Hair Donations

[sunrider_bby]

Couple of months ago I watched a video from Torrinpaige Youtube channel about hair donation.

http://youtu.be/n1k5G4MPK7Q

I was shocked to hear that people call you selfish and so when you tell them you are not going to donate your hair. Where I live this does not happen. I mean, who cares? Who are this people to judge anybody?

While I respect people who donate their hair, and grow it for that purpose, I don't like other people judging when you don't do that.

Do any of you get asked if your are donating your hair? And what are the reactions you all get when telling you are not donating?

[Avenie]

I'm considering it, in the future, but then I read that most of the hair won't go to cancer patients (http://www.cancerresearchuk.org/cancer-help/about-cancer/cancer-questions/hair-donation-and-wigs)anyway. It is more likely to go to alopecia sufferers - which is fine. But the NHS won't give real wigs to sufferers, they'd have to buy them. So really, donating would just be supporting the regular wig industry and the hair is as likely to end up on the head of a wealthy fashionable wig-wearer than someone in need. I did find the Little Princess (http://www.littleprincesses.org.uk/)charity which aims to give a human wig to children with alopecia, but again, you basically donate your hair, it gets sent in a big batch to a factory in China, and then the factory sends back some wigs. Whether the donated hair is used or tossed (I appreciate a lot will be deemed unsuitable) or, who knows, sold to make hair extensions, is unknown (they claim not to sell it, so I guess that means it's either used or tossed. But your hair is still not guaranteed to go to a needy person.) I checked out the US 'Locks of Love' and it looks like they too may sell hair to the fashion industry, not all of it to charitable causes.

So basically, I'm going to look into a bit more but at the moment I'm worried that it's not really as simple as it's made out to be ('donate hair for kids with cancer to get free wigs'.) So if someone was not donating, I'd think that was a pretty good reason - "I haven't found an organisation that can guarantee my hair will be used that way."

But yes, it's yours to do with as you see fit, and no one should be criticised or judged for it, especially when it's not as crystal clear as someone accusing you may feel it is.

[restless]

Do any of you get asked if your are donating your hair? And what are the reactions you all get when telling you are not donating?

Where I come from, nobody ever asks that question. I was actually unfamiliar with the problem until I came on here and started reading about people getting bashed for not donating their long hair. In my world that phenomenon is just bizarre. How do those people reason when they judge men and women who have spent years and years on growing and loving their hair and talk down on them for not wanting to give it up? It especially upsets me when I read that the person who made the remark has short hair themselves and therefor "cant donate but totally would if they had long hair"- why in the world wont they grow their hair long then instead of keep cutting it in trendy hair styles?

Throughout the years Ive been donating plenty of things for charity (money, clothes, shoes, furnitures), Ive donated blood, Ive signed up to the bone marrow donation register as well as the organ donation register. But I will NOT donate my hair and that is how it is and truth to be told, I dont think Im selfish at all for saying that.

I honestly have no idea how I´d react if I ever got that question, but knowing myself it would probably be a short but simple "no, I like it this way" or something. If theyd continue pushing the subject any further, Id leave. Im not one for arguing and I dont feel like I have to explain myself to anybody when it comes to decisions Ive made regarding myself, my life and my looks.

[Avenie]

OK, wow I took it to mean that people call you selfish if you don't donate your hair when you've decided you're going to cut it off.

If someone said it about hair that is loved and desired by the owner, I'd tell them to donate a kidney!

[Theobroma]

Where I come from, nobody ever asks that question. I was actually unfamiliar with the problem until I came on here and started reading about people getting bashed for not donating their long hair. In my world that phenomenon is just bizarre.

Same here. In my part of the world (Europe) it would be absolutely, totally socially unacceptable to go around accosting strangers about their appearance and about what they should be doing with their hair (or any other body part). Besides which, I don't think anyone here has even heard of hair donating.

If anyone ever tried to tell me I should donate my hair, or even just how I "ought" to be wearing it in their opinion, I think I'd just give them a withering look and ask them whether their mother never taught them any manners. Really, if you behave like an ill-mannered child around me, you'd better be ready to be rebuked like a child!

[truepeacenik]

A fantastic response, theobroma,. If I were to do it someone would be carrying a gun, and I'd get shot.

But the withering look is now in the toolbox.

I often wonder about the ego in people who brag about growing and chopping for locks of Loathe.
They are so tied up in " some kid has this because of me/my hair graces a kid" and "I'm not selfish because I cut my hair and gave away the cuttings."
Grand. Most places just sweep them up and toss them. You gave away trash.

And they always have treated hair. That gets tossed. So does grey.

[woodswanderer]

:steamGrrr! I get asked about donating my hair about 5 or 6 times a year, or more depending on if I meet a lot of new people. People usually ask me when they meet me for the first time, but also strangers. I sometimes think when people meet me, it is more of a case where they feel a need to categorize me. Am I a person who donates for charity, am I religious, am I just weird? They want some explanation for why I am doing something out of the ordinary, ie...having long hair. No one has outright called me selfish, but I have had guilt trips about the poor little kids with cancer, etc. This always referring to Locks of Love, and the people are always misinformed about the controversy surrounding Locks of Love. I had a cashier who was a wig wearer who was very insistent to me about why I needed to donate to the point where I was trying to make a graceful exit, but she wouldn't quit talking my ear off about it. I avoid checking out with her now.

[Cheyne]

My hair is grey (colored over at this point) and always worn up so no random stranger has asked me if I was donating. However, 2 young ladies at work have seen my hair down and did ask. I explained the two facts above (grey and dyed) and nothing more was said.

There are people in the US that believe they have the right to intrude on a (female) stranger's life. Cases in point; pregnant women, nursing or non-nursing mothers and those with long hair. You cannot believe the number of people who will accost a pregnant woman's to touch her belly, opine on breast feeding (either for or against) or tell a woman she "must" donate her hair. You see this more in heavily populated than rural areas, but these entitled people are everywhere.

I would never donate to http://newsfeed.time.com/2013/05/17/report-locks-of-love-lost-6-6-million-worth-of-donated-hair/ Locks of Love, as they are obviously a for profit hair seller hiding behind a few charitable donations of wigs. A company does not just lose almost 7 million dollars worth of hair. If they wish to sell human hair-they need to pay the hair grower for it, the same as in any other market.

[RancheroTheBee]

Cheyne, You are absolutely right about people intruding on people's spaces. I'm not sure why some people think it's appropriate, but I feel for anyone who's pregnant and has to deal with the barrage of "oh, let me tell you everything I know!" every day.

I am still baffled by this trend of being asked about hair donations. I've been on these boards for years, and almost everyone has been asked this question by strangers, and I often hear people IRL respond to comments like, "I like your hair," with "Oh, thanks, I'm going to donate it".

[Kaelee]

I wear my hair up 99% of the time, so I've never been asked. If I were, though, I would give them an earful about the various truths behind hair donation. ;)

[sunrider_bby]

There are people in the US that believe they have the right to intrude on a (female) stranger's life. Cases in point; pregnant women, nursing or non-nursing mothers and those with long hair. You cannot believe the number of people who will accost a pregnant woman's to touch her belly, opine on breast feeding (either for or against) or tell a woman she "must" donate her hair. You see this more in heavily populated than rural areas, but these entitled people are everywhere

Wow really? I am from Europe too, so if you do that to a perfect strager, the obvious answer you are going to get is mind your own bussiness
Something I liked from the USA when I went was how easily people talked with each other without knowing each other. So sad this happens.

Does it happens to women or men too? O_O

[RancheroTheBee]

Wow really? I am from Europe too, so if you do that to a perfect strager, the obvious answer you are going to get is mind your own bussiness
Something I liked from the USA when I went was how easily people talked with each other without knowing each other. So sad this happens.

Does it happens to women or men too? O_O

I'm not from the states, but I'm very nearby and our culture isn't super different in terms of "talking to strangers". Yes, strangers love talking about, to and around pregnant people. Most of them won't hesitate to put in their two cents. Once, I told a friend I went off birth control for health reasons and she told me she'd help me take care of my baby! What?! I'm not sure what it is, but I have a bunch of pet theories about North Americans and their fascination with the circle of life and their inability to keep their noses out of it.

As for men and comments about appearance, I don't think they usually see the same scrutiny. I think it has something to do with the fact that culturally speaking, Americans and Canadians have cultivated a media that implies people are owed access to women's bodies (see: objectification in media, obsession with women's bodies in the media, etc). Open any tabloid and the amount of faux-concern about women's weight and fertility and presentation is absolutely out of control. My husband is accosted with comments about how his hair is nice, or that his beard is nice. I am stopped and asked what I do to it, or when it's longer, helpful suggestions on irons I might want to try. The depth of involvement is telling.

[sumidha]

I've never had anyone, friend or stranger, suggest that I should donate my hair. I'm not sure if it's a regional thing or an approachability thing.

My response would probably vary depending on the person and situation, anywhere from 'No.' to a lecture about hair donation, and keeping your opinions to yourself.

[molljo]

Since I'm familiar with hair donation controversy (and I honestly believe it's all just a big scam), I think the only reason I would ask a longhair I'd just met if he/she was donating it would be to find out if this person is a) the type who doesn't research the organization they're supporting and b) more importantly, if they are the type that feels very smug and self righteous about caring more about the children than I do. It's a pretty good litmus test to find out if I want to pursue a friendship with them. I think the answer most people here would give (that they put a lot of care and effort in to their hair because they like it, damnit) is honestly what I'm hoping for if I ask that question.

[SkyChild]

This sounds pretty shocking!
In the UK I think everyone would be too polite and British to ask, unless they meant it in a genuinely curious and friendly way.
You almost certainly wouldn't get a lecture about it from a random stranger.

I did get a lot of strangers commenting when I was pregnant and also about breastfeeding (for some reason that means you can say anything you want)
I have considered donating my hair once it's long enough but I guess that I'll wait until it's that length before deciding I'll cut it off!

[Yozhik]

I've been asked by two people if I would donate my hair - DBF's mother and a good friend of mine.
DBF's mother asked me when I told her I had cut off 6 inches, and she said "oh, what a pity, if you had cut off 2 more inches, you could have donated." Ugh.
My friend asked me and I told her that LoL is a sham, but that if I were to donate, it would be to Pantene Beautiful Lengths.

[lazuliblue]

I don't think many people in the UK know about donating hair...or at least it is rarely talked about. I would never dream of asking someone if they were going to donate their hair, it is just plain rude.

[Kaelee]

I don't think many people in the UK know about donating hair...or at least it is rarely talked about. I would never dream of asking someone if they were going to donate their hair, it is just plain rude.

I wonder if it's due to all the publicity and advertisement LoL did (at least in the past) in the US. LoL is a really big, well known thing in the US- it's probably not so in other countries. Until recently I didn't even know that there were other hair donation type charities. I only knew about LoL.

[Theobroma]

A fantastic response, theobroma,. If I were to do it someone would be carrying a gun, and I'd get shot.

But the withering look is now in the toolbox.

I often wonder about the ego in people who brag about growing and chopping for locks of Loathe.
They are so tied up in " some kid has this because of me/my hair graces a kid" and "I'm not selfish because I cut my hair and gave away the cuttings."
Grand. Most places just sweep them up and toss them. You gave away trash.

And they always have treated hair. That gets tossed. So does grey.

Hmm, I had no idea that flaunting my silvers would automatically disqualify me from the scheme in any case.

I'll still make that remark about manners rather than pointing out the issue of grey hair, though. Some people just have it coming! :D


Cheyne, You are absolutely right about people intruding on people's spaces. I'm not sure why some people think it's appropriate, but I feel for anyone who's pregnant and has to deal with the barrage of "oh, let me tell you everything I know!" every day.

I am still baffled by this trend of being asked about hair donations. I've been on these boards for years, and almost everyone has been asked this question by strangers, and I often hear people IRL respond to comments like, "I like your hair," with "Oh, thanks, I'm going to donate it".

What in the world?! Because, clearly, NOBODY would want to have long hair for its own sake?

I hadn't realised how truly weird we all are on this site! :D

[SkyChild]

Weird in a good way though.
So most hair donation-y thingies are for-profit companies anyway? Hmph.
I wonder what would happen if I went and presented some freshly cut-off hair to a cancer patient/kiddie what they'd do with it? Would they be able to get a wig made cheaper than buying one? Maybe I should go on a wig-making course

[Wildcat Diva]

There's also the issue of real hair wigs being harder to care for than synthetics. Also, it can be hot and itchy to wear a wig.

I'd probably enjoy getting up the gumption to say, "What have you got against the poor little cancer afflicted kids flaunting their new look? There is nothing wrong with how they look after treatment. What kind of message would I be giving to them about their self image by donating with the implication that they NEED a wig? I don't judge their appearance. They are just fine as they are, and they are not here to decorate my world."

[Kaelee]

Weird in a good way though.
So most hair donation-y thingies are for-profit companies anyway? Hmph.
I wonder what would happen if I went and presented some freshly cut-off hair to a cancer patient/kiddie what they'd do with it? Would they be able to get a wig made cheaper than buying one? Maybe I should go on a wig-making course

If I were to do this, I would see about taking the hair to a wig maker, getting a wig made and giving it to someone myself, or something along those lines. Or sell the hair and donate the money! :p

[Kaelee]

There's also the issue of real hair wigs being harder to care for than synthetics. Also, it can be hot and itchy to wear a wig.

I'd probably enjoy getting up the gumption to say, "What have you got against the poor little cancer afflicted kids flaunting their new look? There is nothing wrong with how they look after treatment. What kind of message would I be giving to them about their self image by donating with the implication that they NEED a wig? I don't judge their appearance. They are just fine as they are, and they are not here to decorate my world."

Faith in humanity restored for the day. Yay WD!!! :D

[Avis]

Wildcat Diva, you are so right!

I admit, I used to be a "hair farmer" before I knew what these organizations ACTUALLY did with the hair. I spent 2 years growing out my hair, cut it to a pixie and did the same thing again. That's 4 years of growth for someone else. I realized last year a few months after I had my hair cut that although I like my hair short, it's MY hair and I can do what I want with it. I did get non-hostile comments from family and friends when it was BSL that "you should donate it" but now I'm done letting decisions about my hair be out of my control. It's my hair and I'm finally going to let it grow like I've always wanted to and I'm not going to let anyone try to make me feel guilty about that. I can always counter-argue with WD's point. :)

[molljo]

I'd probably enjoy getting up the gumption to say, "What have you got against the poor little cancer afflicted kids flaunting their new look? There is nothing wrong with how they look after treatment. What kind of message would I be giving to them about their self image by donating with the implication that they NEED a wig? I don't judge their appearance. They are just fine as they are, and they are not here to decorate my world."
This response is giving me life! Amazing.


If I were to do this, I would see about taking the hair to a wig maker, getting a wig made and giving it to someone myself, or something along those lines. Or sell the hair and donate the money! :p
Selling your hair is pretty lucrative, provided it's virgin with no greys. I think selling the hair and donating the money to an ethical charity of your choice is way better than giving the hair away for free to a sketchy organization.

[JessicaAnn]

I got some guff the other way around when I donated my hair. Lots of people felt the need to tell me how stupid it was of me to donate, that I shouldn't be upset over the bad haircut I received after the donation because it was my fault for cutting off over a foot of hair, and basically tossed all the "those orgs are all crocks, no one wants real hair wigs, you aren't helping anyone" lines at me. I researched the org I sent my hair to and was so impressed and moved by their work that I actually sent them money on top of it. I didn't need people belittling my choice anymore than someone who didn't donate their hair needs someone belittling theirs.

This was the third time in my life I've grown my hair down to my waist, but the first time I've donated. It is really thick/wavy and I'm pretty short, so when it gets to a certain length (around BSL) it tends to get attention. I've had people compliment me on my hair and sometimes ask if I was growing it out to donate. But the times I wasn't I just answered honestly and never got a hateful response. I find that most people are just wanting to compliment my hair and that's just part of the conversation that comes up sometimes. I wouldn't think to be offended anymore that I would be when people asked where I get my hair colored (I don't, but people seem to like my natural color) or where I get my nails done (I do them myself, but people tend to think my natural nails are acrylic). But I am also sometimes an unusually friendly and open person and that tends to encourage others to be friendly and open as well. As my Mom tells me, I never met a stranger.

[lapushka]

Same here. In my part of the world (Europe) it would be absolutely, totally socially unacceptable to go around accosting strangers about their appearance and about what they should be doing with their hair (or any other body part). Besides which, I don't think anyone here has even heard of hair donating.

I'm from the EU as well, and it would indeed be very rare. People aren't that intrusive and kind of weary of others where I live, unless you know them from afar already.

I always wear my hair up, 6 days out of 7 (wash day), and so I never ever got asked. Not yet, anyway.