New here.. desperately need hair help :(

[TheArgus]

Hi everyone- This is my first post on here :) I'm hoping I could get some words of advice.. I'm at my wits ends with my hair!! I've been trying to grow it long and regain it's healthiness and can't seem to make it happen and I'm not sure why :( I apologize for the long post in advance!!

A little background: I would say my hair type is 1b/F/ii. My hair was very healthy and shiny until I started using straightening irons and boxed black dye from about 2008-2011. It was waist length at the time, but it quickly became horribly damaged and broken.

In january 2012 I cut it to shoulder length bleached it almost platinum blonde. Ahh! Poor decisions. My hair is naturally dark brown. The bleaching damaged it horribly (as I knew it would haha), so I stopped the bleaching after only 2 months and had it dyed back to brown. I dyed it brown one more time in December 2012 just to even the color out, and haven't done anything "bad" to it since then.

So for the almost 2 years now I've been attempting to get it back to it's healthy state and have been treating it so nicely and carefully, yet I have made almost no progress!! I'm really confused and frustrated. I've been getting regular cuts for 2 years to get all the damage out, so logically I feel like all the damaged/dyed hair should be cut off at this point. However, the majority of my hair still looks and feels so damaged… even though it's new growth. It's insanely frizzy, and from mid-shaft to end is so thin. Plus I get tons of split ends even though I haven't dyed it or used heat tools in almost 2 years! For example: I just got 2 inches cut off on December 15 and my hair already had split ends and looked gross after 1 month.

I don't know what to do. Can bleaching permanently damage your hair follicle so that even new growth is damaged? I didn't think that was possible but I'm a little worried. I wash/condition my hair 3 times a week using Dove intensive damage shampoo and Keraphix conditioner. I only comb it with a wide tooth comb and I sleep with it in a braid. I've recently been trying avocado and coconut oil as a leave-in when it's damp, but haven't noticed much of an effect. I've been stuck at armpit length for about a year due to constant trimming.

Help!!! What am I doing wrong?? I would appreciate any words of advice :) thank you so much!!

[Kayto]

I have color damage as well. It will take a long time to grow out. I know its been a long time, but you dyed your whole head with bleach and dye and used heat, your hair is very broken. I lather lots, and i mean lots of coconut oil now on my hair and leave it on over night. How often do you wash your hair? I wash my hair once a week, if even that. It is good to stretch out your washes and provide your hair with more oil and natural oil. I would also suggest buying a shampoo and condish. that has lots of protein (only if your hair LIKES protein. I know protein is bad for some.) I use mane n' tale shampoo and conditioner and that stuff has been good to my hair. But its good to switch out your shampoos and conditioners every couple washes (IMO) my hair gets used to the products I use if I use them too often. Plus too much protein can leave your hair feeling crunchy or dry.

-Do you drink lots of water?
-do you take hair supplements? (biotin, daily vitamin, hair/skin/nails, prenatal?
-do you exercise?

a healthy body, mind, and diet can all affect hair growth. I would also wear protective hairstyles during the day. Hair grows at 1/2 an inch per month on average. Hair will not magically repair itself over time (though I wish it could) unless you really cut off all the dead ends. there is no fix except cutting it. theres no magical product unfortunately. I would suggest getting another major cut. Not just a few inches I'm thinking possibly to your shoulder. I know it seems like much -- but it will be worth it in the long run if you want healthy shiny hair again. Someone suggested to me to go on the growing out dye forum for support. =) I think that would help you a bit, too.

[meteor]

Welcome to the forum, TheArgus! :)
Has your hair always been prone to split ends (I mean, before the flat-iron and bleach)? Your hair is fine, so it's probably naturally more fragile.
Am I understanding correctly that all of your previously damaged hair is gone now? If not, the damage is still there and you can only patch-repair.

Fine, split-end prone hair tends to like hydrolyzed proteins, so you might want to do some protein treatments.

I'm glad you started oiling your hair. Oils help protect against some damage, for example from harsh cleansers in shampoo and hygral fatigue, so I really recommend doing oil treatments before washing it.

Try to wear hair up as much as possible. It really protects the ends from splitting.

I recommend sleeping on satin silk pillowcases and/or sleep caps. Try to ensure that only smooth surfaces are rubbing against your hair (careful with wool/flannel, velcro, zippers, turtle-necks).

If you ever use a brush, make sure it's a high quality one and that you use it correctly only on dry, detangled hair. Personally, I don't even use a brush. Many people (fineys, curlies, for example) do better only with finger-combing or with wide tooth combs.


Can bleaching permanently damage your hair follicle so that even new growth is damaged? I didn't think that was possible but I'm a little worried.

No, follicles don't get affected by bleaching hair. The only way the bleach could have damaged your follicles is if it was left on your skin, caused chemical burns and possible balding. Since that didn't happen, your new growth should not be affected at all.

[spidermom]

2 years is about 12 inches of growth, so measured from the top of the head, 12 inches would put your non-dyed, non-bleached hair at right about shoulder length, depending on how long your neck is, possibly barely touching shoulders. Therefore, you might still have several inches of damaged hair to trim away before you can call it good and gone.

Frizz often means that your hair is more wavy than you think, but you're disrupting the wave pattern with combing and brushing. Try combing/brushing before you wash your hair, leaving it hanging straight down as you wash and condition, taking care to mess your hair around as little as possible. Then let it air dry without touching it. This will show you how much natural wave or curl that you have.

[breezefaerie]

You have gotten some great advice here :)
I wanted to ask what products you are using?
Things that are heavy in cones can often build up, and things that are heavy in protein can often make hair feel dry and crunchy.

[TheArgus]

Thank you so much for the input everyone!! Making me feel a lot better :)

Spidermom- thank you for that measurement estimate. That's what I've been trying to figure out… if all of the bleach damage had been cut out and I somehow had created tons of new damage, or if this is mostly old damage that hasn't been cut off yet. Most of the damage is from my shoulder downwards so i'm hoping it's just bleach damage that I need to cut off.

Kayto- I wash my hair 3 times a week (I have super oily roots so that's the longest I've been able to stretch out my washes). I've been using Dove intensive repair shampoo for awhile, but just ran out and bought Redken all soft. I Haven't used it yet thought. For conditioner I use Nexxus Keraphix. I can't figure out if my hair likes protein or not though… I used to do protein treatments (Like Kpak) after I bleached it but couldn't tell if it was helping or making it more crunchy. Hmmm. I've been thinking of switching to a different conditioner but not sure whether to go the protein or non-protein route.

I drink TONS of water. I take a few supplements but not biotin because it makes my skin break out like crazy for some reason!

Meteor- My hair has always been a bit split end prone, but not nearly as much as it is now. Now I can tell I have so much breakage because my hemline is so thin and uneven which was never the case before I did all the dying/straightening

I tried doing an ACV rinse about 3 weeks ago. I did a 1:2 acv:water ratio and Im worried that was too much ACV because since then my frizz has been even worse. Yikes. I hope it calms down soon

Thank you all again!! So helpful :)

[lapushka]

I dyed it brown one more time in December 2012 just to even the color out, and haven't done anything "bad" to it since then.

So for the almost 2 years now I've been attempting to get it back to it's healthy state and have been treating it so nicely and carefully, yet I have made almost no progress!! I'm really confused and frustrated. I've been getting regular cuts for 2 years to get all the damage out, so logically I feel like all the damaged/dyed hair should be cut off at this point. However, the majority of my hair still looks and feels so damaged… even though it's new growth. It's insanely frizzy, and from mid-shaft to end is so thin. Plus I get tons of split ends even though I haven't dyed it or used heat tools in almost 2 years! For example: I just got 2 inches cut off on December 15 and my hair already had split ends and looked gross after 1 month.

December 2012 you dyed it last, which means it's 1 year ago, and a few months. Your "virgin" hair is only about ear-length by now, so the rest of it is still old damage that you will need to slowly grow and trim out. It doesn't happen that fast!

[Kayto]

Redken all soft is a pretty good conditioner. I used to use it. Continue to use that and give us an update on how you like it. =)

[spidermom]

December 2012 you dyed it last, which means it's 1 year ago, and a few months. Your "virgin" hair is only about ear-length by now, so the rest of it is still old damage that you will need to slowly grow and trim out. It doesn't happen that fast!

15 months would be about 7-1/2 inches of growth.

[ErinLeigh]

The best conditioner I have ever found for bleached damage hair is Redken Extreme Builder Plus.
I really stand behind this one for severe damage (not saying yours is that bad)

I think the best bet is to keep microtrimming off the bleached ends.

I got some nasty damage looking pretty decent by switching to satin pillowcases, wearing hair up as much as possible, using the coconut/avocado the night before washing as a pre shampoo treatment (I found the best results using it that way, protected hair during washing), cutting back on how often I used sulfates, adding some conditioner only washes into routine, using jojoba or argan post wash on damp hair to seal in moisture and really making sure I was using the right amounts of protein and moisture. All this really helped and now the Redken on top of it have been very good for my hair. It is awesome after clarifying especially.

Hair was so bad, broken and brittle I could not even comb it and now it is soft and split free. It been a lot of work (and a lot of trims) but it was nice to see I could not only stop things from getting worse, but actually make things better. I saw results within a month which was very encouraging.

I did stop cones for a while though just so my oils and conditioners could work better. In my opinion it did help but I know how tough it is to give up cones when hair feels fragile so I wouldn't want to sway anyone on that part. It is really just about babying the bleached parts and using ingredients that help bleached, damaged hair to keep them looking as good as possible until they can be removed.

[Shibe]

How long is your hair right now? How long was it when you dyed it last?

[HazelBug]

It looks like you have been given a lot of good advice! You are probably still dealing with bleach damage. It seems that we have similar hair types. My hair isn't as prone to splits though, but maybe I can help some? I tried the condition wash condition thing and it works really well for me. My ends are a lot softer. I also use coconut oil. Coconut oil will actually penetrate the hair shaft. I wear my hair up as much as possible with my ends tucked in. That way less mechanical damage can happen.

I might mention that trying harder to stretch washes may help you. Most people go through a more oily phase at first. But it usually gets easier after a week or two. I went from washing every other day and am now at 2 times a week. I'm hoping to go longer. If your hair just looks oily, braids can help hide it and scarves and other things. You can also make one of your washes in the week a water only wash. This really helped me since my scalp could feel a little more fresh without all the extra stuff going on my hair.

Another thing is that some people need to be trimmed with incredibly sharp scissors. A friend of mine has very fine delicate hair. She goes to one stylist who has her scissors sharpened before hand. If she isn't trimmed with crazy sharp scissors she gets tons of splits. If she doesn't trim she gets tons of splits. Your damaged ends are going to be more prone to damage so you need to be very careful with them.

The people here have been a ton of help to me already. So the others here probably have a lot more advice that could help you! So keep asking questions and you will figure this thing out. You've had long hair before, you can do it again!