Should I finally go for a trim?

[daredevil14]

Ok here's the thing, I am not happy anymore with my BSL wavy/curly hair, its density is decreasing, ends are always messy and thin. I've been growing my hair for 4 years and a few months now (I am a guy, I started from a typical guy cut). I look at girls curly hemlines, they are pretty full and thick. Well, mine is nothing anymore, the hemline is too thin.

3 questions:

1) How can I differentiate a thin hair (and hemline) which is due to the natural density of my hair from unnatural reasons?

2) Should I finally go for a trim? (I only trimmed once during all these years)

3) I also want to differently part my hair, I have been parting it in the middle for years now, I want to change that tomorrow. Will this change anything?

Here's a pic I took it last year, I had no concerns of thin hair and ends back then:

https://fbcdn-sphotos-b-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-xpa1/v/t1.0-9/s720x720/1234931_10153272557070338_677111981_n.jpg?oh=68476 8f8626f671d256759de78b41af6&oe=54DC6F30&__gda__=1427855496_2239d415aa7f472a46e8d0f97948cce c

[Madora]

Those are some curls you have, daredevil 14!

If you go to a salon to have the trim done (as opposed to doing it yourself i.e. Feye's self trimming method), then be sure the salon knows how to deal with curly hair! Also, bring a tape measure or ruler with you and SHOW the technician exactly how much you want trimmed. Just don't tell. SHOW THEM!

As far as parts go, a side part is really more aesthetically pleasing. The center part more or less "cuts your head in two" and is not as appealing as a side part. Side parts are also better for you, especially a right side part, because when you part your hair on the side, the follicles have to work just a little harder (which is good).

Also, you might experience some scalp pain with a change of parts. It can hurt like hell, so don't be surprised. This happens because the follicles are being drawn in a different direction, rather than parted smack down the center. Center parts are also not hair friendly, as over time, they can widen with repeated partings. It doesn't happen to everyone, but it is something to consider if you are going to center part for years to come!

Being that your hair is very curly, then the best way to protect it would be to keep it moisturized. You probably do this already, judging from the quality of your hair in your photo. Also, to protect those fragile ends, try and wear it up..or braided. Loose hair is subject to a lot of wear and tear..and tangles/mats which only incur more mechanical damage as you try to keep your hair tangle free.

[daredevil14]

Thank you for the great tips, will see what to do!

[ZeppHead]

Do you plan on growing longer? Some have successfully thickened up a hemline by very small regular trims or maintaining your length for a while and seeing if that makes a difference. It may take a while but if it does help you can then continue with your journey. Also my personal experience with changing a part wasn't successful. I wore a center part my whole life and after a few months of trying to change that I gave up. No matter what I did it always fell back to a center part. I tried sleeping, showering and wearing it up with a side part. Nope.:confused: Obviously I was doing something wrong I don't know. Good luck!

[spidermom]

Look up the compact trim method (it starts with a ponytail on the top of your head). I think that curly hair generally looks better with a bit or layering rather than cut straight across.

[cat11]

^ I have to disagree with this opinion because I personally think curly hair looks great straight across and it helps weigh it down

I do think you should get a trim though :) Curly hair is vulnerable and if you allow the ends to split with no maitenence (trims) it can travel up the shaft and cause more damage. I would definately get a trim, not a big one though, like 1/2 inch every year.

[daredevil14]

Thank you all for the appreciated replies.

So I tried to part my hair a few hours ago, damn what a mess it was! After 1 hour and a half, I could easily just repart it to how it was in seconds lol. Plus, I had some unwanted frizzy volume, it is also too hard to wear it down as I will hair all over my face. My face itself looked better though. Back to the middle I guess...

As for trimming, I will see what to do with the upcoming days. Well to exactly describe the situation, I carefully examine my ends, most of them are already thin, so I imagine them in my head trimmed, what would be the difference? Nothing, just a loss of length. Am I imagining right?

As for my 1st question, I hope someone answers it!

[mira-chan]

I can switch my part easily. I usually do it right after washing on wet hair. It dries into the new part and stays. Most have an easier time doing this than others though.

[spidermom]

As to differentiating whether thinning at the bottom is due to natural or unnatural causes - if there is a lot of damage (split ends, white dots, etc), then the bottom is probably thinning because hairs are breaking off due to damage.

However, a lot of times the hair at the bottom is thinner because some hairs grow faster than others, which is completely natural. My research has shown that every follicle on your head has its own growth cycle. One hair might grow 1 inch a month while the hair right next to it grows only 1/3 inch per month. So of course the first hair is going to get long much faster than the second. In addition, some hairs have a growth cycle of 6-10 years while other hairs only grow for a few months to 1 year before they shed out. So that is another natural reason for uneven, thin ends.

[Chromis]

Do you plan on growing longer? Some have successfully thickened up a hemline by very small regular trims or maintaining your length for a while and seeing if that makes a difference. It may take a while but if it does help you can then continue with your journey. Also my personal experience with changing a part wasn't successful. I wore a center part my whole life and after a few months of trying to change that I gave up. No matter what I did it always fell back to a center part. I tried sleeping, showering and wearing it up with a side part. Nope.:confused: Obviously I was doing something wrong I don't know. Good luck!

You are not alone Zepp! Mine is super stubborn too. I eventually decided it knows better than I do and gave up trying to change it.

Daredevil - Great curls! For distinguishing between normal thinning at the ends from wear and tear versus allover thinning, I think ponytail circumference is a pretty good measure.

I self trim my ends if they are getting too thin (if they are getting so wispy that my night braid tail is getting longer because they are too annoying to braid down to the last couple of inches). I find for thickening the ends, taking off just a bit at a time has worked really well for me. Usually I trim less than an inch and see a remarkable difference! I am a big fan of the self trim, but I defer to your fellow curlies as to which method would work best.

[QMacrocarpa]

1) When you're gaining length, the ends naturally get thinner. If you maintain at a length for a while, that will thicken the ends some. For more details, see this excellent video explanation (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3G4RyJMKtTc).

2) My hair is somewhat similar to yours in the photo (but mine's much thinner!). I self-trim (http://feyeselftrim.livejournal.com/) mine just a little bit every six months, because if I don't the ends split and start breaking off. I can get into a situation where my hair breaks off as fast as it grows. I prefer my hair without layers.

3) Whenever I do a self-trim, I part my hair in the center, but generally I mix up my part location from week to week or month to month. I generally change my part immediately before a wash by detangling my dry hair with a tangle teezer, then using a hairstick or similar thing (tail-end of a rat-tail comb, say) to gently "draw" the new part starting at my forehead and working back, and then gently move my hair into the new position. Then I wash my hair, which helps it settle into the new parting, and after washing carefully re-straighten the part if it got a bit wonky during washing. If the hair that got moved still seems to be sitting a little funny, I'll let my hair air-dry in a headband to make sure the new part stays in place.

[vega]

Hi dare devil have a look atfReyes method that what I do and hav similar hair as yours doing it yourself you control how much you take off , many stylists I've been to have no idea how to cut curls and I always used to lose slot of length thanks to them

[CurlyCap]

Hey daredevil 14,

1. Your hair looks dry and the curls look undefined. What is your routine?
Either a drying 'cleanse routine' or inadequate use of products after cleansing the hair will leave curly hair dry, which leads to brittleness and breaking. Undefined curls mean more individual strands can go their own way and cause mayhem and tangles. Defined curls are not only sought after because they are "pretty", but because they add a little order to the chaos, which long term increases length retention. Unlike straight hair, most curly hair never gets oily (and I've rarely even heard of a curly scalp getting oily), and so additional oil/products must be added to the hair to add back moisture and suppleness. It's an entirely different rule book to hair care in some ways and may take some experimentation to figure out what your hair wants. My routine is in my blog and their is the entire curly girl thread.

2. While some people grow and grow without trimming, I find that it's a no-go for curly hair.
Our hair already likes to tangle and when you mix in velcro or split ends, you get extra tangles, which eventually leads to strand breakage (via detangling, cutting tangles out, or having them ripped out in frustration). Trim regularly, but not overly much and your clumps are less likely to tangle, and so you preserve length. I trim 1" every 6 months. It's the best balance I've found between regular trims and not having to cut too much off when you trim. Learn to trim your own hair, clump by clump. Most hairstylist have no idea what they are doing and with the new Deva Cut fad, lots of them are trying to fake the funk.

4. Yes, I think you need a trim.
But don't try to fix it all in one go. How about trimming 1" every 4 months for the next two years? You'll get plenty of new length and your hemline will eventually thicken up. In between trims, focus on learning how to get the healthiest hair possible.

5. Set your part when your hair is wet, then apply your products.
Curl hair catches on itself, which makes it difficult to reset a part when your hair is dry but easy to "lock in" a part when your hair is wet. Part your hair as wanted, then twist a few of the canopy clumps underneath some deeper clumps. They'll get stuck there as your hair dries and your new part will be locked in. But yes, as Madora said, it may hurt if you've never moved your part before.

6. Do you wear your hair up? If so, how?
You can measure your thickness by measuring the circumference of your ponytail nearest the scalp. Changes in circumference near the scalp are usually due to shedding. Changes in circumference as you move down the ponytail are usually due to breakage along the length. Constantly wearing your hair in a ponytail will cause breakage near the scalp preventing the canopy and nape hairs from growing longer. Have you experimented with hair sticks, spin pins, or silk ties? Updos need not be curly, and gorgeous hair is universal.

Hope that helps.

[daredevil14]

I am really happy to read all your answers!

CurclyCap, to answer your questions:

1) What I usually do is getting in the shower (co-washing once a week with a non-silicone conditioner), wetting my hair, applying the conditioner and trying to cleanse my hair, rinsing and then starting to comb with my hands as much as possible while re-wetting and re-applying the same product, then I rinse out everything after my hair is combed. After that, I start working on my hair as parts, rewetting them and applying coconut oil. On non-co-washing days, I only wet the strands I feel that have become dry, recomb them and re-oil them.

What I usually get after shower: either a very thin hair due to the stands remaining half-dry to wet with a longer length (I try to control the amount of oil as much as possible) or a very thick head of hair but with extremely undefined curls or something in between (which can I easily re-wet the parts I don't like): bottom line, it's a mess! I tried changing products, going for silicones, my hair has always and will always be the same!

2) Yes, I wear my hair in a ponytail most of the time (I live in a not-so-cool area and country for long haired guys). However, my ponytail circumference is very wide when I look at it from behind!

I am helpless!

[Madora]

Daredevil14, to help keep your hair moisturized..and help with detangling, and taming the frizzies, you might want to look into using a few drops of Mineral Oil (aka baby oil). It is very lightweight, leaves no after scent, and washes out easily in your next shampoo, and its dead cheap. Johnson and Johnson makes a great baby oil (be sure the ingredients are just the MO plus a fragrance. Additives make the MO less effective).

You apply the drops of MO to your palms, not directly to your hair.

Works best on hair that has been clarified first, but you can use it on damp (not wet) hair too.

Use it sparingly...maybe 3 drops to begin with, due to the very curly nature of your hair. Do not use it in conjunction with any other oil/cream, etc. MO works best when used by itself.

[CurlyCap]

DD14,

My first guess is that coconut oil (or ANY oil) alone is not enough. It doesn't lock enough moisture into your hair and it doesn't protect your curls enough between washes. While people vary their routines based on what their hair likes, basically you need need to use products to both lock in moisture and to groom the hair into nice clumps. Clumps don't just magically form by themselves, and stay together, just by getting them wet.

Take a look at this video:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BDR_hTSgCiI

Do you see how after the first two products, her hair basically hangs in strings? That leads to defined curls. The twirling step is a bit labor intensive and only is really worth it if you are a large diameter 3b or 3a. People with smaller diameter curls (sharpie into pencil sized) sometimes skip this step because it's not needed.

Based on your above post and working with products you already have:
1. Spread coconut oil on your hands. Rake it through your damp hair.
2. Liberally spread your silicone free conditioner through your hair, sectioning your hair if needed to make sure you coat every curl
3. Try to add an alcohol free gel if you have one. If not, skip this step.
4. Try the twirling the first time. Just to go full out and see what it looks like.
5. Let your hair air dry. NO TOUCHING. Resist the urge to put it up for convenience.
6. Try to separate your curls a bit. Just to learn a bit more about grooming curls.

While the myth is that curls are wash and go, it's totally false. On LHC especially, people put a great deal of care into their curls and that's why their so amazing. But I think it's all worth it. Taking care of curly hair is nothing like taking care of straight hair, but the payoff is it looks pretty amazing when it's healthy.

[CurlyCap]

As for ways to wear your hair up, head over the Conventional Products forum. It seems most guys like hair sticks, just because they tend not to be as girlified as a lot of the LHC-preferred forks. But Jeter makes simple, awesome forks that I think would be perfectly acceptable to male fashion.

[daredevil14]

CurlyCap,

Unfortunately, I washed my hair today before I read your reply. I followed a simple routine, combing while wet and saturated with conditioner, applying some coconut oil, rinsing out everything and applying a very small amount of the conditioner and the oil after that... and let everything hair dry!

The result: a thick head of hair, large, yet undefined clumps of curly hair! This is what I don't like! Now, I didn't understand your process that much, you're saying:

1) Wet my hair and co-wash
2) Apply coconut oil
3) Reply the conditioner and comb(?)
4) Twirl each strand
5) Do a final rinsing(?) without any product to apply after(?)

All what I want is: thick hair AND defined curls! Either I get the first without the 2nd, or the 2nd without the first or none! (Yes, it happens!) I rarely get both.

[bumblebums]

For defining curls, have you tried the tightlycurly method? The difference between her approach and yours is no rinsing or twirling, you just comb the conditioner through your hair with a Denman brush and leave it alone. The conditioner helps the curls clump while drying, and when the hair is fully dry, you can shake it out if you like.

http://tightlycurly.com/welcome

For a trim, I would suggest finding a salon that caters to African American hair and asking them to trim it for you. It needs to be done dry, and by someone who understands curly hair. If you live within a close commute to a DevaChan salon and can spring the money for a trim there, that would be another option.

[Annalouise]

1) When you're gaining length, the ends naturally get thinner. If you maintain at a length for a while, that will thicken the ends some. For more details, see this excellent video explanation (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3G4RyJMKtTc).

.............

Thank you QMacrocarpa for that genius video! GENIUS!
If I understood that concept when I first started growing my hair I would have reached the lengths I wanted MUCH sooner.
The reason why is because when people fail to understand this concept about hair growth, they keep trimming their 'thin' ends thinking
that they are 'damaged' or that they just look bad when in fact, if they keep trimming those ends they will NEVER reach their goal.
This is a most important concept for people with i and ii hair on the thin side. What did she say, only 15 % of your hair will be at the longest length.
Exactly, so if your hair is thin, then imagine 15% of it is much thinner. So of course your ends will be thin!

And if you want to grow your hair long and you don't have a TON of it, then you will have to grow to love the thin ends. At least until you get to the length you want, and THEN you start regular trimming to thicken it up.

But if you trim BEFORE you reach the length you want, then you'll never get to that length.

I hope that makes sense.

[CurlyCap]

CurlyCap,

Unfortunately, I washed my hair today before I read your reply. I followed a simple routine, combing while wet and saturated with conditioner, applying some coconut oil, rinsing out everything and applying a very small amount of the conditioner and the oil after that... and let everything hair dry!

The result: a thick head of hair, large, yet undefined clumps of curly hair! This is what I don't like! Now, I didn't understand your process that much, you're saying:

1) Wet my hair and co-wash
2) Apply coconut oil
3) Reply the conditioner and comb(?)
4) Twirl each strand
5) Do a final rinsing(?) without any product to apply after(?)

All what I want is: thick hair AND defined curls! Either I get the first without the 2nd, or the 2nd without the first or none! (Yes, it happens!) I rarely get both.

Step 3: Move the conditioner through with your fingers, not a comb. Watch the video.
No step 5. All of it stays in your hair.

People with straight hair sometimes are like "Why did you wash your hair and then put all that stuff in it?" Whatever, it works.

[nakima]

your hair looks healthy to me and you know with your hair type once you trim and inch it's going to shrink up quite a bit. I love your hair the way it is and I feel that if you can just get past this and maybe micro trim and or s&d it's going to look awesome in a few months. This is just my opinion:) lovely curls and they just get better as they get longer. Oil it and maybe get a humidifier for added moisture. Good Luck!

[lapushka]

Step 3: Move the conditioner through with your fingers, not a comb. Watch the video.
No step 5. All of it stays in your hair.

People with straight hair sometimes are like "Why did you wash your hair and then put all that stuff in it?" Whatever, it works.

I'm a wavy and for a wavy I leave quite a bit of stuff in there as well. Not as much as a truly curly, but still... it's more than enough. My hair is double-conditioned, then I'm a fan of the LOC method.