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Wusel
March 13th, 2016, 03:24 AM
When I met my SO first time years ago my hair was short.
And I didn't care about it.
I didn't use conditioners or masks, I didn't put it up... It was just there...
And now I'm slowly but surely becoming a longhair-girl and later a very-long-hair-girl (In 2018, around Christmas, I'm hopefully classic...) with everything that comes with that...
I'd like to know how your men deal with your hair getting longer and longer over time...
Does/did it strain your relationship sometimes that you spend time on LHC, deep-condition your hair for hours, sleep with a silk-cap, braid and detangle it, wait till it's dry, take care of it, do S&D, avoid salons...
Do your men understand/accept/like your reasons why you want/have very long hair?
Did they get used to it over time? Or discovered the same kind of passion for your hair as you have someday and learned to love it?
I never had very long hair being in a relationship.
When it was waist, before the big chop, I was completely single for many, many years. That's why I ask you about your experiences...

Edit: And, of course, every other gender-relationship constellation and all LHC-men are cordially welcome! I'm interested in how partners think about LHC and growing hair out in every kind of relationship of every genders and transgenders! :) :flower:

Sarahlabyrinth
March 13th, 2016, 04:18 AM
My DH knew right from the start that I am growing my hair long and it didn't worry him in the slightest, he says he wouldn't mind even if I grew it to floor length and that whatever I want to do with my hair is fine by him. He tells me it's pretty, and he will remind me to put my sleep cap on if he thinks I have forgotten it. He thinks it looks cute on me. I wish he would play with my hair, and stroke it - I love having my hair stroked, but he doesn't. Perhaps I will have to educate him a little more :p

Wusel
March 13th, 2016, 04:21 AM
and he will remind me to put my sleep cap on if he thinks I have forgotten it. He thinks it looks cute on me.

This made me smile from ear to ear... :) Sweet... :)

Wusel
March 13th, 2016, 04:32 AM
Yesterday he spent HOURS in a huge shopping mall with me searching for a hair stick. Very uncomplaining :)

bunneh.
March 13th, 2016, 04:33 AM
He's definitely not fond of me wanting to grow my hair out but if we don't discuss it and I keep it out of the way all the time (hard with layers, they always pop out of braids and end on his face, i can understand why that annoys him) then all is well. I don't think it should strain a relationship, I'm on lhc in my free time when I have it and he does whatever he likes in his free time. I don't do masks very often and we don't live together yet but I think putting a towel over plastic bag or whatever else you use helps. I'm also not strictly sticking to my schedule, if something comes up and we're going out and I have oily hair, I wash it before going out instead of waiting for wash day (testing sulfate-free shampoo more thoroughly this month and so far I like it). I don't sleep with silk cap I think it looks horrible and might be too much trouble than it's worth (tight, uncomfortable, sliding off head), instead I braid it and sleep on silk pillowcase that I bring with myself every time I sleep at his place and he doesn't mind it. I braid my hair at night and that's good I think, it gets in his way less and protects my hair more. I comb my hair twice a day but it doesn't take that long, especially not when it's in protective hairstyles. I occasionally blow dry my scalp but honestly I don't think walking around with wet hair should bother him unless it gets splashed all over the place. I always cut my hair this is the first year I'm doing s&d and he doesn't mind that, his mum also cuts her own hair. He even cuts his hair once in a while so I don't think that bothers him.

Again we don't discuss my hair, it's mine, it concerns me, not him, so there's no reason to talk about it, it's not like when buying house or a car because you both have to agree with that since you'll both be using those things. I doubt he's ever going to get passionate over hair, hair is just hair. Ask him if he likes long or short hair out of curiosity but not much more than that. I don't think you have to go overboard to have long healthy hair (maybe some people might), unfortunately you will need to find out these borders on your own and set your own about what is still okay to do and what is too much.

Wusel
March 13th, 2016, 04:42 AM
He's definitely not fond of me wanting to grow my hair out but if we don't discuss it and I keep it out of the way all the time (hard with layers, they always pop out of braids and end on his face, i can understand why that annoys him) then all is well. I don't think it should strain a relationship, I'm on lhc in my free time when I have it and he does whatever he likes in his free time. I don't do masks very often and we don't live together yet but I think putting a towel over plastic bag or whatever else you use helps. I'm also not strictly sticking to my schedule, if something comes up and we're going out and I have oily hair, I wash it before going out instead of waiting for wash day (testing sulfate-free shampoo more thoroughly this month and so far I like it). I don't sleep with silk cap I think it looks horrible and might be too much trouble than it's worth (tight, uncomfortable, sliding off head), instead I braid it and sleep on silk pillowcase that I bring with myself every time I sleep at his place and he doesn't mind it. I braid my hair at night and that's good I think, it gets in his way less and protects my hair more. I comb my hair twice a day but it doesn't take that long, especially not when it's in protective hairstyles. I occasionally blow dry my scalp but honestly I don't think walking around with wet hair should bother him unless it gets splashed all over the place. I always cut my hair this is the first year I'm doing s&d and he doesn't mind that, his mum also cuts her own hair. He even cuts his hair once in a while so I don't think that bothers him.

Again we don't discuss my hair, it's mine, it concerns me, not him, so there's no reason to talk about it, it's not like when buying house or a car because you both have to agree with that since you'll both be using those things. I doubt he's ever going to get passionate over hair, hair is just hair. Ask him if he likes long or short hair out of curiosity but not much more than that. I don't think you have to go overboard to have long healthy hair (maybe some people might), unfortunately you will need to find out these borders on your own and set your own about what is still okay to do and what is too much.

Thank you for taking time to answer so detailed. :)
Sounds like you've found a good way to grow your hair out without disturbing your man with it. :)
It's a good example for me. I think, not discussing it too often is a good idea too. Most men don't like talking about makeup, handbags and hair :D

Kiiruna
March 13th, 2016, 04:42 AM
He doesn't really care. He knows it's my body and I do whatever I like with it, and I'll grow long hair whether he wants it or not :D

Wusel
March 13th, 2016, 04:45 AM
He doesn't really care. He knows it's my body and I do whatever I like with it, and I'll grow long hair whether he wants it or not :D

Great attitude! Not the man should decide how we wear our hair or which clothes we put on. It's our body and our decision. :)

Sweets
March 13th, 2016, 05:12 AM
I met mine when I had short hair - I had already decided to grow it out, and it was a long-ish pixie that I rocked the faux-hawk with. I was in the process of growing it out, and he noticed after a few months and kept bothering me about cutting my hair, going to the salon, etc. It was looking pretty awkward and we had just moved so I was job-searching, and I still liked my short hair, so I continued to cut it. I never noticed it when it got too long, but he sure did.

Finally, I got fed up after my last haircut, which I immediately regretted. I look great with short hair, but it's just not me. After years and years of short hair (ok, about 5) I'm reclaiming my identity by growing it out. Sweets has long hair, she always has, and she can't help that she met him when it was short...he's going to have to deal!

Having said that, I don't talk about it much. When I say something, he inserts his cringe-worthy opinion, like,"Go to the salon and get some highlights," "You should get a trim, they know what they are doing." etc. So I refrain from talking about it.

I get my own satisfaction when running my own hands through it, so I don't really care about someone else's opinion. Let's just call long hair a great shallow-filter of people, and time will tell!



He has been sweet with my "treatments." He calls my cowash "booty cream" which is short for "beauty cream."

Wusel
March 13th, 2016, 06:00 AM
Having said that, I don't talk about it much. When I say something, he inserts his cringe-worthy opinion, like,"Go to the salon and get some highlights," "You should get a trim, they know what they are doing." etc. So I refrain from talking about it.

That's why we talk so much about it here, right...? :)

Wildcat Diva
March 13th, 2016, 07:39 AM
@ OP question: "how does your SO deal with you wearing sleep cap?"

Here is how I handle it...
http://i1083.photobucket.com/albums/j386/janineevans/0532A99F-BA31-454A-B9D1-115D9E6C2153_zpspchbk0wm.png

neko_kawaii
March 13th, 2016, 08:34 AM
He doesn't see to think much about it. Occasionally he will notice that my collection of hair toys takes up considerably less space than his collectibles. He finds my sleep cap amusing and calls it the "You are going to sleep NOW?" Cap.

Chromis
March 13th, 2016, 08:37 AM
My hair had only regrown to about shoulder length when I first met my husband. It was pretty poufy and unmanageable because of my cowlicks, so we both think it looks better longer. He did lift an eyebrow when I first mentioned growing to terminal, but hair grows slowly, so he got used to it. One time I mentioned cutting it back a bit to thicken it up and he got an alarmed look thinking I meant to cut it all off, but he would never say what I should do with it. I likewise, do not tell him what to do with his.

He will help me henna or help even my trimming, but he is nervous to trim wrong. I also often trim his or do the neck pube clean-up. The few times I have manged to hurt a hand, he will braid it for me at night, but again, this is not an everyday thing. He teases me about the hair tumbleweeds that sometimes form in spite of my sweeping and cleaning, but we both know that would happen even if it were "normal" length.

I spend roughly the same amount of time online regardless of where I am hanging out and he too has on-line hangouts. Likewise we both have a budget and do not care what the other chooses to put their fun money towards. We both stick to the budget and pay the bills and savings first. He has his hobbies, I have mine.

Chromis
March 13th, 2016, 08:39 AM
He doesn't see to think much about it. Occasionally he will notice that my collection of hair toys takes up considerably less space than his collectibles. He finds my sleep cap amusing and calls it the "You are going to sleep NOW?" Cap.

Haha, yes mine does the same about my night braid some nights! Sometimes I will braid it well before bed so I don't have to do it later and that throws him off. :lol:

I don't use a sleep cap but he does rib me about the shower cap. All in fun though!

missrandie
March 13th, 2016, 08:49 AM
Mine has only mentioned a cut ONCE since I started growing mine out, and it was "your bangs are starting to get pretty long.. looks like it might be time to get them trimmed." Told him I was growing them out too, and he hasn't said anything since.

He is very happy that my pixie is growing out, and as long as it isn't in his mouth, under his elbows or body, or generally ON him, he is happy. Though he pets me sometimes.

At first, he laughed at my silk sleep cap and my silk pillow. Now he snuggles up to my head and tries to take my pillow :)

He even mentioned the other day "hey, look how long your hair is getting!"

Its a little past collarbone, but certainly much longer than a micro pixie!

Also, he finally saw me at maximum goofiness. I did an SMT in my hair with a plastic shower cap, then used my homemade microwaveable heat cap on top. It makes me look like a mushroom! He just chuckled and said, "you look silly."

Wusel
March 13th, 2016, 08:51 AM
@ OP question: "how does your SO deal with you wearing sleep cap?"

Here is how I handle it...
http://i1083.photobucket.com/albums/j386/janineevans/0532A99F-BA31-454A-B9D1-115D9E6C2153_zpspchbk0wm.png

ROFL!!! Can't stop laughing!!!


:rolling::rolling::rolling::bluebiggr:bluebiggr:bo unce::bounce::bounce::bounce:

I need a silk sleep bonnet...

browneyedsusan
March 13th, 2016, 09:01 AM
He doesn't care. He likes other body parts WAY more than my hair! :eyebrows:

FWIW: He wasn't fond of my pixies, but when it comes down to it, I do as I please. (See siggy. Yes, I kept it between 1" and 4" for at least 15 years. I don't remember exactly when I cut from SL to pixie, but think it was about when I had children. Quit getting haircuts when DD was a freshman in high school.)

lithostoic
March 13th, 2016, 09:04 AM
He couldn't give any less of a sh*t if he really really tried.

Wusel
March 13th, 2016, 09:15 AM
He is very happy that my pixie is growing out, and as long as it isn't in his mouth, under his elbows or body, or generally ON him, he is happy. Though he pets me sometimes.



:) My side braid isn't that long but it already gets in the way when we sit on the sofa and it's between our both shoulders or behind his shoulder or behind his nape... But as he sits/sleeps always on my left I've realized yesterday that it's surely better to make my side braid on my right side so it's out of the way. :D

Shelley48
March 13th, 2016, 09:20 AM
My boyfriend doesn't like my satin bonnet. He says I worry about my hair too much. During the winter, I would wear a hat and hide all my hair underneath. He didn't like that. Made me sad. He would make fun of me saying I look like a man with no hair. "I like girls with hair."

He told me I should stop worrying about my hair so much. And I agree because I get OCD with it. :)

Nadine <3
March 13th, 2016, 09:28 AM
My BF is more protective of my hair than I am. He loves my hair. He washes it and conditions it for me when we shower together. He likes to detangle it and put it into braids and at night when we snuggle on the couch he likes to rub my scalp. It feels divine. He always goes out of his way to compliment my hairstyle. He's really very sweet.

Wusel
March 13th, 2016, 09:42 AM
During the winter, I would wear a hat and hide all my hair underneath. He didn't like that. Made me sad. He would make fun of me saying I look like a man with no hair. "I like girls with hair."



So... when you wear a bun you look "like a man" too...? "With hair" means with hair down for him?

humble_knight
March 13th, 2016, 09:49 AM
Most men don't like talking about makeup, handbags and hair :D

LHC men are different to the norm :D I don't mind talking about make-up and hair with my partner :D

I'm the one who likes using LHC. She knows, but has no interest in using this forum. She has kneelength hair and likes it for herself, but feels no need to talk to other long-haired folk. When we are out and about, someone usually stops and compliments her hair - usually mums with their little daughters. I smile and feel happy she receives such attention because I know she struggled for many years with body-image issues. The best thing LHC did for my partner was to learn an updo she could manage for working in operating theatres. I showed her Pantha's YT channel and she learned one of her updos.

Wusel
March 13th, 2016, 09:56 AM
My BF is more protective of my hair than I am. He loves my hair. He washes it and conditions it for me when we shower together. He likes to detangle it and put it into braids and at night when we snuggle on the couch he likes to rub my scalp. It feels divine. He always goes out of his way to compliment my hairstyle. He's really very sweet.

Wow! :) That's sweet...

Wildcat Diva
March 13th, 2016, 10:05 AM
It's just become a way of life for us. My husband asks "so what's going on in 'the community'?"

He got Nightblooming oil for scalp for his birthday and gets "deep treatments" on his hair and beard. My husband and two sons started to grow their own hair out. One son is still short haired and says "hair is stupid. It serves no purpose. (He is twelve and so I ignore him.) I just bought hair and beard beads so they can have "Viking hair" for when they go to a metal concert (Amon Amarth) next month.

I practice braiding husband's hair while I drink mead out of my Ren Faire mug and we watch "Vikings."

I taught my oldest son techniques like not brushing his very wavy hair and not scrubbing hair with a towel.
I ask my son, "hey, my friends on LHC have a question I want to answer, can you help me make a video tutorial?"

Luckily we were already weird so it fit right in with our lifestyle.

EdG
March 13th, 2016, 10:05 AM
LHC men are different to the norm :D IThis is a good thing. ;)
Ed

Wusel
March 13th, 2016, 10:11 AM
It's just become a way of life for us. My husband asks "so what's going on in 'the community'?"

He got Nightblooming oil for scalp for his birthday and gets "deep treatments" on his hair and beard. My husband and two sons started to grow their own hair out. One son is still short haired and says "hair is stupid. It serves no purpose. (He is twelve and so I ignore him.) I just bought hair and beard beads so they can have "Viking hair" for when they go to a metal concert (Amon Amarth) next month.

I practice braiding husband's hair while I drink mead out of my Ren Faire mug and we watch "Vikings."

I taught my oldest son techniques like not brushing his very wavy hair and not scrubbing hair with a towel.
I ask my son, "hey, my friends on LHC have a question I want to answer, can you help me make a video tutorial?"

Luckily we were already weird so it fit right in with our lifestyle.

Sounds like you are a happy family :)

Wusel
March 13th, 2016, 10:13 AM
LHC men are different to the norm :D I don't mind talking about make-up and hair with my partner :D



:D I'm sure they are different :)

Arctic
March 13th, 2016, 10:21 AM
When I met my SO first time years ago my hair was short.
And I didn't care about it.
I didn't use conditioners or masks, I didn't put it up... It was just there...
And now I'm slowly but surely becoming a longhair-girl and later a very-long-hair-girl (In 2018, around Christmas, I'm hopefully classic...) with everything that comes with that...
I'd like to know how your men deal with your hair getting longer and longer over time...
Does/did it strain your relationship sometimes that you spend time on LHC, deep-condition your hair for hours, sleep with a silk-cap, braid and detangle it, wait till it's dry, take care of it, do S&D, avoid salons...
Do your men understand/accept/like your reasons why you want/have very long hair?
Did they get used to it over time? Or discovered the same kind of passion for your hair as you have someday and learned to love it?
I never had very long hair being in a relationship.
When it was waist, before the big chop, I was completely single for many, many years. That's why I ask you about your experiences...


I'm surprised that the thread is at page 3 and no-one has pointed out how heteronormative (and gendered, the latter was implicitly brought up already) the original post was. I do assume also that people who are part of other than "traditional" male-female couple (including other forms of relationships) are welcome to post too and that their experiences are valued.

***

My ex-fiance knew about my interest in hair and my participation at LHC, and I guess he got used to it and accepted it without much thought. In other words, it was a non-issue. He was not interested in hair, but did often listen to me, even though I am sure he found it all very boring.

Wusel
March 13th, 2016, 10:32 AM
I'm surprised that the thread is at page 3 and no-one has pointed out how heteronormative (and gendered, the latter was implicitly brought up already) the original post was. I do assume also that people who are part of other than "traditional" male-female couple (including other forms of relationships) are welcome to post too and that their experiences are valued.

***

My ex-fiance knew about my interest in hair and my participation at LHC, and I guess he got used to it and accepted it without much thought. In other words, it was a non-issue. He was not interested in hair, but did often listen to me, even though I am sure he found it all very boring.

Of course! Every other gender-constellation is cordially welcome :)
I didn't include other gender-relationship-constellations because I assume/hope that they have no such problems with that :) Maybe I'm wrong.
My friend David and his husband both have the same attitude towards hair, beauty and grooming, so...

EdG
March 13th, 2016, 10:39 AM
Just to clarify, my former girlfriend thought that my hair was too long. That was years before LHC. ;)
Ed

Arctic
March 13th, 2016, 10:40 AM
Of course! Every other gender-constellation is cordially welcome :)
I didn't include other gender-relationship-constellations because I assume/hope that they have no such problems with that :) Maybe I'm wrong.
My friend David and his husband both have the same attitude towards hair, beauty and grooming, so...

I am glad to hear. Maybe change few words in the OP so it would seem more inviting for all to post.

Seeshami
March 13th, 2016, 10:41 AM
Muffin calls y'all "The Long Hairs".

I ask Muffin regularly what he feels about the naughty mess and he says it's mine and to do what ever. The only time he ever said anything about my hair was when I cut it short short again he asked me to grow it back out because he liked it long better. He's never asked me to make it less long.

KittyBird
March 13th, 2016, 10:46 AM
My boyfriend doesn't seem to care that I'm on LHC. My hair was tbl+ when we met, and he doesn't notice much of a difference now that I keep it a bit shorter. I don't really do much with it though, never deep condition, I don't dye it anymore and I can't be bothered to wear my sleep cap. I sleep with my hair loose, draped over my pillow. He is slightly annoyed by my shed hairs getting everywhere, but it's not a big issue. I think it's hilarious when a freakishly long hair somehow manages to hide in his relatively short beard. :p

I'm not growing longer though, I'm currently maintaining at waist/hip, and I have actually started preparing DBF for the big chop I plan on doing in 2 years or so, when my natural colour gets long enough (shoulder/apl).

Wusel
March 13th, 2016, 10:47 AM
I am glad to hear. Maybe change few words in the OP so it would seem more inviting for all to post.

Done! :) Edited the OP. :)

chen bao jun
March 13th, 2016, 10:47 AM
He definitely doesn't want to hear about it at all. Very low tolerance for hair discussions.
He hates me wearing it up, which of course I have to do a lot for it to grow longer.
Other than that, he's good. When I first said I wanted to grow it long, he'd make cousin it jokes and when I said long like my granny and my aunts, he made faces (he didn't like their hairstyle--a bun). But we've come to a compromise where I wear it down and out when we go out. And the other day, we were in a room with a lot of ladies with short hair and he said, they would look younger if they grew their hair out as I am doing.
Of course my hair is only mid-back right now.
But he has started touching it and so forth. Which makes me happy. to put that into context, he's a black man, they've all had years and years of training that they can't touch women's hair EVER. (It might be a weave or wig or it might just have been straightened at great expense and the lady might be wanting the hairstyle to last for weeks, which it won't if its touched). My husband has a lot of sisters and they trained him so thoroughly that its literally taken me 40 years (33 of marriage and 7 of dating) to think that he might venture to touch my hair sometimes, though I'm always telling him that I'd like it if he would. My dad used to touch my hair and sing songs about it, I feel someone close to you is being affectionate when they touch your hair (though strangers, I could do without).

Arctic
March 13th, 2016, 10:49 AM
Done! :) Edited the OP. :)

Awesome, thanks! :thumbsup:

trolleypup
March 13th, 2016, 11:15 AM
Nope, SO has no problem with my long hair! :misskim:

andrea1982
March 13th, 2016, 11:22 AM
My husband really doesn't pay too much attention to my hair, and tends to not make comments about my appearance/ clothing choices in general. In the past when I've pressed him, he says he much prefers my hair long and without bangs. (to him, long is anything longer than about APL). For me, long hair is generally less fuss and bother than what I used to do, which was Cut and style four times a year, with highlights probably every other visit, wash and blow dry almost every day. This was much more expensive than my current habit of trimming hair at home and buying the occasional hair toy. He actually appreciates the craftsmanship of my wood hair toys especially, and he appreciates quality things that are built to last. He sometimes shows them off to people who come over. He used to hate me spending the money I used to spend on salon visits/ products/ cosmetics, but like me, sees hair toys as more of an investment. (that being said, i have a small collection and usually buy one to two pieces per year only).

Atarah
March 13th, 2016, 11:36 AM
My husband much prefers long hair; though his idea of long (waist+) is a good deal shorter than mine.
I spent about 16 years growing my hair to waist/hip then chopping to shoulder. Well, I met DH about two weeks after what I had figured was my last hair cut so it was just touching my shoulders. He was a bit disappointed when he saw a picture from when it was long. But he knew that it grows out and decided the then current shortness wasn't a deal-breaker to our relationship.

Now that I'm almost back to waist he loves to play with it and pet it. Even though he enjoys it down, he still compliments me when it's in a bun or braid.
My goal is knee (always wanted knee-length hair once it turns grey), but once I get there for a bit I'll probably cut it back to tailbone or classic as a compromise for him.

spidermom
March 13th, 2016, 11:47 AM
My husband doesn't care one way or the other. I recently got 4 inches cut off, and he hasn't even noticed.

Shelley48
March 13th, 2016, 11:59 AM
So... when you wear a bun you look "like a man" too...? "With hair" means with hair down for him?

By his logic, just when he can't see it. :(

TatsuOni
March 13th, 2016, 12:10 PM
He's very happy and his idea of a good braid lenght for me is classic:o He doesn't care about the crazy stuff I put it the hair or how much time I spend on my hair or here. He spends more time on his drums and drumsites than I do on my hair anyway:p If I on rare occasions have my hair loose he smiles happily.

Groovy Granny
March 13th, 2016, 12:15 PM
Mine goes with the flow ....of my hair :wink:

Initially he had commented about "not growing it too long" when I expressed that desire; I was @ chin when I started.
I was insecure about growing it out at my age and being mostly silver, so when I had grown it a bit and brought that remark up, he didn't recall saying it :shrug:

He is always patient with my LHC/hair chatter, and seems to appreciate the uniqueness and crafting of the Etsy toys I buy.

But I never hear comments from him unless I ask, and usually get an "it looks nice" reply .
He was never one to touch my hair...even when I was a long hair in the 60's and 90's.

If he has concerns about me growing beyond hip, he hasn't let on....then again, I have stated "this is it",and he probably is taking me at my word.
Though I also said I would grow only to MBL...then to waist :o
If by chance I do grow longer, I don't think he would protest; he realizes what it takes to keep my hair happy and well behaved, and knows I enjoy it.

My hair care doesn't affect him at all; he is usually busy on his own forums when I shampoo, trim, practice styles, or browse LHC.
I do a low/loose ponytail or braid that I flip over a satin pillowcase to sleep; a cap would make me nuts.
If I do resort to a high bun for bed in the Summer, he laughs....reminded of my '3 soup can sets' back in the 60's LOL

The bottom line is that I love my long hair, have fun with my toy collection and styles, and could care less what anyone thinks, though I am considerate of hubby.
If ever my beloved of 43+ years has an issue with my hair, we will compromise....though I really doubt that to be the case.

I have even mentioned my wishes in case of illness/death......no one is to cut my hair (or cut the very least necessary).
If I should pass and DD is not interested in my collection,I printed out a note kept with my hair toys for them to contact an LHC mod, pack it up and send it off to them so that the mods can PAY IT FORWARD to whoever has a need/interest.

sumidha
March 13th, 2016, 12:37 PM
He's generally supportive, but then he's also not the type to try and influence my appearance, so I don't think I would hear about it if he did mind.

I used to relay a lot curly specific advice to him from the forum (he's a curly), so he's also the only person offline who knows about LHC and will once in a while look over my shoulder when I comment out loud on a really nice braid or updo or something. I practice braids on him sometimes. He's got a bit of a competitive streak, so he's growing his hair out as well now- it was always between chin and shoulder length but now it's probably like BSL? I have to remind him sometimes that it's not a competition. :p

So I guess overall he gets a B+ for long hair supportiveness and tolerance... I'd bump it up to an A if he started buying me hairtoys, hint hint! :laugh:

mary*rose
March 13th, 2016, 12:44 PM
Groovy Granny, paying forward your whole toy collection to LHC? That is such a lovely sentiment.

chen I agree about showing love by touching someone else's hair. And that strangers touching it are creepy :shudder: That must have taken a lot work to get him to realize it's ok!

Mostly my SO complains about my hair shed, because it gets EVERYWHERE and I don't vacuum enough. Especially in the carpet :lol: I asked him to start using my Mane n Tail since I don't wash my hair anymore, but I think he prefers his products. I have a bottle of shampoo and two bottles of conditioner that I got as gifts because I didn't talk about my changing my hair care routine x(

When I had bad dandruff, he said he just got used to it. :( But I changed that.

He's confused by the "complicated" braids I do sometimes, even if it's just a fishtail.

Otherwise, I've got my hair obsession, and he's got his nerdy obsessions (not that I don't have my own nerdy obsessions...). Like right now haha. I'm on LHC, and he's watching YouTube videos of one League of Legends.

AJNinami
March 13th, 2016, 12:47 PM
I just asked my boyfriend yesterday what he thought was "too long" hair.. His answer saddened me a bit but I haven't told him how long I want my hair to be and I know he'll love me just the same. We had a conversation about leg hair a little bit ago along the same lines:

BF: "Your leg hair is getting long" *runs hand up and down prickly leg*
Me: "So is yours"
BF: "What would you do if I thought leg hair on girls was gross?"
Me: "Make you shave yours"
BF: "...I see your point"

He leaves what I do with my body alone now. He has mentioned to me before that he loves long hair (and he's constantly running his fingers through mine and begging for me to wear it down) so I'm not too worried.

JustPam
March 13th, 2016, 12:49 PM
Mine likes long hair, and has mentioned about TBL to be his favourite length. I am a casual grower with a simple routine, I don't use sleep caps or satin pillowcases, have no interest in hair toys and use minimal products. I think the only things that annoy him are all my clips and pins (he doesn't mind finding hairties, he'll just steal them) lying around all over the place haha!

Groovy Granny
March 13th, 2016, 12:50 PM
Groovy Granny, paying forward your whole toy collection to LHC? That is such a lovely sentiment.

My collection isn't very big or expensive, but it does have some unique pieces...as well as the basics, so I would hope it would go to good use ....at least for newbie collectors :cheer:

Carolyn
March 13th, 2016, 01:47 PM
In 38 years of marriage we have never discussed my hair. I don't know if he likes long or short hair. I assume he doesn't care. He's never washed my hair, combed or brushed it or braided. I don't know if he knows how to braid. I really don't want him "in my hair". It's mine. It's my hobby and obsession and I don't feel the need to share it with him just as I have no desire to share in his golfing or fishing. Recently I cut off 4" and then another 1" a week ago. He hasn't noticed and I never discussed my plans. One time I went from sitting on my ends to hip length and then to 3" above waist and he never noticed.

He has no idea what I do as far as conditioning treatments and the like. We don't share a bathroom so he has no idea what I have or what I do in there. We don't sleep together so he wouldn't know if I wore a sleep cap. I don't have one and don't want one.

If I ever said "LHC" or "long hair community" he wouldn't know what I was talking about. I don't talk about hair sites with him. I don't think he has any idea they exist. There have been a couple times when I was going to a meet that I had to explain where I knew the ladies I was meeting up with were from. I called LHC an on line women's health and beauty group. He can see that I am on line a lot but he's not interested in what sites I go to. I don't talk about it. We each have our own laptops and ipads so there is no way he would stumble on my browsing history or saved links.

To sum it up I have no desire to share any of this with him. I have you guys who understand and get the long hair thing. So it's all a total non issue at my house. Meh :shrug:

RainbowBowser
March 13th, 2016, 02:08 PM
I told my bf early on that I plan to grow my hair out, he doesn't mind at all.
The forum I barely mention but he knows I take this hair growth seriously (doesn't question my S&D)
He probably wouldn't like me wearing a sleep cap but I got silk/slippery pillow cases instead.

butter52
March 13th, 2016, 03:04 PM
The SO will just say how pretty I am no matter the lenght of my hair.

He would be in trouble otherwise...

Kake
March 13th, 2016, 03:55 PM
My husband likes my hair at pixie length. I last had it so short about 10 years ago. When I see old photos I do like it like that, but I grew it because I really couldn't be bothered with the daily hassle, and the monthly hairdresser visits. But my husband's opinion of my hair/clothes etc isn't important to me, he's just not good at stuff like that. His idea of a compliment is to tell me I look smart! Apart from the fact that's a rubbish compliment, I'm the most casual person on the planet. Strictly jeans and T-shirt. Being smart is not something I value.

I think that 10 years from now I'll think I looked good now, that's just the way of things, isn't it?

Wusel
March 13th, 2016, 04:01 PM
The SO will just say how pretty I am no matter the lenght of my hair.

He would be in trouble otherwise...

Of course... Mine too. In BIG trouble if he said that I look ugly with long hair... But I know this will never happen. :)

irodaryne
March 13th, 2016, 04:23 PM
I don't think my boyfriend minds too much. I know he's worried about my sheds getting wrapped around his uh... anatomy (it's already happening at shoulder length), and I know he's not super fond of more extreme lengths (I think floor length is just too darned long for him, but I also don't particularly want floor length), but he also appreciates that it's encouraging me to take much better care of my hair, and that is leeching into skin care, so I think he's overall okay with it.

Kendrix
March 13th, 2016, 04:47 PM
My boyfriend is always getting stuck in mine. It's nearing classic now and because I like to wear it loose when we have our couch computer time together, it tangles everywhere. I naturally yelp at any sort of pulling and he has learned to interpret my yips.

At night, he tends to roll up in my braid/loose hair and trap me, but again, he is good at disengaging when I vocalize discomfort.

He likes my long hair, but doesnot really think about something as too long other than whether I am inconvenienced by it. I always ask him if he likes a style j am wearing and sometimes ask him to pick my hair toy of the day for me. He likes the simpler looks and as a nerd, will pick anything fantasy, dice or dragon related.

I think he only has an opinion beyond "I like long hair" because I ask him to have an opinion.

Beatrixity
March 13th, 2016, 04:57 PM
My BDF lamented it so much when I got my hair cut to just above shoulder. I missed it a lot, but he missed it more. Needless to say he's very happy I'm growing it long. :D He's glad I've found LHC and have a supportive community to grow with.

goneJackal
March 13th, 2016, 05:56 PM
When I first started growing my hair, I had a buzzcut.
I had to start over after getting into university, and my then-girlfriend hated it. Really, really hated it.
When we broke up, one of the harsh things she said is that if she knew I was growing my hair out, she'd never get involved with me.
(the thing is: she did know, I never hid it - how could I?)

After that, the women I got out with mostly didn't care about my hair, or somewhat liked it.
It is a bit hard to find women that like long-haired men around here, unfortunately.

Recently, I met that ex-girlfriend and she even cumplimented my hair. http://www.felipesv.com/forum/k_lol.gif

purpleelephant
March 13th, 2016, 06:04 PM
My boyfriend is generally neutral about my hair length, unless we're cuddling or something in which case I have to put it up as to not strangle him. He's been mildly annoyed about my former bleaching, and S&D (he thinks it's an OCD habit). Otherwise, he's pretty much okay with anything.

maborosi
March 13th, 2016, 06:12 PM
I think he gets annoyed the longer it gets and the more difficult things can be. But he supports it, and finds it...endearing (maybe?) that I'm on a hair forum

hobbitlocks
March 13th, 2016, 07:10 PM
Even before I was actively growing my hair out, I was already particular about my hair. For years I kept my hair in between APL and BSL, getting regular trims so it was generally an inch past APL, I'd guess. My boyfriend and I had only been dating about 3 months when I got a terrible haircut. It's a story many people here have - I went in for a trim and BAM walked out about collar bone length. I was DEVASTATED. As in, I cried for 2 days straight. We had plans for lunch the next day and I was still so visibly upset. And while I'm sure he thought I was being totally absurd, he was really nice to me and patient about it. I knew he was a keeper! And he definitely knew I was very attached to my hair, so I don't think my growing it now came as that much of a surprise to him.

As far my current growth plans, I think he thinks it's a little weird, but it's just like if I had a hobby he wasn't into. As I learn new hairstyles he will comment on them (he was impressed by the crown braid!) and when I buy a new hair toy or product he'll let me gush over it to him. I think endearing is a good word for it. He seems to find my enjoyment of the forum entertaining. I've never been one for internet forums before and neither is he so it's kind of new territory. He will ask about "my hair forum" if I'm on my laptop when we're watching tv.

Now, I'm trying to get him to grow his hair out. I saw some pictures of him from college with ~chin length hair and he was SO handsome. He has really nice hair, very thick. He claims long hair is more work. He really does nothing to his hair now so occasional combing really would be more work, but I'm hoping to convince him it would be worth it!

RavennaNight
March 13th, 2016, 07:37 PM
DH has gotten used to it. He never really minded though, to begin with. He still isn't much of a fan of buns, and prefers it loose, but for work it is just so much easier to bun up. He's pretty used to hair experiments all over the house as well. The bowl of rice water sitting out, the henna releasing dye, the constant bringing home of hair products. He's been super supportive of me using herbs to dye my hair, etc, because he knows a lot of the conventional dyes are harsh. He is a willing participant in the occasional hair picture, although I really dislike bothering him for that.

dancingfrog
March 13th, 2016, 07:43 PM
DSO's hair was MBL and about 3 or 4 inches longer than mine when we met. Over our 22 years together he's maxed out at waist-ish and I'm almost there. He's just not into fashion, skincare, hair care, whatever, this just happens to be terminal length for him. I'm actively growing mine. DD16 is between waist and hip length.

DSO doesn't really care what I do or don't do with my hair. He's said so! I do ask if we are expecting anybody over before I do a SMT or something similarly silly-looking ...

My hair toys and creams and whatnots don't bother him, unless I leave them "out" for days. Fair enough! DSO doesn't really think before he speaks, so I do know that my silky hat that covers a bun looks like I am wearing underwear on my head. I wear it anyway :wigtongue What I really hear about is my wet shower cap dripping on the floor. (I hang it on the crank that opens the window. Maybe I should hang a hook in the shower ... )

All three of us shed like crazy, so we live with hair-gremlins and I have a rake-like thing I use before we vacuum! None of us can point a finger at the others on that one.

dancingfrog

lillielil
March 13th, 2016, 08:14 PM
This is not my most favorite topic, but I'm adding my $.02 anyway.

My wife has very negative associations with long hair, especially long hair of all one length. I'm trying to grow mine to something that I consider long (at BSL now, hope to get to at least hip, but who knows) and also trying to get rid of layers that I think do my thin hair no favors. The complaint seems to be twofold, both with very long hair in general and with my hair specifically because of its poor condition (ok, that's fair). That said, it is a topic that has come up exactly once. I have not mentioned LHC and don't really plan to, although it might come up because I signed up for the spring swap and may do some crafting at home. I'm not sure how my growing collection of hair toys hasn't come up, but I'm not going to push the issue. She seems to have no problem with some things like henna, which I started about 10 years ago and she ended up using for quite a while. I do not wear a sleep cap or use a silk/satin pillowcase. I also don't do any DTs other than the 10-minute in the shower type. I S&D at work while I'm on conference calls or "watching" webinars.

She very rarely says anything about a style, but when she does it is always positive, so maybe she doesn't dislike long hair as much as she thinks she does.

AspenSong
March 13th, 2016, 08:24 PM
When I met hubby, I had shorter hair - about shoulder length. Anytime before I started growing it out, when I'd cut it...he'd ask why I didn't let it grow and would mention liking longer hair. I told him the same thing I've ever told anyone....My hair, do what I want. lol.
He just sort of supports whatever I do with it. He likes it longer. He listens to me drone on about LHC and the peeps and going-ons and Etsy. I don't know...just kind of a part of life for us I guess. And even better, if I have the money...he totally encourages me getting hair toys and stuff. hehe.
He doesn't bat an eye at my sleep cap, or me walking around with some goo in my hair or veggie dye. His only complaint is the veggie dye getting EVERYWHERE in the bathroom.
He even tries to put me off trimming when I do it because he's always afraid I'll regret cutting anything off. :)

pailin
March 13th, 2016, 08:29 PM
He definitely doesn't want to hear about it at all. Very low tolerance for hair discussions.
He hates me wearing it up, which of course I have to do a lot for it to grow longer.
Other than that, he's good. When I first said I wanted to grow it long, he'd make cousin it jokes and when I said long like my granny and my aunts, he made faces (he didn't like their hairstyle--a bun). But we've come to a compromise where I wear it down and out when we go out. And the other day, we were in a room with a lot of ladies with short hair and he said, they would look younger if they grew their hair out as I am doing.
Of course my hair is only mid-back right now.
But he has started touching it and so forth. Which makes me happy. to put that into context, he's a black man, they've all had years and years of training that they can't touch women's hair EVER. (It might be a weave or wig or it might just have been straightened at great expense and the lady might be wanting the hairstyle to last for weeks, which it won't if its touched). My husband has a lot of sisters and they trained him so thoroughly that its literally taken me 40 years (33 of marriage and 7 of dating) to think that he might venture to touch my hair sometimes, though I'm always telling him that I'd like it if he would. My dad used to touch my hair and sing songs about it, I feel someone close to you is being affectionate when they touch your hair (though strangers, I could do without).

Chen, this was really interesting to me! I never realized that there would be such a prohibition on touching hair, although now that you've explained this, it really makes sense.

Deborah
March 13th, 2016, 08:42 PM
My hair has always been long and my husband likes it that way. It's a win/win.

turtlelover
March 13th, 2016, 09:48 PM
My hubby laughs about my "hair stash" and occasionally complains when my hair clogs drains, but he likes longer hair, so no real worries. I am not sure he'd like SUPER long hair, but I wouldn't ever go past tailbone anyhow w/ my hair type.

MermaidKatie
March 13th, 2016, 09:57 PM
My fiance loves my hair in whatever form it comes. It was short and very bright blonde when we met and he has seen it at every stage, including massively grown out brassy highlights, loads of damage ect. He knows I'm growing it long and is fully supportive of anything I want to do with it (including cutting it short again even though he really would prefer it long). Whenever I complain I don't know what to do with it, whether to colour my highlights close to natural, stay blonde, go dark, blah blah.. he always just tells me that whatever I do will look beautiful and he will love me the same, because he loves me for who I am not because of my hair. He really is amazingly sweet and melts my heart.:heartbeat:smooch::cloud9:

Wusel
March 14th, 2016, 06:32 AM
Awesome! I really didn't expect so many answers :)
My conclusion of all this, at this point, is, that, being with the average man (I mean not the very special and extremely rare one who likes braiding and combing and conditioning a woman's hair) it's probably more reasonable not to talk about it and by this kinda "growing in secret" give him the chance to get used to it and to slowly but surely adjust. (?) Because it's our body and WE decide what we do with it. NOT the partner. :)

lillielil
March 14th, 2016, 07:22 AM
Awesome! I really didn't expect so many answers :)
My conclusion of all this, at this point, is, that, being with the average man (I mean not the very special and extremely rare one who likes braiding and combing and conditioning a woman's hair) it's probably more reasonable not to talk about it and by this kinda "growing in secret" give him the chance to get used to it and to slowly but surely adjust. (?) Because it's our body and WE decide what we do with it. NOT the partner. :)

I think you are making this an unnecessarily gendered topic. I disagree with your characterization of "the average man" and would instead note that many of us have SOs who fall into the category of "not into hair as a hobby." That's versus LHC-ers as a group, who I think we can agree do enjoy hair as a hobby.

Wusel
March 14th, 2016, 07:51 AM
I think you are making this an unnecessarily gendered topic. I disagree with your characterization of "the average man" and would instead note that many of us have SOs who fall into the category of "not into hair as a hobby." That's versus LHC-ers as a group, who I think we can agree do enjoy hair as a hobby.

I'm sorry, I didn't want to characterize, gender or offend anyone... By "average" man I meant that from my own experience most men aren't interested in hair-topics... At least all the German and Polish men I know... I never met one who liked very long hair or had long hair or was interested in growing it out or liked talking about it... Maybe North Germany is different? It's just my own experience, that's why I asked here how to deal with it... I'm so sorry if it was a mistake and was misunderstood as an unfair predjudice against men. It wasn't meant like this. It's simply because I don't know men who care about hair. Not even one... unfortunately.
And I've NEVER seen a man with long hair here...

Caraid♫
March 14th, 2016, 08:01 AM
I'm sorry, I didn't want to characterize, gender or offend anyone... By "average" man I meant that from my own experience most men aren't interested in hair-topics... At least all the German and Polish men I know... I never met one who liked very long hair or had long hair or was interested in growing it out or liked talking about it... Maybe North Germany is different? It's just my own experience, that's why I asked here how to deal with it... I'm so sorry if it was a mistake and was misunderstood as an unfair predjudice against men. It wasn't meant like this. It's simply because I don't know men who care about hair. Not even one... unfortunately.
I think it's fair to make an observation based on what your own experience :)- the important thing is not to say something aplies to all men or woman (which I dont think you did!)
as for my s.o.- he never makes comments about appearances, maybe once in a while he'll tell me he likes the shirt I'm wearing or something. So he didn't care when my hair is long, and doesn't care now that it's short! I really enjoy that about him, I dont even have to give him a second thought when Im making an aesthetic choice (and that's how I think it should be!)

Mullsha
March 14th, 2016, 08:19 AM
When I first met my Boyfriend. I'd talk about wanting to grow my hair really long he usually would just shrug his shoulders not really care. Now that we got back together, in college, he is a little more enthusiastic about my hair. He told me recently he likes it down so there goes trying to keep it in a bun. xD The longer my hair gets the more interest he seems to be with it. ^-^ It's kinda funny he likes to tell me where has randomly found strands of my hair in his rooms and stuff. (My friends have also found my hair randomly in their house) they see it more as a part of me and not as a choice if that makes sense.

samanthaa
March 14th, 2016, 08:23 AM
I've told my boyfriend I want tailbone-length hair. He tells me my hair gets more beautiful with length, but sometimes I think he says this because he knows I think it's beautiful with length (I'm pretty sure he wouldn't care if I chopped to shoulder length). I don't think he would tell me to do something with my body just because he wanted it to be that way, which I admire about him. That said, it's hard to know his true opinion about anything because he'll always say I look beautiful (I tried to get his opinion about growing out my henna, for example, and I still don't know what he honestly thinks).

My hair is very low maintenance. When I stay a few nights at his, the only thing special I have to do is make sure there is conditioner in his shower for a co-wash. I usually don't need to wash my hair at his, but just in case, I've turned him on to shampoo bars so there's always one there for my using, if necessary. He HAS told me he likes when I wear my hair down as opposed to wearing it up, so I do try to wear it down in his presence (hence the co-washing at his--otherwise I'd just skip it and throw it up for the day). I have to be more careful about wearing it down, though, because he likes to walk with his arm around my shoulder (as opposed to holding hands) so my hair usually becomes a casualty :/ At night, I sleep with it braided or bunned, or sometimes (lately) just flung up over the pillow.

If we ever end up living together, which is a real possibility, by then I'm hoping I'll be done with henna. We have varying enough schedules that there will probably always be time when he's out of the house and I can do a quick deep treatment or S&D in solitude :) I don't think he could care any less when it comes to haircuts. Honestly, it takes me about 5 minutes to deploy Faye's self-trim method, and I'm sure I'll be able to convince him to give me a trim for a straighter hemline. He's always saying he wants to do it (I don't think he'd let me cut his hair, though!).

lillielil
March 14th, 2016, 08:25 AM
I'm sorry, I didn't want to characterize, gender or offend anyone... By "average" man I meant that from my own experience most men aren't interested in hair-topics... At least all the German and Polish men I know... I never met one who liked very long hair or had long hair or was interested in growing it out or liked talking about it... Maybe North Germany is different? It's just my own experience, that's why I asked here how to deal with it... I'm so sorry if it was a mistake and was misunderstood as an unfair predjudice against men. It wasn't meant like this. It's simply because I don't know men who care about hair. Not even one... unfortunately.
And I've NEVER seen a man with long hair here...

No offense taken here, but I thought I should go ahead note that I don't quite agree with your assessment of how the "average man" thinks/acts compared to how the "average woman" thinks/acts, which is how I interpreted your summary. I'm not trying to invalidate your experience at all!

When I lived in Germany I knew plenty of long-haired men... well, boys. And when I say long hair, I mean mullets because it was the late 80s. :rolling:

Wusel
March 14th, 2016, 08:26 AM
It's kinda funny he likes to tell me where has randomly found strands of my hair in his rooms and stuff.

Yes... My shed hair is spread all over his house too. Unavoidably lying everywhere... :)

Wusel
March 14th, 2016, 08:31 AM
I think it's fair to make an observation based on what your own experience :)- the important thing is not to say something aplies to all men or woman (which I dont think you did!)


Thank you. No... I really didn't mean it like this.

Wusel
March 14th, 2016, 08:37 AM
:D I remember the mullets... :D But they are gone... Now you really don't see any men here with long hair. The longest is where the crown hair is about 5-7 inches, down to the middle of the ear or so but longer... I've never seen any. Even young men/boys don't wear hair longer than this, I see the typical Beatles cut quite often, but with side-swept bangs. Seems like this is very fashionable among boys/young men here now.

lapushka
March 14th, 2016, 08:51 AM
I don't have a SO, but I have parents who care for me (literally & figuratively). They don't mind. My dad sometimes jokingly remarks he could snip a piece off if I wanted (thanks dad) :lol: but my mom just deals with it as best she can. I think she was also glad for the chop back to classic. It's easier for me, and it's way easier for her to deal with as well. But they love the updos, both of them, and the cute accessories (my mom mostly). :o

LadyLongLocks
March 14th, 2016, 09:46 AM
I met mine when my hair was close to knees. He was a long hair admirer so he was fine with long hair but now that its past floor he thinks it's too much! He is amazed that it reached 85" but it tapers a lot and we both are ready for a more manageable length.
He misses me wearing it down because I never do at this length.

mermaiden_hair
March 14th, 2016, 11:26 AM
DH and I met over the internet. My first photos of me sent to him was me with long hair, between bra strap length and mid back length, and he taught I looked very beautiful in general. He wanted to finally meet me one summer in 2013, and it will be our first face-to-face interaction, so I wanted to go to a salon and get a nice trim. Big mistake. They ended up chopping off way too much, and I ended up having chin-to-neck length hair. It looked nice at first, but then I really regretted it. He thought I looked very good with it, though. I grew it out and was happy again, but he has then kept pestering about our magical meeting and of when I had that short haircut.

I came to Ireland to reunite with him to be his spouse finally a few months ago, and I had a trim in the US before coming down, only enough to keep my long length. He complained that I don't look different, and so he let me go to the salon around here to cut it short. I regretted it all over again. I don't look and feel feminine and beautiful anymore, though he thinks otherwise. I wish he could let that 'magical first meeting' thing alone! It happened but now it's time to move on!

I think as long as I S&D, do my treatments, and use the correct tools to take care of my hair, I'm sure he will slowly warm up to the idea of me having long hair again. My mistakes in the past was not caring about even doing small trims, and I damaged my hair this way. Maybe he fears I'll be that lazy again. Well, lesson learned!

Anje
March 14th, 2016, 12:57 PM
My hair was maybe APL or BSL when I met my husband, and it got longer and shorter a few times early on. Eventually I grew it out a bit, was on LHC, and mentioned that I thought I'd try growing it to tailbone. He was worried, thought that would be "too long" and it'd look weird. But then it got to waist, then hip, then tailbone; he liked it more the longer it got. Every new length was better looking than before, according to him. Now it's maybe a smidge past classic, and he likes it a lot.

He also thinks my little hair obsession is "cute." He likes most of my interests and how I throw myself into them, really. We tend to drag each other into interests that way, and both of us have found some enjoyable interests and hobbies because the other got into them. He likes CO washing and used henndigo for years, thanks to LHC.

Wusel
March 14th, 2016, 01:03 PM
DH and I met over the internet. My first photos of me sent to him was me with long hair, between bra strap length and mid back length, and he taught I looked very beautiful in general. He wanted to finally meet me one summer in 2013, and it will be our first face-to-face interaction, so I wanted to go to a salon and get a nice trim. Big mistake. They ended up chopping off way too much, and I ended up having chin-to-neck length hair. It looked nice at first, but then I really regretted it. He thought I looked very good with it, though. I grew it out and was happy again, but he has then kept pestering about our magical meeting and of when I had that short haircut.

I came to Ireland to reunite with him to be his spouse finally a few months ago, and I had a trim in the US before coming down, only enough to keep my long length. He complained that I don't look different, and so he let me go to the salon around here to cut it short. I regretted it all over again. I don't look and feel feminine and beautiful anymore, though he thinks otherwise. I wish he could let that 'magical first meeting' thing alone! It happened but now it's time to move on!

I think as long as I S&D, do my treatments, and use the correct tools to take care of my hair, I'm sure he will slowly warm up to the idea of me having long hair again. My mistakes in the past was not caring about even doing small trims, and I damaged my hair this way. Maybe he fears I'll be that lazy again. Well, lesson learned!

When I met my SO for the first time, years ago, I had this ugly very aggressively layered toilet brush on my head you can see in my music videos, some of the older ones... And when we finally had our first date it was APL and all blunt cut at one length and while we were talking and drinking wine he came nearer to me and said: "I remember when I first met you years ago I thought, wow, she is very pretty. But I didn't know that you are SOOO DROP-DEAD beautiful!". Made me extremely happy that he didn't like the toilet brush more. It made me look kinda cute and funny. But not beautiful.

Persiangirl01
March 14th, 2016, 01:28 PM
My boyfriend has been so supportive on my journey. He thinks no length is too long, even if I want to grow to floor length, but for now my goal is just waist. He absolutely loves the idea of long hair, and I think he will he more upset than I would be if a hairdresser had to cut too much off :D If I have a night where I am too lazy to braid my hair before bed, he will encourage me to do it. And he always asks if I am still oiling my hair and taking my vitamins. He has been a great help on my journey! Including being so supportive when I had a big chop (waist to just past APL) because of my horrid split ends. He's even changed to sulphate free shampoos with me! :)

gregh
March 14th, 2016, 02:46 PM
My wife has generally been supportive. I told her I wanted to grow it out and she was alright with it though she gave me a hard time during the awkward stage. Her condition was I grow a beard as well and other than that she doesn't seem to mind, though she would be fine and maybe slightly prefer it if it were short. She rarely comments on it now, but she never commented on stuff like that before either, so its pretty much status quo with the exception that I have long hair.

Zesty
March 14th, 2016, 05:44 PM
DH is the best. When asked directly he just says that it tries to strangle him, but he takes my hair pictures very readily and doesn't laugh at the sleep bonnet or comment on my shower cap DTs. He also listens to me talk about the LHC and sometimes takes an interest, especially when I say I mentioned something about him. So I wouldn't say he "gets" it, but he's very supportive because he knows I like it.

Lucy Elizabeth
March 14th, 2016, 05:49 PM
Not really an SO (yet) but the guy I've been seeing for two weeks is always playing with my hair. When I told him how long I planned on growing it out he got really excited and happy :) When i mentioned getting it cut soon he started to freak out until I told him I was just trimming the dead ends off to which he replied, "okay, that's fine." LOL

He told me last night that when he was in the shower the pulled a really long blonde hair out of his beard (he has short dark hair as does is roommate) :eyebrows:
And when he gets it in his face (which is often) he just smiles and pushes it back, the first few times when I apologized he said he liked it and he could get used to it :o

SparrowWings
March 14th, 2016, 08:51 PM
Mine is pretty non-plussed by me not keeping it short, but he also accepts it as a fact of life. If I comment that it's being particularly unruly, he sometimes says I should "just cut it off" and then I wouldn't have to deal with it at all, but mostly it's either not discussed, or a running joke about "oh no, not the hair, you don't still have to get it ready before we go out, do you?!" Mind you, "getting it ready" typically takes all of 5 minutes (if that), so he knows he can't really complain too loudly. That, and he started balding in his early 20's, so he wouldn't even know what to do with a full head of hair anymore, much less long hair, so we'll have to forgive him for thinking it's too much effort this way!

Anya15
March 14th, 2016, 09:07 PM
I stared dating mine when I had APL hair. Grew it out a bit and cut it again to APL. Now it's BSL+ and I'm thinking of growing it to terminal. I think he's fine with it :) He says i look great regardless of my hair length. But, for some reason, he LOVES it when I bun my hair, which I can do only with long hair. :o

AJNinami
March 14th, 2016, 10:57 PM
It's simply because I don't know men who care about hair. Not even one... unfortunately.

I rue the day my brother gets a bad hair cut.

I've been working on my SO to grow his curls out. He seems to be warming up to it. ;)

LongCurlyTress
March 15th, 2016, 08:32 AM
My hubby loves my hair long, but more importantly, he loves me being so happy with my long hair. In 2011 I chopped the dyed. brassy, orangey aplish length off to a curly 3b chin length bob and he saw how depressed I got from doing this. Now he hides the scissors or puts them up in a top kitchen cupboard shelf that I can't reach so I don't impulsively cut bangs, layers etc. all previous hair cutting mistakes I have made. He helps me measure it monthly and gets frustrated when I want to measure before the month is up. He will brush my hair with a BBB if I ask him to, even if he is tired. And I got him going on coconut oiling his temple hairs where it is starting to recede. ;)

Recently he commented that he loves my hair in a half up. (He even knows what that is!! ;) with the remainder down and left to dry curly. I love this guy!! :p

Wusel
March 15th, 2016, 08:43 AM
I rue the day my brother gets a bad hair cut.

I've been working on my SO to grow his curls out. He seems to be warming up to it. ;)

My SO had 1/2" to 1" short hair when we had our first date. Now his crown hair is 3"-4" and he looks much, much better with this length. :)
And as I'm talented in cutting hair, I cut it since we're together.

Eastbound&Down
March 15th, 2016, 09:16 AM
I think he mainly doesn't care what I do with it, but I know for a fact that he doesn't want me to cut it any shorter than shoulder ever again. When we met, my hair had grown out into a bob and I was already growing it. I had the crazy idea last summer to cut it back into a pixie and he almost had a heart attack haha.

Wusel
March 15th, 2016, 10:19 AM
I think he mainly doesn't care what I do with it, but I know for a fact that he doesn't want me to cut it any shorter than shoulder ever again. When we met, my hair had grown out into a bob and I was already growing it. I had the crazy idea last summer to cut it back into a pixie and he almost had a heart attack haha.

I had this crazy pixie-idea 2 years ago when I had the toilet-brush-cut and hated it SO much! But so many people told me not to do it... I'm happy they did... :)

Nellon
March 15th, 2016, 11:19 AM
My "whatever-he-is" person had shorter hair when we met. I've now converted him into having a ponytail, using henndigo and taking better care of it (using conditioner and so on). Recently I convinced him to oil it with coconut oil before washing as well haha! Actually he's very happy since he loves long hair but didn't know how to care for it properly before and hence cut it short. People at work refer to him as "him with the ponytail" haha.

As for my hair yesterday I had washed it and it was drying and one of the last things he said, dreamily, before drifting off to sleep was: "Does your hair look really nice now?" meaning it was all clean and nice heh!

ETA: oh yeah and today he complimented my hairfork :) So yeah, he's all converted lol

Wusel
March 15th, 2016, 11:50 AM
My "whatever-he-is" person had shorter hair when we met. I've now converted him into having a ponytail, using henndigo and taking better care of it (using conditioner and so on). Recently I convinced him to oil it with coconut oil before washing as well haha! Actually he's very happy since he loves long hair but didn't know how to care for it properly before and hence cut it short. People at work refer to him as "him with the ponytail" haha.

As for my hair yesterday I had washed it and it was drying and one of the last things he said, dreamily, before drifting off to sleep was: "Does your hair look really nice now?" meaning it was all clean and nice heh!

ETA: oh yeah and today he complimented my hairfork :) So yeah, he's all converted lol

Great! He is really open-minded! Thumb up for him!

CreatureBailey
March 15th, 2016, 12:01 PM
I'm single... I'm just a kid eh. XD But like...I dunno my best friend is into hair growing too but he still doesn't have an account here. But like whenever I talk about this to my dad he just seems unresponsive... Like he's not like yaaaay i'm so proud of you he's like ._. Well I don't think he judges... but also some people judge me when I finger detangle...saying ''It makes me sad to see you do it cause it makes your hair all frizzy... :( '' and I'm like ''I don't need your pity, it's normal it does that, the cuticles open but they will close up after! >:( '' Like ugh. Some think they know better than me... when they actual are not hair growers and don't treat their own hair right... When I bring my Brewer's Yeast and stuff to my hometown they are like ''Ah, your pills again!''

I dunno sometimes it's a lonely journey...I can't go in the streets bragging about my ''passion''... I will just look like a weirdo.... plus my hair are hip length but not even that impressive...... I can definitly say it's a huge, huge, part of me...but I feel insecure expressing it...I feel alone and dumb....

Sorry XD But I feel like people will listen to me here :3

Wusel
March 15th, 2016, 12:13 PM
I'm single... I'm just a kid eh. XD But like...I dunno my best friend is into hair growing too but he still doesn't have an account here. But like whenever I talk about this to my dad he just seems unresponsive... Like he's not like yaaaay i'm so proud of you he's like ._. Well I don't think he judges... but also some people judge me when I finger detangle...saying ''It makes me sad to see you do it cause it makes your hair all frizzy... :( '' and I'm like ''I don't need your pity, it's normal it does that, the cuticles open but they will close up after! >:( '' Like ugh. Some think they know better than me... when they actual are not hair growers and don't treat their own hair right... When I bring my Brewer's Yeast and stuff to my hometown they are like ''Ah, your pills again!''

I dunno sometimes it's a lonely journey...I can't go in the streets bragging about my ''passion''... I will just look like a weirdo.... plus my hair are hip length but not even that impressive...... I can definitly say it's a huge, huge, part of me...but I feel insecure expressing it...I feel alone and dumb....

Sorry XD But I feel like people will listen to me here :3

Of course we listen! :flower::grouphug::sun::cheer:And I know exactly what you mean by "lonely journey". I spend a lot of time here - why? - because growing hair is my hobby, my passion and in my city I'm the ONLY ONE. And nobody besides my SO wants or tries to understand it. Everyone here is "in fashion" with a short or short-ish hairstyle and when I talk about my hair or say to someone that I'm happy that it's growing they look at me like... they think I'm completely cuckoo-pants... My SO is happy when I'm happy so he listens and helped me choose my hair sticks and is interested in hair loss home remedies and food that's good for hair but... he's the only one and as he loves me pretty much, he also loves all my craziness, but besides him, it's a very lonely journey for me, indeed...

CreatureBailey
March 15th, 2016, 12:32 PM
Of course we listen! :flower::grouphug::sun::cheer:And I know exactly what you mean by "lonely journey". I spend a lot of time here - why? - because growing hair is my hobby, my passion and in my city I'm the ONLY ONE. And nobody besides my SO wants or tries to understand it. Everyone here is "in fashion" with a short or short-ish hairstyle and when I talk about my hair or say to someone that I'm happy that it's growing they look at me like... they think I'm completely cuckoo-pants... My SO is happy when I'm happy so he listens and helped me choose my hair sticks and is interested in hair loss home remedies and food that's good for hair but... he's the only one and as he loves me pretty much, he also loves all my craziness, but besides him, it's a very lonely journey for me, indeed...

But here we all have each other. :3 I'm so glad. :') Like seriously I'm in school right now and my friends are looking at me weirdly for being here. -_- But then I turn to the page and I'm just like :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: :grouphug:

Wusel
March 15th, 2016, 12:35 PM
But here we all have each other. :3 I'm so glad. :') Like seriously I'm in school right now and my friends are looking at me weirdly for being here. -_- But then I turn to the page and I'm just like :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: :grouphug:

This made me smile from ear to ear :)
I'm a teacher and I would be really happy to see one of my students growing out hair and reading on LHC :) :flower:

browneyedsusan
March 15th, 2016, 06:24 PM
But here we all have each other. :3 I'm so glad. :') Like seriously I'm in school right now and my friends are looking at me weirdly for being here. -_- But then I turn to the page and I'm just like :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: :grouphug:

We're all here for you! :grouphug:
It can be really lonely. Growing from a teensy pixie took for freaking EVER!

FWIW: I work with a bunch of youngsters. The nearest one to my age--besides the owner--is 32! lol! The rest are younger. Some the same ages as my KIDS! (I'm the only one who is married, had children AND raised them to adulthood! lol!)

You're in good company here. We love our hair. :)

Alun
March 15th, 2016, 06:58 PM
I'm sorry, I didn't want to characterize, gender or offend anyone... By "average" man I meant that from my own experience most men aren't interested in hair-topics... At least all the German and Polish men I know... I never met one who liked very long hair or had long hair or was interested in growing it out or liked talking about it... Maybe North Germany is different? It's just my own experience, that's why I asked here how to deal with it... I'm so sorry if it was a mistake and was misunderstood as an unfair predjudice against men. It wasn't meant like this. It's simply because I don't know men who care about hair. Not even one... unfortunately.
And I've NEVER seen a man with long hair here...

A couple of other men already replied to your thread. Did you not notice that they were men? IME we are about 10% of the board, but less than that percentage of the comments. I suppose it's another stereotype to say that women talk more, LOL!

My wife also has long hair, but ironically doesn't really seem to like long haired men particularly. Also says I spend too much time online, but I don't think she cares whether it is on hair boards or elsewhere.

CreatureBailey
March 15th, 2016, 10:10 PM
This made me smile from ear to ear :)
I'm a teacher and I would be really happy to see one of my students growing out hair and reading on LHC :) :flower:

You're a teacher? o.o What do you teach? :)

CreatureBailey
March 15th, 2016, 10:15 PM
A couple of other men already replied to your thread. Did you not notice that they were men? IME we are about 10% of the board, but less than that percentage of the comments. I suppose it's another stereotype to say that women talk more, LOL!

My wife also has long hair, but ironically doesn't really seem to like long haired men particularly. Also says I spend too much time online, but I don't think she cares whether it is on hair boards or elsewhere.

Hewwo :3 My best friend is a guy and I wished he joined ahah. His username would maybe be CreatureGabriel as his hair's named Gabriel. Yes we gave names to our hair okay. XD I'm glad there's guys here, it's awesome! :3

CreatureBailey
March 15th, 2016, 10:15 PM
We're all here for you! :grouphug:
It can be really lonely. Growing from a teensy pixie took for freaking EVER!

FWIW: I work with a bunch of youngsters. The nearest one to my age--besides the owner--is 32! lol! The rest are younger. Some the same ages as my KIDS! (I'm the only one who is married, had children AND raised them to adulthood! lol!)

You're in good company here. We love our hair. :)

I know I'm in good company and I'm so grateful. :3 We're all like a big family. :3

Wusel
March 16th, 2016, 06:38 AM
A couple of other men already replied to your thread. Did you not notice that they were men? IME we are about 10% of the board, but less than that percentage of the comments. I suppose it's another stereotype to say that women talk more, LOL!

My wife also has long hair, but ironically doesn't really seem to like long haired men particularly. Also says I spend too much time online, but I don't think she cares whether it is on hair boards or elsewhere.

With "here" I meant here in my City, in North Germany, in my district... There are NO men with long hair HERE.
I know that LHC has a lot of male users, but for me, for where I live, It's not a reality so, as I already mentioned, I talk from the standpoint of my own experiences.
North Germany (or the extreme North, near the sea where I live) is quite brittle, distant, conventional, "upstage" and uniform when it comes to hair, clothes, shoes... and even as a woman I'm a dazzling personality with my long hair. I think it's different in the US.

maegalcarwen
March 16th, 2016, 07:09 AM
My SO has a beard, so it is actually really nice, he listens so carefully when I talk about oils :D I think he likes it getting longer, and when it gets in the way he gently swipes it away :)

It melted my heart how surprised he was when he saw my hair wet for the first time (my hair really curls up when it dries), and he went like " Omg, its so long, i think its at your waist when its wet! " :crush:

Wusel
March 16th, 2016, 07:30 AM
You're a teacher? o.o What do you teach? :)

Special Education. Meaning, I teach almost everything :)

Mirabele
March 16th, 2016, 07:30 AM
mine doesn't care much. he thinks i am too obsessed about that (he may be right). he thinks hair is something that just grows by itself if you want it too (mine really doesnt, i was at the same length without any trims for years befor LHC). he believes shampoo is shampoo and conditioner is conditioner, if it says so on a bottle. hairdressers know what they are doing. oils may be harmful and sticks and forks may damage hair. bbb brush is horse brush and argan oil smells like a horse.
i try not to tell much about these things, but it is hard not to, so some things do slip out. i do not expect him to understand fullly but a bit support could be nice. i try not to show my new hair toys because he wouldn't understand (well, i really have more than i need). i kind of concluded that hair topic is similar type as other girly things like nailpolish or perfume, he just not into that and that is ok for me. he does prefer my hair long, but i think that it means anything about APL is ok. i quess i just kind of would love that the day i am at waist, he would appreciate the effort i put into it, but most likely he will either think it is that how it was suppose to be or that i am "lucky to have" that long hair.

ErikaRenee
March 16th, 2016, 08:54 AM
My boyfriend is super supportive about it. I told him I wanted to grow mine out pretty long, and he was enthusiatic about it. But my goal (tailbone) is pretty short to most of you ladies; I'm not sure how he would feel about longer. Anyways, he works well with wood and has begun to pin wood hairsticks and forks on Pinterest for inspiration, so he can learn to make them for me once he gets back from deployment. He asks for pictures of my hair everyday actually, and he always compliments my buns and braids. He listens to me go on and on about it: I'm glad he cares.

SaucyWench
March 16th, 2016, 11:02 AM
When I met my SO first time years ago my hair was short.
And I didn't care about it.
I didn't use conditioners or masks, I didn't put it up... It was just there...
And now I'm slowly but surely becoming a longhair-girl and later a very-long-hair-girl (In 2018, around Christmas, I'm hopefully classic...) with everything that comes with that...
I'd like to know how your men deal with your hair getting longer and longer over time...
Does/did it strain your relationship sometimes that you spend time on LHC, deep-condition your hair for hours, sleep with a silk-cap, braid and detangle it, wait till it's dry, take care of it, do S&D, avoid salons...
Do your men understand/accept/like your reasons why you want/have very long hair?
Did they get used to it over time? Or discovered the same kind of passion for your hair as you have someday and learned to love it?
I never had very long hair being in a relationship.
When it was waist, before the big chop, I was completely single for many, many years. That's why I ask you about your experiences...

Edit: And, of course, every other gender-relationship constellation and all LHC-men are cordially welcome! I'm interested in how partners think about LHC and growing hair out in every kind of relationship of every genders and transgenders! :) :flower:

My hair was mid-thigh length when I met dh-to-be (he was a customer). My hair was what attracted him in the first place (happily, the rest attracted him, as well). He asked that I wear it down for our wedding. He's seen it grow to below-knee-length. He has trimmed it all our married life (20 years this next September!).

When I cut 26" off in December, he was fine with it. My hair is now waist-length and we both like it. I wear it down almost all the time (which pleases him a lot) and it is still a part of our romantic life...

As to: Does/did it strain your relationship sometimes that you spend time on LHC, deep-condition your hair for hours, sleep with a silk-cap, braid and detangle it, wait till it's dry, take care of it, do S&D, avoid salons...

Time on LHC is a few minutes here and there. I mean, it's fun but, I certainly don't spend hours here! That would be weird (in my opinion).

As for the mentioned hair-related care stuff, I have never done that. My hair has never been deep conditioned (much less for hours!) and I have never slept with it in any type of covering. I don't know what S&D means (but, I'm guessing it's also something hair-related I've not done). Waiting until it's dry has never been a biggie. If I didn't have the time to dry it normally, I used a blow dryer (and, I still do).

Braiding? Sure, but that hardly takes any big length of life-affecting time. Lucky me, my hair has never had a tangle problem (if it had, I probably would never have grown it long). Taking care of it entails washing and drying. Again, do big deal. Avoiding salons? So what? Saving money is never a bad thing! I've always thought long hair made caring for hair easier as no regular upkeep is necessary.

In any case, we are more than our hair. If long hair is the prime focus in a person's life and that focus outweighs any relationship(s) or other issues, then I think that person has a problem.

I know a gal that is considering not having chemo because she doesn't want to lose her shoulder-length hair! Her hair is more important to her than her life. That is just wrong...

Wusel
March 16th, 2016, 12:42 PM
My hair was mid-thigh length when I met dh-to-be (he was a customer). My hair was what attracted him in the first place (happily, the rest attracted him, as well). He asked that I wear it down for our wedding. He's seen it grow to below-knee-length. He has trimmed it all our married life (20 years this next September!).

When I cut 26" off in December, he was fine with it. My hair is now waist-length and we both like it. I wear it down almost all the time (which pleases him a lot) and it is still a part of our romantic life...

As to: Does/did it strain your relationship sometimes that you spend time on LHC, deep-condition your hair for hours, sleep with a silk-cap, braid and detangle it, wait till it's dry, take care of it, do S&D, avoid salons...

Time on LHC is a few minutes here and there. I mean, it's fun but, I certainly don't spend hours here! That would be weird (in my opinion).

As for the mentioned hair-related care stuff, I have never done that. My hair has never been deep conditioned (much less for hours!) and I have never slept with it in any type of covering. I don't know what S&D means (but, I'm guessing it's also something hair-related I've not done). Waiting until it's dry has never been a biggie. If I didn't have the time to dry it normally, I used a blow dryer (and, I still do).

Braiding? Sure, but that hardly takes any big length of life-affecting time. Lucky me, my hair has never had a tangle problem (if it had, I probably would never have grown it long). Taking care of it entails washing and drying. Again, do big deal. Avoiding salons? So what? Saving money is never a bad thing! I've always thought long hair made caring for hair easier as no regular upkeep is necessary.

In any case, we are more than our hair. If long hair is the prime focus in a person's life and that focus outweighs any relationship(s) or other issues, then I think that person has a problem.

I know a gal that is considering not having chemo because she doesn't want to lose her shoulder-length hair! Her hair is more important to her than her life. That is just wrong...

Sounds like you are quite easy-going with your hair... not obsessed like I was last year.
I won't ask, of course, but it's nice to hear that your hair is PART of your romantic life. For me it's sometimes more disturbing than part of it. For my romantic life I'd definitely prefer a pixie. :D But, as I never had that long hair being in a relationship I do my best to get used to it. And he does too. He knows now that hair can be ripped out by a metal watch band so he doesn't wear it when I'm around with hair down :)

Bubble_Curl
March 16th, 2016, 01:04 PM
With me also, my hair journey has become a fun part of our relationship. He happened to be a carpenter when I met him as his other job and, when he told me he did that, the first thing I thought of was hair forks. Because of course that's what I think of :p So I told him about hair forks and he was super sweet and cool about it instead of making fun of me... and the next time I was going into where he would be, I brought a few of my Jeterforks in to show him. This was before we had our first date. And apparently, he and his coworker called me Pippi Longstocking before I gave him my name because I had two long braids the first day I went in. When he saw how happily I talked about about my hair forks and just some of the things I said about why I liked them, I think he realized this was something valuable to me, lol. I also told him right around then with a giant smile on my face that some people have called my hair mermaid hair. Now mermaid hair is a running joke between us.

He likes to see me happy and get excited about things and he can see that my hair adventures are something that do that for me in a big way. I think that speaks to him in a unique way. He can tell how much I love it when he pets my hair and plays with it (which he said he didn't know how to do and I told him, again with a huge smile, that it just means we have to do much more of it for him to practice!). He also got me five Jeterforks for Christmas and two for Valentine's Day and got to see first hand how excited I got when he did that. We have both been having fun playfully enjoying those together (we have named most of them and I talk to him about which fork gets worn on each day... and he helped me pick out another one I wanted to buy myself).

I don't live with him so he doesn't see my hair treatments, though he knows I feel special and pampered and super happy doing them, lol, because I tell him all excitedly. But he has been a sweetheart calling me cute in my hot pink Adorabella Baby sleep cap... and let me put it on him! I have also started trying to steam my hair and was bummed when the steamer I ordered broke the day after it arrived... Sweetheart that he is, he offered to look at it to see if he can fix it and to also use his carpenter wood polish on my one Jeterfork that I thought was less shiny. LOL!

From what he tells me, he didn't know a thing about hair before. He wears his hair in a buzz cut but he has a beard. I make him a beard oil with coconut oil and honey instead of the coney stuff that he used to use. And I explained to him why the coney stuff was not good.

To kind of sum it all up... I think we can engage people in our passions and leisure activities. For me, the way I feel having my hair long and about my hair in general has carried over into how happy he sees me being. That the thing he responds to. He realized, from how I treated it and how I included him, that he can be a part of the joy of that process with me.

And my name here is inspired by him... Since I am gluten sensitive and just sensitive to a lot of things in general, he calls me bubble girl... lol.

sarahthegemini
March 16th, 2016, 01:16 PM
I can't believe you asked if it puts a strain on our relationship. I mean seriously, with all due respect, if hair puts a strain on your relationship, you should really re-think your priorities.

Wusel
March 16th, 2016, 03:15 PM
I can't believe you asked if it puts a strain on our relationship. I mean seriously, with all due respect, if hair puts a strain on your relationship, you should really re-think your priorities.

No need to be so unfriendly...
It doesn't put a strain on my relationship but, like some here mentioned, it can sometimes, to some extent. It's a justified question OMHO.

Wusel
March 16th, 2016, 03:20 PM
With me also, my hair journey has become a fun part of our relationship. He happened to be a carpenter when I met him as his other job and, when he told me he did that, the first thing I thought of was hair forks. Because of course that's what I think of :p So I told him about hair forks and he was super sweet and cool about it instead of making fun of me... and the next time I was going into where he would be, I brought a few of my Jeterforks in to show him. This was before we had our first date. And apparently, he and his coworker called me Pippi Longstocking before I gave him my name because I had two long braids the first day I went in. When he saw how happily I talked about about my hair forks and just some of the things I said about why I liked them, I think he realized this was something valuable to me, lol. I also told him right around then with a giant smile on my face that some people have called my hair mermaid hair. Now mermaid hair is a running joke between us.

He likes to see me happy and get excited about things and he can see that my hair adventures are something that do that for me in a big way. I think that speaks to him in a unique way. He can tell how much I love it when he pets my hair and plays with it (which he said he didn't know how to do and I told him, again with a huge smile, that it just means we have to do much more of it for him to practice!). He also got me five Jeterforks for Christmas and two for Valentine's Day and got to see first hand how excited I got when he did that. We have both been having fun playfully enjoying those together (we have named most of them and I talk to him about which fork gets worn on each day... and he helped me pick out another one I wanted to buy myself).

I don't live with him so he doesn't see my hair treatments, though he knows I feel special and pampered and super happy doing them, lol, because I tell him all excitedly. But he has been a sweetheart calling me cute in my hot pink Adorabella Baby sleep cap... and let me put it on him! I have also started trying to steam my hair and was bummed when the steamer I ordered broke the day after it arrived... Sweetheart that he is, he offered to look at it to see if he can fix it and to also use his carpenter wood polish on my one Jeterfork that I thought was less shiny. LOL!

From what he tells me, he didn't know a thing about hair before. He wears his hair in a buzz cut but he has a beard. I make him a beard oil with coconut oil and honey instead of the coney stuff that he used to use. And I explained to him why the coney stuff was not good.

To kind of sum it all up... I think we can engage people in our passions and leisure activities. For me, the way I feel having my hair long and about my hair in general has carried over into how happy he sees me being. That the thing he responds to. He realized, from how I treated it and how I included him, that he can be a part of the joy of that process with me.

And my name here is inspired by him... Since I am gluten sensitive and just sensitive to a lot of things in general, he calls me bubble girl... lol.

:) :) :) So cute... :) What a wonderful couple, you two. :)
I'm gluten sensitive too, and sensitive to a lot of other things too.

sarahthegemini
March 16th, 2016, 03:26 PM
No need to be so unfriendly...
It doesn't put a strain on my relationship but, like some here mentioned, it can sometimes, to some extent. It's a justified question OMHO.

Well I think it's absolutely bonkers. And I wasn't being unfriendly, just stating that I think it's absurd to have an obsession with hair so badly that it causes a strain. I mean, waiting for hair to dry, and doing a few treatments and styling it in a protective manner isn't (IMO) so time consuming that it would cause issues so in order to put strain on a relationship, one must take (hair ) things a little too seriously.

mary*rose
March 16th, 2016, 03:53 PM
I can't believe you asked if it puts a strain on our relationship. I mean seriously, with all due respect, if hair puts a strain on your relationship, you should really re-think your priorities.

Seriously. Like getting out of a relationship where something important to you isn't taken seriously by your partner.

Sarahm
March 16th, 2016, 04:03 PM
My ex-boyfriend had a love/hate relationship with my hair (BSL back then). On the one hand, he loved long hair. But on the other, it always got in the way when we kissed etc. Now it's almost WL, so I'm sure it would have annoyed the hell out of him if we were still together :p. The bright side of breaking up with him, I guess: total hair freedom.

SaucyWench
March 16th, 2016, 04:39 PM
Lovemaking and long hair can be combined, most delightfully....

georgia_peach
March 16th, 2016, 04:58 PM
DH loves all aspects of my obsession with long hair. However, he did take the time to show me how to clean hair out of the drain in the bathtub. ;)

Bubble_Curl
March 16th, 2016, 05:05 PM
:) :) :) So cute... :) What a wonderful couple, you two. :)
I'm gluten sensitive too, and sensitive to a lot of other things too.

Awwww, thank you <3 That's very sweet of you to say!

I was worried that all the sensitivities would put a strain on things or be intimidating to someone in dating... But, as with long hair, I have found that how I approach it (especially early on) helps to set the tone for how others approach it too. It has made it easier for people to be open to something that they don't initially understand or are joined in with if they see an open, upbeat attitude from someone who is fairly informed :D

That said, a mutuality is helpful as well. For example, I did not like beards at all initially and they are still not my favorite thing, far from it. But I have come to see how important in my BF's life his beard has been and seeing him use his beard oil from me and special beard comb gifts makes me smile even more. I still don't like beards much, but I like knowing that I can share something important to him with him that makes him smile a lot and feel good about in his life. I would say, though, that it is clear to me you are conscientious enough to handle this second part, the reciprocity element, just from the fact that you were caring and thoughtful enough of his/her future needs to have asked everyone's experiences :D

Elfa
March 16th, 2016, 05:06 PM
My boyfriend loves long hairs, also his own hair is long (now it's shoulder length, cause he likes to let it grow until waist or so, then cut it very short), so he is totally supportive with my long hair plan. And now that I cut a lot of my hair and we are on the same length, he said we are now in competition to see who makes it at waist first ahhahaha
So cute <3

Sarahm
March 16th, 2016, 05:08 PM
Lovemaking and long hair can be combined, most delightfully....

If they don't like pulling it, that is..

Elfa
March 16th, 2016, 07:21 PM
Lovemaking and long hair can be combined, most delightfully....


If they don't like pulling it, that is..

Lol so true!
It's like you can hear each of your little hairs suffering

lillielil
March 16th, 2016, 07:49 PM
Lol so true!
It's like you can hear each of your little hairs suffering

YMMV

Or so I've heard

pahbee
March 17th, 2016, 02:52 AM
I don't think my girlfriend really cares about my long hair, since it's my hair. She prefers short-to-medium since the cut can be more stylish. She'd be more hyped up about it if I decided to go for some outlandish cut. Her hair is short so she cuts it more often, and every time she gets it cut in a really cool way.

But my last visit to the salon was probably a year ago. XD

Sarahm
March 17th, 2016, 04:48 AM
Lol so true!
It's like you can hear each of your little hairs suffering

Yes, exactly!

SaucyWench
March 17th, 2016, 09:51 AM
If they don't like pulling it, that is..

A little pulling isn't bad.....

Wusel
March 17th, 2016, 10:37 AM
A little pulling isn't bad.....

When I was in kindergarden they almost suspended me because I bashed one of the bigger boys up because he pulled my braid...I still remember this in every particular. No... I'm absolutely not into that... DON'T even think about PULLing MY BRAID! :D :D :D :rolling: :rolling: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :silly:

mary*rose
March 17th, 2016, 10:41 AM
:lol: My hair always gets pulled in bed. And it's not just a little, either :laugh:

ESPECIALLY if it's in a braid.

Wusel
March 17th, 2016, 10:58 AM
:lol: My hair always gets pulled in bed. And it's not just a little, either :laugh:

ESPECIALLY if it's in a braid.

That's why I'm saving money for this: :D
http://www.lilysilk.com/de/seide-schlafmutze-nachthaube-elegant

mary*rose
March 17th, 2016, 11:03 AM
That's why I'm saving money for this: :D
http://www.lilysilk.com/de/seide-schlafmutze-nachthaube-elegant

Haha but you see, that's not half as sexy as a mussy braid tail is ;)

-arachne-
March 17th, 2016, 11:23 AM
This has been a fun thread to read...

My boyfriend isn't more attracted to long hair over short hair or anything, but he knows that I love my hair and goes out of his way to help me take care of it. He buys most of my products (he's found a few new ones for me over the years without prompting) and occasionally schedules trims for me when my ends are getting a little wonky. Not because he wants me to cut it, but because he knows I want it to look healthy and am too lazy myself. I've tried to get him to help me braid, and he did, once, but never again :p

sarahthegemini
March 17th, 2016, 11:23 AM
Awwww, thank you <3 That's very sweet of you to say!

I was worried that all the sensitivities would put a strain on things or be intimidating to someone in dating... But, as with long hair, I have found that how I approach it (especially early on) helps to set the tone for how others approach it too. It has made it easier for people to be open to something that they don't initially understand or are joined in with if they see an open, upbeat attitude from someone who is fairly informed :D

That said, a mutuality is helpful as well. For example, I did not like beards at all initially and they are still not my favorite thing, far from it. But I have come to see how important in my BF's life his beard has been and seeing him use his beard oil from me and special beard comb gifts makes me smile even more. I still don't like beards much, but I like knowing that I can share something important to him with him that makes him smile a lot and feel good about in his life. I would say, though, that it is clear to me you are conscientious enough to handle this second part, the reciprocity element, just from the fact that you were caring and thoughtful enough of his/her future needs to have asked everyone's experiences :D

I'm not a huge fan of beards either, although I do like stubble. I like being able to see my partner's entire face because he's just so cute! That said, he loves beards so of course I encourage him. His face lit up when I bought him beard oil, moustache wax and a beard comb :p

Wusel
March 17th, 2016, 11:28 AM
Haha but you see, that's not half as sexy as a mussy braid tail is ;)

Yes... When I showed him this he couldn't stop laughing for almost the whole evening and said: "When you wear THIS in bed, I'm out!" :bounce::bounce::bounce: :rolling: :rolling: :rolling: :D And... I absolutely understand him :D
But the model looks okay in it, don't you think?
Unfortunately I'm not the model. :D

mary*rose
March 17th, 2016, 11:34 AM
Haha no, the model still looks pretty un-sexy :lol:

Wusel
March 17th, 2016, 11:38 AM
He buys most of my products (he's found a few new ones for me over the years without prompting) and occasionally schedules trims for me when my ends are getting a little wonky.

That's supportive! :) Thumb up for him!

SaucyWench
March 17th, 2016, 11:40 AM
Since I cut my hair, I wear it down to sleep. Very sensual. I like it so much better. I used to sleep with it in a bun or braid, never liked either (big lump on my head, scratchy/itchy braid on my back. When naked, braided hair wasn't sensual for either of us. The bun made things cooler in the summer. But, nothing beats wearing it down for romance...

The nightcap? Well, I wear Victorian-style cotton nightgowns to bed. But, the mob cap would be just too much.

I showed it to dh and he said it would be fine, if the lights were out! Otherwise, nope.

Sknightlady
March 17th, 2016, 11:43 AM
So the only probably I have with hubby is that he enjoys pulling it. Unfortunately he can really wrap his hands up pretty close to my scalp I imagine it's not very good for my hair.

truepeacenik
March 17th, 2016, 11:55 AM
I just asked my boyfriend yesterday what he thought was "too long" hair.. His answer saddened me a bit but I haven't told him how long I want my hair to be and I know he'll love me just the same. We had a conversation about leg hair a little bit ago along the same lines:

BF: "Your leg hair is getting long" *runs hand up and down prickly leg*
Me: "So is yours"
BF: "What would you do if I thought leg hair on girls was gross?"
Me: "Make you shave yours"
BF: "...I see your point"

He leaves what I do with my body alone now. He has mentioned to me before that he loves long hair (and he's constantly running his fingers through mine and begging for me to wear it down) so I'm not too worried.

You are training him to see your point very well. :applause: But he definitely has a point about stubble. Let it all grow.

As for my various partners, I neither ask permission nor seek forgiveness. My body is my sovereign territory, and they are envoys from a different sovereign nation.
The current partner, a live in, has expressed a desire for me to wear my hair down, since he likes it.
Diplomacy ensued, with the Treaty of Bun settled with an agreement to wear hair down when feasible, and when we go out on a proper date. Concerts, he knows I will make the choice needed in the moment. Typically, bunned until it's time to dance and fly.

Funny aside, I did ask, conversationally, about longer hair. He opened this mouth while shoving a foot in there when he said, "well, I think hair past waist is really too long."
I pulled the hair stick, rolled my hair down and fluffed it to its past classic glory.

Him: Oh.....

Funny, all the jokes I heard as a kid suggested women had problems with spatial thinking.

To be fair, he's been on board with suggestions for his fine, thin, was at shoulder now mid-back hair.

Pat Wright
March 17th, 2016, 12:09 PM
He was disappointed that I had to cut off 1-2 inches the other day. After a bad mistake my hair is so damaged it actually needs more trimmed. He knows how hard I have been trying to grow out this mess.

truepeacenik
March 17th, 2016, 12:14 PM
So the only probably I have with hubby is that he enjoys pulling it. Unfortunately he can really wrap his hands up pretty close to my scalp I imagine it's not very good for my hair.
The tension is more the issue than how close to the scalp.
Is this serious hair pulling (sexyfuntime stuff) or just some weirdness of his?
And, importantly, do you enjoy it?

mary*rose
March 17th, 2016, 09:59 PM
Oh truepeacenik that post was too funny. I thoroughly enjoyed it - especially that bit about spatial thinking. That made me giggle.

Sknightlady
March 18th, 2016, 06:34 AM
It's sexy fun stuff. Most of the time I enjoy it. When I yelp like an abused puppy he knows he's pulled to hard

Wusel
March 19th, 2016, 05:00 PM
A quick update:
I've bought one.
This one:
http://www.amazon.de/Lilysilk-Schlafm%C3%BCtze-Nachtm%C3%BCtze-Kopfbedeckung-Nachtmutze/dp/B012ER5I8A/ref=sr_1_1?s=apparel&ie=UTF8&qid=1458428194&sr=1-1
I'm gonna wait till he's asleep and then put it on. :D :D :D
My hair needs it. Really. I toss and turn all night and even the silk pillow case isn't enough because my head doesn't stay on it all night. And my hair is frizzy in the morning.

Sarahm
March 19th, 2016, 05:12 PM
A quick update:
I've bought one.
This one:
http://www.amazon.de/Lilysilk-Schlafm%C3%BCtze-Nachtm%C3%BCtze-Kopfbedeckung-Nachtmutze/dp/B012ER5I8A/ref=sr_1_1?s=apparel&ie=UTF8&qid=1458428194&sr=1-1
I'm gonna wait till he's asleep and then put it on. :D :D :D
My hair needs it. Really. I toss and turn all night and even the silk pillow case isn't enough because my head doesn't stay on it all night. And my hair is frizzy in the morning.

And all of a sudden, a night cap doesn't sound like a silly idea anymore. I'm actually browsing for options on Amazon now too :p

Wusel
March 19th, 2016, 05:39 PM
And all of a sudden, a night cap doesn't sound like a silly idea anymore. I'm actually browsing for options on Amazon now too :p

I never had one too. I have no idea how it feels to sleep with something on my head but it's worth a try as so many folks here swear by it :)

TatsuOni
January 26th, 2024, 11:52 AM
He's very happy and his idea of a good braid lenght for me is classic:o He doesn't care about the crazy stuff I put it the hair or how much time I spend on my hair or here. He spends more time on his drums and drumsites than I do on my hair anyway:p If I on rare occasions have my hair loose he smiles happily.

This was eight years ago and I had totally forgotten about this :lol: My braid since long passed classic but he still likes the fact that I have long hair and the few times that I wear it loose. And he still play drums :lol:

Bat
January 26th, 2024, 10:12 PM
This was eight years ago and I had totally forgotten about this :lol: My braid since long passed classic but he still likes the fact that I have long hair and the few times that I wear it loose. And he still play drums :lol:

And you are still together so that's even more of a win

TatsuOni
January 27th, 2024, 01:31 AM
And you are still together so that's even more of a win

This year we'll have been together for 13 years.

Nefcerka
January 27th, 2024, 05:46 AM
My DH (being bald himself) finds it incomprehensible that I can talk about hair-related topics every single day and still have something new to say. He does not mind me telling him interesting facts about hair sometimes, but LHC is definitely an outlet I need for my hairy thoughts.
He also does not really understand why I need so many different conditioners and hair masks, but does not comment on it. He helps me with washing my hair and also with cassia treatments, which are a mess in our teeny tiny bathroom.
I donīt tell him how long I want to grow, because he cannot relate and itīs my hair after all. He often comments how pretty my buns are and he is in awe - how can I make them at the back of the head where I canīt see :lol:

TatsuOni
January 27th, 2024, 08:41 AM
My DH (being bald himself) finds it incomprehensible that I can talk about hair-related topics every single day and still have something new to say. He does not mind me telling him interesting facts about hair sometimes, but LHC is definitely an outlet I need for my hairy thoughts.
He also does not really understand why I need so many different conditioners and hair masks, but does not comment on it. He helps me with washing my hair and also with cassia treatments, which are a mess in our teeny tiny bathroom.
I donīt tell him how long I want to grow, because he cannot relate and itīs my hair after all. He often comments how pretty my buns are and he is in awe - how can I make them at the back of the head where I canīt see :lol:

My SO knows a lot more about hair, since he met me, than when he still had hair himself :lol:

Kelp
January 27th, 2024, 09:26 AM
He knows that I like having long hair, therefore he likes it too. It's not hard to make him happy! He understands the difference between normal showers and washday showers, knows that hair compliments are sure to make me blush, and will make sure my silk bonnet is set out for me when he makes the bed. He must think that my hair is very sensitive or something because if he lightly leans on my braid or brushes past it he'll say, "Ooh! Sorry!" :laugh:

He was glad when I found LHC because even though he didn't know me when I spent a lot of time on forums as a teenager, he knew I was looking for community and that the nostalgia was exciting. I also don't spend too much time here, usually just in the mornings before he's even awake, so it's not a point of contention.

He's currently growing out his hair (we gave him an undercut, #3 on the sides and back with the long viking-style hair on top. He wants the long part to his shoulder) and he can now gather it into a little ponytail! He also used to grow a very long beard, so I've spent a lot of time teaching him how to care for his hair, styling it, studying barbers, etc. He's always so supportive of whatever I like to do with my appearance, so I want to give him the same.

Sometimes my longhair habits will bleed into both of our daily lives. When I was looking for new bedsheets I opted for satin, and he ended up preferring them to anything else. There is, of course, hair everywhere and he is fascinated by the amount that I can lose yet still have a full head of it. He enjoys the scents of my conditioners and masks, though! One of the main things he likes is that he gets to see my hair down all the time at the end of the day when it's a rare sight for most other people :)

blackgothicdoll
January 27th, 2024, 12:22 PM
The person I've been seeing for awhile now has past waist length hair, as he wants to donate. He's 1a or b, but we still talk hair products and treatments, and I braid it for him when he wants. He loves my different hair styles and is very supportive in me growing it out. He's one of few people I dated who enjoys both my natural texture and my various braids and twists, especially when he sees it getting longer with proper care :D

Priska
January 31st, 2024, 11:03 AM
I only have an ex who I'm friend with, but he really likes my hair and wishes I would grow it to my knees. The longer the better. AND my long hair now also turns him on (he started to breathe somehow uncontrolled way when I asked what he thinks about my new long hair (while having it down and brushing it) and said that if I stay in his apartment we will soon be in bed -neither of us has a new spouse so we can joke like that).

I've noticed that for many other guys too woman's long hair is a turn on. Same day with that conversation with my ex, when I left out, I was hurrying to a bus and I made a mistake in traffic and walked on a car road and there was a car coming after me. I couldn't change it because there was so much snow and I looked to the car a little afraid and apologizing, but the man that was driving the car was just staring at me like hypnotized and made some kind of bowing with his head. This really usually doesn't happen to me, but then I was having my hair down and well taken care of... can't know for sure the reason of course, but I've heard it from a few guys that woman's long hair is a sexual thing too.

sapphire-o
January 31st, 2024, 12:21 PM
Well DH grew his hair long, then our second son, then our first son. Now we're a family of long hairs. :D First son won the genetic lottery, though. He now has classic length sheet of silky auburn hair, and he never did anything to protect it.

mochichichi
January 31st, 2024, 12:54 PM
My partner loves my long hair and we muse about him learning to take care of it so I can be pampered but have it treated as gently as I want it to be.

floridaorchid
February 1st, 2024, 06:23 PM
He's super supportive of whatever I do, as long as it's not bangs. He encourages me to interact with the community!