Fuzzy toddler hair help!

[raingirl]

I am at a loss. My daughter has a problem with the hair at the back of her head and it's always a rats nest, fuzzy and matted even an hour after I combed it out. She's 20 months old and it's not easy to get her to stay still as it is to comb it!

She has inherited my thin/fine hair. All the hair on her head is fine except the back where it rubs on chairs or the bed when she's laying down. The car ride to/from daycare each day makes it so bad when she rubs her head on the car seat, even though it's a 10 min drive!

I've tried all this:
-coconut, almond, mineral oils - no luck unless it's heavily oiled, like a tablespoon in her short 2 inch hair.
-kids detangler sprays - works when it's wet but as soon as it dries, it tangles again.
-"It's a 10" miracle leave in - works when it's wet but as soon as it dries, it tangles again.
-Live Clean argan oil hair cream - left a film on her hair but didn't help with tangles
-leaving in conditioner - no help, just made her hair sticky.

She currently only gets a bath twice a week and we CO her hair with Live Clean conditioner. Her hair seems to suck up whatever I put in it and tangles tangles tangles. I've looked and there aren't any split ends or damage that I can see.

Thoughts?? I feel like such a bad mom that I can't figure this out. I cringe what day care must think of me when she's a hairdresser on the side!

[Night_Kitten]

If trying to fix the problem by concentrating on her hair isn't working, perhaps concentrating on the other factor (the surfaces her hair rubs against) could help?
Is it a possibility to cover the bed / pillow, chair backs and car seat head with a slippery fabric (silk / satin)? I'm thinking that maybe if her hair doesn't come in contact with rough surfaces, it won't tangle as much...

[lapushka]

Can you put it in piggietails or a pony yet? Or is it waaay too short for things like that?

[Obsidian]

I'm wearing my hair short right now and I experience the same tangling in the back. Its from getting rubbed on fabrics, you should see how bad it is in the mornings from my pillow. Covering everything you can with silk/satin will help.

[Anje]

How about a hair serum, straight up silicone? A little should go a long way to keeping tangles down.

Edit: I agree with the suggestions to try some satin fabric. Sew some onto the back of her car seat, things like that. Satin pillowcase if she uses a pillow (I have no idea what age kids get to start using them). Pigtails if she'll leave then in (I remember that I never did).

[missrandie]

What about covering the top of the car seat with satin or silk? Also anywhere else she lays down?

I've found that my hair fuzzes and yucks up whenever I rub up against rougher fabrics.

[Nadine <3]

I like the idea of covering surfaces with silk/satin! I think when I was that age my hair was always just a mess though...kids don't really go out of their way to keep their hair nice so it gets messed and tangled fast!

[Ambystoma]

My son has the same problem, he has his Dad's super fine, straight hair. I had moderate success with using oil as a detangler but what really helped us was good old silicones - I use the same stuff on him as me, Garnier Sleek and Shine shampoo and conditioner. Thankfully his scalp tolerates sulphates unlike mine so I can just use a small amount of the shampoo diluted with a little water straight onto his head, so we don't have build up issues. I add a tiny little dot of the matching silicone serum to the back of his head too where the tangles tend to happen, and these days it's so much easier to care for, the tangles are less snarly and I can get most of them out very quickly with just finger combing, and any that are a little worse just slide out when I fingercomb conditioner through while washing. He's 16 months old and very wriggly usually but he loves having his hair washed which helps, he seems to find the scalp stroking soothing.

Good luck!

[Unicorn]

While you're trying these solutions, (hope you find something that works) bear in mind that this is quite normal for toddlers of this age. It doesn't make you a bad Mom in any way shape or form. All it means is she is a normal mini-human who is subject to the same physical laws as other mini-humans, as well as a fair few full grown ones. I can't count how many toddlers I've seen with hair like this. Some just go bald in that patch that rubs on every thing others keep the hair, but it goes frizzy.

The staff at day care will have seen this too, especially with finer hair, it doesn't reflect on you in any way.

Unicorn

[Gamma Vector]

Okay, this is going to sound really weird, but stay with me. My little sister had this exact same issue as a baby, and my mother came up with a solution. She used a little bit of silicone-based lube in my sister's hair. Solved the problem completely. She would put some in her palm and rub her hands together to warm it up a bit, then gently wipe it onto my sister's hair like a leave-in serum. Came out just fine with baby shampoo, and kept it from matting up all day. It would still tangle a little, but it brushed out easy. Weird, but it worked.

[lapushka]

Lube is not such a bad idea, it's a good "serum alternative". Lots of CG curlies know it (the silicone-free version).

[truepeacenik]

Okay, this is going to sound really weird, but stay with me. My little sister had this exact same issue as a baby, and my mother came up with a solution. She used a little bit of silicone-based lube in my sister's hair. Solved the problem completely. She would put some in her palm and rub her hands together to warm it up a bit, then gently wipe it onto my sister's hair like a leave-in serum. Came out just fine with baby shampoo, and kept it from matting up all day. It would still tangle a little, but it brushed out easy. Weird, but it worked.

First, I would have done this. Carried in the diaper backpack and all.
Secondly, how did this come up?
How did sister react?
And can I come to dinner with your family? Just to listen?

[brickworld13]

First, I would have done this. Carried in the diaper backpack and all.
Secondly, how did this come up?
How did sister react?
And can I come to dinner with your family? Just to listen?

I agree. That is an ingenious solution. Can I come to dinner too?

[Anje]

Lube is not such a bad idea, it's a good "serum alternative". Lots of CG curlies know it (the silicone-free version).

Yep, silicone lube is pretty much the same thing as silicone serum. Plus, you know it's pretty safe ingredient-wise, given what it's for. :D

[jeanniet]

While you're trying these solutions, (hope you find something that works) bear in mind that this is quite normal for toddlers of this age. It doesn't make you a bad Mom in any way shape or form. All it means is she is a normal mini-human who is subject to the same physical laws as other mini-humans, as well as a fair few full grown ones. I can't count how many toddlers I've seen with hair like this. Some just go bald in that patch that rubs on every thing others keep the hair, but it goes frizzy.

The staff at day care will have seen this too, especially with finer hair, it doesn't reflect on you in any way.

Unicorn

Yes, this. Very, very typical for babies and toddlers because their hair is generally so fine. Believe me, daycare isn't batting an eye at it!