So... I need "Research"

[FallingDarkness]

You all well know that my mom and I don't exactly see eye to eye on hair care. Or hair length, for that matter.

Oh well.

ANYWAYS, she asked me the other week when the last time I had washed my hair (9 days ago!!!) and was revolted. When I tried to explain to her that stretching washes was actually HEALTHY for my hair, she wouldn't believe it, demanding to see "research" supporting my claim. Apparently, personal experience isn't good enough. She's heavily suggesting that I was my hair a minimum of twice a week (the horror!) unless I find actual research that backs up my idea of stretching washes. Although it's my hair and I can wash it when I want to, it's be nice to get her off my case about things she really shouldn't be on my case about.
Does anyone have any ideas on how I could go about finding said research, or have research of their own?
Thanks!

[kaydana]

What standard of research does your mum require? If you want real research I doubt you'll find any. I can think of no reason why anyone would fund research that would show washing hair less frequently is better, because research into such things are generally funded by companies wanting to sell you things.

[Sarahlabyrinth]

I don't know what kind of research you would find, to be honest. Why not show her some of the lovely hair on here? I think most LHCers stretch washes.

I wash mine every 8 days.

[stachelbeere]

I agree with kaydana... but how about showing her blog articles? and/or before-and-after pics of other wash-stretchers. articles about hair care before it became what it is now. Maybe that'll help? I feel you though, you'll get through this...hugs to you :)

[teal]

I don't know of anything specific to hair, but there's a book called "The Dirt On Clean: An Unsanitized History" (link (http://www.amazon.com/Dirt-Clean-Unsanitized-History/dp/0374531374/)) that is pretty much what the title says. It was a shock for me to realize how much of today's hygiene standards are driven by marketing and consumerism. (Everyone here knows stretching washes is not only doable but not dirty, but that's a hard sell to someone who was brought up to think leaving hair or body for more than a couple of days without a wash is totally unclean.)

You could ask her what specific concerns she has so as to better address them with research. (Does she think sebum is dirt? Does she think you have dandruff? Does she not like the smell of a natural scalp?) Our bodies are not delicate flowers in need of constant upkeep and maintenance... not usually, anyway. If they were, we as a species wouldn't be here to talk about it.

Also, if all else fails, you could "wash" your hair twice weekly... with water only... it's still a wash, and water is a solvent! :redgrin: If it's a smell thing, maybe put a drop or two of an essential oil in with some coconut oil or other carrier, and work a dab or two into your hair while it's still damp. Only if YOU like it, that is. If that were my mum, I'd probably just nod and smile and not change a thing about my routine, but I'm a bit stubborn. ;)

[spidermom]

I think that the health of your scalp is more important than the condition of your hair. You have to keep it clean. You can do it by mechanical means - brushing, preening, and so forth - or you can do it by washing. I blame stretching washes for causing me to develop seborrheic dermatitis. If you think washing hair is heinous, try dealing with itchy red bumps. Now I have to use medicated shampoo at least once a week.

I've seen several Internet articles describing how we can reduce our washing frequency to twice a week, but I haven't come across anything mainstream that suggests we wash less often than that. However, if you keep digging, you will find all extremes: wash it every day! twice a day! twice a year! never!

[teddygirl]

I'm sorry, but what is she going to do if you refuse to wash your hair twice a week? Throw you in the shower and wash your hair herself?

I'm so confused as to why she should care.

[Robot Ninja]

Do your roots look greasy? If they don't, just show her your roots. If it isn't dirty, why would you wash it?

If she can smell it then, yeah, she's right, you should wash more often, or at least CO-wash between shampoos (if you use shampoo, that is. If you don't, no need to tell your mom that. People I've told about CO-washing can't seem to fathom that conditioner will get your hair clean, I doubt your mom will be any different.) Unless she's actually sniffing your head to "prove" it's dirty; that's just weird.

[Carolyn]

I think most LHCers stretch washes.
I don't. I'm with mom on this one but I really don't know why she would care that much. Maybe you shouldn't discuss hair care with her? Stretching washes gives me an itchy, nasty smelling scalp and dry ends. No thank you.

[cathair]

Perhaps this will help? All their articles are written by cosmetic scientists who formula shampoo etc. Explains why hair won't get oilier and oiler:

http://thebeautybrains.com/2010/01/28/can-you-train-your-hair-to-be-less-oily/

This one is about not using shampoo at all and co-washing but might not back up your points so much:

http://thebeautybrains.com/2014/05/13/is-no-poo-a-good-way-to-clean-your-hair-the-beauty-brains-show-episode-30/

I have to add though, you would have saved yourself all this trouble by just not telling her you are stretching your washes. It's none of her business.

[Angela_Rose]

Okay, so at the risk of seeming mean or like I am making fun of you (I'm not!!!), you're 17, which may mean you're still using shampoo etc that Mom pays for.
If thAts the case, just tell her you're trying to save her some money.

[browneyedsusan]

I don't stretch washes. I can go 3 days, then it starts bugging me.

As a mom, I can see her point. She's wanting to make sure you're clean and neat, and this -idea of- stretching washes doesn't make any sense in her mind. Can you meet her halfway? Maybe not stretch quite as much, or ask her if your hair is smelly or greasy looking?

Choose your battles, Honey. this one may not be worth the casualties. :)

[Jorja]

just tell her you're trying to save her some money.

Lol I like that idea.

How about asking would she rather you rebel with stretching hair washes, or crack cocaine lol

[browneyedsusan]

Lol I like that idea.

How about asking would she rather you rebel with stretching hair washes, or crack cocaine lol

lol! That is funny --it would totally backfire in real life, but it is funny!--

When you talk with Mom, be very calm and patient with her. This is new for Mom. (Like her smart phone? When I got one, my teenagers gave me 10 minute lessons before school on how to use the thing! DS(19 and at college now), DD (18 still at home ). ) Explain why this is important to you. Find out what "dirty" means to her. Is it greasy? Smelly? Flakey? All of the above? Of course your Mom doesn't walk you walking around with hair like that. She loves you, and wants you to look like the pretty girl she adores. (FWIW, my DD couldn't stretch washes at 17 for more than one day, and it looked pretty greasy about 10 hours after she washed it! She went on Accutane to clear up her skin, and the oil production seems to have slowed a little. She's down to washing every other day now.) If your hair is in good shape for a long stretch between washes, she should come around to your way of thinking.

Involve Mom in your hair care. Have her brush it for you, and put it up sometimes. Ask her to check your ends and S & D if she wants to. Ask her if your hair seems dirty, or if you can stretch another day. If she's involved, she'll feel better about it.

Your mother loves you dearly, and wants the best for you. She wants you to have Disney princess hair, and so do you. Should be totally do-able, eh? :blossom:

[sarahthegemini]

Whilst I personally wouldn't go 9 days w/o washing, if it works for you, I cannot fathom why your mum would have such an issue with it. You've made many threads about her nasty controlling ways, quite frankly I'd tell her to shut the hell up and leave me.alone if it was me. Why does she feel the need to be so involved and controlling over something as trivial as hair washing?!

Eta: You're not going to find actual scientific proof btw because stretching washes doesn't work for everyone. And I suspect it wouldn't be 'good enough ' for your mother.

[lapushka]

Haha, that's so odd. When I was a teen, I needed 2 to 3 washes a week, and my dad and mom both said that washing hair that much wasn't good for it, and that once a week would be and should be enough. I never made it that far. At some point, my grandma got me some dry shampoo (in those days it was a whitish fluid in a regular mister bottle), to hint that I should wash it more. The dry shampoo was a fail, but at least the discussion was over then and I got to wash it twice a week (not that it was ever strictly prohibited). :lol:

I doubt you'll find research. But I wonder why you felt the need to share that with your mom, when you *know* she's not okay with it. :confused:

[DreamSheep]

A while back I had a quick dig too, but because as some people have pointed out, it doesn't work for everyone - means I didn't find much.

Personally, if it doesn't smell or look dirty, I wouldn't wash. Perhaps you could try some analogies:

Hair is essentially a fibre, our own fabric that grows from our head. It is fine like silk. We all know that silky clothes need to be washed and cleaned with a lot of care, and frequent washes dries out the fabric and causes it to wear and tear faster. Same applies to our own hair. If it doesn't need washing, I don't think it should be. If you do get itchy or unhappy scalps, then a wash is in need, but if you don't have these problems, it seems a bit unnecessary.
Also, BBB brushing and other techniques essentially provide another form of cleaning, by removing lint and distributing oils (much like dry cleaning I guess, and/or applying a brush to get lint of clothes) :p

[Robot Ninja]

Haha, that's so odd. When I was a teen, I needed 2 to 3 washes a week, and my dad and mom both said that washing hair that much wasn't good for it, and that once a week would be and should be enough. I never made it that far. At some point, my grandma got me some dry shampoo (in those days it was a whitish fluid in a regular mister bottle), to hint that I should wash it more. The dry shampoo was a fail, but at least the discussion was over then and I got to wash it twice a week (not that it was ever strictly prohibited). :lol:


My mom was like that too. My parents are from Eastern Europe, where they don't seem to have the obsession with super-cleanliness that people do over here. You washed things when they were dirty, including yourself. I got away with washing my hair when needed because it was obviously dirty, but oh, the nagging over my refusal to wear the same clothes two days in a row.

[gwenalyn]

... the nagging over my refusal to wear the same clothes two days in a row.

This is one of the funny things about America. Almost everybody knows you can wear the same clothes more than once before washing, but if you wear them twice in a row it's a huge faux pas! One of those silly illogical things, I guess.

[brickworld13]

This is one of the funny things about America. Almost everybody knows you can wear the same clothes more than once before washing, but if you wear them twice in a row it's a huge faux pas! One of those silly illogical things, I guess.

Actually, I'm not so sure that many people know you can wear the same clothes a couple of times before washing. Even suggesting it will make many many people think you have 5 heads. We have an unhealthy, obsessive relationship with cleanliness.

[MINAKO]

i would search the term on natural haven, sciency hair blog or curly nikki to come up with some evidence to back up your claim. hygral fatigue does exist, not sure if i would argument that way tho since twice a week is still less often than many people wash their hair and yet do probably not expirience it.

do yourdself afavor and start learning how to tell people like your mom sweet little lies. saves you alot of trouble.

[MINAKO]

double post! :flower:

[Kyla]

Like others have said, I don't think you're going to be able to find "research" on this. You can look into how people kept their hair clean a century or two ago without washing every few days, and show that to your mom. A lot of people stretched washes for a really long time and kept their hair clean and neat.

And, again repeating what others have said, stretching really doesn't work for everybody. I also can only go a few days before developing and itchy and irritated scalp, but even though I wash two to three times a week my hair is pretty healthy, and at a solid tailbone length now. If stretching that much is working for you, great! But keep in mind that it's okay if it's not really working, and if your hair is really greasy, smelly or your scalp is irritated it may be best to wash a bit more. I'm not trying to come across as unsympathetic, because growing up I had a similar relationship with my mom and my hair, but I'm just trying to say washing twice a week isn't the worst thing in the world.

[jeanniet]

I think you need to avoid discussing hair care with your mother, because it's an obvious bone of contention/power struggle between you. It's a hard thing for parents to learn, but trying to control kids generally backfires. Just nod and smile and do whatever it is you've been doing.

[Robot Ninja]

This is one of the funny things about America. Almost everybody knows you can wear the same clothes more than once before washing, but if you wear them twice in a row it's a huge faux pas! One of those silly illogical things, I guess.

Middle-schoolers certainly don't know that, and also pay way too much attention to what other people are wearing. So I started rotating my clothes, and that is how the floordrobe was born.

Then later I learned that it is actually better to let your clothes air out between wearings, so I'd been doing it right the whole time anyway. (Except for the keeping them on the floor part.)

[meteor]

Some relevant research:

1) Essentials of Hair Care often Neglected: Hair Cleansing by Zoe D. Draelos - http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3002407/ (Int J Trichology. 2010 Jan-Jun; 2(1): 24–29)
Quote: "Many persons feel that they do not have good hygiene unless they bathe daily. Technically, it is not necessary to shampoo the hair daily unless sebum production is high. Shampooing is actually more damaging to the hair shaft than beneficial. " (See under caption: "Everyday Shampoo")

2) The regulation of sebum excretion in man: http://link.springer.com/article/10.1007%2FBF00560397
Shows that "refatting" peaks during the first hour after washing, and the presence of oil on the skin’s surface sends a signal to the sebaceous glands to turn off. This signal is caused by either the pressure of the oil in the follicle or by the creation of a chemical signal that travels back down through the skin.

3) Damage (protein loss) from washing is mentioned in Effect of mineral oil, sunflower oil, and coconut oil on prevention of hair damage - http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/12715094 (J Cosmet Sci. 2003 Mar-Apr;54(2):175-92)

4) Resistance of human hair cuticle after a shaking process in wet conditions: comparison between Chinese and Caucasian hair - http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/20491991 (Int J Cosmet Sci. 2010 Oct;32(5):356-68. doi: 10.1111/j.1468-2494.2009.00563.x) - "Hair cuticle is the first protection shield of hair against external aggressions such as daily combing or brushing that induce friction, mechanical stress leading to ageing process." Both Caucasian and Asian hair showed some cuticle tear in wet conditions.

5) Hygral fatigue (from excessive swelling and de-swelling of cuticle in water) can be inferred from the discussion of damage in Hair shaft damage from heat and drying time of hair dryer by Lee et. al. - http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/22148012 (Ann Dermatol. 2011 Nov;23(4):455-62. doi: 10.5021/ad.2011.23.4.455. Epub 2011 Nov 3) and Integral hair lipid in human hair follicle by Lee - http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/21906914 (J Dermatol Sci. 2011 Dec;64(3):153-8. doi: 10.1016/j.jdermsci.2011.08.004. Epub 2011 Aug 22)
Since washed hair needs to be dried somehow, this is also relevant: "Hair shaft damage from heat and drying time of hair dryer" study shows dryness and some damage from both air-drying (to cell-membrane-complex) and blow-drying (to cuticle), compared to untreated (i.e. unwashed) control group.

6) And since after washing hair also needs to be combed / brushed, the research on damage from combing/brushing might be of use, too:
Protein loss quantification of abraded virgin and abraded bleached hair according to Bradford assay - http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/15645094 (J Cosmet Sci. 2004;55 Suppl:S175-9)
The effect of brushing on hair loss in women - http://www.docguide.com/effect-brushing-hair-loss-women?tsid=5 (Kiderman A, Gur I, Ever-Hadani P; Journal of Dermatological Treatment 1-3 (Nov 2008))

I would say that in the research that I've seen it seems like it's understood that excessive manipulation and excessive grooming damage hair, like they would damage any fiber.
There isn't much targeted research into this, as I believe other LHC-ers mentioned, there isn't much motivation for them to research it without funding from cosmetics companies. The motivation for cosmetics companies to fund research is to try and prove the need to use more new products rather than the need to leave hair alone.

[CremeTron]

Middle-schoolers certainly don't know that, and also pay way too much attention to what other people are wearing. So I started rotating my clothes, and that is how the floordrobe was born.

Then later I learned that it is actually better to let your clothes air out between wearings, so I'd been doing it right the whole time anyway. (Except for the keeping them on the floor part.)

Hilarious, "the floordrobe"! My son has one. As a parent I do underline the importance of cleanliness to my children. When they get older they can stretch or what have you but I want them to know a certain standard.

I think as parents sometimes we worry that our children will not understand social norms and embarrass themselves or isolate themselves so I would say maybe she is just worried.

It is working for you you so she should understand that. I cannot comment on the controlling aspect as I have not seen your other posts.

You can fib next time. Not the best idea but at least you will not have the drama.

[Hrtchoco]

I kinda agree with your mom...Anyway, I don't think it's worth the argument to be honest. Just wait until you leave home and go to college, then you can do whatever you want! But since you are living under her roof, you might want to listen to her (for now). If you really don't have to wash it twice a week, how about every 6 days?

[spidermom]

No fibbing or little white lies. Your integrity will be compromised.

[Annalouise]

If I was a mom and my child washed their hair every 9 days (was it 9?) I might be concerned also.
My mother grew up on a farm with no running water and they bathed once a week.

I think that some cleanliness is required for young people so they don't get into habits of not washing.

I moved out when I was 17. I think it won't be long before you move out also so if it makes your mother happy while you're living in her house
and eating her food ect... I think you should do what she asks.:)

[CremeTron]

I agree with these..

[burny]

for "washing your hair every couple days isn't necessary" ammunition: perhaps look to the people who NEVER 'wash' their hair(eg. water only or conditioner only).. as far as research, I don't know of any. but I do know that excessive soap is bad for skin health(it kills off bacteria's that help prevent other bacteria's from building up.. similar to how antibiotics weaken your immune system, and frequent enema's can interfere with digestive function)

[kimichan]

I don't think there's a correct answer to how long one should go without washing their hair, everyone is different and their hair responds differently to the amount, or lack of, washing. Neither of you are in the wrong, and so long as your hair isn't gross from it your mum should just leave you alone about it.

[Timea]

I'm sorry, but what is she going to do if you refuse to wash your hair twice a week? Throw you in the shower and wash your hair herself?

I'm so confused as to why she should care.

My mother did that to me a few times when I was a teenager. She said I had lost privacy privileges. I hope the OP's mother won't do that to her.



FallingDarkness, I think you should do what you need to do. You're the one that knows your situation best and your mother best. You know whether this is a battle you want to fight or not. Sometimes you can say "Thank you for your concern" and "I'll keep that in mind" and "Thanks for the advice" and do your own thing. My BBB keeps my hair clean so I only need to wash it twice a month. If I go longer it gets a little itchy, but I live alone and the only people who might tell me to wash it now are my cats who might lick my head now and then. ;)

Some people have suggested water only. I've found that water only will make my hair greasy and make it hard for me to stretch washes but if I do a vinegar rinse after my hair gets wet then I can go back to stretching okay. So if you've found the water only doesn't work for you personally then you could try the vinegar thing, just a splash of vinegar in a bowl of water poured over your head and rubbed in. Maybe won't pass the sniff test until it's dry though, so in that case maybe conditioner wash if that works for you, or just spritz one of those body spray things on your head or something.

[gwenalyn]

Middle-schoolers certainly don't know that, and also pay way too much attention to what other people are wearing. So I started rotating my clothes, and that is how the floordrobe was born.

Then later I learned that it is actually better to let your clothes air out between wearings, so I'd been doing it right the whole time anyway. (Except for the keeping them on the floor part.)


Floordrobe, I love it! That's how mine started too, in middle school. it's now a "door-hook-drobe" but that's way less fun of a word.

[Red'N'Curly]

Maybe you could CO wash only your scalp? And then if she asks if you've washed just say "yes." Personally I feel that if you are living in her house it would just be polite to try and meet halfway and to try not to be defiant. I used to disagree with my mom about this too as a teen. She wanted me to wash with H+S every single day to prevent dandruff, but it was so drying it actually caused flaking! Instead of fighting, when I took a shower I would get my hair wet. She just assumed if I had wet hair that I had shampooed it ;)

Just a few more years ;)