Need some advice please

[Prettychild]

I mostly lurk here but I thought I would run a question by all the people here and get some "expert" advice. I am growing my hair out after a major hair loss episode (really long story). My hair is making decent progress but it is growing at very different rates so the sides and the back is roughly 4-5 inches long while the fringe and crown areas are only about 1 inch (or less) with some sparse areas. It looks pretty strange. I wear a wig when I go out.

My question is: should I cut my longer hair short and try to keep all hair at more of less the same length to get a move "even" look all around or should I leave it as it is? It is pretty obvious my crown hair is not catching up with the rest any time soon, but I'm so confused right now I don't know what to do. Any ideas? shudder:

[Sillage]

I'm glad you are doing better Prettychild :)

If you got your hair cut, would you be able go out with out a wig?

[bythesea]

I think maybe let it grow for about a full year, and then trim off a few inches to even it out/get rid of split ends, and then repeat that process until your hair is all the same length or growing at the same rate. That way, you're evening out your hair while also growing it out longer.

I'm not a hair professional, but that's probably how I'd handle the situation.

[Prettychild]

See below. :o

[Prettychild]

I'm glad you are doing better Prettychild :)

If you got your hair cut, would you be able go out with out a wig? Thank you! Sad to say I cannot go out without the wig. My crown is too sparse at the moment.


I think maybe let it grow for about a full year, and then trim off a few inches to even it out/get rid of split ends, and then repeat that process until your hair is all the same length or growing at the same rate. That way, you're evening out your hair while also growing it out longer.

I'm not a hair professional, but that's probably how I'd handle the situation. Good common sense. I don't get split ends, not even when my hair was very long but yes, I can imagine your plan may well work. A year is a long time to wait and I guess I get a little impatient with my little baby hairs!

[durgidog]

I agree with bythesea, if you'll be wearing the wig anyhow I don't see any reason to cut unless your ends are damaged. My hair grows at different rates around my head too, I think that's normal and I imagine it will be less noticable as your crown grows longer. Good luck!

[Sillage]

I think I might keep my hair short until the crown filled in PrettyChild, but that's just me. Do whatever makes you feel good :) If keeping the long hair makes you happy-- keep it for sure.

[Prettychild]

I'm glad you are doing better Prettychild :)

If you got your hair cut, would you be able go out with out a wig?

Thank you all for the replies. Two different camps here. I'm going to sleep on it so I don't make any rash decisions! :p

[sarahthegemini]

I'm part of the 'if you're gunna be wearing a wig, leave the hair alone' camp :D

[lapushka]

I'm part of the 'if you're gunna be wearing a wig, leave the hair alone' camp :D

Yep! Count me in as well! :D If it's going to stay covered, it doesn't matter what it looks like (the unevenness I mean). If you are going to keep it covered, you can let it all just grow until the crown is nice and long and has caught up nicely. Hoping that happens for you soon! :blossom:

[Prettychild]

Yep! Count me in as well! :D If it's going to stay covered, it doesn't matter what it looks like (the unevenness I mean). If you are going to keep it covered, you can let it all just grow until the crown is nice and long and has caught up nicely. Hoping that happens for you soon! :blossom: Awww. Thanks. I think I'll leave the hair alone. I can always wear a turban around the house, right? ;-)

[Sillage]

Prettychild-- take inspiration from Sophia (http://www.sydnestyle.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/picture-5.png)!

[ErinLeigh]

I am in in the keep it short until it fills in camp. This way you can take the wig off sooner but still have hair look like it was intentionally that way.
I have grown out a bald head and I did the opposite of what I see mostly. I kept trimming the length to prevent the mullet. Different strokes. I just never liked to look like I am growing out a hair situation. I'd rather be stubborn and pretend its my choice cut. Made me feel more confident and more in control of what was happening to me.

[Prettychild]

HA! Sophia would look gorgeous no matter what. I was blessed with a mum who looks a lot like Sophia (I don't LOL).

[Prettychild]

I am in in the keep it short until it fills in camp. This way you can take the wig off sooner but still have hair look like it was intentionally that way.
I have grown out a bald head and I did the opposite of what I see mostly. I kept trimming the length to prevent the mullet. Different strokes. I just never liked to look like I am growing out a hair situation. I'd rather be stubborn and pretend its my choice cut. Made me feel more confident and more in control of what was happening to me. It is not a bad idea about taking the wig off sooner. Uhmmm. This discussion is actually making me think instead of just scratching my head wondering what to do. Cheers.

[Prettychild]

I've decided to go for a intermediate trim. This means I will make the long bits shorter but not as short as the hair on the crown. I think this will make it easier for the top hair to catch up with the rest without looking too uneven.

[Ashflower89]

Having grown out 3 short pixie cuts, this is a dilemma I've dealt with a lot. With the first two pixies, I was so desperate for length that I didn't get a single cut for an entire year. It looked ratty and it was impossible to style without covering completely, and it didn't finally begin to look normal until a year and a half later. There never seemed to be a good way to handle it, and every different layer made flippies all over my head from my natural curls, I couldn't stand it. I'm working on the third pixie now, and decided I don't want to spend a whole year or longer feeling like every day is a bad hair day. I've been getting the longest layer (the back) trimmed right up to the hairline until the sides catch up to it. There are still shorter layers in front, but once the sides are evened up with the back, those front layers just look like intentional bangs. My advice to you is, the longer you can ignore your layers, the more overall length you will have. But if you're at the point where it's driving you nuts and you can't ignore it, there's no harm in having your longest layers brought up bit by bit, maybe a monthly trim until things look even. You will feel better in the long run. Good luck!

[Prettychild]

Having grown out 3 short pixie cuts, this is a dilemma I've dealt with a lot. With the first two pixies, I was so desperate for length that I didn't get a single cut for an entire year. It looked ratty and it was impossible to style without covering completely, and it didn't finally begin to look normal until a year and a half later. There never seemed to be a good way to handle it, and every different layer made flippies all over my head from my natural curls, I couldn't stand it. I'm working on the third pixie now, and decided I don't want to spend a whole year or longer feeling like every day is a bad hair day. I've been getting the longest layer (the back) trimmed right up to the hairline until the sides catch up to it. There are still shorter layers in front, but once the sides are evened up with the back, those front layers just look like intentional bangs. My advice to you is, the longer you can ignore your layers, the more overall length you will have. But if you're at the point where it's driving you nuts and you can't ignore it, there's no harm in having your longest layers brought up bit by bit, maybe a monthly trim until things look even. You will feel better in the long run. Good luck! Good to hear from somebody who's "been there". Yes, the difference in length in the layers is not only driving me nuts but I look seriously strange. A bit like those men who are clearly balding but grow the side long so they can whip this hair over the top to cover up the bald spots.LOL I am going to bring the have a little trim of about 2 inches all around.

[ErinLeigh]

Prettychild, I am sorry about your hair loss. I know how hard it is. My bald head wasn't my choice but had to be done unfortunately. Anytime you need support we are here.
I think the trim is good idea. Something about shortening the length seems to make the short crown bit look/feel longer. You will feel feel better and better as it fills in and looks like a full pixie. At least then if you feel like having a wigless day you can rock the style and own it.

I was like ashflower on her last one. Sometimes it is easier to forgo the endless bad hair days and let it catch up.

I'm in a kind of weird situation now where my stylist made my layers really odd. Half my head has the layers longer than the other. I cant tell if this was intentional to match my side part or what but it is making me crazy. The longer half also has more layers and it really flippy. I cant decide to cut it all even or gain some length then cut. Knowing me I will probably cut this month to even out. It is hard for me to grow hair that I know I will remove. I'd rather get rid of it before becoming attached to it :) Something about my hair being uneven makes me filled with anxiety as there is too much to think about as far as options to grow it out. I can deal with any length as long as it looks and feels even and nice.

Whatever decisions you make as you grow out will be what is best. You know yourself better than anyone. I wish you lots of good hair days and peace during this transition time.
I have a feeling it is going to grow out beautifully and a lot faster than you think. The little spots that are just filling in will be full pixie length in a month and it will make all the difference in how you feel. I am sure you look beautiful now though.

[Prettychild]

Prettychild, I am sorry about your hair loss. I know how hard it is. My bald head wasn't my choice but had to be done unfortunately. Anytime you need support we are here.
I think the trim is good idea. Something about shortening the length seems to make the short crown bit look/feel longer. You will feel feel better and better as it fills in and looks like a full pixie. At least then if you feel like having a wigless day you can rock the style and own it.

I was like ashflower on her last one. Sometimes it is easier to forgo the endless bad hair days and let it catch up.

I'm in a kind of weird situation now where my stylist made my layers really odd. Half my head has the layers longer than the other. I cant tell if this was intentional to match my side part or what but it is making me crazy. The longer half also has more layers and it really flippy. I cant decide to cut it all even or gain some length then cut. Knowing me I will probably cut this month to even out. It is hard for me to grow hair that I know I will remove. I'd rather get rid of it before becoming attached to it :) Something about my hair being uneven makes me filled with anxiety as there is too much to think about as far as options to grow it out. I can deal with any length as long as it looks and feels even and nice.

Whatever decisions you make as you grow out will be what is best. You know yourself better than anyone. I wish you lots of good hair days and peace during this transition time.
I have a feeling it is going to grow out beautifully and a lot faster than you think. The little spots that are just filling in will be full pixie length in a month and it will make all the difference in how you feel. I am sure you look beautiful now though.
First of all thank you for sharing your story past and present. What was your stylist thinking of? You poor dear. But above all thank you for your words of encouragement. Much needed at the moment. If I could have a pixie by Spring it would be amazing. Last summer I suffocated under a full wig. I will have the longest layers brought up a bit. At this moment I will do anything to stop looking like this:

http://us.123rf.com/450wm/isselee/isselee1212/isselee121200092/16773980-hairless-dog-mix-between-french-bulldog-and-chinese-crested-dog-against-white-background.jpg OMG I wish I knew how to make pics smaller. Sorry about this.

[Sillage]

:grouphug: Prettychild :grouphug:

Hang in there! I'm hoping for the best for you :)

(your pic size is fine BTW on my screen)

[martyna_22]

I hope you're feeling better :blossom:
I'd say leave the hair alone as well. If you cut it now, you'll only make the growth journey longer.

[Prettychild]

Thank you for the kind words. You all rock. :toast:

[Lilybeany]

If it were me...and I too have shed in past..long story..I just never cut and let it be..less became more..hair toys became fun.Good luck

[Elanadi]

I don't know what kind of hairless dog that is, but I have a hairless chinese crested that wasn't blessed with hair of the show dog version. He only has hair on his head and tail, and scraggly hair on his feet. I think he is just precious with his wispy hair and thin patches and wirey grampa hairs, lol!!! But I get that we don't want out own hair to look like that. ;) I'm in the keep the hair trimmed until the shorter hair grows out camp, I agree with the poster that would rather have an intentional hair cut, and I just feel better when my hair is even and trimmed. I've grown out two very short hair cuts (not quite pixies) and both times I kept my hair at chin level until the layers caught up, then let it grow long. That way there wasn't any obvious awkward stages or the dreaded mullet. But I can see the argument for leaving it long. I think you have to decide what will make you feel most confident, and go with that. :)

[Prettychild]

I don't know what kind of hairless dog that is, but I have a hairless chinese crested that wasn't blessed with hair of the show dog version. He only has hair on his head and tail, and scraggly hair on his feet. I think he is just precious with his wispy hair and thin patches and wirey grampa hairs, lol!!! But I get that we don't want out own hair to look like that. ;) I'm in the keep the hair trimmed until the shorter hair grows out camp I didn't mean to offend your doggie. The picture of the dog is a mixed breed of some kind. My old dog was a rescue dog and although he had hair he was missing one paw and he wasn't pretty either. LOL I loved him though. But, no, I don't want to look like a hairless creature of any kind! I think I am having a "compromise" trim. That is I am bring the long layers up a bit to chin level so when (when and not if!) the short hair grows it doesn't look too weird. I have no idea how long it is going to take me grow my hair back to BSL but I'm working on it!

[Elanadi]

I didn't mean to offend your doggie. The picture of the dog is a mixed breed of some kind. My old dog was a rescue dog and although he had hair he was missing one paw and he wasn't pretty either. LOL I loved him though. But, no, I don't want to look like a hairless creature of any kind! I think I am having a "compromise" trim. That is I am bring the long layers up a bit to chin level so when (when and not if!) the short hair grows it doesn't look too weird. I have no idea how long it is going to take me grow my hair back to BSL but I'm working on it!

We're not offended, not at all! I love that you posted that pic, actually. :) And I can't wait to see pics of your hair, when you feel confident enough to post them. :)

[Prettychild]

In the end I went for a small trim. I couldn't bare to shave my hair off of make it truly short but I brought the long layers off up to chin level. I realised that even with normal hair growth my top is too sparse to catch up with the bottom hair so a 2 inch trim seemed a happy compromise. I went to a salon where they are used to seeing people with little hair (they sell wigs and all that). The hair dresser said she could see the peach fuzz on my crown so there is light at the end of the tunnel. :) Thank you all for the advice. All very useful and it helped me make a more cold-headed decision instead -and I will come back with some pics -as soon as I dare! LOL

[Sillage]

YAY! I am glad you are happy with your cut and it's wonderful to hear that you had a nice stylist. And hooray for peach fuzz! That's great news. Hope you keep this thread updated with your progress :)

[heidi w.]

Huh. Wear a wig. Good idea for me too.
heidi w.

[Prettychild]

"Hope you keep this thread updated with your progress "

Will do. :D