Top Knot or Bust. Cheers from Seattle!

[kittenattack]

Hi guys, I'm hoping you can help me through the lulls. A tiny backstory about me. Had a difficult weekend pacing back and forth in the middle of a panic attack. Seriously, terrible, I couldn't snap myself out or distract myself because all I can think is I can no longer participate in such cyclical never-ending unhappy with myself behavior dying my hair red. I started dying my hair on and off in 6th grade. Stopped Junior Year. Senior Year had the most beautiful shade of dirty blonde. And then died it fresh man year in college. Till now at 32. I'm 2 months cold turkey.

I'm Naturally dirty blonde. I look back at pictures during my senior year in high school and think wow. I had gorgeous hair. Seriously beautiful hair. I was looking back on pictures from the last 10 years and every one is a weird neon shade of red. Only once and a while looking good. People would say you look like a natural red head. People would look at my roots and say passive aggressively do you dye your hair IOW you need a touch up. I'm just really sick if it. The last time i dyed my hair two months ago I was going for a natural shad of red, like dirty blonde strawberry. No sir turned bright candy apple red. Thankfully it faded sorta but the end result is the same, that I'm fed up. But still. I'm almost 2 months in. 1 inch of growth. Boo. My hair grew so much faster when I wasn't staring at it all day.

Got my hair in a top knot because I can't even stand the sight of it anymore. The thought of dyeing it anymore freaks me out, the thought of going through the most painful ugly duckling year of my life is pretty rotten.

Red dyed on blonde, I really can't think of a more painful grow out.

OY.

[kittenattack]

I was going to post a pic. But I don't have permissions yet. Maybe later.

[Remi]

Hi kittenattack, and welcome to the forum! Everything will be alright. Go through and find posts about others dying their hair and ask a lot of questions, I think there are a lot of other members who have gone through the same thing. Really. There are lots of people here who can help. :)

[kittenattack]

Thanks Remi. Do you mean dying there already dyed parts a better color? Red is from what I read a really hard color to get out. Kinda my stance on the worst grow out ever.

[kittenattack]

My hair growth regimen I'm starting this week.

-Biotin
-Folic Acid
-Vitamin C
-Oil Treatments before wash
-Daily Scalp Massages
-Yoga
-Running

[two_wheels]

Welcome!
I feel your pain... I stopped dying my own dark blonde hair in 2011. Pixie in Jan 2012 and here I am (see my sig pic). Now I am finally getting there. You will too :)
This thread (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=51155) will be of interest!

[Quasiquixotic]

I did something similar to this last year. I went from collarbone with hendigo'd hair to near BSL now. My roots are to my chin. Once I could put my hair up it was much better. Put it up and forget about it. You can do this. You'll look back in a year and be pleased. And the red will probably fade a little and you'll end up with a fun Ombre eventually.

:grouphug:

[Kitten1030]

Kitten to kitten, I welcome you. Good game plan. Throw it up in a top knot, treat it well but don't obsess,and like Quasi said in a year you will be happy you did it. I will have to do this eventually myself and let my hendigo peacefully go to gray. I will be happy to not have to dye my hair anymore. Just think how great that will be to not be a slave to hair color.

[cat11]

Hi kittenattack :) I dyed my hair for years- mostly black, stopped for a bit, bleached and did fun colors, dyed black, let it fade, dyed to match my roots to my hair (I really reccommend this, makes the demarkation less obvious!!!) and now Ive been rowing for 2.5 years..... you can do it!!! Just put it up and forget like Quasixixotic (sp? sorry) said. Itll fade and wont be as noticeable. How long is your hair? With regular trimming the dye will go away and still let you get length. As long as you baby dyed ends, youll be fine!! Just remember your final goal when you get frustrated, and never do anything that will move you further away from it. Good luck and welcome!!

[LadyLorien]

Aw, :( I'm sorry to hear you have had a few bumps on your hair journey already (not actual hair-bumps, but who knows, maybe that is applicable as well). I wish you the best on your hair journey and I hope things get better over time! Cheers!

[cocoahair]

Welcome! So glad you joined! When you have posting permission be sure to post pics to document your progress:)

[kittenattack]

Thanks guys. I will post pics as soon as I'm able. Told my boyfriend what has been bothering me for a while finally. And I can kinda tell he isn't happy. I wish I hadn't told him so soon because I am having a rough time coming to terms with the next year. I of course want him to think I'm pretty. I just want him to understand how I feel about myself right now. Besides needing to see a doctor about my anxiety and depression. My hair thing is just another thing that makes me feel trapped in a way. His reaction kinda put me on the defense, when I was really expecting support.

[truepeacenik]

Your health is more important than hair. Even on this site. Go for that first,the rest will follow.

What's the attraction to red, for you?

[kittenattack]

I'm very fair skinned. I brings a pop of color i guess. I like subtlety though. And home dye out of a box is not that subtle. Even when the picture and name of the dye like natural strawberry blonde. LOl. That was the last box of hair dye I used. And that was a catastrophe.

[kittenattack]

So. Still not able to post a pic. But here is an update, hopefully might help anyone else with a dark auburn color on dirty blonde grow out. So I dyed my hair from a box my whole life, not really looking great, but once you start you can't stop. Except I did feb or march. I had about 1 inch of dirty blonde grow out, and one inch of hot roots looked like light strawberry blonde and then 12 inches of dark auburn. I honestly couldn't proceed with just a grow out, i work in the fashion industry. I couldn't do this grow out for the next 2 years on not expect it to effect my carreer. So I came to terms with the fact that I will get there, but I need to blend this auburn into the dirty blonde. I sought out the best cheapest hair stylist with 13 years experience, and asked her opinion of what my options were. She suggested I do baby fine foils with strawberry blonde to blend the auburn to dirty blonde. I had it done about a month ago and it blended perfectly and the grow out is great. She said just come in how often as i want. So I'm going to wait another month or two I think and then start doing some balayage where the highlight the bottoms, so it just looks like cool hombre effect but not so dip dye. I've seen several girls before and after who have done this approach to growing out dark colors and they have all been successful. Ya, hope this helps someone panicking from the ugly duckling year deppression. It doesn't have to be so bad, my hair actually looks pretty good blended, more natural.