Damage woes

[queenofheartz44]

Hello! I am getting frustrated with my hair now... I will do braids at night but when go to brush out my hair in the morning, I cringe because I know there will be breakage. The breakage is not NEARLY as it was a year ago but it's still there. Do you know of any good detanglers? I like to use more natural product on my hair if possible and to be honest, I probably haven't been doing my weekly oil hot treatment ad much as I should. Sometimes it all just seems so stinking tedious nursing my hair and I neglect it. 😕

Here's the daily amount of breakage I get from brushing once.
http://i68.tinypic.com/29krpxu.jpg
http://i63.tinypic.com/2z3vpr8.jpg
http://i64.tinypic.com/b8a0k0.jpg
http://i64.tinypic.com/cklly.jpg

Am I my own worst hair critic or do I need to reevaluate my routine again?

[cat11]

Are you actually brushing your hair or combing it?? With your hair type Id definitely wide tooth comb or finger comb. It takes a lot longer to do it the right, gentle way but its really really worth it. Number one thing, I think, for preserving the integrity/smoothness of your hair and preventing breakage.

Palmers Olive Oil detangle and shine spray is an AMAZING detangler. You can find it in the ethnic hair section in Walmart. It's my favorite. And you don't have to use a lot (you could probably use more without getting greasy than I can)

Also putting on olive or sunflower oil on the bottom three or four inches (maybe for you 2-3) and then letting it sit by itself for 5 mins, THEN combing once it's absorbed and softer helps. :)

A sleep cap DRASTICALLY helps morning tangles.. I use one and it almost made the problem void. Barely any tangles fom night to morning if I detangle before bed. (usually don't though, just in the morning. I detangle once a day.)

I think that you are on the right track doing it every day and morning though. when you keep braiding your hair and putting it up without combing it the tangles get bad and breakage is much worse. So I'm sure that's helping you. I also don't know what your other routine is, maybe you're doing some of the stuff I mentioned, maybe not. But I hope it helps.

Your progress looks great btw.

[queenofheartz44]

I have a large paddle brush, finger combing never seems to get the tangles out or leave a smooth appearance. I start at the ends and work up from there usually in sections. My arms get a bit of a workout from the thickness of it sometimes haha!

[Nique1202]

I have a large paddle brush, finger combing never seems to get the tangles out or leave a smooth appearance. I start at the ends and work up from there usually in sections. My arms get a bit of a workout from the thickness of it sometimes haha!

Brushing will cause a lot more damage and breakage than combing. You say you like to use more "natural" products, but you may have to use something more synthetic (with silicones or polyquats) to patch up some of the damage wash-to-wash and make your hair more slippery, and definitely give up the paddle brush. Ideally, you want to get your hair to a state where you CAN get it smooth and tangle-free with just finger combing or a wide-toothed comb. You might even be able to use a Tangle Teezer, lots of folks find those less damaging than full brushes, but the paddle brush is not only causing the immediate breakage but is also causing long-term damage every time you use it to pull through tangles.

It's one thing to want to minimize your ecological impact, or use products that are cruelty-free, or what have you, but using "natural" for its own sake may not be compatible with your hair goals. You have to consider what your hair needs at least as much as what you want to use with regard to products. All products on store shelves are safe to use, unless you have a specific allergy they will not hurt you, and it looks like you may have to choose between "natural" products and long hair.

[meteor]

I definitely wouldn't be using a paddle brush as a detangling tool!

I think fingers and/or seamless wide-tooth comb are the best tools for detangling, maybe followed by some special detangling brushes (only for some hairtypes), e.g. Denman/Tangle Teezer/Wet Brush.
Curlies in particular often need to avoid brushing.
Also, most curlies I know can only detangle their hair wet in the shower and soaked in conditioner, to help with elasticity, and the rest of the time finger-comb only. You could try that and see if it reduces the amount of breakage.

For preventing tangles, I'd recommend sleeping on silk/satin pillowcase (or use a silky bonnet or scarf) and use more oils and silicones. For example, pre-poo oiling, oil rinses in the shower, sealing with a couple drops of oil/silicone serum out of the shower... this should really help increase the hair's elasticity. HTH! :flower:

[Arctic]

Your daily breakage is almost as much or approx same amount of hair as my recent dusting (mini-micro-trimming) left on the sink. Definitely reevaluate your routine.

[cat11]

I have a large paddle brush, finger combing never seems to get the tangles out or leave a smooth appearance. I start at the ends and work up from there usually in sections. My arms get a bit of a workout from the thickness of it sometimes haha!

Honestly a paddle brush is the absolute worse thing you could be detangling with. Most people into hair care with your hair type don't use them at all, and IF they do it's as a smoothing tool AFTER the hair is detangled. That's what brushes are for, not detangling. You should have separate tools for that or use your fingers. Yes, it requires patience. Yes, you might go from taking 5 minutes to detangle to 20+. Is your hair worth it? It's up to you. But that brushing is hair murder and with your hair type in the future could really stall/slow your growth.

edit: If you have a hard time with it watch vids of people finger and wide tooth combing with your hair type. Even other hair types should help but its always good to find someone with your type hair. You can get a lot of tips and gain good techiniques.

[spidermom]

My thoughts exactly. Detangling with a paddle brush is not good.

[lapushka]

That's honestly not a lot of hair to lose on a daily basis. I too would make sure you are using a comb before a brush. A brush is no detangler, it is to smooth the hair after you've detangled and to get the last bit of the knots out.

[Kimberly]

Edit: lapushka pointed out to me that the OP has relaxed hair, which I hadn't noticed in her signature. Sorry about that, queenofheartz! I don't know how much of the following advice is applicable.
-----

You are fighting your hair type. Your hair is curly and you are treating it as if it is straight. A "smooth appearance" is an unrealistic expectation for most curly hair. Curly hair isn't smooth -- it wants to curl. Attempts to make curly hair lie smooth and flat are almost guaranteed to cause breakage, unless you're really careful and dealing with a weak curl (like a loose 3a).

For your hair type, a paddle brush is no good for detangling, and is likely not a good idea for brushing at all. Almost any curly who uses a brush like that ends up with hair that looks like a startled porcupine (straight frizz) and a sink full of broken bits. I would suggest a finger comb to get the worst tangles, then combing in sections with a seamless, wide-tooth comb. You may not be able to detangle completely from ends to roots, the way straighties do, because of the curly hair's tendency to re-tangle at the ends while you are detangling nearer your head. You might get better results switching back and forth -- detangle at the ends, then the roots, back and forth, til you get to the middle and can get a comb all the way through. It can take a while, but the alternative is ripping through the tangles, and a sink full of bits.

If you are really determined to get a smooth look, try WO, or lots of coconut oil or Nightshade's fabulous blends, or a heavy leave-in conditioner (you can even just leave in some of your regular conditioner, if it doesn't cause skin issues).

As a loose-curly, I have been happiest with my hair when I decided that it is pretty and I like it even though it doesn't fit the prevailing hair fashion in my culture or even around here at LHC. My curls escape in little tendrils, they float, they move in the wind, and sometimes I have a halo. I actually had to leave LHC for a while because that bothered me so much, but now ... Heck, angels have halos, too, right?

I am sure you will stop the breakage –- you're getting a lot of good advice here from a lot of people, and I am sure some curlier curly than I will come along soon enough to talk about detangling in the shower.

[lapushka]

You are fighting your hair type. Your hair is curly and you are treating it as if it is straight. A "smooth appearance" is an unrealistic expectation for most curly hair. Curly hair isn't smooth -- it wants to curl. Attempts to make curly hair lie smooth and flat are almost guaranteed to cause breakage, unless you're really careful and dealing with a weak curl (like a loose 3a).

I think the OP is relaxed, Kimberly. :) If I'm not mistaken... :hmm:

[Kimberly]

I think the OP is relaxed, Kimberly. :) If I'm not mistaken... :hmm:

Oh! I didn't see anything about that in the OP, so probably missed it elsewhere in my lurking. I guess my advice is probably not as useful as I hoped, and I am crossing my fingers that someone with relaxed-hair advice will post something better.

Edit: queenofheartz's profile says straight-ironing, but doesn't mention using chemical relaxers. More info about your routine might help us to troubleshoot, queenofheartz! :-)

Edit again: aha, now I see where "relaxed" is mentioned in measurements in your signature, queenofheartz. I am leaving my other post there, in case it is helpful to someone else, but I don't have experience with relaxed hair. Wish I could have been more help!

[vega]

I would recommend a Hercules sage man wide tooth comb, working from bottom to top , that way you eliminate any breakage

[Hairkay]

I'd check to see if the hair ends are dry. If they you may need to try some deep conditioning treatments and try oiling the hair ends regularly LOC/LCO style.

[juniperjetcat]

I used to have seriously dry and brittle hair and no matter what I tried nothing really helped the breakage. When I used a hot oil treatment that did seem to lessen the issue for a little but it was not a long term fix. I tried all kinds of things from kitchen coconut oil, to expensive shampoos, to special detangling combs, to salon treatments but ultimately always landed up with the same breakage drama after a few days.

If you see any of my other postings in the forum you will know I go on about the WO that I began in May this year. I know it is not for everyone but it has really made a massive difference to me. If natural products is what you want, you don't really get more natural than water only. I have seen a marked difference in the quality of my hair and the breakage. It has improved exponentially to a point where people are actually commenting on the condition of my hair. If WO is not your cup of tea perhaps you can try gentler products, ACV rinses (although the smell is not always fun), letting your hair stay unwashed for longer periods and allowing natural oils to moisturize your hair. Definitely paddle brushing and wet hair combing is a big no no.

Good luck! Keep us updated!

[queenofheartz44]

Thank you so much for all of your responses! Sorry it's taken me do long to reply! Where to start? Why I first joined this site a couple of years ago, my breakage was so bad, that whenever I brushed it it would look like I just had a full trim. It was really bad. I used to use my flat iron a few times a week and now I may use it once or twice a month. I shampoo now up to twice a week only because I workout regularly and don't want a sweaty scalp all the time. I shampoo the scalp only and condition from the ears down. I try to coat my length in conditioner before I shampoo but I don't always remember to do that.

I do have a tangle teaser but it doesn't really seem to do anything if that makes sense? I don't know if it's because my hair is thick and coarse if I'm using the wrong technique with it. Too big of sections perhaps?

Now for the silly sounding part. My hair has been relaxed since I was 8, so 19 years. I love my hair being relaxed. The curl pattern that I would have I just can't stand. No matter where I go, if I ask for hair care tips I always have to provide my life story behind the relaxing, how long it has been done, why I would do it, do I know that it is damaging, etc. It's exhausting. I've learned not to ask how to care for my hair or mention the relaxers (mind you this is mainly in black communities where natural purists do the most attacking). If you relax your hair you guarantee ostracization because you find it easier.

In my mind, if I leave use natural products without sulfates and such, I won't get as much flack as if I used regular products. I have no clue if this makes sense or not and I do not want to offend anybody, but on here, I get the impression that using natural products is like the one ring to rule them all.

I'm trying to break the stigma that all relaxed hair is damaged and show people that your hair can be relaxed and fairly healthy. I know it will never be as healthy as if I never did a thing to it. Lord, I hope this doesn't sound too harsh!

[meteor]

Thank you so much for all of your responses! Sorry it's taken me do long to reply! Where to start? Why I first joined this site a couple of years ago, my breakage was so bad, that whenever I brushed it it would look like I just had a full trim. It was really bad. I used to use my flat iron a few times a week and now I may use it once or twice a month. I shampoo now up to twice a week only because I workout regularly and don't want a sweaty scalp all the time. I shampoo the scalp only and condition from the ears down. I try to coat my length in conditioner before I shampoo but I don't always remember to do that.

I do have a tangle teaser but it doesn't really seem to do anything if that makes sense? I don't know if it's because my hair is thick and coarse if I'm using the wrong technique with it. Too big of sections perhaps?

Now for the silly sounding part. My hair has been relaxed since I was 8, so 19 years. I love my hair being relaxed. The curl pattern that I would have I just can't stand. No matter where I go, if I ask for hair care tips I always have to provide my life story behind the relaxing, how long it has been done, why I would do it, do I know that it is damaging, etc. It's exhausting. I've learned not to ask how to care for my hair or mention the relaxers (mind you this is mainly in black communities where natural purists do the most attacking). If you relax your hair you guarantee ostracization because you find it easier.

In my mind, if I leave use natural products without sulfates and such, I won't get as much flack as if I used regular products. I have no clue if this makes sense or not and I do not want to offend anybody, but on here, I get the impression that using natural products is like the one ring to rule them all.

I'm trying to break the stigma that all relaxed hair is damaged and show people that your hair can be relaxed and fairly healthy. I know it will never be as healthy as if I never did a thing to it. Lord, I hope this doesn't sound too harsh!

Queenofheartz44, I am not too aware about that hair texture purism & texture ostracizing, but sending hugs your way. :grouphug: I think we should all feel free to do whatever we want with our own hair. :flower: And as for "natural hair products", well, they are all produced in artificial conditions anyway (even food items that we may use in "natural" masks), and it's already illegal to sell unsafe cosmetics, so I'd really focus on things that make your scalp and hair happy! ;) (I think, at reasonable concentrations, sulfates are only problematic for people who either have sensitivities to them or have certain skin conditions, like eczema.)

- About detangling, have you tried using a wide-tooth comb and/or fingers to detangle first? It's just that, if you think that your hair is too thick or coarse for the Tangle Teezer or other detangling brushes, then other brushes would likely be even more problematic to use. :flower: I'd really stick to very wide-tooth rakes/combs or just fingers to prevent that kind of breakage. Also, I'd go very slowly and patiently and avoid rip through tangles but go back to knots and work them out horizontally with fingers or something pointy like an edge of a rat-tail comb or a bobby pin, for example.

- About coating hair in conditioner before washing... it can be great for some or can cause some build-up issues for others, due to different charges (cationic surfactants in conditioners are designed to follow the anionic surfactants in shampoos). Basically, it may work with some combinations of shampoos & conditioners better than with others, and if you do notice any build-up issues (excessive tangles, coated feeling, dryness, brittleness, etc), it might be better to switch to something else - for example, using oils as a pre-poo treatment?

- About flat irons: I think sleeping on silky smooth materials (e.g. satin pillowcases/bonnets/scarves) really helps preserve straight styles overnight for longer, so there is less need to retouch hair with damaging heat. :flower: Also, you could try some heat-free non-damaging straightening techniques, like doing hair doobies/wraps (for shorter lengths) or, for longer lengths, using a long tight ribbon (or even elastic pantyhose/tights) to wrap the ponytail with overnight - a method called "Le Kardoune" in French (sorry, I don't know the English name for this method, but it looks like this (http://photo2.ask.fm/139/471/062/910003025-1sa82g0-jcm0lbq6ti78c2f/original/1.jpg)), or even a caterpillar braid - if your hair is already relatively straight.

- And I think it can really help to give any chemically treated and/or heat-treated hair a regular dose of hydrolyzed proteins (http://science-yhairblog.blogspot.ca/2013/09/more-about-protein.html) (e.g. hydrolyzed keratin, silk, collagen, oat ... - more on this here (http://science-yhairblog.blogspot.ca/2015/10/protein-101-lots-of-basic-information.html)), penetrating oils (http://science-yhairblog.blogspot.ca/2014/03/oil-pre-shampoo-or-pre-wash.html)(e.g. coconut), silicones (http://science-yhairblog.blogspot.ca/2011/07/riffing-on-silicones.html), ceramides (http://www.thenaturalhavenbloom.com/2010/08/ceramides-patching-up-damaged-hair.html), 18-MEA (http://science-yhairblog.blogspot.ca/2012/04/why-is-this-ingredient-in-my-conditioner.html)...

Best of luck on your hair growth journey, queenofheartz44! :cheer:

[queenofheartz44]

Thank you so much meteor! Whenever I do my braids, I find my hair straightened out a good bit over the next couple of days hence me using my flat iron and only once or twice a month when I really wanna just have straight hair for once. I seem to be more at peace with my relaxed hair that is not flat ironed than I was previously.

As for the smooth appearance, I find it makes it easier to do various styles and help me maintain a professional image at the doctor's office I work at.

I've been looking into sleep caps I did try wrapping my head a couple of times using a scarf but I found the it came off in the middle of the night haha! I'll be picking up a couple of wide tooth comb as per everyones suggestion on here and give that try.

Whenever I detect a buildup of product I do an apple cider vinegar rinse and that helps to snap everything back into shape. You make a valid point about the natural products! To be honest, there's only been one or two that I actually like and that was the Alba botanicals.

[lapushka]

queenofheartz44, there are a few people on here with relaxed hair. If you can't handle your natural texture, it is a way of dealing with it, I suppose. I remember when I was a teen. I was convinced that I had straight hair and kept treating it that way - when it in fact was wavy. That's not ideal either. I have come to accept my texture, but I'm not tightly curly; a different "beast" altogether. Anyway, it's not nice of people to comment on the fact that you chose to relax, it is in fact none of their business. I hope you can find many tips on here to make your life easier still with handling your hair! Good luck!!!