Still not sure whether I like my hair colour or not :(

[BowTie]

So, I've been growing my real colour out since August. I've been dying my blonette hair for over 10 years and been bleached blonde about a year.

My problem is I still don't know whether I dislike or like my real colour. People said it will change while it grows. I haven't noticed much change. Actually it seems that it gets darker and ashier. In some updos, you can really see my growing hair colour well. Maybe it will look better when all the bleach is gone but on the other I doubt it will look good without any highlights. I guess the sun will get me some.

I've looked lots of blonette pictures. Most of the time I like them and think they look beautiful. But my real hair colour (from old pictures) just doesn't seem like that.

I honestly don't know what to do. I want to grow my dye out properly but I'm afraid I will still dislike it. Maybe I should just learn my hair will never be strawberry blonde, caramel or golden blonde and that my hair is very very ashy.

I don't know what to do if I don't like it. Bleaching is bad, dark hair dyes might give you a bad allergic reaction, I've read so many times henna doesn't suit blonettes and I don't really like cassia either.

Sometimes I feel like shaving my hair and wearing a wig.

[Lilli]

You have to wait until the virgin hair is 1-2 years old to see a color change IME. My hair is dark blonde at roots and light blonde at ends, and I do not color it - it just gets lighter as it gets older (I suppose just sun and being washed.) It really doesn't look lighter until about jaw length on me.

Perhaps you ought to dye the bottom to match the regrowth (or a bit lighter) so the contrast doesn't make the top look dull.

[Anje]

For what it's worth, I've never seen anyone whose natural hair color wasn't extremely flattering to their coloring, though I've seen a lot of dye jobs that aren't. It might not be your favorite color, but there's little worry that you natural color looks good on you.

[Lostsoule77]

I agree with Anje. I also think this comes down to being happy with who you are and what you really want. How long do you want your hair to grow? You can continue to bleach or dye to long lengths, but it takes a lot more care. Virgin hair is going to be easier to maintain. How much work are you willing to put into having the length you want? There are many factors here and only you can determine the answers for yourself. I know that doesn't help much, but it's the truth.

I think you need to look at what you say though. When you look at pictures of blonettes you usually like them. Remember that it's often hard to capture the true color of hair in pictures, especially with blonette hair. So when you're looking at your old pictures that could be part of the problem. Why not keep growing and just see what happens. You'll either like it or not. Then you can always bleach or dye. If you damage your hair now by doing it you can't go back and change it.

Regardless of all of that, ultimately you have to be happy. I think that no matter what we do in our journey to long, or really long, hair it doesn't matter if you aren't happy with it. IMHO ;)

[nicecupoftea]

Maybe you could try cassia to tone your hair more golden and less ashy?
Do you think the reason you like other peoples blondette hair more is because it has more golden tones?

Failing that maybe you could try a more gentle way of getting lighter hair like this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SosjYnLLYZI

There are definitely a few options that don't involve bleach. You may grow to like your natural colour, but if you never do then there's no sense in having long hair that you hate :)

[browneyedsusan]

Have you tried cassia? Can't hurt to try!
Have you hennaed a hairball? Can't hurt to try that either!
Maybe a weak henna gloss on a hairball will give you exactly what you're after? Try that too!

FWIW: I don't care for my natural color either. I don't mind the gray, but the ashy brown drives me berserk!

[BowTie]

I made a thread about henna on blonette hair once but I got lots of negative comments and now I'm too scared of trying it. It seems to be only for people with darker hair. I really love how most hennaed hair looks like and red is my another favourite colour. I especially adore those red raj henna thread here.

[Flor]

Cassia =/= Henna.

[Crumpet]

I know what you mean. My hair darkened a lot when I lived in the UK. I got highlights to blend it better with my USA hair and felt better. Now I'm letting my hair go back to natural and its still darker (but may lighten in the sun soon). I love the color on other people but find it hard to accept on myself. I do agree though that natural colors look better on people though (I usually check out the growing out dye/bleach thread for inspiration!). Also, I usually find that fake blonde and other colours just don't seem as appealing to me when I see them in the real world. These thoughts keep me natural.

Give it some time and you'll land on something that works for you!

[spidermom]

Even my hair would look ashy when growing in next to bleached blonde, and my hair was not at all ashy. It was more a copper/golden blonde when I was a younger adult, lots of silver now. Try to be patient, maybe try a temporary color to brighten things up while you grow.

[Lilybeany]

I feel were your coming from. Im a natural blonette.Im nearly 48. I like my waist bleached hair but as I am showing grays and am finding it hard to baby the ends, I too this month for first time ever ditched the bleach.The new roots seem very dark.Im not uses to seeing it.Im loathed to have it short.I seem to be getting sensitive to dyes.I dont want to dye over blonde as Ive been there and regreted it. I think from advice its a case of wait and see. I call my new look Grombre..gray/ bleach/bkonette grow out..Good luck.I do feel for you.Its like losing a friend I find..

[allycat]

grombre, that's hilarious! I love it.

[Nebulae]

I'd say give it more time. As previous posters mentioned you won't really notice a color change until your roots get longer. Also, it will probably look brighter in summer. Hang in there! :)

I must have missed your henna thread, but I just wanted to mention that I'm naturally blonette (or as far as I can remember and see from my roots.. they look quite ashy now but I remember it was more golden toned as a kid) and henna/red hair looks awesome on me, I've never been happier with my hair. I've seen lots of people who have dyed their blonette hair red and it didn't look wrong at all. I think it has something to do with your complexion as well. Why not try a henna/cassia gloss on some shed hair to see if you could achieve that strawberry blonde or even try pure henna? You might need to collect quite a bit of hair but test it and hold it up to your face and see what you think of the color against your skin!

[biogirl87]

I think it has something to do with your complexion as well. Why not try a henna/cassia gloss on some shed hair to see if you could achieve that strawberry blonde or even try pure henna? You might need to collect quite a bit of hair but test it and hold it up to your face and see what you think of the color against your skin!Seconding this. Bowtie, if your skin tone is quite warm and you look good in autumny (warm, slightly muted) colors, you would look really good with hennaed hair. Season-wise, autumns (especially warm autumn and dark autumns) are the perfect wearers of hennaed hair I think. So, if you think (or you have been told) you look good in golds, browns, mosses, warm burgundy red, deeper purple colors, you would look really good with hennaed hair, even if your eyes are light in color. I have read how a skin undertone (warm or cool or neutral) is the main thing that determines how hair color looks on a person.

[maskedrose]

Just repeating what others have said - give it more time, and try cassia if you feel like you need to warm things up a bit in the meantime. Henna DOES depend entirely on complexion. I am a natural honey blonde with very cool/pink/fair skin. I did a henna gloss a couple of years ago, and it really clashed with my skin tone. I've still got some copper tones on the length, but thankfully its now far enough away from my face to not be too obvious. If I really get the itch to lighten things up a bit, I will use a very small about of sun-in only on my face framing fringe. I find that it give my face brightness, but I also trim those pieces regularly so there is no damage to the length.

[ErinLeigh]

You could always let natural color grow out and just put some highlights on your bang area. Just a few blended streaks goes a long way in adding color. This way you could grow the length but also get some brightening around the face. Just make sure when you touch it up they do not pull the bleach all the way each time. They should be able to do root highlights to keep the look fresh.

[sarahthegemini]

You need to give it more time. It's only been 4 months, of course you're not going to be able to judge the true colour of your hair when it's lined up with the bleached length you have. Wait til you have atleast jaw/chin length virgin hair, you'll be able to judge your natural colour better. Ultimately though, if you're not prepared to wait, then dye it.

[browneyedsusan]

I made a thread about henna on blonette hair once but I got lots of negative comments and now I'm too scared of trying it. It seems to be only for people with darker hair. I really love how most hennaed hair looks like and red is my another favourite colour. I especially adore those red raj henna thread here.


*snip*
Why not try a henna/cassia gloss on some shed hair to see if you could achieve that strawberry blonde or even try pure henna? You might need to collect quite a bit of hair but test it and hold it up to your face and see what you think of the color against your skin!

Test on a hairball from your brush or shed hair first. You may really like it! Mehandi.com sells samples at $1.50 each for testing. (When I started using henna, I had a pixie and collected 1 1/2" long hairs from the vanity top for 3 days before I had enough to test on. I put my carefully collected sheds in a coffee cup for safe-keeping!) You could find out what it will look like for just a few bucks?

[stachelbeere]

I've looked lots of blonette pictures. Most of the time I like them and think they look beautiful. But my real hair colour (from old pictures) just doesn't seem like that.

when looking at pictures keep in mind that things look different in pictures than in reality depending on many factors such as:

- lighting (favourable/ unfavourable)
- flash/ lack of flash
- camera quality
- the hair is coiffed for the picture
- sometimes (often?) undetectable photoshop (even subtle colour tweaking will make a difference)
- other factors that I can't think of atm

depending on these the same head of hair is going to look great/ awful.

[abauer789]

I also think you need to give it more time. It took until recently, and I have been growing mine out since last December, before I could tell my real color. The roots looked very dark, dull and ashy. But now that it is mid ear length, the color is more light golden brown. The contrast between hair dye and natural hair is so drastic!
I think that is what scares a lot of women from growing it out. Now I just LOVE the natural color! It has been a long hard road the last year, but LHC has helped me out tremendously! ;)