View Full Version : Growing older with long hair
Freija
December 11th, 2015, 05:55 PM
:waving:
I hope it's okay - I was just hoping to hear some lovely stories, thoughts, celebration and general positivity about growing older with long hair - whether it has always been with you, you are growing it for the first time, or coming back to it again after a break.
I guess I'm feeling a bit pensive this evening, if that is the right word. I am pretty sure now that my long, (mostly) virgin hair is going to be my companion for many, many years; I won't cut it or dye it beyond the tips. And that means that one day, my hair will be very different from the way it is now. It will go through changes I have no idea about and can't really imagine, especially since I don't know anybody with long or natural hair who isn't my own age or younger, outside of TLHC. I don't really have female relatives I can ask.
So... I am really curious about things like texture changes, colour changes (what is it actually like when it comes through and grows out? Is it ombre, for a while?), routine and care changes. And I am so, so in the mood to hear good, inspiring things, about how beautiful shining renegrey hair can be, or how perfect it is with henna or dye; about those of you who love and embrace it; about how it's not all downhill from seventeen, and you can have the best hair of your life at any time.
Please? : )
trolleypup
December 11th, 2015, 06:56 PM
For most people, the transition from no silvers to silvers is gradual...single hair by single hair losing their pigment or changing texture...so no sudden changes. The sudden changes you see are people going from dyed to not dyed or whatever.
hanne jensen
December 12th, 2015, 01:34 AM
I'm 56 years old and have longish hair for the first time in my life. I'm growing to terminal because I'm curious.
My hair color is a few shades darker than when I was in my 20's and I have some gray hairs. I leave them alone because I've worked damned hard for them. They are my medal for surviving life. To keep my grays shiny and pretty I de-mineralize my hair about every 6-8 weeks with 2 parts ACV, one part water and a good dollop of clarifying poo. My texture and growth rate is the same as it's always been. My hair thickness is also the same.
My hair routine changes from milestone to milestone as my hair is very picky. What is working now at waist length won't work at all at hip length. My hair likes to be bratty. That is no different than 20 years ago.
lapushka
December 12th, 2015, 03:59 AM
I'm 43, and have a light sprinkling of white hairs throughout. I found one or two in my early twenties. Two decades later, it is still only here and there, like a salt shaker went through it - lightly still. No sudden streaks of gray. Nothing. It all happens very very slowly, on my end it does.
I wouldn't panic.
I did it all to my hair. I had my later teens, twenties, early thirties to experiment, got it all out of my system. And now recently hit classic, going back to the hair I had when I was 10/11 years old. Felt a bit emotional. I loved that hair. Love mine, now. Sometimes I think well what if I cut it back short (this is a cycle, I always get those thoughts right before wash day, at the end of a week), but then... nah. I love it like this now. We'll see what the future brings.
embee
December 12th, 2015, 05:02 AM
I found that as I got older I wore my hair up more often, it was more convenient that way for everything. So the color and texture don't matter nearly as much. Wearing my hair up has eliminated cutting, salon visits, even frequent washings. Yes, there are silvery threads in places, ok. Yes, there are texture changes - I have frizzy side pieces now, but I like them - for all my life I've had stick-straight hair so the frizzy is softening and kind of fun.
vpatt
December 12th, 2015, 05:11 AM
I had longer hair when I was younger and then at about 30 I began chopping and later coloring....mostly bleach. About 4 years ago I decided to grow out the bleach and found lots of silver, not surprising at my age. A year or so ago I decided to let it grow and I love it. It's a mystery how the color changes in pictures. Take a stroll through the Salt and Pepper thread if you want to see some beautiful silver tresses. There are so many ways the silver grows in on different people and I love it all.
Anabell
December 12th, 2015, 09:07 AM
I'm not old yet. But I definitely grow up as my hair got longer. I started to grow it our 10 years ago, when I was 15. It changed a lot, mainly because I started with layered, dyed hair (only highlights though). In between I did a full dye in red several times. As I continue to grow it my hair got much thicker and heavier, both because I gradually cut the layers off and I stop dye it. I rediscover my blond strike. My hairdresser always notice it and mention how cool is it. But it really disappeared with all the other highlights. When I dye it red this strike was a bot brighter red than the rest though. Now I am halfway there, the transition between the dyed hair and the natural hair is very gradual and looks like natural sun bleach over time. I can't wait it all will be virgin. I didn't see any silver strikes yet, but I keep telling everyone how cool it will be to have this long silver braid when I grow old.
EdG
December 12th, 2015, 09:29 AM
I had a few silvers even as a teenager. The number of silvers really took off when I reached 40. I am now 51.
Hair hasn't been among the top problems that I encountered with age. Eyesight and arthritis seem to be the biggest problems.
Ed
dogzdinner
December 12th, 2015, 10:00 AM
Im quite enjoying long hair and dont feel any urge to cut it coz Im over forty! Ive had a white streak since I was a child but now its kinda spread along my hairline and brought friends. I wasnt too impressed at first but now the white is long enough to create interesting swoops when I put my hair back....TBH I cant wait for it to be long enough to go in a bun and give me a swirly effect!LOL:D
EdG
December 12th, 2015, 10:09 AM
I cant wait for it to be long enough to go in a bun and give me a swirly effect!LOL:DI used to dread that I was turning gray. Then, I learned how to make a bun. Now, I flaunt my silvers. :)
Of course, I hadn't anticipated that the Silver Swirl would achieve self-awareness and spawn an advertising campaign. :rollin:
Ed
Groovy Granny
December 12th, 2015, 11:18 AM
I'll be 64 in January and never envisioned I'd be sporting long hair (@ hip) at my age :o
Here most 'curl up and dye' and wear short styles; only the 70+ crowd wear short silver(usually permed).
When I have up coloring at 50 after a stylist ruined my hair and I had to chop to collar length from waist, I started to see my silver and just assumed short was the way to manage it.
However I curl in warm weather (especially my fine silver) and my two textures were very hard to manage without heat and hair spray so I pondered growing it out.
I knew I'd be going against the grain here and even Hubby seemed hesitant, but with the support of LHC I made it, and am very happy to be 'me' :joy:
This is only the second time in my life that I have had a purpose/goal for my hair, and I am thrilled to be living authentically, and hope to inspire others to do the same :flower:
Yosha
December 13th, 2015, 05:57 AM
What a great topic, I love reading your stories :popcorn:
When I went to high school I cut my hair into a pixie. It didn't take long before I wanted to grow it out again. What I wanted was long curly blonde hair. What I had was short (practically) straight medium to dark brown hair. So I bleached and permed, while trying to grow it out :o Soon I found out that dark hair suited me way better. Also, there were some very bad experiences with hair salons, and then I started cutting it by myself.
When I was in my twenties my hair stayed at about BSL for the most time, and thought that was apparently the longest it could grow. There was a little less mistreating then. I suffered some hair loss, it went from very thick to the thicker side of normal. What I expected was that I'd cut my hair to a bob at 30, because I thought that was what it's supposed to be. And hoped that I'd turn silver quickly, so I could pretend it was blonde.
At 30 I had to wear my hair up for work, because the material I worked with was very delicate and I didn't want to swipe my hair through it. I wore it up more and more outside of work too. There were silvers splattered through my hair, but not many. I still dyed it now and then, mostly red (everyone told me how good that color looked). And sometimes henna, though it was becoming pretty hard to distribute. When I thought about cutting my hair back I got some nightmarish dreams. It started growing longer now and it got to classic. Also returned to a salon, a very good one and started using conditioner at the salon owner's advise. And when I moved houses I quit drying it over the heater (!)
When I got around 40 I started suffering hair loss again. There were some health problems (since my mid 30s), there still are. Often I feel like 80. Not my hair though ;) This time the hair grows back from the hair loss (yeah it will take a while to reach greater lengths but still). I found hair forums :D That helped a lot growing it past classic. Half way through my forties now, my hair is past my knees. I would have never thought that was possible! There were more silvers, and I decided to grow out the henna. For a while I dealt with feeling very unpretty about how my hair looked, not enough silvers and too much blah, with a very pretty color in the length where the henna still showed. Seeing all these beautiful women showing off their beautiful natural silvers made me want to embrace mine too. But I would have been about 60 by the time it would have grown out and who knows if it stayed to my knees until then. And all that time me being unhappy about my hair? So I decided to henna it again recently (the red suits my skin color better than my own color, I think it's because I'm not well and that turns my skin color to look more gray than it should be, the red enhances it to a more healthy glow). No blonde or silver for me, but I'm ok with it now. It's never been more soft and beautiful and long (and red) than it is now. I expect it to go less pretty as I get older, which is any day. It's starting to get thinner, but I have quite a lot of hair so I'm very lucky that it doesn't show much.
The thing I least expected was that I'm now more happy than ever with my hair :D Maybe it doesn't look that pretty to others, but it makes me feel pretty.
chen bao jun
December 13th, 2015, 07:41 PM
I agree with what's been said already. I'm 58. Greying is happening very gradually. I got my first grey hair at 30 or so. Now you can finally see them in a noticeable amount. I think they look pretty and I agree that 'it's my badge of honor for surviving life."
There hasn't been any texture change. I waffle back and forth on whether I'm thinning or not. My hair is very thick and I can't tell if there is less of it or not, honestly.
I trashed my hair for much of my life, sometimes through ignorance, sometimes deliberately. I like how it behaves now that I treat it well. As Lapushka said, I've got my childhood hair back here and I love it.
I've never had long hair by LHC standards. I usually have been somewhere between APL and BSL. I've been on here three years and I still am. Only now its not artificially straightened, so I guess its longer. I'm gradually getting to feel as if it will never be 'long' but I would like it to be as long as possible and I love it when older women have long hair. My grandmother did.
chen bao jun
December 14th, 2015, 06:14 AM
This is how much grey I have. Picture was taken last night. As I said, I'm 58. It's less than 'typical' at this age, I think, but its there and as I said, been coming on gradually for a long time.
I think you have to be Marie Antoinette and be separated violently from your husband and kids, see your best friend's head paraded by your window on a stick and be told your own head is going to be cut off to have your hair actually turn white overnight.
http://i1280.photobucket.com/albums/a481/uloma1/Mobile%20Uploads/20151213_172241_zpsf69rrfnc.jpg (http://s1280.photobucket.com/user/uloma1/media/Mobile%20Uploads/20151213_172241_zpsf69rrfnc.jpg.html)
rags
December 14th, 2015, 06:39 AM
Unlike the others, my silvers tend to come in "crops" - I get a bunch of them at once, to where I actually get a demarcation line! LOL. There is another member here who does that also; we commiserate on the salt and pepper thread. But I've had silvers for a long while now. I guess I saw my first one in my late teens/early twenties (I don't really remember), and by 25 I had the "Rogue from X-men" streak going that you see in my siggy (that pic is old - I'm much more silver now!).
My hair has thinned as I've gotten older, and as I went through menopause it turned quite wavy! I'd always had stick straight hair before, so that was a shock!
I"ve had some very significant health problems, and had to take a med that made me lose a lot of hair, which is just now regrowing, so presently my hair is between shoulder and APL, cut back form hip. It's thinner than before, but with a crop of regrowth that is entirely silver and only a couple of inches long. It makes me look rather like a silver dandelion when I put my hair up! And I absolutely adore my hair!
It's too thin to be conventionally beautiful, but I love it anyway. It's soft, very very fine, and I think the silver makes it look prettier than it would without. I've lost over 50 percent of my hair twice now (both times medication related that I HAD to take to live), and so I'm very glad to have hair, and I'm enjoying every minute of my silvers!
I've always wanted to be the granny with the long silver braid. It may be the size of a pencil, but I have the granny part - so now I only have to get the long back! :lol:
chen bao jun
December 14th, 2015, 06:44 AM
Hugs, Rags, your hair is beautiful and you will get the length again. You are a brave lady.
lapushka
December 14th, 2015, 03:12 PM
This is how much grey I have. Picture was taken last night. As I said, I'm 58. It's less than 'typical' at this age, I think, but its there and as I said, been coming on gradually for a long time.
I think you have to be Marie Antoinette and be separated violently from your husband and kids, see your best friend's head paraded by your window on a stick and be told your own head is going to be cut off to have your hair actually turn white overnight.
http://i1280.photobucket.com/albums/a481/uloma1/Mobile%20Uploads/20151213_172241_zpsf69rrfnc.jpg (http://s1280.photobucket.com/user/uloma1/media/Mobile%20Uploads/20151213_172241_zpsf69rrfnc.jpg.html)
I think that's about as much as I have, at age 43, so: not bad! :D
roseomalley
December 14th, 2015, 08:53 PM
I wi. Be 70 in June. I started growing from a short bob in August, 2013. My hair was not colored. I am white in the front and silver in the back. I wear it up everyday. I love the different patterns created by the various shades of white and silvers in my hair. My hair is fine and straight, with some curly strays on the side. The length now is four inches from waist.
Zindell
December 14th, 2015, 10:39 PM
I wi. Be 70 in June. I started growing from a short bob in August, 2013. My hair was not colored. I am white in the front and silver in the back. I wear it up everyday. I love the different patterns created by the various shades of white and silvers in my hair. My hair is fine and straight, with some curly strays on the side. The length now is four inches from waist.
Your hair is absolutely stunning! :crush:
LadyLong
December 15th, 2015, 12:06 AM
Lovely long hair, Roseomalley! The length looks pretty in this photo of Renegray.
Amapola
December 15th, 2015, 08:28 AM
Nice thread. I love the stories so far.
Well, I'll be 60 in June. Take a look at all that grey:
<-
:rollin: My hair is so fine the greys sort of disappear. And yeah, I don't have many yet. Everybody is going to be different, just as we all have different textures etc. So although I long for glorious white hair like my mother has I might not get it.
For me, the journey has been about accepting what I have. I see people with different hair and think how wonderful it would be to have hair like that... but I don't. I have what I have. There are good things and bad things about all hair types, each has their strength and weakness. Mine is super-fine, stick-straight and delicate and there are strengths to that which I have come to appreciate and embrace.
As far as changes in hair, they usually happen so gradually (not always, but usually) that you have plenty of time to adjust. I used to worry about going past fingertip in length, I thought I would not be able to detangle, but now that I'm at FTL I realize how silly I was. I'm used to my hair this length now and as it slips very gradually past the length of my arm I am dealing with it just fine.
I also really like what was said earlier, that it's unlikely to be your hair you worry the most about as you get older. In the meantime, glory in what you have! Yes, things will be different when you are 59. But if you spend all your time worrying about that, you won't have time to enjoy being 25! Focus on what you have, and focus on what you can do. This is what I try and do. I try and savor each and every day.
dulce
December 15th, 2015, 05:59 PM
I had hair to my butt but then was diagnosed with aggressive breast cancer at age 62.After multiple surgeries including DMX,I am regrowing my hair.It literally fell out in handfuls over several months and thinned out due to stress and multiple general anesthetics so I cut to BSL..Luckily I could avoid chemo,now am close to hip again..
slynr
December 15th, 2015, 06:01 PM
I had hair to my butt but then was diagnosed with aggressive breast cancer at age 62.After multiple surgeries including DMX,I am regrowing my hair.It literally fell out in handfuls over several months and thinned out due to stress and multiple general anesthetics so I cut to BSL..Luckily I could avoid chemo,now am close to hip again..
:grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:
lunasea
December 15th, 2015, 08:52 PM
I wi. Be 70 in June. I started growing from a short bob in August, 2013. My hair was not colored. I am white in the front and silver in the back. I wear it up everyday. I love the different patterns created by the various shades of white and silvers in my hair. My hair is fine and straight, with some curly strays on the side. The length now is four inches from waist.
Congratulations Rose! I remember when you were just starting this journey!
lunasea
December 15th, 2015, 08:54 PM
I had hair to my butt but then was diagnosed with aggressive breast cancer at age 62.After multiple surgeries including DMX,I am regrowing my hair.It literally fell out in handfuls over several months and thinned out due to stress and multiple general anesthetics so I cut to BSL..Luckily I could avoid chemo,now am close to hip again..
Another cancer survivor here. We are STRONG! You go girl! :rockerdud
Oh, I should add my story. I'm 61 and my hair is a few inches (maybe 3) from waist length. This is the longest it's ever been in my life. I have very fine, thin hair now and always did. Early in my life, my hair was very light blonde but it soon started darkening with age. When I was young I was told that my hair was too thin to grow long and that my fairy tale ends looked like rat tails. There was no LHC at that time and I had no idea of how to take care of my hair. I did every horrible thing that you can imagine to it. Blow frying, repeated bleaching, ripping a comb through, Velcro rollers; you name it, I did it. Of course my hair was in just terrible shape and it never got longer than a few inches past shoulder length no matter how hard I tried to let it grow. As a result so I ended up having it cut very short and bleaching it very light blonde.
In early 2013 I discovered this site and lurked for a while. At that time I began to toy with the idea of growing my hair out. After a while I stopped blow frying and decided to let it grow but I still couldn't give up the dye every 6 weeks. My hair started getting longer but it was still very thin. On 6/19/14 I finally stopped dying. I haven't cut my hair since. The bottom is very damaged. The top is darker than it's been in years BUT my silvers are beginning to look like platinum blonde highlights. With the help of some VERY KIND people here (you know who you are :flowers:) I am learning to love my natural color. When my hair reaches waist length I plan to begin micro trimming to get rid of the damage. At 61 I am looking forward to my dream of having long, undamaged hair for the first time in my life and I actually believe that it might come true.
So things can get better as you get older. Like the movie said..."Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're gonna get."
rags
December 16th, 2015, 07:14 AM
Amapola, yet your hair is so beautiful as it is! And for me too, the journey has been a lot about learning to love what I have.
Dulce, :grouphug: I'm glad you're feeing okay now and coming around a bit. Best wishes for continued good health! :flower:
Rose, it seems like you jus started and your hair should only be about APL or so still, LOL. Although I know it feels like much longer to you! Anyway, I happen to think your hair is some of the most beautiful on the boards - so silvery white and ethereal. I find it quite lovely!
Lunasea, you know that I think your natural hair colour is very pretty indeed - those different colors swirled together. Gorgeous!
Madora
December 16th, 2015, 09:07 AM
I'm 69 and a half and have had long hair since high school (though have had it cut to shoulder length at least 3 times).
My hair has pretty much stayed the same except for some moderate greying which started when I was 55. My hair is still predominately brown. Thru the decades I've stayed with the same products/procedures except that I switched over to using mineral oil in place of conditioning after shampooing.
Due to anemia..and schleroderma issues, I lost at least a third of the thickness in my hair..especially so on the right hand side. I'll never get it back but considering my age, I have a pretty good head of hair left.
If you love your long hair and want to keep it beautiful and healthy for years to come, treat it gently. Also, learn how to do various updos so that you won't become bored with it. Hairstyling is the one thing I miss nowadays as arthritis is beginning to creep in and my muscles can't take the "burn" any more. I have a few workarounds that I've discovered and can still braid my hair...so as long as I can do that, I'm happy.
Top pic in yellow top taken in 2003 when I started. Bottom pic: last year http://i177.photobucket.com/albums/w225/07Erzbet/101514ThenandNow20032014_edited-1.jpg (http://s177.photobucket.com/user/07Erzbet/media/101514ThenandNow20032014_edited-1.jpg.html)
vpatt
December 16th, 2015, 10:22 AM
Oh Madora, I love your hair! I noticed it when I first joined in May. You are one of my hair idols.
Groovy Granny
December 16th, 2015, 10:33 AM
I'm 69 and a half and have had long hair since high school (though have had it cut to shoulder length at least 3 times).
My hair has pretty much stayed the same except for some moderate greying which started when I was 55. My hair is still predominately brown. Thru the decades I've stayed with the same products/procedures except that I switched over to using mineral oil in place of conditioning after shampooing.
Due to anemia..and schleroderma issues, I lost at least a third of the thickness in my hair..especially so on the right hand side. I'll never get it back but considering my age, I have a pretty good head of hair left.
If you love your long hair and want to keep it beautiful and healthy for years to come, treat it gently. Also, learn how to do various updos so that you won't become bored with it. Hairstyling is the one thing I miss nowadays as arthritis is beginning to creep in and my muscles can't take the "burn" any more. I have a few workarounds that I've discovered and can still braid my hair...so as long as I can do that, I'm happy.
Top pic in yellow top taken in 2003 when I started.
I too have admired your beautiful hair and appreciated your advice since 2013 (as a silent stalker :eyebrows:) lol
Thanks so much for your inspiration :flowers:
Sarahlabyrinth
December 16th, 2015, 11:34 AM
You have certainly been such an inspiration and support for me in my own hair growing journey, Madora! It's always a jaw - dropping moment seeing your wonderful hair :) :crush:
Madora
December 16th, 2015, 04:38 PM
Thanks so much for your kind words, vpatt, Groovy Granny and Sarahlabyrinth!
Groovy Granny
December 16th, 2015, 05:28 PM
Thanks so much for your kind words, vpatt, Groovy Granny and Sarahlabyrinth!
You are very welcome ~ well deserved!!
So sorry to hear of your medical conditions ~ you'll be in my prayers (((hugs)))
sugar&nutmeg
December 16th, 2015, 05:35 PM
Just the thread I needed to see!
I'm 62, and growing out a pixie...again. If I let myself, I can get a bit down, wondering 'what's the point, at my age?' It's inspiring to see the beautiful long hair here; gives me hope that I'll have years (God willing) to enjoy my long hair...once it's long again.
roseomalley
December 16th, 2015, 08:29 PM
[QUOTE=rags;3137350]
Rose, it seems like you jus started and your hair should only be about APL or so still, LOL. Although I know it feels like much longer to you! Anyway, I happen to think your hair is some of the most beautiful on the boards - so silvery white and ethereal. I find it quite lovely!
Rags, you have no idea what a boost you have given me. Thank you.
Zindell
December 16th, 2015, 10:04 PM
I love your silvery half-ups sugar&nutmeg and roseomalley! :crush:
(Soon you'll be there again s&n)
stelz
December 17th, 2015, 01:43 AM
I grew my hair from shoulder length to butt length in the 90's and have been keeping it like that ever since. I have surprisingly few greys for my age, no streaks or solid chunks, just a little salt and pepper effect. I'm not bragging as I would really prefer a dramatic streak or to, to having them scattered like that. The grays are actually kind of silvery-white and almost sparkly, with more tendency to curl than my "regular" hair. So there is a texture difference. But I haven't had to change anything as there's just not that many. If I ever get a full head of them I'll be happy to update, but at this rate I'll have to live to 100. :/
akuamoonmaui
December 24th, 2015, 08:20 PM
I had long hair when I was in grade school. In high school it was always about shoulder length and that lasted through the early years of my marriage. I had a horrible haircut in 2001 and was pretty much sheared. It seemed I could never really get length back again. (Scissors had a huge part in that.... :scissors:) I was an emotional hair cutter and it took getting a divorce to gain my direction again. I now have tailbone length, healthy hair. I don't see cutting my hair shorter in the future. Fortunately, I live in a geographic area that does not have "age expectations" on hair length so I won't have that to deal with.
I've enjoyed growing my hair over the last 7 years (5 years on LHC), it is definitely a journey of dedication, patience and conscious care.
Mimha
December 27th, 2015, 11:50 AM
What a great thread !... :) :)
What could I add to what has been said ?... Maybe that my age has never been an issue, hair-wise, I mean. I have never been into any fashion concern, so being 20, 50 or 80 doesn't change much. In my family, long hair is a natural thing for a woman, and my grand-mother (who was a mountain farmer) has had long hair all her life. I have been through some healthy problems though, which became really problematic in my mid forties. I suffered from several deficiencies and food intolerances, fungus issues, severe chronic fatigue, anemia, joints/muscles pains, hair loss... not to mention concentration problems, anxiety, insomnia, etc. I was 45 and I felt like I was 85.
I had to change my diet to a low carb one, with lots of organic fresh veggies and tons of food complements until, month after month, I started feeling better. It took me years but my life has tremendously changed. I am back to the weight I had in my 20ties. I look 10 or 15 years younger than my age, and my hair has grown back denser, healthier, shinier, wavier than ever ! Every day it amazes me and I can't believe it looks so much better now that I am 50 than when I was 40 !
I enjoy every day of growth here : it's so nice and fun to share long hair love with people who enjoy the same thing ! My hair is really a source of happiness : I feel beautiful with it. I enjoy taking care of it, touching it, feeling it. And I see no reason why I should deprive myself from this pleasure given to me by Mother Nature (and Mother too^^) when I am the one who cares for it. I appreciate the fact that it is easy to care for, cheap (I use very little products, no electric stuff, and never go to the hairdresser), and I can either wear it up and forget it, or wear it up and look super class, or wear it down and look either wild or gorgeous, depending of my mood. Well... concerning the cheapness, I didn't mean my new addiction to hairtoys, ha ha ha ha ! :laugh:
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