how to get "silky" hair?

[Chocowalnut]

A couple girls I know have hair that is so soft that when I was braiding their hair its hard to even do it because it falls right out. My hair on the other hand isn't really silky like that. Its soft but not flowing and tangle free. Is it because I have some natural curl or something I'm doing wrong with my hair? Any one else have this problem?

[Nadine <3]

It's probably just your hair texture vs yours. I have silky hair like that and it's really annoying because nothing stays in it the first 2 days after I wash.My roommates hair though, is more course and rougher. I like to practice braiding on her because it stays much better,even right after she washes it.

[Firefox7275]

Hair that is coarse or kinky (not the same as curly, a tortion twist), damaged or with build up will generally not feel silky, there is a genetic element as well as a care element.

My hair is wavy and colour damaged so needs work to feel silky. The right products and ingredients from washing to leave in conditioner. It rarely feels silky if brushed or blow fried or shampoo'd. I've learned not to treat my hair as if it was straight even if wearing it that way - I still co-wash, leave in conditioner on dripping hair, use a microfibre towel and a super wide tooth comb.

[blue_eyes]

Silky hair is not all it's cracked up to be in my opinion haha my natural hair was so silky (and perfectly straight) that I could do nothing with it. I'd spend two hours curling it and in 5 minutes the curls would be gone and my hair would be perfectly straight again. It drove me insane. I began dyeing my hair and it took away the extreme silkiness. Now my ends are really damaged and I've had a lot of success with argan and grapeseed oils to make it softer :)

[mrs_coffee]

My hair is coarse and kinky in texture. The only time it was straighter and smoother was when I used henna, but it was never silky.

[SkyChild]

Yup I agree. As a child, it always made me cross that my best friend had long silky straight hair and mine was coarser and wavier. But it'll hold styles better. My hair was most silky after the first wash, after I didn't wash it for 5 months. Do you stretch washes? Argan oil is good for that silky feeling, though it's easy to overdo it and use too much!

[Leslieslsa]

I agree with everyone else, it is mostly texture. And I think (don't quote me on this because I have minimal curls when it's short) tend to be more course and sometimes more dry. And then you have to factor in the actual texture of your strands. I sometimes think that coarser hair is less prone to breakage, but I could be wrong.

[DweamGoiL]

The right mix of hair products can definitely promote silkiness in hair that leans more towards straight. But for some wavies and definitely curlies, the hair is never really silky. It can become very soft and smooth to the touch, but not silky. I have wavy hair that leans more towards straight rather than curly and sometimes getting anything to stay in my hair or the hair to grab when I need to bun it, becomes an ordeal. The variance in texture also makes such a huge difference in the way the hair catches the light. When I dry my hair wavy, the wavy parts (towards the bottom of the length) looks duller than the roots.

My 9 year old daughter has gorgeous curly hair down to her waist when it's wet, but when it's dry, it shrinks up to BSL. It is really healthy, but never looks really shiny and is never ever silky. It's just the way her hair is. But if left up to me, I would trade for her hair any day. I so love the curls!

[Diamond.Eyes]

I have fine hair so it feels pretty sleek naturally, but my hair feels the most silky right after I've clarified, ACV-rinsed, and let a natural conditioner conatining no -CONES sit on it overnight. Basically my hair feels the best without build-up.

[lapushka]

My hair has texture to it, a little, but it is still silky smooth. A lot of cones take care of that "problem"!

[Wosie]

My hair is coarse and it takes some effort to get it somewhat smooth to the touch. Right now my canopy (? the upper part of my head) feels silky but that's mainly thanks to sebum (two days since shampoo wash). My ends have never felt silky, but hopefully that'll change for the better the more I take care of my hair. I still have a hard time believing I'll ever think "my hair is so silky!" as I can't remember ever thinking like that. So much of it has to do with one's individual hair texture.

ETA: Something that works for me is one drop of jojoba oil once or twice a day. It makes my hair noticeably shinier. :bluesmile

[sarahthegemini]

Tbh a lot of it is down to texture. I have fine, wavy hair that pretty much always feels slippy and silky, but someone with coarser hair is going to have a harder job at making their hair silky. Don't compare your hair with theirs, there are great things about every hair type!

[sarahramen]

I've only ever got my hair to be silky once. It was after doing a deep conditioner treatment that Diamond.Eyes (posted earlier) talked about. I don't remember what it was exactly, but it involve mixing shea butter and oils in with your conditioner, warming it up and leaving it on for a while. My hair actually fell out of a braid! While my hair felt so soft and slippery it actually bugged me how uncooperative it was. I should do that treatment again, my ends are dry... If you notice this Diamond.Eyes, could you tell me the recipe?

[veryhairyfairy]

Agreeing with the general consensus that it comes down to texture for the most part. I have mostly medium strands, but probably about 25% are coarse, and I have a hair texture right in between wavy and straight; my hair never feels or looks smooth, slippy, or silky. :shrug:

The one product that time and again gives me the closest result to 'silky' is OIL. When I over oil, my hair is smooth and amazing, I wish it looked better to me! One way I get around that is to add oil to your rinse out conditioner like sarahramen mentioned. I make my own conditioner with this mix of behentrimonium methosulfate/cetearyl alcohol (http://www.ebay.com/itm/BTMS-Behentrimonium-Methosulfate-Emulsifying-Conditioner-/300664529512) and add about 2 teaspoons of safflower oil per cup of conditioner. (I'm going to double that for this next batch, wish me luck!) So far, with 2 teaspoons of oil in my conditioner I've noticed: increased shine, increased softness, decreased tangles/increased slip, and most importantly, no clumpy-ness from too much oil.

[maborosi]

Mine's F/M and very slippy and silky. This is both a blessing and a curse because it doesn't like to stay in updos when it's like that. Like at all. I have to spin-pin, elastic, and AVG the crap out of a bun when my hair's like that.

To get it there, usually I either CWC, I don't really shampoo much anymore, but when I do, it leaves my hair slippery soft, or do an SMT. The SMT, for me, is more of a humid month alternative because it contains honey. My silk sleeping cap also seems to make my hair more soft and slippy.

But a lot of it comes down to your texture and coarseness. If your hair is coarser, it's not as likely to be as slippery as someone whose hair is finer in texture.

~maborosi~

[sweet&sourkiwi]

I thought my hair was silky type (and no, I didn't like it!) but I think a lot of it comes down to products.

I was raised on clarifying shampoos, coney conditioners and warm blowdrying...a perfect recipe for silky hair! Throw in soft water and it was so silky it wouldn't do anything. If I use an acid rinse it's ridiculous! I just don't have enough hair for it to look good.

Unfortunately, the silkiness leaves me with no body, no hold, no texture...so I shampoo bar and cone-free condition to get a little more texture going! This radically changes my hair texture—much more body, poof, and grip. I think if I had more hair to work with and wanted to do a silky look, I would clarify, deep treat, ACV rinse and add a coney serum.

[AmyBeth]

I think it comes down to genetics for the most part. You can work with your texture or against it, but nature usually wins in the end. Mine is very silky naturally and I do love that aspect of it. Silicones help to maximize the silkiness and make detangling much easier. Silky hair does seem to tangle a lot.

[vanillabones]

For the most part I find people seem to desire this 'silky smooth hair'. Well... I have it 24/7 and it's not all it's cracked up to be. To me it's a pain in the butt and I'd prefer a more resilient and wavy or curly texture but the grass is always greener right? My hair slips out of ponytails of any size/position, any kind if claw clip in any position, any fork in any position (on a rare day itll stay :D but only if it's dirty), and braids are pretty much a joke with my slip and thinness.
The only thing it does.... reflect light. And if it gets sunbleached even that will diminish. Oh and my hair is hopelessly addicted to the coney goodness. I gotta have it but it's limited to only the conditioner on the length.