Working a full time job has RUINED MY HAIR. Need suggestions. What should I do?

[JCM]

http://s14.postimg.org/fn65ptrlt/hair.jpg

My hair is much longer than the picture in my avatar.
My hair length is now approaching the middle of my back.
At first, my boss would not allow for me to grow my hair below my shoulders.
But as my hair grew longer, I was then told by another boss above him I could continue to grow it but I would have to tie it up into a pony tail.
So rather than cut my hair I settled for the pony tail option.
At first when my hair was much shorter when I would part it in the middle and wear it down on my days off everything looked normal.
But now that my hair is much much much longer when I part it in the middle and wear it down on my days off it looks like this.
Not only is it impossible to comb through, but when I finally manage to comb through all of it and try to wear it down, I have hairs that stick out as pictured above.
Most of the hairs that stick out appear to be the same length as the hairs that do not stick out. Most but not all.
It also gets really puffy when I shampoo it which adds to the difficulty of combing through it.
My hair is not gray/grey it just looks that way in the picture because of the lighting.
What do you recommend I do to avoid my hair looking like this when I want to wear it down?


Bargaining with my bosses is not an option.
I think I may have to quit my job and find me something else.
Unfortunately in my profession there are not many places which allow for males with long hair to wear their hair down.

http://www.freeimagehosting.net/newuploads/lk5ho.jpg

ETA: I apologize for the large pictures. I will only post 2 pictures in this thread.

[ejking2]

Why not wear it in a bun for work? It seems like your bosses just want it to be kept neat and contained, and a bun with spin pins, Amish pins, or a simple stick or fork should both fulfill their wishes and protect it from damage.
Do you use oils and/or conditioner? Also, be sure to avoid ripping through tangles when you comb. Be gentle and patient. If your comb has fine teeth, I recommend a wide-toothed comb instead.

[Soltimus]

Aw man :( Do you think you'd be allowed to bun it? I've seen a few guys in here upload pictures of their hair in buns and it looks awesome.

Have you tried oiling your hair to give it some moisture?

[Tail Feathers]

i would suggest you braid or bun it, no ?

i don't think they could prohibit a braid or a bun . . .
if you wear a jacket or vest,
you could even keep the braid underneath it . . .

[JCM]

Why not wear it in a bun for work? It seems like your bosses just want it to be kept neat and contained, and a bun with spin pins, Amish pins, or a simple stick or fork should both fulfill their wishes and protect it from damage.
Do you use oils and/or conditioner? Also, be sure to avoid ripping through tangles when you comb. Be gentle and patient. If your comb has fine teeth, I recommend a wide-toothed comb instead.

I have never considered wearing a bun before.
I may have to look into that.

I go to a salon where they shampoo/condition it.
That's it. Nothing else.

[KittyBird]

How about a french braid? That looks awesome on men, and it would keep your hair protected and out of the way.

[JCM]

Aw man :( Do you think you'd be allowed to bun it? I've seen a few guys in here upload pictures of their hair in buns and it looks awesome.

Have you tried oiling your hair to give it some moisture?

I do not know if they would allow it.

I have never tried oiling it.


i would suggest you braid or bun it, no ?

i don't think they could prohibit a braid or a bun . . .
if you wear a jacket or vest,
you could even keep the braid underneath it . . .

I do not know if they would allow it.

[Tail Feathers]

geez

i sure hope you can find a solution . . .

[JCM]

How about a french braid? That looks awesome on men, and it would keep your hair protected and out of the way.

I will have to ask.
I am sure I will have to find pictures to show them because I doubt they will know what any of these terms (bun, braid, pins) mean.

[Bagginslover]

I wouldn't ask, if you do, they'll find a reason to say no. Just pick one, and go in wearing it one day. I bet they don't even notice.

[FuzzyBlackWaves]

Have you tried a side braid? I have to wear one for work and it doesn't causes that halo effect of broken hairs.

[Kelikea]

Is it written anywhere in the dresscode what your hair style has to be? You might want to look into that, rather than just asking the boss. It sounds like the boss just doesn't like long hair. As long as it is contained and out of the way, I don't see a reason they can forbid it, unless it looks extreme, somehow.

[Zebra Fish]

I second trying a braid. If they let you having a ponytail - a braid is more contained and shorter, not to mention a low bun. Maybe if you just come one day in a braid or bun (try what suits you better) and ask them right there if it is ok to wear your hair that way? Maybe they can better realize what you are asking if they see it in first place then seeing pictures (that may sound complicated or get misunderstood), and you can always undo it and put in a pony if they have something to object.

[Kaelee]

Braid, bun, ponytail with a flexi8 instead of an elastic.

Is it "no long hair because you're a man and it's unprofessional" or "no long hair because it can get caught in machinery"? If it's the latter, I lived with it twisted up in an octopus clip until I could bun it with sticks.

[VixenWolfMare]

What at work is casueing your hair to be damaged? Is it the pony tail? the environment?

ETA: also when you wash your hair what do you do/ use?

ETA2: Also what do you comb your hair out with?

[truepeacenik]

I have never considered wearing a bun before.
I may have to look into that.

I go to a salon where they shampoo/condition it.
That's it. Nothing else.

Well, that's the root cause of damage, along with constantly wearing it down.

Learn a couple compact bun styles. Position it at the back of your head, rather than the top. No Navajo or samurai looks.

Then get reading on care routines.


And when it comes to appearance on the job, it's better to ask forgiveness than permission.

[turquoisedays]

Yes, it could be the profession you're working in where there's something dangerous about wearing your hair down or there's fear you may get it in something. When I worked in restaurants it was required that I had it in a bun (or my boss would worry it would get in customers food), and when I worked on the machine line at work it was mandatory to keep it up or it could get caught in a lathe.

I second recommendations about keeping it up in a bun in any case.


Braid, bun, ponytail with a flexi8 instead of an elastic.

Is it "no long hair because you're a man and it's unprofessional" or "no long hair because it can get caught in machinery"? If it's the latter, I lived with it twisted up in an octopus clip until I could bun it with sticks.

[furnival]

Unless your job involves something that's touching and damaging your hair, in which case you ought to put it up and out of the way, it isn't your job that has ruined your hair. Once hair gets to around mid back length it tends to get damaged easily if it isn't kept in a protective style. A ponytail isn't a protective style. If your employers had allowed you to wear it down it's likely that it would still be getting damaged.

This site is a fantastic resource for info on looking after long hair- read up on protective styles, treatments, oiling etc as people have suggested. Taking care of long hair isn't always as straightforward as washing it and conditioning it.

[windyballoons]

I wouldn't ask, if you do, they'll find a reason to say no. Just pick one, and go in wearing it one day. I bet they don't even notice.

Agreed. Don't ask about it unless they speak to you first. Don't draw their attention to it. Braid it neatly and tuck the braid under your shirt. They won't have to look at your long hair and you won't damage it as much.

[Anje]

A bun is a fantastic idea, but I'm not entirely convinced that what you're seeing is damage.

Can you tell, looking at the ends, if they're broken off, or do they have a gradual taper and pointed tip? If it's the second, what you're seeing is newer growing hairs that haven't reached your ends yet. The number of these shorter-than-full-length hairs increases the longer hair grows, but you'll have more of them when actively growing your hair than if you're maintaining a length (that's shorter than terminal, at least) that allows more of them to 'catch up'.

How much they stick out is partly a function of texture, particularly the texture of the new ends. My hair is amazing at making new growth stick out every whichway, because my follicles seem to make hair that has some curl to it for a few inches before getting down to business producing hair with only a slight wave. Annoying, but there's not much I can do about it; I've learned to love my hair with all its quirks.

[spidermom]

I agree with Anje that the majority of what you're seeing is probably newer and therefore shorter hairs. Some may be breakage, of course, because a ponytail isn't a protective style.

Also, hair at mid back gets pretty tangly for most of us, particularly if there's any wave to it.

[Kaelee]

A bun is a fantastic idea, but I'm not entirely convinced that what you're seeing is damage.

Can you tell, looking at the ends, if they're broken off, or do they have a gradual taper and pointed tip? If it's the second, what you're seeing is newer growing hairs that haven't reached your ends yet. The number of these shorter-than-full-length hairs increases the longer hair grows, but you'll have more of them when actively growing your hair than if you're maintaining a length (that's shorter than terminal, at least) that allows more of them to 'catch up'.

How much they stick out is partly a function of texture, particularly the texture of the new ends. My hair is amazing at making new growth stick out every whichway, because my follicles seem to make hair that has some curl to it for a few inches before getting down to business producing hair with only a slight wave. Annoying, but there's not much I can do about it; I've learned to love my hair with all its quirks.

This too. And it sticks out more on one side than the other. :lol: For the longest time I was wondering where all the breakage was coming from. But it's just ill behaved new hairs that stick out at about the same length because of how my hair waves slightly.

[AmyBeth]

I must be blind, because I'm not seeing damaged broken hair. it looks good to me. Protecting long hair makes sense because it will help keep it healthy and will also keep your hair out of the way of your work and out of your boss's sight! I like the idea of keeping it in a braid under your shirt if it is long enough. In my town, there is an older lawyer who is always dressed in suits and ties, very professional looking. His hair is grey and he slicks it back and it looks like a normal man's haircut until he turns around and then you can see that his hair is braided down to his waist. When you keep your hair as unobtrusive as possible at work, it will be less likely to attract any negative attention- especially if you work hard and do a good job!:p

[JCM]

Thank you to everyone who responded.
I will look into the bun option.

In the meantime, is there anything I can do to avoid having my hair look the way it does in the picture I posted when I want to wear it down on my days off?

[ejking2]

A little coconut oil (just enough that you rub it between your palms and they have a sheen) could smooth down the flyaways a little bit and help get your hair into better condition. You can also apply coconut oil heavily the night before you wash your hair to make it look and feel a bit nicer. Additionally, you may want to consider sleeping on a satin pillowcase to prevent friction damage.

[Long_hair_bear]

What about a hair glove or wrap?

[spidermom]

It takes gel or styling wax or pomade or putty to make my fly-aways lay down. Most people have fly-aways sticking out all over the place. Next time you're watching TV or a movie, pay attention to back-lit long-haired people. Most of them have little fly-aways. If they don't, think "wig".

[blondecat]

I have seen one dude rocking a scull and bones 'hair snood'

Good Luck. i too cannot see 'damage' it looks to me like your hair is simply growning at different rates.

I slick mine down with a bit of Aloe