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View Full Version : I want a trim but terrified of getting a cut instead. I'm Phobic of salons now.



msthinhair
May 18th, 2015, 01:43 PM
People growing out their hair might understand this complaint.
I'm very short under 5'0". My hair is very long and I have been growing it since Oct 2011 after I cut it to my chin from being long.

However, when I ask for a trim at the salon, I get 1-3 inches taken off. This has happened multiple times by multiple hair stylists. One hair stylist suggested I cut my hair short because "It's weighing you down..." I said I'm not interested yet she proceeded to cut it a few inches shorter. I'm pretty shy so I didn't want to comment on it.

Why do some hair stylist insist on cutting my long locks shorter than I request? What can I do if they do this again? :mad:

It's hard to prove especially if they style my hair afterward. I haven't had a trim since Dec 2014, after a stylist that I've been to prior cut about 1.5 inches of my hair.

Thanks for the advice in advance!

Nadine <3
May 18th, 2015, 01:51 PM
WHy not buy a shears and learn to trim yourself? That's what I do, I always get the cut I want.

lunalocks
May 18th, 2015, 01:58 PM
People have posted that having a barber trim their hair is not only cheaper but the barber actually takes off only what you want. Others have said show exactly with your fingers how much you want taken off. Our idea of an inch and a hairdressers idea of an inch can be different! I think they take it as an approximate.

Some hairdressers think they know best for you and therefore do things you have not agreed on. They will make your hem thinner so it is softer (I found THAT out by observing my daughter's haircut), use heat or products you may not want on your hair, and hot water to wash or high heat when they blow dry. You can even ask them to not blow dry. Make sure, right upfront, exactly what you want and do not want them to do.

msthinhair
May 18th, 2015, 02:00 PM
I would if I could. My hair is in layers right now. http://i59.tinypic.com/im5hlw.jpg

lapushka
May 18th, 2015, 02:39 PM
Do you actually want to maintain the layers or cut a small bit off from the bottom? I don't think it looks wrong or anything... why not just keep growing. It doesn't look like it needs a trim, TBH. :shrug:

msthinhair
May 18th, 2015, 02:47 PM
Do you actually want to maintain the layers or cut a small bit off from the bottom? I don't think it looks wrong or anything... why not just keep growing. It doesn't look like it needs a trim, TBH. :shrug:

Thanks! I wouldn't mind maintaing the layers but I'm too paranoid because I think they cut off too much when they do it.
What's the longest you've gone without a trim?

lapushka
May 18th, 2015, 03:09 PM
Thanks! I wouldn't mind maintaing the layers but I'm too paranoid because I think they cut off too much when they do it.
What's the longest you've gone without a trim?

It's been since November 2013 since I last had a trim. :)

Sarahlabyrinth
May 18th, 2015, 03:16 PM
Maybe you could learn to cut your own layers - there are folks here who do and have no trouble. Then you would control how much you cut off.

MychelleC
May 18th, 2015, 03:28 PM
Go to a good stylist recommended by someone you know. Ask women on the street whose hair you admire who their stylist is. Go in for a consult, not a cut. Talk with the stylist and bring in pictures of what you like so there is very clear communication between you. It's entirely possible to get regular trims and grow or maintain your length.

hennalonghair
May 18th, 2015, 03:36 PM
WHy not buy a shears and learn to trim yourself? That's what I do, I always get the cut I want.


Maybe you could learn to cut your own layers - there are folks here who do and have no trouble. Then you would control how much you cut off.
I've been just where you are and agree that the best thing to do is cut it yourself.
Learning to self trim means you are no longer a slave to your hairdresser. Your hair is in your own hands.
I've cut layers out but if it's any consolation your hair doesn't look in need of one. I'd leave it for another few months and then it will be at a better length to trim.
I'll NEVER go to another hairdresser in my life and my hair always has a nice blunt cut.

Doreen
May 18th, 2015, 03:43 PM
Self-trim is an option like Sarahlabyrinth said, but if you're not into the idea you might want to look at reviews online of stylists in your area. They can be revealing as to whether the person is a little bit scissor-happy. If you are comfortable revealing your general location, you could consider making a thread on here like "Any longhairs in ____ area who have a stylist they love? PM me" or along those lines.

LongCurlyTress
May 18th, 2015, 03:53 PM
Something else you can do to self trim is use the white Creaclip on your back. You do need someone else to pull it down through your hair straight on your back, but it will give you a slight curve in your hemline. My DH pulls it down the back of my wet hair after I comb through it and get out the tangles and then he hands the Creaclip to me over my shoulder so I can trim my hair. I might try Hennalonghair's trimming technique in December when I am due for my next trim. ;)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a0LJ-eSUUSc

Mammasaurusrex
May 18th, 2015, 03:53 PM
It looks healthy!! You've got great length =] there is a thread around here about not trimming, I think it's called No Trim 2015? Something along those lines. It is fun to read the posts and see what everyone says about maintaining healthy hair without having to trim it.

Obsidian
May 18th, 2015, 04:00 PM
I think its important to give a hair stylist the exact amount you want cut off. Saying you want a trim might mean different things to different people. Last time my daughter came to me for a trim, I chopped off 4" of horribly dry, ratty ends. She didn't want that much cut but she didn't specify how much, just to trim up the ends. That exactly what I did even if she didn't see it that way.

Betazed
May 18th, 2015, 05:14 PM
msthinhair, I'm in exactly the same position you are. I need to trim off a bunch of heat damage but I'm terrified of having too much chopped off. There's a new salon in my area (new to me, that is) and I've gone twice to get a trim and backed out before I even made it in the doors! I've tried other salons in my area and have had all but one take off more than 3 inches when I specifically said no more than half an inch! The last one I went to was alright but I still didn't feel like I trusted the stylist enough to go back. While she didn't cut too much off the last time I had a trim (which was back in Dec. 2014), she made her opinion well known that she should've been cutting off a lot more. She wasn't exactly rude but I felt like she wanted to be. Does that make any sense?

I've toyed with the idea of learning to trim myself but thus far, I'm too afraid to even try. I have a good pair of shears that I use on my DH's hair. Is it weird that I trust myself to cut his hair but not my own? :p Although, the first time I cut his hair I was only 17 and completely terrified I'd screw it up. It turned out ok and I've only gotten better at it as the years have progressed but cutting his hair and my own feel like two completely different things.

msthinhair
May 18th, 2015, 06:22 PM
Thanks to everyone who replied. Now, I need to figure out what my hair type is. It's not straight that's for sure. I was born with loose curls and it got straighter over time.
I'm going to try going a year without a trim and see where that takes me. A guy used a razor on my hair spring 2014 and took off about 3 inches, that took awhile to recover.

endlessly
May 18th, 2015, 08:02 PM
I've been in your shoes and unfortunately, not speaking up has resulted in many haircut disasters. Even though you're shy, try to be assertive. Tell them exactly what you want and then just to make absolutely certain they understand, show them how much you want cut off. After they make the initial cut, have them actually show you what they cut off and if it's too much, you can ask to see their supervisor and demand your service is free or you can opt to just leave.

I don't trust stylists at all mainly because they always cut more, my most recent salon visit was to finally remove choppy layers put in nearly 5 years ago and she didn't even cut it evenly, so I ended up having to trim it myself. I support those commenting that you should learn to trim it yourself since you're pretty much guaranteed to get the type of cut you want. But, if you need to visit a salon, just remember that they're working for you, it isn't the other way around. While sometimes it's nice to get their opinions, they don't have any right to force you to cut more than you want.

elea
May 18th, 2015, 08:16 PM
If it just a tiny trim you need to get ride of poking-out split ends you can:
wait till your hair need a wash (is easier because it forms locks from the root for you)
put a small bit of the hair in front of you (you can see the ends at your length)
grab a small strands of the same size
snip the very very tiniest bit at the end that is needed
work through that bit and clip (tiny tiny snips at the time, not even 1/4 of cm)
do the same with the rest of your hair
It will get ride of the damaged end without chopping in nor wrecking your layers.
Otherwise, that search and destroy some do.
If you do not need a trim: leave it alone and hunt for a good, understanding and recommended hair-dresser.

HintOfMint
May 19th, 2015, 11:13 PM
Layers are tough to do yourself. The Crea Clip works to an extent, but it may not result in the kind of layers you want. It's the reason why I don't cut my hair at home.

I would dive into Yelp. Look for hairdressers who are known to follow instructions to a T. Contrary to the horror stories, it's not impossible to find a trustworthy hairdresser who will listen to what you want and not chop off your hair.

Scarlet_Heart
May 20th, 2015, 05:59 AM
I have my type A, engineer husband trim mine. I tell him an inch to 1.5" straight across the bottom and he does exactly that. I'll wash it and he'll comb it straight and then do it.

Is there someone you could trust to do that?

Darrin
May 20th, 2015, 07:35 AM
People growing out their hair might understand this complaint.
I'm very short under 5'0". My hair is very long and I have been growing it since Oct 2011 after I cut it to my chin from being long.

However, when I ask for a trim at the salon, I get 1-3 inches taken off. This has happened multiple times by multiple hair stylists. One hair stylist suggested I cut my hair short because "It's weighing you down..." I said I'm not interested yet she proceeded to cut it a few inches shorter. I'm pretty shy so I didn't want to comment on it.

Why do some hair stylist insist on cutting my long locks shorter than I request? What can I do if they do this again? :mad:

It's hard to prove especially if they style my hair afterward. I haven't had a trim since Dec 2014, after a stylist that I've been to prior cut about 1.5 inches of my hair.

Thanks for the advice in advance!


I understand your concerns. I would get an actual recommendation from someone with nice long hair. Ask this person who trims their hair? This is what I did when I had to find an new hair stylist. When you go to the stylist, be very specific about how much you want trimmed. If you want a 1/2 inch, say I want a 1/2 inch trimmed off my ends straight across the bottom. Sunsailing a man who posts to this site sometimes, suggests once you find a good stylist that you stick with them and tip them well. No need to rush your trim, until you find someone you can trust.

Good Luck,

Darrin

lapushka
May 20th, 2015, 07:40 AM
Thanks to everyone who replied. Now, I need to figure out what my hair type is. It's not straight that's for sure. I was born with loose curls and it got straighter over time.
I'm going to try going a year without a trim and see where that takes me. A guy used a razor on my hair spring 2014 and took off about 3 inches, that took awhile to recover.

The no trimming 2015 thread welcomes you!
http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=126267

Also layers can be done yourself, by using the compact cut method for layers. There's one technique, and 2 variations on that technique. Basically, you make a ponytail. You can make one on the top of your head (and snip a bit off) for longer layers, or you can make one on the top of your forehead / hairline (and snip a bit off) for short layers. My hair is trimmed according to this last variation and my layers go from BSL+ to TBL+ but I wouldn't recommend it if you have hair shorter than BSL, or the layers might end up being too short!

Darrin
May 20th, 2015, 07:48 AM
I found this link. http://hair.allwomenstalk.com/keys-to-finding-a-good-hairdresser/5/ These are all good tips.

Scarlet_Heart
May 20th, 2015, 10:22 AM
I used to cut my own layers by, while wet, combing all the hair straight - away from the back of my head. I did this while bent over with my torso perpendicular to the floor. Then I would cut straight across, all around my head. Kind of a crazy method, but I got some wild layers that way.

Pat Wright
May 20th, 2015, 01:43 PM
I have a phobia about stylists. Every time I have went something went horribly wrong!

Carolyn
May 20th, 2015, 02:53 PM
I agree with the person who said get a recommendation from someone whose hair you admire. Don't ask for just the name of the salon, ask the name of the person who trims her hair. Call and ask for a consult. Tell her you have some horrendously awful cuts and want to keep your hair long. Tell her who recommended her. Be specific in your hair goals. Don't be afraid to speak up and say what you want. When you do go for a trim and you love it, like Sunsailing says, tip well. At least 20% or even 25%. I've had excellent luck with stylists at Aveda salons. It seems to be that the stylists have very good training and they are schooled in good client/stylist relations. That means discussing what the clients wants before anything is done and also discussing hair goals. I've been to 3 different Aveda salons and over the years have been to 6 different stylists. All have done exactly what I asked and I left the salon a very happy camper.

Alien Girl
May 21st, 2015, 04:23 AM
I usually show how much with my fingers, not by saying how many inches. The past two times I've gone to a salon, they never cut more than I wanted. The last time I went to a nice salon, the lady BARELY took off length but did a very nice trim. She said that she was going to "trim, but not take off length." Of course a tiny bit of length was lost, but it was hardly noticeable.

vega
May 21st, 2015, 04:34 AM
I prefer going to a salon to trim my hair , that way I know it's done properly and beineglect in long run in my experience ruined my hair , just be clear how much you want cut off