For those of you who have really had or have hairloss

[mamaherrera]

I need some consolation and some advice, as I'm at a loss. Starting five years ago, I've always feared hairloss because I was having major sheds for a long time. And in that time, I began to measure my ponytail circumference to keep track and it really kept me strong throughout the shedding because it never changed. It was always 3.75" Last year I had a baby and it went up a little bit, like 3.9" (estimation). I didn't have a major shed after the baby, just normal "high" shedding and 9 months after my baby was born it went down to 3.75" all ok. But now over a year after having her, I'm having the lowest shedding of my life, so it has bestrucked me and I'm crying as to why now my ponytail circumference has dropped by 1/8" and I see no reason for it, no shedding. A month ago, it was still at 3.75. Just wondering if others who have had hairloss have had it without a big shed. With such low shedding, I was so confident that maybe it was going to improve, and to the contrary. Thank you.

[Jenn_Ivan]

I don't know if you straighten your hair at all. But, I've noticed that if I measure the circumference of my hair after I've straightened it, it is always thinner than if I measure it when I haven't straightened it. It goes down by a whole half an inch. Not sure if that might be the case for you but I just thought I'd add that in there as a possibility because I know it happens for me.

[mamaherrera]

I do appreciate that Jenn. I sure hope it could be something like that. I did wear it "curly" yesterday and then I had it wrapped in a bun overnight, for sleeping, don't know how much that could "straighten" it out. I appreciate you sharing that, that's a big difference, too, .5 inch, so it helps me put things in perspective. a big hug out to ya! the only thing is I used to measure in the past the "next day" after having my hair in a braid, and it didn't affect the measurement, so even though I would love to think it's that, I don't think it is.

[Panth]

Mamaherrera, no matter how many threads you make or how many times you post the same question, we are not going to be able to tell you anything more about your shedding.

I'm sorry, but I really think you should stop obsessing over this. Or, perhaps, try to figure out why you're so obsessed by it. :flower:

[lapushka]

Mamaherrera, no matter how many threads you make or how many times you post the same question, we are not going to be able to tell you anything more about your shedding.

I'm sorry, but I really think you should stop obsessing over this. Or, perhaps, try to figure out why you're so obsessed by it. :flower:

Exactly this. :agree: I'm *really* sorry for being so blunt, but every thread you make is about some kind of thinning or hair loss, and bald patches or supposedly "excessive" scalp cleavage that appear not to be any problem at all. I really hope you get some help on this, because it seems to occur in cycles. If you had no shedding, then your circ is "safe". You might have just mis-measured in the past. Why not simply draw that conclusion and be done with it - see that's where you can't let it go and where the problem is.

TBH, I was actually wondering where you where, and was just thinking about another post like this. ;)

[gwenalyn]

I was compiling a list of non-shedding related reasons ponytail circumference can change the other day, and came up with these so far:

different products make hair compact more/less
different products (i.e. henna) "coat" hair and make each strand thicker, thus increasing ponytail circumference
straight hair compacts more, curly hair compacts less
weather (esp. for curlies/wavies)
hydration of hair (more hydration increases the mass/weight, so it might increase the thickness? Not sure about this one.)
clean vs. dirty--my hair compacts more when greasy
cutting in bangs and short layers
breakage close to the scalp
wrapping the measuring tape/string more loosely or tightly
normal variance in measuring
other things I haven't thought of yet


Point being, ponytail circumference is a helpful estimate but not the most accurate measurement for hair thickness. 1/8" of an inch from 3.75 inches is almost nothing! You still have higher-than-average thickness. Don't worry!

[Sarahlabyrinth]

Exactly this. :agree: I'm *really* sorry for being so blunt, but every thread you make is about some kind of thinning or hair loss, and bald patches or supposedly "excessive" scalp cleavage that appear not to be any problem at all. I really hope you get some help on this, because it seems to occur in cycles. If you had no shedding, then your circ is "safe". You might have just mis-measured in the past. Why not simply draw that conclusion and be done with it - see that's where you can't let it go and where the problem is.

TBH, I was actually wondering where you where, and was just thinking about another post like this. ;)I agree with this. If you are not shedding much, then you cannot be losing hair! Please stop measuring, worrying and fretting yourself miserable over your hair! It is thicker than most! Be grateful and enjoy what you have. :)

[mamaherrera]

Thanks Gwenalyn, I truly hope it is one of those. I've been using coffee rinses, and someone had said it makes their hair softer/slicker, perhaps that is what is making my hair compact more. I can just tell. Like I usually can do three wraps with the elastic band, but the third one is hard to do and now, it's super easy. And I've measured it off and on for the last six years, sometimes freshly washed, sometimes, the opposite and it always measured the same. The only big change is with the coffee rinses. but I also see more of those super fine "SHORT" shed hairs that are just not my normal texture at all, (since I don't shed much at all, all I see are the thin hairs) so I don't know if my new regrowth is coming in thinner, thus, making it less dense. I hope it's one of those "benign" things you have on the list and I appreciate your thoughtfulness and positivity and you are right 1/8 is very little, I just don't get it. Here I was hoping it would grow since I'm not shedding!! Thanks, big hugs to all!

[divinedobbie]

3.75" is super thick hair. 1/8" of an inch is nothing. Don't keep stressing about it.

You could very well be shedding and not be noticing it. I would assume that a 1 year old would keep you very busy and you wouldn't be paying as much attention to when your hair strands are falling out.

[hennalonghair]

Mamaherrera, no matter how many threads you make or how many times you post the same question, we are not going to be able to tell you anything more about your shedding.

I'm sorry, but I really think you should stop obsessing over this. Or, perhaps, try to figure out why you're so obsessed by it. :flower:


Exactly this. :agree: I'm *really* sorry for being so blunt, but every thread you make is about some kind of thinning or hair loss, and bald patches or supposedly "excessive" scalp cleavage that appear not to be any problem at all. I really hope you get some help on this, because it seems to occur in cycles. If you had no shedding, then your circ is "safe". You might have just mis-measured in the past. Why not simply draw that conclusion and be done with it - see that's where you can't let it go and where the problem is.

TBH, I was actually wondering where you where, and was just thinking about another post like this. ;)


I agree with this. If you are not shedding much, then you cannot be losing hair! Please stop measuring, worrying and fretting yourself miserable over your hair! It is thicker than most! Be grateful and enjoy what you have. :)

Yes. I have to agree with these people. It's become so predicable now. I knew what this thread was going to be about before I even clicked on it. No matter how much you appreciate and acknowledge all the help and info you get from your consistent questioning it's obvious that it does you no good at all because they are always the same questions concerning hair loss.
I sincerely hope you get some help for this because it's not healthy.
Just sayin' :shrug:

[browneyedsusan]

I love you to pieces, mamaherrera, and you've got to stop treating yourself so badly. You're fixating on this imaginary, negative thing too much. It isn't good for you. Find something else to do. Visit the gym. Work on your nails. Quit this ruminating on the hair. Not good for you! Take better care of yourself. :blossom:

FWIW: I'd give my right arm for that kind of pony measurement! (I've never measured mine, but I can tell by eyeballing, that it's not even close to 4". Never measured the length either. I don't count sheds. None of that. For me, that is a slippery slope to fixation and then obsession. I don't care to make that trip. :lala: )

[slynr]

FWIW: I'd give my right arm for that kind of pony measurement! (I've never measured mine, but I can tell by eyeballing, that it's not even close to 4". Never measured the length either. I don't count sheds. None of that. For me, that is a slippery slope to fixation and then obsession. I don't care to make that trip. :lala: )

So much this. These are wise words. I'll never have thick hair and just make the best out of what I do have. I try to treat my hair gently, eat well, get good sleep, exercise. Beyond that there isnt much I can do. I am afraid the day I start counting sheds is the day I wind up in the corner rocking back and forth. I dont want to make that trip either, browneyedsusan. You said that so well and I believe the same thing!!

[picklepie]

Mama, I know you've gotten good info about the hair issue. But I also want you to know-- postpartum anxiety is REAL, it happens a LOT, and there are ways to treat it. Support groups for new mamas can help a ton, but more focused help is available as well. Short term course of medication, talk therapy, are things that have helped many people. I know I'm just reading between the lines, but I've been there, and it sucks. For your family's sake, and your own, it's worth exploring. Talk to your doctor. You deserve to live without this anxiety! (Gentle hugs if they are welcome).

[renarok]

I went from a 4" ponytail to a 2.8" ponytail in 5 months. I filled a quart size baggie in 10 days to take to my doctor who didn't take me seriously. I needed to have my thyroid meds adjusted. I didn't post on here once about it. Well I guess now I have..... it has been a year and my hair is back to about 3.75". Hair thickness changes for lots of reasons.
If you are worried see a doctor :horse:

[chen bao jun]

Mama Herrera I got some help for OCD and clinical anxiety, did therapy and medication, life is so much nicer with out the worrying about issues that just are not real. Please follow the good advice given on this thread by those of us that have seen your previous posts. You are going through needless suffering a nd this kind of issue isn't shameful. it's a brain chemical glitch. if it was migraines you wouldn't hesitate to seek help, would you?

[Wosie]

Mama Herrera I got some help for OCD and clinical anxiety, did therapy and medication, life is so much nicer with out the worrying about issues that just are not real. Please follow the good advice given on this thread by those of us that have seen your previous posts. You are going through needless suffering a nd this kind of issue isn't shameful. it's a brain chemical glitch. if it was migraines you wouldn't hesitate to seek help, would you?

This rings so true! Me without anti-depressants is an incredibly depressed and anxiety-ridden person, with tons of insecurities and 'brain glitches'. Taking these pills (Lexapro) has turned my world around and I feel so much better now. I could barely exist before. Have you ever talked about your worries with a psychologist, mamaherrera?

[mindwiped]

The easy third wrap with your ponytail holder...The elastic has stretched out. Your hair may be just as thick but the elastic has weakened enough to make that wrap easier.

[spidermom]

Simple solution - stop measuring your hair circumference.

When I was a new member, I measured mine several times, with measurements ranging from about 3.8 to 4.2 for no particular reason. Length measurements varied also, but I'm sure my hair wasn't growing longer, then shrinking up, then growing longer, then .....

Tape measures lie. Pay no attention.

[Yarrow]

Thanks Gwenalyn, I truly hope it is one of those. I've been using coffee rinses, and someone had said it makes their hair softer/slicker, perhaps that is what is making my hair compact more. I can just tell. Like I usually can do three wraps with the elastic band, but the third one is hard to do and now, it's super easy. And I've measured it off and on for the last six years, sometimes freshly washed, sometimes, the opposite and it always measured the same. The only big change is with the coffee rinses. but I also see more of those super fine "SHORT" shed hairs that are just not my normal I I texture at all, (since I don't shed much at all, all I see are the thin hairs) so I don't know if my new regrowth is coming in thinner, thus, making it less dense. I hope it's one of those "benign" things you have on the list and I appreciate your thoughtfulness and positivity and you are right 1/8 is very little, I just don't get it. Here I was hoping it would grow since I'm not shedding!! Thanks, big hugs to all!
There really is not a lot you can do about it. You can get a medical checkup and see if you have any deficiencies.
But other than that, you can try to get the most of your life, living as stress less as possible, balanced diet, exercise, that's about all. But if your shedding less now, maybe you had these hairs all along but just didn't notice them because you were concentrating on the longer, more visible shed hairs.
If your going through AGA or female pattern baldness, you would experience a more drastic decrease and it would be noticeable, you would have to go to a doctor and proceed from there.
So just concentrate on other things than hair thickness and if you can't do anything hair related without obsessing, take a break from hair stuff and concentrate on something more joyful and wholesome.

[mamaherrera]

I think everyone is correct on both ends. But I think I am so wanting to "not" have an issue, that I believe in any little small change possible, like "stretched elastic" and such. I really want it to all be ok. But now even my husband has said, if this ponytail size keeps going down, you are going to lose your hair. Because it had gone down a bit a few months ago, and now a bit more. spiderMOM. I appreciate your sharing about the fact that your ponytail can change, that does give me some hope because right now, my husband just coldly says "you're losing your hair, face it and get on with it." I really hope and pray it is just a small variance or I don't know what it could be. But yes, your words all give me comfort, and perhaps I do need some anxiety meds, I don't disagree or ignore such advice. But I guess, it's harder for me now because my husband is saying "with the little 'bald spots' he has seen, like he says, where I'm missing like 2-3 hairs in my part, and with the drop in the pony, you're going to lose your hair." Accept it. And I guess I don't know if it's an OCD issue or if I'm just struggling with the "acceptance" process. right now, I'm at a loss of words, my husband has always kept my hope going so strong, he's always said, "as long as the ponytail cir. stays the same, don't worry." and now look! I appreciate all the advice, suggestions, and such. I did try a psychologist once.

[Panth]

I think everyone is correct on both ends. But I think I am so wanting to "not" have an issue, that I believe in any little small change possible, like "stretched elastic" and such. I really want it to all be ok. But now even my husband has said, if this ponytail size keeps going down, you are going to lose your hair. Because it had gone down a bit a few months ago, and now a bit more. spiderMOM. I appreciate your sharing about the fact that your ponytail can change, that does give me some hope because right now, my husband just coldly says "you're losing your hair, face it and get on with it." I really hope and pray it is just a small variance or I don't know what it could be. But yes, your words all give me comfort, and perhaps I do need some anxiety meds, I don't disagree or ignore such advice. But I guess, it's harder for me now because my husband is saying "with the little 'bald spots' he has seen, like he says, where I'm missing like 2-3 hairs in my part, and with the drop in the pony, you're going to lose your hair." Accept it. And I guess I don't know if it's an OCD issue or if I'm just struggling with the "acceptance" process. right now, I'm at a loss of words, my husband has always kept my hope going so strong, he's always said, "as long as the ponytail cir. stays the same, don't worry." and now look! I appreciate all the advice, suggestions, and such. I did try a psychologist once.

mamaherrera, I'm really sorry, but you are not having hair loss. Or, at least as far as you have said:


I need some consolation and some advice, as I'm at a loss. Starting five years ago, I've always feared hairloss because I was having major sheds for a long time. And in that time, I began to measure my ponytail circumference to keep track and it really kept me strong throughout the shedding because it never changed. It was always 3.75" Last year I had a baby and it went up a little bit, like 3.9" (estimation). I didn't have a major shed after the baby, just normal "high" shedding and 9 months after my baby was born it went down to 3.75" all ok. But now over a year after having her, I'm having the lowest shedding of my life, so it has bestrucked me and I'm crying as to why now my ponytail circumference has dropped by 1/8" and I see no reason for it, no shedding. A month ago, it was still at 3.75. Just wondering if others who have had hairloss have had it without a big shed. With such low shedding, I was so confident that maybe it was going to improve, and to the contrary. Thank you.

Your ponytail was 3.75" starting 5 years ago, irrespective of shedding.
When you had a baby, last year, it went up to 3.9" (which is normal - pregnancy hormones makes hair follicles stay in anagen until a bit after birth - we've told you this multiple times).
After you gave birth, your ponytail returned to 3.75" (which is also normal - once the pregnancy hormones are gone, most women experience a postpartum shed and lose their artificially-boosted "pregnancy hair" - we've also told you this multiple times).

Having your hair return to its normal thickness post-pregnancy is not hair loss. Having your ponytail stay at 3.75" for 5 years (barring a normal pregnancy-induced increas in thickness) is not hair loss.

I'm sorry, but barring any further information that you've not told us, both you and your husband are wrong. You're not experiencing hair loss. Maybe you have a higher-than-average shed rate, but you also have a higher-than-average ponytail circumference anyway. You are also clearly very concerned about this and this worry and anxiety is a long-term thing, since you've been making posts like this for months now. Please, go see your family doctor and talk about anxiety / OCD. There's no shame in it. Mental health is just as important as physical health. :flower:

[lapushka]

mamaherrera, I'm really sorry, but you are not having hair loss. Or, at least as far as you have said:



Your ponytail was 3.75" starting 5 years ago, irrespective of shedding.
When you had a baby, last year, it went up to 3.9" (which is normal - pregnancy hormones makes hair follicles stay in anagen until a bit after birth - we've told you this multiple times).
After you gave birth, your ponytail returned to 3.75" (which is also normal - once the pregnancy hormones are gone, most women experience a postpartum shed and lose their artificially-boosted "pregnancy hair" - we've also told you this multiple times).

Having your hair return to its normal thickness post-pregnancy is not hair loss. Having your ponytail stay at 3.75" for 5 years (barring a normal pregnancy-induced increas in thickness) is not hair loss.

I'm sorry, but barring any further information that you've not told us, both you and your husband are wrong. You're not experiencing hair loss. Maybe you have a higher-than-average shed rate, but you also have a higher-than-average ponytail circumference anyway. You are also clearly very concerned about this and this worry and anxiety is a long-term thing, since you've been making posts like this for months now. Please, go see your family doctor and talk about anxiety / OCD. There's no shame in it. Mental health is just as important as physical health. :flower:

Panth has said it a lot better than me. Now all the posts about repeated posts and no visible hairloss and possible mental issues are cropping up, you are trying to (what I see) eat your words and make out that your husband now suddenly does see something (while he has always counteracted your worrying). No... this is not normal behavior, sorry. Please go for help and see your family GP and a psychologist.

Me... I'm just waiting for the next post like this TBH. And these posts go way back already!

[Beborani]

I am with Lapushka--we will see more posts like this. That said, even if you have hairloss it is not the end of the world. I have spent most of my adulthood with profound hairloss (compared to starting point) with significant gaps (nothing like yours) that won't stay hidden and it did not affect my life negatively. People are too polite or self-involved to notice flaws in others and I must have looked just fine as I always got tons of compliments on my appearance and even hair as I learnt to style it creatively. Now my hair is growing back but it has not changed the quality of my life in any way. I won't say I am not delighted at this surprise 'gift' and am making the most of it but hair is not worth the angst I see in your posts--and you have wonderful hair and no hairloss that any of us can see. I am with others who ask you to seek help for anxiety--I used to have such anxiety many years ago on unrelated issue and wish there was help available--mental health was not as well understood as now.

[lapushka]

When I was borderline anorexic (for a certain period in time), I lost about half my thickness, but I wasn't as anxious as you over half an inch or an inch even (if that). IF there actually IS hairloss here. After so many posts, it's like the child who cried wolf. Sorry. But please go to a doctor, if not to exclude deficiencies then please to tackle these "issues" you're having. Worrying like you do, being as anxious as you are... it's not normal. Please *do* something about it, and preferably before the next post surfaces. :flower:

[spidermom]

But now even my husband has said, if this ponytail size keeps going down, you are going to lose your hair. Because it had gone down a bit a few months ago, and now a bit more. my husband just coldly says "you're losing your hair, face it and get on with it." my husband is saying "with the little 'bald spots' he has seen, like he says, where I'm missing like 2-3 hairs in my part, and with the drop in the pony, you're going to lose your hair." Accept it. my husband has always kept my hope going so strong, he's always said, "as long as the ponytail cir. stays the same, don't worry." and now look!

What the flippin' blankety blank?! (<- insert swear words of your choice) O.k., I get the impression that your husband has become sick of this hair obsession because who can see that 2 or 3 hairs are missing. Nobody! He wants you to shut up about this and get on with your life; that's what I think. I don't believe he can see that your hair is thinning at all. He's just flipping your obsession back at you, and it's not nice. Please do whatever it takes to turn your mind in a new direction and stop obsessing about your hair! Find some inspiration videos to watch. Your thoughts shape your life; find thoughts that work for you instead of against you. Take up a hobby. But stop it with the hair loss. Shedding hair is normal. We all do it.

[chen bao jun]

Sending love and hugs your way, Mama Herrera.

[mamaherrera]

mamaherrera, I'm really sorry, but you are not having hair loss. Or, at least as far as you have said:



Your ponytail was 3.75" starting 5 years ago, irrespective of shedding.
When you had a baby, last year, it went up to 3.9" (which is normal - pregnancy hormones makes hair follicles stay in anagen until a bit after birth - we've told you this multiple times).
After you gave birth, your ponytail returned to 3.75" (which is also normal - once the pregnancy hormones are gone, most women experience a postpartum shed and lose their artificially-boosted "pregnancy hair" - we've also told you this multiple times).

Having your hair return to its normal thickness post-pregnancy is not hair loss. Having your ponytail stay at 3.75" for 5 years (barring a normal pregnancy-induced increas in thickness) is not hair loss.

I'm sorry, but barring any further information that you've not told us, both you and your husband are wrong. You're not experiencing hair loss. Maybe you have a higher-than-average shed rate, but you also have a higher-than-average ponytail circumference anyway. You are also clearly very concerned about this and this worry and anxiety is a long-term thing, since you've been making posts like this for months now. Please, go see your family doctor and talk about anxiety / OCD. There's no shame in it. Mental health is just as important as physical health. :flower:

I will correct Panth, as helpful as you all want to be, you are also being a bit cruel. Maybe I will disappear from this place, so you dont have to see my posts any longer. Throughout my five years, I've had no hairloss. CORRECT PANTH. But now it has dropped, without SHEDDING.

[mamaherrera]

What the flippin' blankety blank?! (<- insert swear words of your choice) O.k., I get the impression that your husband has become sick of this hair obsession because who can see that 2 or 3 hairs are missing. Nobody! He wants you to shut up about this and get on with your life; that's what I think. I don't believe he can see that your hair is thinning at all. He's just flipping your obsession back at you, and it's not nice. Please do whatever it takes to turn your mind in a new direction and stop obsessing about your hair! Find some inspiration videos to watch. Your thoughts shape your life; find thoughts that work for you instead of against you. Take up a hobby. But stop it with the hair loss. Shedding hair is normal. We all do it.

SPIDERMOM-Even though it hits me like a spanking, I think I need it. Thank you

[spidermom]

I looked over your pictures, and your hair looks pretty. Next time your brain starts the hair loss worry, tell yourself "My hair is fine. Sometimes hair fluffs out more and looks thicker, sometimes it compacts more and looks thinner, and sometimes ponytail holders stretch out and wrap an extra turn. My hair is fine." Repeat until something else grabs your attention. Take good care of yourself, eat a nutritious diet as much as you can, drink plenty of water, get exercise and rest.

[lapushka]

I will correct Panth, as helpful as you all want to be, you are also being a bit cruel. Maybe I will disappear from this place, so you dont have to see my posts any longer. Throughout my five years, I've had no hairloss. CORRECT PANTH. But now it has dropped, without SHEDDING.

I'm sorry but that's kinda technically impossible to have thinner hair without shedding more. :confused: Color me confused here.

[gwenalyn]

I think everyone is correct on both ends. But I think I am so wanting to "not" have an issue, that I believe in any little small change possible, like "stretched elastic" and such. I really want it to all be ok. But now even my husband has said, if this ponytail size keeps going down, you are going to lose your hair. Because it had gone down a bit a few months ago, and now a bit more. spiderMOM. I appreciate your sharing about the fact that your ponytail can change, that does give me some hope because right now, my husband just coldly says "you're losing your hair, face it and get on with it." I really hope and pray it is just a small variance or I don't know what it could be. But yes, your words all give me comfort, and perhaps I do need some anxiety meds, I don't disagree or ignore such advice. But I guess, it's harder for me now because my husband is saying "with the little 'bald spots' he has seen, like he says, where I'm missing like 2-3 hairs in my part, and with the drop in the pony, you're going to lose your hair." Accept it. And I guess I don't know if it's an OCD issue or if I'm just struggling with the "acceptance" process. right now, I'm at a loss of words, my husband has always kept my hope going so strong, he's always said, "as long as the ponytail cir. stays the same, don't worry." and now look! I appreciate all the advice, suggestions, and such. I did try a psychologist once.

Just FYI, it can take a while to find the *right* therapist for you. I'm not saying you need one, but having been through mental health issues (bog-standard depression) myself, it is worth the trouble to find the right one. The first therapist I tried didn't work at all! But I've since found a wonderful therapist who helps me a lot. It can be tough to find the right one, but it's worth it. It sounds like your husband is not being the most supportive, for whatever reason, so sometimes it helps just to find someone who is a professional listener and supporter, even just for a little while.

[mamaherrera]

I think Gwenalyn that is what makes me more anxious, is his lack of support. I guess if I felt that I was not alone in this, I would not be so anxious. And yes, I just didn't feel a good vibe with the therapist .Kind of let down.

[lapushka]

I just wanted to respond to the word "cruel" being thrown around here. What are we supposed to say after the umpteenth message about hairloss (that in the end appears to be just fine)? I mean... if that's the way it is, then there's "other things" that are apparently going on. You can't undo your posting history on this board, and you can't kick those who have been following that posting history. I tend to pay attention to these things as they get posted. Your posts tend to stick out now, and it's not for a good reason, I'm afraid.

[hennalonghair]

I think Gwenalyn that is what makes me more anxious, is his lack of support. I guess if I felt that I was not alone in this, I would not be so anxious. And yes, I just didn't feel a good vibe with the therapist .Kind of let down.

You're not alone with this. There are all kinds of members here who suffer from OCD, myself included. I think the best thing you just did is accept the fact that its your thinking that could be off not your hair. This is a HUGE step. I'm proud of you. :smooch:There's certainly nothing to be ashamed of.

[browneyedsusan]

I agree you should seek treatment for your mental self-talk. It isn't good for you.

FWIW: My dearest friend is in chemo and has serious hair loss. I held her hand last week when she got a pixie. Her hair will continue to fall out for 3 more months. She may go completely bald. (She wears a wig now.) Dearest friend's hair will probably grow back. In 2 years she should be back down to shoulder. :) Another of my friends had harsher chemo. Her hair never grew back. She wears cute hats, and it doesn't slow her down a bit. She is alive and loving every minute of it.

Get treatment. You ought not beat yourself up about this. :grouphug:

[Silverbrumby]

Most psychological issues can be tackled indirectly as well as directly. As a new mum having demands placed on you from all directions it can be easy, easier, to focus on issues other than the ones that are causing you stress. Eg focusing in on hair issues when really you need more 'me' time to not me on call 24/7. A facial, nails, manicure, shopping, night/day out with friends letting your hair down.


What I'm throwing out there is you focusing in on something that will make you happy. Something little or big. A change in schedule, a book club online, a new hobby or a favorite of mine, yoga to spend time getting fit and de-stressing from life.


I'm am concerned with some of the responses above but what I hope you take from all of the feedback is that it's okay to be human and to not have XY or Z perfect. That you matter as a person and you might want to look at having a need met which currently isn't. That MiGHt include therapy of the traditional sort or it might not.


Be kind to yourself. Life is a hard battle and none of us gets out alive. Enjoy and find joy where you can.

[lapushka]

I'm am concerned with some of the responses above but what I hope you take from all of the feedback is that it's okay to be human and to not have XY or Z perfect. That you matter as a person and you might want to look at having a need met which currently isn't. That MiGHt include therapy of the traditional sort or it might not.



I am concerned too, believe me. But how else can you keep continuing to explain to someone that their hair is just "perfect", and that there is nothing wrong, really. Not after so many messages. It has to be something "different" going on then.

I really do hope you get some help, mamaherrera. No message above was meant to hurt you, really!

[Wosie]

I just wanted to swoop by to give mamaherrera a :grouphug: and a :blossom:. I know how tough and debilitating these kind of thoughts can be, I really do. Nothing to scoff at.
For how long have you been worried about this? I truly hope you'll find a way to see that there's nothing wrong with your hair--that there's no hair loss going on--and that you will instead rejoice at how healthy and beautiful it is. :flowers:

[mamaherrera]

Thanks!! Keep me in your prayers.

[Sofija]

I had the same. After getting a baby I lost a lot of hair and they were really thin. To get back my normal volume of hair I needed actually 4-5 years. The most important- to resist and not to cut them. I was using vitamines and I found one great russian balsam with onions agains loosing hair- it really works.

[mamaherrera]

That is so encouraging to hear Sofija. Maybe if I calm down and my hormones turn out better, things will change. I know many of you don't believe me, the whole "boy who cried wolf thing" but I often wonder if I put pictures of my hair ten years ago and now, if you would still say the same. But yes, I realize others have lost way more hair (bigger changes in ponytails) so it is comforting Sofija to know, that maybe I have had "minor" loss in my ponytail, but that it can still be "baby" even though she is a year old. Very comforting, thanks!

[Agnieszka]

Hugs to you Mamaherrera. I was thinking about you for the last few days and I hope you are not too upset about some of the replies and I'm really happy that you came back on forums. I was thinking, maybe your husband puts too much pressure on you for some reason? Life must be stresfull sometimes with four kids (I have two myself and some days it's just so hard).

[mamaherrera]

Thanks, yes life is very stressful, overwhelming, cleaning house, homeschooling,etc. Just never get it all done, but no, it's been like the last five years, when I began to have a big shed, I just have never seen my hair as I used to know it. And it's become very BIG in my life, this whole "not seeing my hair like it used to" and I began learning about hairloss, and it's began to freak me out. But maybe I'm just like Sofija up above, maybe with having kids, my hair has been a bit taxed, but not like permanent hairloss. I am going to get bloodwork done as well. As I have some thyroid nodules (more stress), maybe my thyroid is a bit not where it should be. But yeah. . . . thanks for thinking of me!