View Full Version : Well, I did it.

January 9th, 2016, 09:12 PM
I chopped my waist length hair. After several weeks of debate, last Tues. I broke out the scissors and got busy.

My original plan was to cut it back to bsl, and if then apl if that didn't satisfy me. Well, it didn't quite work out that way. You see, it turns out the bra I wore so long ago when I was checking if I was at bsl before sits a lot lower on my body than the one I put on to cut my hair last week. So it's actually a lot closer to apl than bsl. Ooops. That's okay though; honestly, apl is what I really wanted all along. Starting with bsl was really just to appease the fear that I'd regret cutting. I don't. In fact, a couple days later I took a bit more off both to even up the hemline, and to make it a little shorter. And on the subject of shorter: as I was trimming I had the thought that if I wasn't careful I'd inadvertently end up back at shoulder. That made me ask myself if that would really be such a bad thing. The answer was no. It would be inconvenient yes, that's shorter than I wanted to go, but not that big a deal. I think that internal reaction is telling. I did the right thing (for me).

Four days later and I'm still happy with it. Saturday is wash day for me, and yesterday I found myself actually looking forward to washing my hair for the first time I can remember. And it was much more pleasant than I was last week. Not only did I not need nearly as much conditioner for my cwc, but afterwards I could actually wrap my hair in the floursack towel I bought specifically for that purpose years ago, but haven't been able to use because my hair outgrew it. Heck, last week it was verging on too long for the T shirt I've been using! I have discovered one hiccup so far: I need to relearn how to do a lazy wrap, since my current method is meant for very long hair and doesn't work very well on mine anymore.

When I actually have money for it I want to go to a hairdresser for a trim up. That way, it'll be definitely at apl, and the hemline will be nice and even.

I think the main reason I hesitated to cut it wasn't even fear of regret, it was the sunk-cost fallacy. I spent six years growing from pixie to waist; if I chop half of it off now I wasted all that time. What was even the point? But I realized that's not true. I learned a lot about how to take care of my hair, and learned a lot of updos, and braids. And when I first started growing my hair out way back in 2009, I only did it because I missed being able to braid my hair. I have no idea how I got into the cycle of growing to a point, moving the goal posts, and growing more. But I don't regret that either. And I learned something pretty important about myself: if I ever grow my hair out again, I actually do need regular trims. Once it gets past a certain length, my hair just starts splitting no matter well I take care of it. If I could commit myself to s&d'ing at least once a week religiously, I might could stay on top of it. But I can't. I've learned that the hard way from failure after failure, and it shouldn't have taken this long for me to accept that. Especially since I remember watching a video by Torrin Paige where she talks about how the last two inches of her hair were damaged, but she really wanted to get to classic and told herself it'd be okay if she just babied it, and ended up having to cut off seven inches instead. But trimming would've slowed my progress, and honestly, it made me feel like a failure. It's very easy to get the impression on this site that nobody else trims regularly, so if I have to there's clearly something wrong with me, right? Well, no. There's nothing wrong with me or my hair. If I find trimming a half inch off my hair every couple months easier than s&d, that just means it'll actually get done when it needs to, rather than whenever I can summon up the mental energy to force myself to do it. Health is more important than length, right?

And these six years have one unexpected...bonus? Not sure what to call it. I was going to blow dry my hair because wet hair in cold weather sucks. But I didn't, get this, because I can't remember how I was doing it! :laugh:

January 9th, 2016, 09:20 PM
I'm so glad you're happy with the decision to cut. I think sometimes growing hair that doesn't do what you want can be quite the chore. What's the point if you are constantly worrying about it, focusing on thin ends, split ends, which oil to use, is it too dry, am I washing it too much etc etc etc

Hair is there to be be enjoyed, enjoy it!!!

Do you have any future plans at the moment for your hair? :)

January 10th, 2016, 04:59 AM
As long as you're happy with your decision, it's fine. And you can always grow back - it's not the end of the world. :)

January 10th, 2016, 06:55 AM
Ooo I bet all your hair is now super duper healthy, beautiful and gets a lot less tangles now that all of the damage has been cut. I've been toying with cutting a couple inches off mine especially because I abused it before really following advice on LHC. I've found that catnip tea soaks have helped me stretch the time between trims.

January 10th, 2016, 09:35 AM
I'm glad you're happy with your new length, and learned about yourself in the process of growing it out. Be happy with your hair. :)

Thanks for sharing your story. It'll help others with similiar feelings and experiences. They'll know they aren't alone. :flowers:

chen bao jun
January 10th, 2016, 11:25 AM
Very interesting.

I'm glad I read it. For one thing, it was encouraging to hear that it took someone else six years to grow to waist. Often, it seems as if everyone else on here but me has grown to waist already in two years. While I am at three and a half years and just reached bra strap stretched. It will be six years for me. If I get there.

I was also interested when you talked about the cycle of growing to a point, moving the goal posts, and growing more. This has been true for me. i came on here just hoping to get to APL (stretched) with hair in improved condtion. Somehow I ended being stressed that I can't get to waist in 3 years. I don't know how.

It's also true what you said, though. I've learned so much.

I am not ready to cut my hair yet and still want to reach my goal but I might not always be in the place where I am now, so far as that. I looked at photos last week of me with my short damaged hair some years back, and was shocked to realize that I looked cute anyway and my short damaged hair actually looked cute, too and that it didn't really matter--It's good to get some perspective every once in a while. Thanks.

January 10th, 2016, 08:10 PM
Thanks for the replies; I'm glad if sharing my experience helps someone else.

Right now the only plans I have for my hair are to relearn good styles for APL hair. I didn't pay much attention the first time around, because I was in such a hurry to reach the next milestone.

January 10th, 2016, 10:31 PM
APL is not something I don't consider sometimes. You can wear it down. You can do all kinds of styling stuff. It's a good length. :)