PDA

View Full Version : Feeling Ugly



Amahaitz
December 22nd, 2014, 01:45 PM
My husband took some pictures of me today that honestly have me wanting to cry. I have lost 35 pounds since this time last year (my office Christmas party), but oh my God I am still SO HUGE. I was shocked. And my forehead is so huge and my wrinkles are so deep--when did it get so bad? I feel like stopping somewhere on the way home and getting some bangs cut to try to hide some of the horror of my forehead. I should add that I am PMSing pretty hard right now and this time of the year is hard for me anyway, but I feel so awful. What would you do if you were me?

Annalouise
December 22nd, 2014, 01:53 PM
Oh my God! You silly goose, you are beautiful!!! You need to just go out and have some tea and pie and read a good book
and just relax. There is absolutely nothing wrong with your hair or your face or your body! haha,
I think you're just pmsing.
Girl, you don't have anything to worry about.:flower:

pearlsandpinups
December 22nd, 2014, 02:06 PM
I don't know what you're talking about, you're just lovely! Such brilliant eyes and what a GORGEOUS SMILE! :D Perfect teeth! :)

I wouldn't hide that face behind bangs at all. :) Your hair's lovely as is!

Duchess Fuzzy Buns
December 22nd, 2014, 02:11 PM
Oh my God! You silly goose, you are beautiful!!! You need to just go out and have some tea and pie and read a good book
and just relax. There is absolutely nothing wrong with your hair or your face or your body! haha,
I think you're just pmsing.
Girl, you don't have anything to worry about.:flower:
Completely agreed! I'm definitely not seeing the ugly person you apparently see, Amahaitz. I just see a beautiful woman. I think you'd probably look good with bangs too, but don't do anything impulsive that you might regret later just because you're feeling ugly today. Maybe think on it a week? I hope you feel better soon. :flowers:

MINAKO
December 22nd, 2014, 02:11 PM
uhm, i clicked this and after reading i did prepare myself for someone who would probably not be ugly but at least visibly unhappy and lacking confidence, so imwas thinking about what nice word i could come up with... but, girl you look fantastic!!!

your face is glowing, you ooze confidence in these shots and the hair is on point.i got nothing more to say that i hope you get over with those PMS symptoms fast :P
You look beautiful!

Tussi
December 22nd, 2014, 02:11 PM
Stop being so hard on yourself! You are beautiful, please keep smiling like you do in those pictures. It sounds like pms, I too feel the same way those certain days. I second the suggestion of tea, pie and a good book.

Madora
December 22nd, 2014, 02:12 PM
:blossom:Amahaitz, your photos and you are lovely! The color of your hair is gorgeous! Your worries are needless!

GreenFairy
December 22nd, 2014, 02:12 PM
You have to be kidding me! You are beautiful! Midol is a wonder drug!

Kyla
December 22nd, 2014, 02:18 PM
I empathize, because I really dislike how I look in photos as well. But you are beautiful!

Leeloo
December 22nd, 2014, 02:20 PM
I agree 100% with everyone else who commented – you're gorgeous! Your hair, your smile everything looks fabulous :) Silly, just let father time get you to feeling back to normal in a few days with some good rest and relaxation and pie, yeah, some pie would be great

Laurenji
December 22nd, 2014, 02:27 PM
I love, love, LOVE your hair in these photos! You look so good! I can definitely empathize with feeling like you look weird in photos - I feel so unphotogenic. The camera can be really unforgiving. But just like everyone else has said, you look happy and beautiful! Congrats on being able to lose weight.

Halliday
December 22nd, 2014, 02:32 PM
You are literally beautiful. You have the prettiest smile, hair and eyes. Your forehead is completely ordinary!

summergreen
December 22nd, 2014, 02:36 PM
Agree with everyone else, you are beautiful! Don't change anything!! :)

lapushka
December 22nd, 2014, 02:41 PM
If the PMS is really that bad (and it is, you are being silly!), I would try and do something about it. Go see a doctor, try and resolve it, so that you won't be stuck in this position ever again. If you're doubting yourself that hard, something terrible is up!

StellaKatherine
December 22nd, 2014, 02:45 PM
I have other issue.. I look better on photos than in real life hehe Anyway, I must say you are beautiful woman! I do not see all the problem arreas which you said about!

Charybdis
December 22nd, 2014, 02:46 PM
Amahaitz, you're a very pretty woman and I'm sure your husband loves your smile in those pictures. Your forehead is fine, you do not need bangs! It looks like you might benefit from a bit more weight loss purely for health reasons (like most of us, and well done on those 35 lbs. so far!), but you are lovely just as you are. :grouphug:

teddygirl
December 22nd, 2014, 02:53 PM
Congrats on your weightloss! You look amazing, and so beautiful. And DAMN you got rack!

MINAKO
December 22nd, 2014, 03:06 PM
I have other issue.. I look better on photos than in real life hehe Anyway, I must say you are beautiful woman! I do not see all the problem arreas which you said about!
me too, unless i have a tan and take pictures in low light at the same time, makes me look like a skeleton with big brows, lol. otherwise i know my angles and how to take decent pictures that show none of my real life awkwardness, but ugly is a hard word imo, certainly the last thing that would have come to my mind looking at the photos shown by Amahaitz.

Alexa
December 22nd, 2014, 04:08 PM
We women are so, so hard on ourselves. I read my daughter fairy tales and myths, and find myself cringing at how many times girls are introduced as beautiful or lovely or attractive. It is so culturally ingrained in us to view our appearance as a huge part of our worth, and then we're surrounded by movie stars and models who have professionals to dress and groom them, and photo editors to make it all look so flawless. But that isn't really real, and we are so much more than how we look.

Think about the wonderful women you truly love in your life. Are they beautiful to you? They probably are, but not necessarily because they fit any certain ideal of beauty. You may admire certain features, of course, but the light of their personality is likely what matters most in how you perceive them. So be forgiving of your looks, knowing others see so much more in you than the sum of your features. Try to see yourselves as your loved ones do. It isn't easy, I know, after all the cultural training we receive to strive for perfection, but it's a worthwhile pursuit.

I don't know you, of course, but when I looked at your photos, I saw none of the flaws you described. Instead, I saw a warm smile and a sparkle in your eyes. You have lovely, long hair, too, and an attractive decollete! In short, I see a beautiful woman. {{HUGS}}

MINAKO
December 22nd, 2014, 04:24 PM
evertime i feel a bit ****ty about my appearance i take a picture of myself like this http://www.buzzfeed.com/annanorth/5-beautiful-models-making-amazing-uglyfaces#.riJj6vxLk
laugh at it, then send it to my mom and my best friend for them to laugh at it and then i move on, lol. all it takes is along evening in the bathroom indulging in some of my favorite treat to feel much better. mabye i look exactly the same ro others afterwards, but the mere activity of taking care of myself calms me and makes me feel like i value whats given to me in the right way. i just recieved a bunch of korean skincare and cosmetics last week, hardly anything can put me down at this point.
there certainly is satisfaction to these kind of things. getting comfortable about our very own epectations and being good to ourselves is as much as we can do. dont ever take pressure from anyone. :flower:

embee
December 22nd, 2014, 04:35 PM
Plainly I don't see what you see. :)

Pictures of an attractive happy woman with gorgeous hair and a great smile.

Did you want to look 19? Really?

swearnsue
December 22nd, 2014, 04:42 PM
You are beautiful as you are. It's chocolate week. You are probably feeling better already, I hope. I love your hair!

DweamGoiL
December 22nd, 2014, 05:33 PM
First off - CONGRATULATIONS on the 35 lbs. That is no easy feat! Secondly, I agree with the others that you look great. You are beautiful and very curvy ;) Don't beat yourself up. I also went through some major weight loss a few years back and after I lost a good 40 lbs or so, I thought I should look a certain way, but I didn't. Just hang in there and keep up the good work. Your confidence will build as you near your goal. In the meantime, have fun and know there is absolutely nothing wrong or ugly about you!!!

CousinItt
December 22nd, 2014, 05:33 PM
It's funny how PMS can distort your view of yourself. I'll be trucking along just fine and then I hit my time of the month and wonder how I became such a hideous monster. It's a bizarre trick of the brain. I have discovered that if I avoid foods that cause sugar crashes (unrefined carbs, sugar, fruit juice, soda), my PMS symptoms are much more manageable.

You are most definitely very pretty. Your skin is radiant and there's nothing wrong with your forehead. You should be proud of the weight you've lost - it's very difficult for women after 40 to lose weight since that's when our metabolism slows down. Obviously you're doing something right.

arr
December 22nd, 2014, 05:59 PM
From your words I was bracing myself for something really awful and then I see your picture and you are not only not ugly at all, you are stunning! It's the PMS. It happens to me too.

Annalouise
December 22nd, 2014, 06:06 PM
From your words I was bracing myself for something really awful and then I see your picture and you are not only not ugly at all, you are stunning! It's the PMS. It happens to me too.

Ohh that's funny! Me too, I was bracing myself for some 4 headed monster from another galaxy and lo and behold... a beautiful lady appears.

too funny.:p

Atira
December 22nd, 2014, 06:24 PM
woah. See I think you look like a model. Just gorgeous!!!!

Ambrielle
December 22nd, 2014, 06:35 PM
If i can look that good in 10 years time you bet i will be one very happy lady! :D no need for bangs unless you're positive you fancy a change and won't likely regret it. I love the colour of your hair! :flower:

allycat
December 22nd, 2014, 06:46 PM
You've got to be kidding! You're gorgeous!

patienceneeded
December 22nd, 2014, 07:21 PM
You are beautiful! Congrats on the weight loss. I see no need for bangs unless they will make you happy and you want them for YOU, not to hide an imagined fault.

LauraLongLocks
December 22nd, 2014, 07:34 PM
When I clicked on the photos, I saw a self-confident woman with an easy, natural smile. I did not see anything that could be interpreted as being ugly.

Congratulations on your weight loss. 35 lbs is quite an accomplishment.

Don't cut bangs to cover your beautiful face. You are beautiful. I love your hair color and shine, too. Don't change a thing.

Nadine <3
December 22nd, 2014, 09:48 PM
I have other issue.. I look better on photos than in real life hehe Anyway, I must say you are beautiful woman! I do not see all the problem arreas which you said about!

This happens to me! I take a picture and I think "wow, I'm hot" and then I look in the mirror and I'm like..."I look like Shrek!"

Honestly though, you're beautiful! I don't see wrinkles, all I can see is great hair, clear skin, and beautiful teeth! Have a cup of tea, maybe some chocolate for the PMS. It will pass, it always does!

Caraid♫
December 22nd, 2014, 09:50 PM
After talking to certain friends and hearing about their insecurities (friends who are beautiful inside out in my eyes), I'm absolutely convinced that even the most beautiful woman in the world feels "ugly" at least some days. I don't know if that makes you feel any better, but maybe it can help you realize that you don't always see yourself as others see you. I know, it's so awful when you just can't shake that "ugly" feeling regardless of what you know or what people tell you. But I will tell you that I think you are beautiful :D

Islandgrrl
December 22nd, 2014, 09:53 PM
Oh my goodness, you're gorgeous!

It's so easy to be self-critical! I know, I do it all the time and it's effortless!

I don't know how to make you feel better, but I'm absolutely sure you are being much too hard on yourself.

HumanBean
December 23rd, 2014, 01:17 AM
Oh my goodness I really was expecting something else. I think you look adorable.

Undomiel
December 23rd, 2014, 01:32 AM
You are literally beautiful. You have the prettiest smile, hair and eyes. Your forehead is completely ordinary!
Yes, this right here! You sort of remind me of Torrin Paige a bit (long hair youtuber) and I've always thought she is absolutely gorgeous. I hope you have a Merry Christmas <3

Youngjae
December 23rd, 2014, 01:39 AM
Awww.. Honey, If I manage to look similar to you when I'm an adult, I would be over the moon, you have such a nice smile, you shouldn't feel like you should have to get bangs to hide such a pretty face behind!!!!!! I think it's part of being human to have this kind of self hatred in regards to our bodies. I look in the mirror and I'm like 'well.... I'm so chubby and my face is in a constant state of derp'. My new penpal sent me a picture of her the other week and asked for a picture back and I'm like 'oh my goodness she is so gorgeous and I am really not!'... I think it's just the mind that plays tricks on all of us.... Awwww... I feel so bad for you I want to give you a hug!!!!!

Halliday
December 23rd, 2014, 01:50 AM
The prettiest people always seek out flaws ;)

fiğrildi
December 23rd, 2014, 01:58 AM
Oh, no! You're a beautiful, beautiful woman!! I want to look like you when I'm older :flowers:
I don't see deep wrinkles, I see a big, beautiful smile!! You transmit lots of self-confidence, and genuine happiness :)
And I have to say that I love your dress, and your hair :crush:

Have you seen this video? I think you might like it:


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=litXW91UauE&spfreload=10

bte
December 23rd, 2014, 02:38 AM
Don't cry! The combination of your smile and your hair and just perfect.

anastasiashea
December 23rd, 2014, 02:47 AM
You are beautiful! That is totally honest, and not even in an "everybody's beautiful" hokey sort of way. You're a fox. Body dysmorphia is real, and happens a LOT during and after weight loss. For some reason, your brain can't quite catch up to your physical changes, even when they're staring you in the face. It's frustrating, because I bet it'll be hard to accept that all these compliments everyone's giving you are genuine, but I wish you could just see yourself through my eyes right now!

vega
December 23rd, 2014, 03:13 AM
I think you look beautiful and I love your hair color , try not to be harsh n yourself your beautiful

gnome82
December 23rd, 2014, 03:46 AM
You look fantastic :D

LadyCelestina
December 23rd, 2014, 04:36 AM
How come people who post threads on feeling ugly always look so drop dead gorgeous? :lol:

Wosie
December 23rd, 2014, 06:03 AM
[...] Have you seen this video? I think you might like it:


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=litXW91UauE&spfreload=10

Goodness, this video made me cry. :') I've also had a very distorted view on my looks for many years and often thought I was ugly even though people'd disagree. I think I have a huge, too square jaw, and I used to think I had a too big and wide nose (I kinda like my nose these days).

Either way, OP, I wanted to reply to you before I went to bed last night but I was so tired. Either way, the first thing that came to my mind when I saw your pictures was that you look very pretty. Gorgeous smile and beautiful eyes and your hair is amazing. It's so easy to be harsh on oneself, remember, it's our very own faces we scrutinise and criticise every day in the mirror. Nobody stares at our own face more than we do, and when you see something over and over it gets boring/uninteresting and not special. However, I think it's near impossible to see your own face in an unbiased way. You are beautiful!
:grouphug:

Edelweiss
December 23rd, 2014, 06:13 AM
Gosh I was expecting something really bad reading your description, you're crazy you look really good !
I don't really see those horrible wrinkles you're talking about and you're absolutely not huge !

Ps: Can I have your boobs please, I'm in need of some :lol:

kitschy
December 23rd, 2014, 06:36 AM
Your post made me feel better about myself. If someone as lovely as you feels so insecure, then there is hope for me when I'm feeling insecure. Thank you.

mariechin1234
December 23rd, 2014, 06:52 AM
Your hair is great. I love it. Size doesn't matter as long that you're comfortable with yourself. Keep up the good work of having a healthy lifestyle, Amahaitz. Cheers!

RubyTuesday
December 23rd, 2014, 07:19 AM
I clicked on the link expecting to see someone a bit ropey :)
When I saw the first photo I though "Whaaaat?". You are really pretty! However, you are obviously comparing yourself to your younger/firmer/less lined self which none of us know or have seen. We simply see a pretty woman with good hair and a lovely smile. Your are honestly very attractive.

If you compare yourself to how you were when you were 29 though, you will always feel disappointed and unhappy. I am all for self-improvement and trying not to completely let yourself go, but at the same time, you have to be realistic. Yes, get a fringe cut if it makes you feel less self-conscious, but just bare in mind that the things that you fixate on do not even register with most people!

I am guilty of obsessing over my jowls and my sagging skin :) We all do it!

iYaap
December 23rd, 2014, 08:47 AM
I see a happy face, and hey, a longhair is never ugly!

Remi
December 23rd, 2014, 08:58 AM
No NO! Don't touch that beautiful hair! I saw a gorgeous lady in those photos. PMS will distort your thoughts. Relax and don't think about it. Turn on some nice music and have a cup of your favorite tea :)

Amahaitz
December 23rd, 2014, 09:13 AM
You guys...thank you all so much. You have all been so kind and made me feel so much better. I wish I could give all of you a hug :) I feel so dumb getting upset about superficial things like appearance because I know that they don't really matter in the grand scheme of things anyway... It just seems like that's what I start obsessing and beating myself up about whenever I'm upset/worried/feeling out of control about something else (real). I know I'm doing it, but I can't stop. And of course the PMS does not help at all. That ending is one of the aspects of getting older that I will not be a bit sorry about. :) Thanks again, I love you all!

Maurelle
December 23rd, 2014, 10:00 AM
I think your photos are lovely! We all have days where we feel ick about ourselves. I blame the heavy feeling on your girls. They always make you feel bigger than what you are! Have you thought about pampering yourself a little? Maybe a massage, or mani/pedi? Anything that helps you relax and focuses on you.

Nimia
December 23rd, 2014, 10:24 AM
Ditto on what everyone else said: I clicked on the photos and saw a gorgeous smile and hair, and a whole lotta va-va-VOOM! In a Christina Hendricks-knockout sort of way. Wowza.

Besides for the PMS, I blame your photo shock on the lighting. Overhead lighting is about as unfriendly as it gets, as is a lot of indoor lighting in general. I'm your age and sometimes go by the wrong mirror and flinch. "Gah! Where did those shadows around my sunken eyes come from, and all those lines??? When did those creases at the top of my nose show up? Gahhhhhhh." Get the lighting right, though, and things start looking better. There's a reason Oprah made a big deal about the special, flattering stage lighting she got for her talk show, several years ago.

My husband almost always manages to snap pics while I'm standing directly under a light. Sigh. I suppose it proves that no one else is noticing the effects of the bad lighting, except we PMSing photo victims.

Agnes Hannah
December 23rd, 2014, 11:32 AM
Erm I see beauty actually in the photos, and you have one heck of a figure, go get em girlfriend!

winship2
December 23rd, 2014, 11:32 AM
I don't know about you all but I feel uplifted just seeing how kind and generous women can be to each other. What a great community it is here-- cheese for us all!

Agnieszka
December 23rd, 2014, 11:40 AM
May I just say that you are beautiful? Haven't checked what everybody here replied but I bet they said the same. I think you have stunning smile, beautiful teeth, beautiful eyes and glowing skin, great luxorious hair and your body is HOT!

Alexa
December 23rd, 2014, 03:46 PM
I love that beauty sketches video, fiğrildi! Here's another great one:
http://youtu.be/GXoZLPSw8U8

allycat
December 23rd, 2014, 04:29 PM
...If you compare yourself to how you were when you were 29 though, you will always feel disappointed and unhappy. I am all for self-improvement and trying not to completely let yourself go, but at the same time, you have to be realistic.!

Wow, I just wanted to say that I don't feel this way at all! I sure hope I'm not the only one!

I've liked my looks more and more with age. My 30's surprised me in that I felt like I inhabited being a woman more fully. And then an older friend told me to look forward to 40 because what a great decade that was - and it was even better! I like the way my face has more personality, and I don't know, just the years start to show. And now I'm 50 and continue to like the way I look in the mirror. Not perfect, never have been. Crow's feet, laugh lines, freckles. But I never was a big fan of perfect. I prefer character. Individuality. Difference. I find it very appealing the way time, experience, and a life well-lived, shape a person's appearance.

Anyway, just had to point out that it's not ar all a given to prefer the beauty of youth over age! My husband, for example. Major fan of older women ;)

spidermom
December 23rd, 2014, 09:10 PM
I really detest how I look in most pictures also, so I get it. But if I looked like you, I'd heave a sigh of relief.

Congrats on the weight loss! I've gained since last year, and I was too fat already.

patchoulilove
December 23rd, 2014, 10:23 PM
Truly beautiful. I love your hair! And your smile! And there is such a nice brightness in your eyes!

I hope you feel better soon. Whatever flaws you focus on and perceive as there are not obvious to the fresh eyes of a stranger. It's easy to become hypercritical of ourselves, but honestly: ease your mind. You look terrific.

:blossom:
patchoulilove

hairpleasegrow
December 23rd, 2014, 10:32 PM
I didn't look at your pictures but I already can tell you are being way too hard on yourself. Remember your worst day is someone else's dream day. I feel ugly too sometimes, I have a number of skin problems but I feel similar nonetheless. If you are going to cut your hair remember to wait two weeks and think about it. PMS ing is no fun ! This time of year is stressful too , you may be seeing things that aren't there.

nakima
December 27th, 2014, 06:43 PM
you are very pretty your hair color is awesome! you have nice skin. Try not to worry so much. Maybe it's perimenopause getting ready to kick in or winter blues either way it wil pass. I get down on myself this way also from time to time but other people do not see me the way that I do and obviously from the comments here none of us are seeing what your seeing either. Your a lovely woman dont forget that.

Hibernis
December 27th, 2014, 11:34 PM
Seconding EVERYTHING these ladies have said. Girl, you're hot. You got this.

Maybe it's time to revamp the wardrobe. When you're losing weight, your body does go through a few different shapes and bra sizes. Picking up 2-3 pieces and a new bra every 15 lbs is a good idea. I think right now, V-necks and boat necks might be really good for where your body is. Framing with necklines can do a lot for a girl. Even at my skinniest I felt like a lump in scoop necks. Just doesn't work for my body.

Go get some new clothes that make you feel like a million bucks. You deserve it!

Callifornia
December 27th, 2014, 11:54 PM
I second everything everyone's said here!
I just wanted to add one extra thing... from personal experience, it looks like it was really horrible lighting for good pictures. I have had pics taken within 15 minutes of each other in different lighting and in one (over head flourecent lighting) I looked alot heavier and like I had terrible frown lines. The other pic looked alot different and alot better. (Natural indirect light)
Don't feel down, you honestly look fantastic! Dont be too hard on yourself, it was pictures taken in lighting that wouldn't flatter anyone.

M-L-E
December 28th, 2014, 03:23 AM
You look incredible. Beautiful smile, beautiful hair, glowing skin and perfect teeth. :blossom: :love: I hope the comments you see here will help pick you up, and see that even strangers admire your beauty. Sometimes, we are our own worst enemy... Our "flaws" are blindingly obvious to our own eyes, but completely non-existent to other people! I am in my twenties and I am so jealous of your clear, perfect skin. Mine is still covered in acne!

Zindell
December 28th, 2014, 04:37 AM
First thought in my mind when I opened the first pic: "Oh, you are so sweet!"

You truly do look great! I promise! And you definitely don't need any bangs. Hair, eyes, smile, everything is so perfect as it is. :flower:

Kome
December 28th, 2014, 05:19 AM
oh wow. You are REALLY pretty. Your hair is gorgeous and I love your body shape and your dress. You look great! Take a deep breath and think over the bangs for a week or two. Personally, I'm really liking the long bang look on you. Maybe something chin length? Even if you go short, they'll grow back in a 6 months or so. That's what's nice about bangs. They grow out fast and blend in with the rest of your hair. :)

Johannah
December 28th, 2014, 05:20 AM
After reading your description I was preparing myself to see some really ugly pictures, but really, the first thing I thought was: such a beautiful and friendly women! Your personality shines through your appearance and that's the most beautiful feature someone can have in my opinion. I don't need to know you to see you are a really loving person. :flower:

CremeTron
December 28th, 2014, 05:25 AM
The prettiest people always seek out flaws ;)

This is so true.

First, PMS week is a good time to ignore that critical voice.

And second,I think you look beautiful and well done on the weight loss! I need to lose 2-3 stone myself and it is very difficult so that is a huge achievement!

Angelica
December 28th, 2014, 05:26 AM
Oh, no! You're a beautiful, beautiful woman!! I want to look like you when I'm older :flowers:
I don't see deep wrinkles, I see a big, beautiful smile!! You transmit lots of self-confidence, and genuine happiness :)
And I have to say that I love your dress, and your hair :crush:

Have you seen this video? I think you might like it:


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=litXW91UauE&spfreload=10

This video is amazing and inspiring. I think a lot of women feel ugly on certain days, perhaps they are tired or stressed or ill, but of course like the video portrays they are better looking than they realise. I hope that OP is feeling better. Like others have stated, you are beautiful, I love your hair, it is gorgeous, so long and pretty and your smile - you are beautiful!

Eastbound&Down
December 28th, 2014, 04:42 PM
Absolutely beautiful! Don't do anything without thinking about it. Use the 2 week rule :) if you still want bangs after 2 weeks then do it.

becker
December 28th, 2014, 06:17 PM
I think you look gorgeous.

BlueMajorelle
December 28th, 2014, 06:56 PM
We all have those days, no matter how secure we are with ourselves. You remind me a lot of my former art professor and mentor, now friend. And I always thought she was gorgeous.

Adiro
December 29th, 2014, 12:07 AM
I am sorry you feel that way.... Really it must be that time of the month, because you are so pretty!
And about the lines on your forehead, well, many have those worse than you, I had mine since I was 14, and my forehead is not as nice and tall and intelligent looking like yours is.... Those are called expression lines, in case that you don't know :) it means that you are good at talking with your face

Nenyath
December 29th, 2014, 05:25 AM
Dear Amahaitz, we have no harder critic than ourselves! Losing 35 pounds in a year is a great feat! Your hair is beautiful and yes you have wrinkles but the ones I notice are the ones around your eyes, those that speak og smiles and laughter! I think hormones have thrown you out of balance, but you are beautiful and you should know that :) And no, no bangs needed, just a smile!

laurarvt
December 29th, 2014, 10:38 AM
First of all, you are beautiful. I also just wanted to add that as a person whose lost weight a few times that (at least for me) it didn't stop the "ugly" feelings. I just started to dislike other things about myself. I don't know what that is about...=)

Kendrix
December 29th, 2014, 11:27 PM
Your hair is such a beautiful blend of colors. Are those highlights natural?

betterhairday
January 19th, 2015, 08:42 AM
I looked at all your photos and I certainly don't see an ugly person! I am amazed that you managed to lose all that weight and for you not to have a turkey neck or what they call in the UK bingo arms (i.e. loose flesh at the tops of your arms). You should treat yourself. After my breast cancer op I decided to treat myself to a really scrumptious skin product - Monsia Skincare. You should treat yourself.
I really like the color of your hair and they way you wear it up.

starlamelissa
January 19th, 2015, 08:52 AM
You look really curvy and cute. Dont worry about a thing!

cathair
January 19th, 2015, 09:22 AM
Your hair is stunning :thud: and 35lb is no small achievement! I hope you can give yourself a break, you look just fine :)

librarychick
January 19th, 2015, 04:39 PM
My personal 'cure' for bad photos is to ask my SO what he thinks. If he makes a face and says "That's a bad pic" then that's what he means - THAT pic is bad. 9:10 his response is "It's just you in a picture" or "You look great". And then he follows that up with a cuddle and some lovely (maybe not appropriate for public/forums) compliments that boost my self esteem a bit. He knows I tend to only ask him those sort of questions when I'm feeling a bit down on myself, and he sure knows the cure to that problem, lol.

I'm not always comfortable with the way I look, but my esteem has come a long way since I was in high school. TBH I like my body more now, despite maybe more than a few extra pounds. I also love that my SO honestly doesn't notice the difference between me now and me +/- 10lbs, it's just not on his radar. That helps me give myself some perspective.

petcrazy18
January 19th, 2015, 04:48 PM
Everyone has their days where they just aren't feeling beautiful, we all suffer through moments like that. But I'm here, as well as everyone else, to tell you that you are beautiful girl. With a capital B :). You've got it all going for you and you can see that even in the few pictures you gave us. :spam: Crush anybody that tells you different ;)

monaaa75
February 20th, 2015, 11:09 AM
you crazy women, you look very pretty to me. invest in brow pencil and learn how to use it, i think it will make a big difference to your face, apart from that nothing needs to be changed ;)

mindwiped
February 20th, 2015, 03:13 PM
Since the topic got revived...have you considered increasing your calcium/vit D intake when you're in the PMS part of you cycle. It's been shown to help with mood: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/10763903

Especially since you used the phrase, this part of the year...low vit D will increase depression symptoms, and the northern hemisphere isn't getting the right wavelengths to trigger your own vit D production right now. When tested, all but the few who are on supplemental calcium/vit D or huge milk consumers are typically low enough to register clinically by this point in our winter.

kitschy
February 20th, 2015, 09:16 PM
you crazy women, you look very pretty to me. invest in brow pencil and learn how to use it, i think it will make a big difference to your face, apart from that nothing needs to be changed ;)
I prefer her pretty natural eyebrows, but I dislike painted on faces, especially drawn on brows. To me they're clownish - I guess it's just me.

kitschy
February 20th, 2015, 09:17 PM
double post

hidetheice
February 20th, 2015, 09:53 PM
I prefer her pretty natural eyebrows, but I dislike painted on faces, especially drawn on brows. To me they're clownish - I guess it's just me.


I don't like the drawn on look either. But they make what I call "eyebrow mascara" that looks way more natural and just helps enhance the eyebrows. Eyebrows make such a difference in your overall look...
http://www.ulta.com/ulta/browse/productDetail.jsp?productId=xlsImpprod11351215
Something like this is really easy to use and natural looking

Beckstar
February 20th, 2015, 11:37 PM
you're gorgeous! I want to grow up to be that 'ugly'! :)

animetor7
February 21st, 2015, 01:03 AM
You are GORGEOUS!! You hear me? Gorgeous!! You have the most beautiful smile and a sparkle to your eyes. And while I don't think you need to lose any weight, 35lbs is nothing to sneeze at. We all have those days, but you have nothing to worry about!

kitschy
February 21st, 2015, 05:56 AM
I don't like the drawn on look either. But they make what I call "eyebrow mascara" that looks way more natural and just helps enhance the eyebrows. Eyebrows make such a difference in your overall look...
http://www.ulta.com/ulta/browse/productDetail.jsp?productId=xlsImpprod11351215
Something like this is really easy to use and natural looking

The point I was trying to make is that your idea of darkened eyebrows being attractive is not everyone's ideal. Telling someone to go paint on eyebrows is kinda rude IMO, even if it is "softer". It would be like me telling you you need to cut your hair in order to be attractive. Just should not be done and is not KNIT.

MsVenus
February 21st, 2015, 08:58 AM
You should feel proud of yourself. You are a BEAUTIFUL woman. You have lovely hair, a gorgeous smile, and an abundance of womanly assets that many women would die to have.
Feel PROUD of what you have. I think it is interesting that you have an avatar of the Goddess yet you say something like this. Female is beautiful in her natural form. She does not have to adhere to anyone else's standards of beauty. There are many forms of beauty created by the Goddess and we are indeed all beautiful just the way we are.

Why don't you start each day naming something about yourself that you like and celebrate that aspect of yourself all that day. Maybe you like your fingernails or your hair. Do something special to your nails or your hair that day to show them appreciation for the beauty the universe has shared with you. Like attracts like. I personally think the more we focus on what we like about ourselves, the more the universe will grant us in exchange for our appreciation.

Celebrate yourself.

Fairlight63
February 21st, 2015, 10:21 AM
WOW - I think that you & your hair is REALLY beautiful!

wrinkledamanda
February 22nd, 2015, 02:43 AM
Whoa, I was not expecting that! I saw no flaws at all!!!!! When I opened the pics, I saw your gorgeous hair, amazing cheekbones and smile. Wow. You are gorgeous.

MsVenus
February 22nd, 2015, 05:07 AM
This is actually really sad that this culture places standards on women that we have to have the weight of pre-pubescent girls. We are expected to maintain the weight of girls who have not become women yet in order to be attractive. How is that even possible to take away the beauty that nature has given you because the men of your culture don't appreciate it? Why would the men want women to not look like full grown women? iMO a lot of the men setting beauty standards of women in Hollywood are homosexuals who do not desire women. They desire boys. So obviously they are not attracted to hips or bosoms. This is probably at the root of the problem. But it is negatively affecting the self confidence of beautiful women, who are told they should have the bodies of little boys or prepubescent girls. That is entirely incorrect imo. I think these men should be axed from those positions and the jobs should be filled by women with a different image of female beauty. Let those guys go over to setting the standards of beauty for boys -who they do find attractive in their natural state.

Notice that certain other cultures like the Latinos DO value females having womanly curves. They tend to promote images of women with ALL the curves of a woman including but not limited to breast implants. For the American standard of beauty, the ideal tends to look like a little girl with breast implants as opposed to a full figured real female.

endlessly
February 22nd, 2015, 01:53 PM
I know what you're going through and honestly, PMS-ing makes it all seem a million times worse and then when you add that you already feel poorly, it just seems impossible. But, don't be like me and make any drastic changes to your hair - especially bangs - I did that when I wasn't at my best and it was a huge, colossal mistake!

AZDesertRose
February 22nd, 2015, 02:02 PM
You look lovely in those photos. I think it was just the hormones talking; it happens to pretty much all of us sometimes. You're very pretty and you have a beautiful smile.

gwenalyn
February 22nd, 2015, 02:05 PM
iMO a lot of the men setting beauty standards of women in Hollywood are homosexuals who do not desire women. They desire boys. So obviously they are not attracted to hips or bosoms. This is probably at the root of the problem. But it is negatively affecting the self confidence of beautiful women, who are told they should have the bodies of little boys or prepubescent girls. That is entirely incorrect imo. I think these men should be axed from those positions and the jobs should be filled by women with a different image of female beauty. Let those guys go over to setting the standards of beauty for boys -who they do find attractive in their natural state.


WOAH. Gay men are not attracted to boys. You, ma'am, are thinking of pedophiles.

Amahaitz
February 23rd, 2015, 02:28 PM
What a surprise to see my post show up again! First, thank you to everyone who was so kind about my appearance and my state of mind. I was having a really bad time emotionally when I posted (PMS, holidays, family, etc.), and for some reason whenever I am sad or stressed or anything at all is bothering me, I start obsessing about how I look and everything wrong with it. It's completely idiotic--a) that's not what's really wrong at all, b) how one looks is not the most important thing in the world anyway, or even in the top 1000 things, really. I know that and I know objectively what I'm doing, but I still do it and I am now 45 years old. It is not as bad as when I was younger, and maybe it will go away completely the older I get :)

I love the Willendorf Venus (my avatar) so much. I think she's beautiful, and I love everything she represents. I would really love to look like that and be completely comfortable with myself and my body. Sometimes I feel like I'm getting there, but more often I feel like it's beautiful when other women look like that, but not me. It's strange.

MagicalMystery
February 23rd, 2015, 04:06 PM
At first glance, all I saw was a gorgeous woman with a radiant smile. :)

elvenelk
February 23rd, 2015, 04:10 PM
Georgeus smile with kind eyes is all I saw :)

RavennaNight
February 23rd, 2015, 07:27 PM
You have a vibrant smile and a light in your eyes! Don't put yourself down this way. You are beautiful! And I don't know what you're talking about with your forehead?

SunlightShines
February 23rd, 2015, 08:30 PM
You are beautiful just as you are! Unfortunately, we all have days when we don't like things about ourselves. I spent quite a bit of my life trying to be something better... prettier clothes, perfect hair, lean muscles, etc. But, I was never happy with myself. Then I realized, how could I be happy when I was talking to myself like that! I was criticizing myself in a way that I would never do to another person. So I decided to stop. Instead of looking in the mirror and saying " I need to...! I stop myself and switch my words to "I am...and then compliment myself. Some days I still slip up, but hey...I'm not perfect! I gave that up to be beautiful! Just like you are!

Safira
February 24th, 2015, 12:06 AM
You're not ugly. You have so beautiful smile and lightness in your eyes (and beautiful eyecolor). Don't be so hard on your self.

Shibe
February 25th, 2015, 08:10 PM
Might you have body Dysmorphia? I have it to a mild degree and always see myself as huge- even though I'm actually what people describe as skinny and petite. I don't see what others see, you may be seeing your old self and not your new self.

Lady melissa
February 26th, 2015, 12:40 AM
When i have an outbreak of acne, i tend to feel very very ugly....lately i try to resist touching my acne and it calmed down a lot....but there remain a lot of bumps under my skin and i have lately a lot of blackheads, more than ever before...yesterday i couldn't resist and now my skin has inflamed again...i feel bad again...

horribleatnames
February 26th, 2015, 05:22 AM
You. Are. BEAUTIFUL!

oOoAMANDAoOo
February 27th, 2015, 12:33 PM
Have you considered Botox? If your wrinkles are bothering you, then maybe you should try it. There was a recent article about how Botox has been shown to boost confidence and self esteem. I'm a Botox-er. Not full out, heavy, can't-change-my expression Botox, but a very conservative Botox. Every few months, I get lightly Toxed in my trouble areas, and instantly I feel a little more confident and my look is refreshed.

Or maybe you give it a week and let the PMS pass. That may do the trick right there. Last week I was pretty much all doom & gloom because of my cycle. This week, I'm right as rain.

Meteorite
February 27th, 2015, 01:00 PM
I don't understand how you possibly see yourself as ugly - you're not! You're photogenic.
I can relate a little, though. If it's any help, I have read somewhere that cameras add around 15 pounds to your weight.