Tons of questions.....

[Dalila747]

So...I am fairly new here and right now my hair is down to my waist. I have some damage, so I haven't decided yet if I'm going to cut it to shoulder length or not. That will be a separate thread I suppose. But I'm trying to be as gentle to my hair going forward. Here is my routine so far. Let me know what I'm doing right, wrong, etc.

Wash my hair every two or three days.
I have somewhat oily hair so by day two I usually resort to putting it in a pony tail with scunci no damage...I'm sure that is what is causing a bunch of the splint ends, breaks, and white dots I have around my shorter layers surrounding my face. So what can i use instead to keep my hair up? I'm not really a braid person (hair is to thick anyways). I'm thinking of getting those goody spin pins.
I dye my hair, have for years. And will continue to do so, there's no getting around that.
What else, oh, I rarely blow dry, maybe a few times a year, ditto with the flat iron.
Also, I have pretty straight hair, but I have all these shorter strands all over that don't lay flat. Is this just because of the texture of my hair or could this be a sign of damage?????? I hate those damn things. Especially the ones near my scalp that are shorter so they really stick up.

[FuzzyBlackWaves]

I'm not sure about putting it up because all I can do is a simple braid, bun and ponytail using a scrunchie or a no-metal hairband.
As for dying your hair, put coconut oil on it for a few hours before hand. Leave the oil in and colour over the top of it. The colour will take a bit longer to absorb but won't damage your hair as much. Also make sure to only dye your roots instead of your mid-lengths, and never the ends. Use the coconut oil once a week as a pre-wash treatment too. Switch to an SLS free shampoo or just use apple cider vinegar as a rinse. Make sure to use some deep conditioner. Either regularly get a trim or S and D the ends with sharp scissors. Try to stretch your washes if you can. Wear your hair up more often than not and use some kind of light oil to seal in moisture whilst it's still damp (but not wet) from the shower. Don't rub your hair with towels.
It could just be your texture (not all of your hairs grow at the same rate) or it could be where hairs have broken off. To me it sounds like you could benefit from either a couple of inches off or back to BSL, but I can't really comment without pictures.
I know how you feel, I had BSL length hair and a lot of split ends when I first came here. It can be frustrating working out a routine that's right for you, but once you've followed it long enough and cut off old damage you should start to see some real progress.

[melomane]

I've started using hair sticks and forks, having hair in a bun can protect the ends,

[Dalila747]

Here's a pic I just took. I'm kinda shocked, I didn't realize how pronounced my v shape is.https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/ZLduITHsZouJ8UuRmAzxdVOVWbam_6XYOV83BqTSrxg=w404-h539-no

[FuzzyBlackWaves]

Yeah, it looks like it's just your texture. It doesn't look too damaged. I'd probably take about an inch off if I were you then go through and S and D any left over damage further up. Your V shape is rather awesome.

[nobeltonya]

Your hair looks awesome, I think. :D I wouldn't cut it all the way to shoulder, even if it is damaged.. you can trim 2-3" off at a time and see how the ends are and the amount of splits.. the flyaways may just be your texture. I have them also, and I have yet to find a way to reduce them 100%.. regularly oil, youtube has tons of videos about various buns.. hair sticks would be good to invest in [you can get acrylic ones at Sally's for like $4], and spin pins are also very useful. :disco:

[Cania]

You say dye is non-negotiable, but in your other thread you talked about going red. Why not try henna?

[Dalila747]

You say dye is non-negotiable, but in your other thread you talked about going red. Why not try henna?

Well, most of my hair has been dyed black, so would henna work on dyed black hair to get to the coppery auburn shade I want?