methods like 'natural' shampoos and CO washing actually made me more allergic than just diluting sls shampoo. So I can do really natural stuff and I'm fine, I don't get allergic (water only, washing with herbs, hennaing my hair) and I can dilute sls shampoo and I'm less fine but it's somewhat doable. But these sls free shampoos, gentle baby shampoos and conditioner only washing are a nightmare. Sls free 'natural' shampoos are chemical too, they're not natural, btw. As for coconut... I don't know for hair but it actually dried my skin. My skin and hair does fine with grapeseed oil.

[bjr]

Hi! So I also have fine hair and have had problems with tangles and crunchiness from natural products. I still love them, I just had to find the ones that worked for me. It sounds like you've found the answer to your hair problem, but if you ever want to try all natural again, here were the problems I fixed:
Hard water- dried out my hair like crazy. SLS products don't have a problem with it, but with natural soaps it can leave soap scum. A rinse with ACV or similar seems to work well
Coconut oil- by itself, it dries out my skin and hair like crazy. Combined with another oil like jojoba or sesame its amazing! I also really like avocado oil as a pre-poo. Its heavier like coconut but leaves my hair so soft :)

[Wusel]

I love silicones. Make life easier. My hair is sleek and shiny without them too but even sleeker and shinier with them, so, why not? :) And the only sulphate-free shampoo I like is the Pura D'Or now. I've tried other ones and they made my hair dull and tangly. I've mentioned my velcro-y hair months ago and now I know that the wrong sulphate free shampoo was the culprit.