Newbie needs encouragement

[kjm777]

​Hi everyone, basically I have been trying to grow my hair for 4 years ! But it is still in a chin length bob, which is due to too many bad haircuts. I really want to grow it as I'm so miserable with my hair, even just below shoulder length would give me my confidence back. My issue is in order to achieve this I know I have to avoid going to the hairdressers for a year. I have never done this and I am quite scared ! Can I please hear from others who have not had a haircut for approx a year just for reassurance that my hair will be OK. At the moment it is in good condition, I trim split ends only and wash about 3 times a week with a sulphate free shampoo. Thankyou !

[Quasiquixotic]

I've been there. I think the distance between pixi/bob and bun-able length is the hardest. Many people here have done it. I think it's best to put it up or out of the way however you can and don't cut it. I'm about a year from my last pixi and I only had my hair cut once last Christmas. That was before I found LHC or I wouldn't have done even that one trim. Buy yourself a pretty toy ever time you want to cut it. Some you can wear now and some you need to grown into. It's all about remembering your goal and focusing on what you want not what it is currently.

Just remember hair grows. It's what it does. All you have to do is NOT cut it. :grouphug:

[cathair]

Your hair will be absolutely fine :) Many people have not cut for her year here. What is it exactly that scares you about not cutting?

[Madora]

Your hair will be absolutely fine :) Many people have not cut for her year here. What is it exactly that scares you about not cutting?

I agree with cathair and I'm curious too, why do you fear avoiding hairdressers? Peer pressure? Fear that your style is not up to date? Etc. etc.

Just remember it is YOUR hair and you can do what you please with it. Since it is in good condition, keep up the good work and be patient growing it longer. Many of us here don't visit hairdressers at all..and our hair is just fine. There's nothing wrong going to a hairdresser, but you have to be careful that your hairdresser understands YOUR wants and so forth.

For the record, it has been over 13 years since my last haircut and I can now easily sit on my hair. Good luck on your hair journey, kjm777!

[kjm777]

I have been brain washed into thinking I have to go to the hairdressers every 8 weeks ! Or my hair will be a disaster. But I am sick of bad haircuts and want to take control over my own hair.

[LadyStrange]

I entirely agree with Madora up here. It's your hair, so you can do with it what you please (unless you have a job that restricts that kinda stuff). The only person that can make you feel bad or afraid is yourself, so don't let others or your thoughts of society's potential views of you change your goal :)

[two_wheels]

You'll be ok. Extreme laziness has meant that I have forgotten to get mine cut for over a year in the past. *And* I was rough with it and it still grew. I haven't cut since November now and it's grown a lot. Focus on other things and you will get there :)

[Johannah]

You can go without hairdressers for years if you take care of your hair. And you'll learn on this forum how you need to do that.

Welcome! :blossom:

[Madora]

I have been brain washed into thinking I have to go to the hairdressers every 8 weeks ! Or my hair will be a disaster. But I am sick of bad haircuts and want to take control over my own hair.

Good for you, kjm777! Nuthin' wrong with that! And remember, you don't need a ton of stuff to have beautiful, healthy hair! And just think, by avoiding hairdressers you are saving yourself a bundle of $$$ in the process. Go for it!

[cathair]

Every 8 weeks is pretty frequent. Cheering for you :cheer: you're hair will be fine, you can do it! :)

[kjm777]

Thanks for the encouragement ;) Felt so down about my hair a couple of weeks ago I nearly had hair extensions, now I am so glad I didn't !

[Panth]

My last hair cut was ... oh, I don't know? At least a year ago? I do S&D my braid tassel occasionally, though (S&D = "search and destroy" = basically, cutting off any VISIBLE split ends one by one with a pair of very sharp scissors that are only used for hair, but not cutting anything else).

My last visit to a hairdresser was probably over 10 years ago.

My hair is fine. No trims is fine (provided you keep an eye on things and don't do anything excessively damaging, e.g. bleach+dye+daily flat ironing). Please don't get extensions if you can help it - they often damage the hair, making it harder to grow out in the long run. It takes a lot of patience to get long hair, and particularly to put up with the pixie/bob-to-ponytailable stage. However, you'll get through it!

[lilin]

​Hi everyone, basically I have been trying to grow my hair for 4 years ! But it is still in a chin length bob, which is due to too many bad haircuts. I really want to grow it as I'm so miserable with my hair, even just below shoulder length would give me my confidence back. My issue is in order to achieve this I know I have to avoid going to the hairdressers for a year. I have never done this and I am quite scared ! Can I please hear from others who have not had a haircut for approx a year just for reassurance that my hair will be OK. At the moment it is in good condition, I trim split ends only and wash about 3 times a week with a sulphate free shampoo. Thankyou !

Yes, it will be ok!

Think about it for a minute. How amazing is it that we've been sold on salons so completely that we're afraid to touch the hair on our own head? Or we're afraid to NOT have it touched, as though it will just fall out without a stylist fiddling with it once a month?

Women didn't have terribly, scraggly hair before the salon became socially mandatory. On the contrary, a lot of our home-caring older relatives had, or still have, very beautiful hair.

I haven't been to a salon in 6 years. My hair has never looked better. I've even gotten good at cutting it -- I cut a bob a couple times that looked pretty good. I do all my own trims (and even manage to trim my layers). And when I do, I only take off EXACTLY as much as I want, as opposed to the anxiety of a hairdresser taking off way too much.

I didn't cut AT ALL (not even trimming splits) for about 2 years before my splits got noticeably prevalent, and that was before I got serious about hair care. Just take care of your ends, and you'll be totally fine. :)

[PinkScarf]

I can totally relate! I maintained a bob for a year or two, but after a couple disastrous haircuts (does "no shorter than chin length" mean a pixie cut to you?!?!), I decided I wanted to grow my hair out long if only to avoid going to the hairdresser anymore! Haha. As Panth pointed out, the journey from pixie/bob to a ponytailable length can be a difficult one but once your hair is long enough to put up, you'll be glad you stuck it out! Best of luck to you! :)

[Gertrude]

I'm a newbie too and seem to prattle on about the " need" to trim my hair. But I don't have that " need" until my hair is at least two years old. And I have fragile fine hair. A chin length bob is under 6 inches, less than a year. I was recommended to cut my hair to a chin length blunt bob so it would grow out nicely without needing trims. Hair does grow unevenly so ends may look more fuzzy after a while but unless you see split ends at the bottom, in sunlight or strong artificial light there's nothing to worry about.

You can put hair up with a claw clip very quickly after chin length to protect it from damage, I found shoulder length hard, with the hair standing on the shoulders leading to splitting, but putting it up will avoid that.

Happy growing!

[Sarahlabyrinth]

kjm777, you CAN do it! Many of us here haven't been to a hairdresser for years. I think the last time I went to one for a trim was....March 2011.....

[RapunzelKat]

Welcome to LHC! :flower:

The only time you'd really need to visit a salon every eight weeks is to maintain a short cut. When mine was very short, I actually went every six weeks because the roots made me bonkers :D

However, when you're growing out there's no need. If your hair is sturdy, you can probably go a year or even more without any trims. If your ends get damaged easily, you can S&D or self trim, as others have mentioned. My hair requires trimming every three moths or so, but I haven't been to a salon in oh... Six years? :)

Just be patient and let your hair do its thing. It's totally worth it!

[Tini'sNewHair]

I found it very difficult to grow passed APL/BSL when i used to go to a hairdressing salon but once i met LHC, my hair grew like weeds and now I'm finally reaching hip length in whats been 7-8 years. I trim my own hair now using Feyes method, I also S&D and do gentle everyday care for my hair.

[stachelbeere]

secondning every one above about the fact that you don't need to go to the hairdresser. My last visit was in... early 2011. And with self-trims and rather slow growth my hair is at BSL right now, approaching MBL :D

I used to be like you - my hair NEVER grew past collarbone length, I went to a hairdresser and cut it back to chin because "I had to". But if you take good care of your ends and are gentle to your hair it will grow and you won't need to get it trimmed back.

[MeowScat]

I haven't been to the salon in almost 5 years and I'm really happy about it now. It freaked me out at first because I was used to going every few weeks. I've saved a ton of money, time and damage to my hair. I trim it myself now and I haven't even done that in over a year and a half.

I just kept telling myself that it takes some time to break old habits and start new ones. You can do it, and who knows, you just might get to a year of no salon and want to continue that way.

[Mya]

I have not seen hairdressers for a few years now, and honestly I and my hair are loving every minute of it! I think it will stay that way for the rest of my life. It feels good to gain back control over your hair. You learn to make your hair look good for what it is and not for being beaten into submission by makeovers. My hair now is very low maintainance and, even if I'm still recovering from bad layers and hair loss, it looks good, especially if compared to my previous hair. It gets better and better with time. Looking at old photos I always ask myself how on earth I could step out of home with that terrible hair. Avoiding the hairdresser can be not only a good choice but an enjoyable journey as well. Your hair will be totally fine! :blossom:

[momschicklets]

For years and years I've gone to the hairdresser every 6 to 8 weeks to get trims so I know how that habit gets seared into your brain. I haven't had a trim since last December, but the first couple of trims I missed it felt kind of weird. Now nearly 7 months later I can assure you it's not a big deal! My hair is healthy, happy and growing...and I've saved over $100 already. Unless you're just damaging the dickens out of it, it's just not necessary. Rest assured there are ladies here with gorgeous hair that haven't trimmed in years!

[AmyBeth]

I haven't seen a hairdresser since Dec '11. I trim my own hair, which would have terrified me before I found LHC. I even color with henna and indigo, which I really had never even heard of. It really does feel good to take care of it myself. When you decide you want long hair, it's nice to make the commitment and do what you can to make it happen without the interference of well meaning professionals who sometimes just don't "get it". For example, my last hairdresser knew that I wanted long hair, and supported that, but kept saying that I needed to trim the damage off (there wasn't much damage, but whatever) and then proceed to cut off all the progress I had made. If I wanted a more "artistic" cut, with layers and feathering, I would never attempt that myself. But a long blunt hemline is easy to do yourself!

[leilani]

think of all the cash you'll save! Buy a pretty hair toy or go to a nice restaurant every 8 weeks instead.

[lilin]

I have not seen hairdressers for a few years now, and honestly I and my hair are loving every minute of it! I think it will stay that way for the rest of my life. It feels good to gain back control over your hair. You learn to make your hair look good for what it is and not for being beaten into submission by makeovers. My hair now is very low maintainance and, even if I'm still recovering from bad layers and hair loss, it looks good, especially if compared to my previous hair. It gets better and better with time. Looking at old photos I always ask myself how on earth I could step out of home with that terrible hair. Avoiding the hairdresser can be not only a good choice but an enjoyable journey as well. Your hair will be totally fine! :blossom:

Definitely. It was really liberating for me to realize, "Oh, wait, this is MY hair. I can do, or not do, whatever I want with it! And it looks good just the way it is, without a stylist's 'do with heat and chemicals that never looks good again after the first wash."