Last night I saw a hair nightmare...

[BowTie]

Okay, since joining LHC I've been spying strangers' hair. I especially notice people with beautiful and healthy-looking hair and they really inspire me. For example, I've seen this older lady a few times and she wears her white hair up. it looks so thick and she looks like chic!

However, I see some hair nightmares too..People with completely destroyed my hair. Okay, I used to do that. Mostly because hairdressers told me my hair will never grow longer than my shoulders and I believed it:rolleyes: Now, I've been babying my hair since August and can't believe how much better it looks. That's why everytime I saw a person with obviously destroyed hair I'd like to tell them my story and tell them that healthy hair will look much better than that teased mess..

Last night I saw a true nightmare on the bus. This woman had bleached, orangey hair around her APL. It was completely fried and honestly looked like candy floss.. it was also breaking a lot. I also noticed she had been curling and teasing it. Ugh, I'm glad I started taking care of my hair or I might have ended like that..

[Ashflower89]

I know what you mean! I joined LCH last month and it seems like now I pay way more attention to everyones hair, familiars and strangers alike. I've noticed some real ugly messes shopping at my local Walmart, and every once in a while a head of hair that makes me so jealous lol. Most of the bad ones I've seen are either terrible bleaching jobs like you described, or teens with a whole rainbow of box dyes on their head, with back-comb teasing, razored split layers, and porous sections that obviously didn't want to take the dye after the pre-bleaching. It makes me shudder.

[queenieheather]

Haha I have noticed this too! I check out everyone's hair now. I always thought this girl at work had such beautiful waist length red hair. She blow drys/straightens/etc. and upon closer inpection, her ends are fried! It makes me understand how healthy my hair really is. And thankful I found LHC and didn't just keep growing it without babying it :D

[Johannah]

A girl in class has also bleached her hair so hard. Her hair is naturally dark brown so you can imagine... She has dyed and bleached it so much that some parts are almost white, others are yellow and other parts are something like orange... And then she still straightens it... And I'm like:


I'LL TELL YOU ALL ABOUT COCONUT OIL AND CONDITIONER ONLY WASHING AND HAIR STICKS OH MY GOD. But then I realize I better shut up.

[Suze2012]

I'm a curly hair spotter...I see people who have hair just like mine used to be before I began co washing. Frizzy and dry looking but with masses of potential.

I would love to get my hands on them...but I feel it would be rude and intrusive to suggest anything.

The worst hair I ever saw belonged to my ex lodger. she was waist BSL but chunks kept falling off and falling out but she bleached it every three weeks religiously.
It got so bad with having missing chunks everywhere she had it all cut very very short with a plan to grow it again..Last time I saw her she was still bleaching every three weeks and she never did use any kind of protection or treatments on it, not even any conditioner.

[BowTie]

I'm a curly hair spotter...I see people who have hair just like mine used to be before I began co washing. Frizzy and dry looking but with masses of potential.

I would love to get my hands on them...but I feel it would be rude and intrusive to suggest anything.

The worst hair I ever saw belonged to my ex lodger. she was waist BSL but chunks kept falling off and falling out but she bleached it every three weeks religiously.
It got so bad with having missing chunks everywhere she had it all cut very very short with a plan to grow it again..Last time I saw her she was still bleaching every three weeks and she never did use any kind of protection or treatments on it, not even any conditioner.

Every 3 weeks? When I bleached I used to do it around 3 times a year because I'm lazy and poor. I think that saved my mlney and (hair).

[heatherlynnc]

Another vote for "OMG I do this too!"

Was in Ulta last night (to buy spin pins) and couldn't help critiquing every head of hair I walked by. The majority were over-processed and looking like they could use some LHC TLC!

[BowTie]

Another vote for "OMG I do this too!"

Was in Ulta last night (to buy spin pins) and couldn't help critiquing every head of hair I walked by. The majority were over-processed and looking like they could use some LHC TLC!

Good to know I'm not the only one

[ProverbsGirl]

I know what you mean. I was never one to dye or bleach too often. But I did wash/dry/curl daily.
I have a friend who's hair I used to admire...but since joining LHC and getting to know her and being around her more..I can see her hair slowly going down hill.
I'm also much more aware of other people hair and it's health. Lol

[AmyBeth]

A lot of the "destroyed" hair is just people having fun with different colors and styles. That's cool, knock yourself out. But on the older women, who you just know aren't going for the edgy, fun looks, I feel sorry for and would like to say, "Hey, check out LHC!" But that's an awkward conversation to start with a total stranger. Anyway, my hair is usually oiled and up in a school marm looking bun, so no one is going to take advice from me! I give myself credit for the fact that when I wash the oil out, let it air dry and wear it down, my hair looks pretty sweet, but that happens so rarely that hardly even my nearest and dearest know how nice my hair is.:shrug:

[LaurelSpring]

I have had friends that were destroying their hair. I tried to tell them things but they wouldn't listen. I learned my lesson. Now I will certainly give advice if asked but rarely volunteer it. It is difficult though when I know I could help them make it more healthy.

[niky45]

Lately I've been looking at other people's hair too....

It's really uncommon to see someone with long, beautiful, healthy hair IRL. You can tell almost everybody bleaches it and uses no conditioner (REALLY, I can tell that).

But when you see someone with long and healthy hair..... OOOOHHHHH.... It makes me feel so sad about my last cut.... (I actually like it, but since I'm trying to grow it out, it makes me sad to think I could have THAT hair NOW).

[patienceneeded]

Oh, sure. I see damaged hair all the time. However, I feel it's none of my business how they care for their hair. After all, I certainly don't want/need them telling me what I should be doing with MY hair.

[Stray_mind]

I too noticed that i pay more attention to other people's hair since i joined this community :) I see a lot of good and bad hair around me...

[YamaMaya]

In the UK bleached hair is almost ubiquitous, There are so many people with fake blonde hair that looks so dry and damaged I don't know how they can stand it. I bleached my hair for a short period and after what it did to my hair NEVER AGAIN!! I almost never see someone with hair I'd aspire to achieve someday.

[Majormiles]

Hate to say this but I have seen candyfloss hair on one of my friends...she has straightened it to death and she recently admitted it is falling out, I have said stop but she hasn't yet, such a shame

[summergreen]

I do notice other people's splits and damage more than I used to. But sadly I usually still prefer their hair to mine because I'm so hung up on lack of thickness and not being able to colour my greys!

[Leafy]

I think I saw a hair nightmare every day...on my own head. :'(
But it's getting better, so when my pixie has grown out, I'll start breathing again. XD

[dreamingstar]

I have begun to notice the condition of other peoples hair more. However, I wouldn't dare go up to them and say "Check out LHC if you want better locks!" If they comment on my hair or hairstyle I do mention that I'm growing it out, that I came across this really cool website (guess where?), and that it is at least worth peeking at. Other than that though, my lips are sealed.

[Tini'sNewHair]

My friend A has distroyed her hair, i believe that the only way to get her natural locks back is to shave it all off. Her hair has been bleached many time and shes done it herself which is worse i think. Shes got all sorts of white/blond/yellow shades of colours in her hair and her hair is the worst frizz i have ever seen in my life!!! She uses lots of heat and all sorts of creams to tame it and when she runs her hand through her hair, she gets balls of hair out. Im surprised shes not bald yet!!!! And the way she brushes her hair, ahhhhhhh it hurt watching!!!! I tried to tell her my ways but she dosnt take a momments notice so i let it go. Its her hair, so glad its not my hair!!!

Friend B has maybe waist hair, again hers is a massive frizz ball so to tame that she puts LOOOTS of hair spray, so much that her hair looks like glad wrap on her head. Half of her hair is split, badly. She uses lots of heat as well. Ive known her for over 3 years now and her hair has never gone passed that length. Its so sad to watch.

[Kaelee]

Oh gosh so many peoples' hair makes me cringe! And they usually think it looks GREAT, too. I think a lot of people don't know what healthy hair actually looks and feels like anymore.

[Leafy]

I bet I'm going to be like 'wow' when my hair grows out all natural. :agape: Because my hair hasn't been natural for ages, and I'm so used to it being dry.

[AmyBeth]

I do notice other people's splits and damage more than I used to. But sadly I usually still prefer their hair to mine because I'm so hung up on lack of thickness and not being able to colour my greys!

Look into henna and other plant dyes. They cover my greys and thickened my hair like nobody's business!

[Marron]

I regularly see hear nightmares.
People keep wearing their hair down regardless its condition or the weather. I would never ever wear my hair down when it's raining or freezing cold outside. I would never allow my hair to rub against my scarf and frizz. But most girls/ women I see don't seem to give a second thought about it. I also see a lot of girls/ women with long hair but I would never ever want to swap. It's like they're just going for long hair, no matter what, no matter what condition. So I see lots of breakage and frizz and I wouldn't dare showing hair like that. I don't even wear my own hair down because I'm super critical about it.
Sometimes I'd like to apply generous amounts of conditioner to the hair of strangers and to educate them about hair care ;D

My worst nightmare was when I saw a woman with long hair (probably TBL) which was seperated in half by its colour. She was growing her natural hair colour out and left the ends as they were. I understand when you start to go natural and don't want to do anything harmful to it again. But first of all her hair didn't look as if she were paying any attention on it's health anyways, and second, she wore a really artificial hair colour, some faded ruby red. Her natural hair colour was dark brown and she could have at least tried henna (I used henna/ indigo to switch from blue back to brown) to adapt the lower half of her hair to her roots.

But when I see hair like that I start to think that maybe most of the people aren't as critical as I am and that I could try and dare wearing my hair down. Still, I never do. ;) I'm too critical.

[Kaelee]

It's like they're just going for long hair, no matter what, no matter what condition.


That's my dad :(. Thin, splitty, false terminal somewhere between shoulder an APL. He pays no mind to the 5 or 10 strands wrapped around his ponytail holder when he rips it out down the length.

[evb]

Sadly the worst hair nightmare I didn't even realize was a nightmare until it was too late. I was a teen {over 30 yrs ago} and this lady in my apartment complex had beautiful long blonde curly hair. She was beautiful in that 80's [maybe still] cheerleader way and I used to envy her in my 15-16 yr old way. And then one day I saw her at the market… I hadn't seen her in months and her hair was strait and stringy and brown and short. The hairdresser refused to perm and color her hair anymore because it was too damaged. I was too stupid at the time to realize it was all faux and I never assume, to this day, that there are no real curly long haired blondes. To this day I still feel bad about her hair.

I of course, even then, used to olive oil my hair and not use heat on it. I have always been that way. My mom had books by Gayelord Hauser etc sitting around the house so I was sucking down castor oil and rubbing my body with olive oil to be pretty.

[Marron]

I don't really get it because I bet those women who wear "hair nightmares" are vain about their hair and probably store a lot of hair care products and combs, watch styling videos, style their hair, etc. They just have never come to the idea that they might not be taking care of it properly by using expensive but crappy products or heat (maybe because they're using a "heat protector").

[thirstylocks]

@marron, I think those women know their hair is damaged. My best friend has BSL length hair that she doesn't cut and that she's been flat ironing it on a daily basis for a decade. To make matters worse, she uses really heavy clip-in extensions every day to get hip length hair. Her hair is thinning and she's only 22. She knows how bad her situation is but she is so self-conscious about going out in public with her real hair that she can't stop. Her habits are like an addiction. She would never cut the damage and start over because she thinks short hair will make her look fat. (She's crazy - she is beautiful and really thin!) I'm assuming a lot of women have their own reason for keeping up with destructive habits.

[HintOfMint]

I was in DC on the metro the other week, and a woman in front of me with very highlighted hair had this one incredible split end sticking out practically horizontally. It was actually pretty cool looking and I caught myself staring at it a bunch of times.

I don't really cringe that much, I just know that it's a common consequence for many who heatstyle and color.

[HintOfMint]

@marron, I think those women know their hair is damaged. My best friend has BSL length hair that she doesn't cut and that she's been flat ironing it on a daily basis for a decade. To make matters worse, she uses really heavy clip-in extensions every day to get hip length hair. Her hair is thinning and she's only 22. She knows how bad her situation is but she is so self-conscious about going out in public with her real hair that she can't stop. Her habits are like an addiction. She would never cut the damage and start over because she thinks short hair will make her look fat. (She's crazy - she is beautiful and really thin!) I'm assuming a lot of women have their own reason for keeping up with destructive habits.

A close friend's little sister is like this. She's a great girl, very nice, but her look is Malibu Barbie. There's nothing wrong with her aesthetic, it's what she chose and she likes it. But her hair is naturally medium brown and she comes from pretty pale stock in terms of skin color. She puts a lot of work into her look, between the light golden blonde hair, tanning, and the makeup. When she had to have a chemical cut from all the dying she did, she went right for the extensions as she kept bleaching her hair as she grew it out again.

The "natural" look is just unthinkable to her, and I can see why. Her social life and the lifestyle and company she keeps really rewards the Malibu Barbie look. Without it, she would feel rather plain and not at all attractive. She's also had her pick of guys since she was in middle school, so I'm sure she's nervous to change any of the look that has worked so well for her in the past.

[0xalis]

Uhg... my friend's hair IS a hair nightmare. She bleached the life out of it and has dyed it more times that I can count... it's just a giant frizz ball.
I wish she'd just shave her head, it's that bad, but to each their own. She's not here to decorate my world.

[Sillage]

Some of you are absurdly judgmental.

[Leafy]

Some of you are absurdly judgmental.

Can I be judgmental against myself?
I've had to wash my hair twice to try and get my fibre hair putty out, and it's probably only done 95% of the job as I don't have a claryfying shampoo. Now my hair is really dry. I'm an idiot. :laugh:

[coconutinsight]

Some of you are absurdly judgmental.

Exactly what I was thinking

[Sillage]

Leafy, I think that's preferable to tsking about random strangers on a message board and acting like a bunch of scandalized heffalumps when people dare to exhibit their different hair priorities and aesthetics.

[nobeltonya]

It's been a while, but I saw this woman with like maybe APL or BSL length TOTALLY FRIED hair. *shivers* All of it looked a wreck... just fried to pieces. How in the world do people not realize what they're doing to their hair?! :disco:

[neko_kawaii]

Leafy, I think that's preferable to tsking about random strangers on a message board and acting like a bunch of scandalized heffalumps when people dare to exhibit their different hair priorities and aesthetics.

I must remember that!

Priorities and aesthetics indeed. That is part of the fun of people watching, seeing how much variation there is in the world!

[Sillage]

Neko, good to see you, friend :)

And I agree with you about variation but I'm sure this thread will be filled with more breathless reports about how somebody saw someone at the bus stop/7-11/their grandma's house with busted hair because people enjoy being smug and condescending.

[KittyBird]

Leafy, I think that's preferable to tsking about random strangers on a message board and acting like a bunch of scandalized heffalumps when people dare to exhibit their different hair priorities and aesthetics.
This.
Live and let live. Why get so upset over what other people do with their hair? It's their business, not ours. Isn't the famous LHC motto "I'm not here to decorate your world"? I think it applies to them as well :)

[lapushka]

As I did heat (think eighties, think "crimper"), bleach, dye, whathaveyou in the past... who am I to judge, really.

[bradlea]

Oh jeez, I'm glad I got to the last page and saw that I'm not the only one who was feeling really weird about this thread.
This is really only one step away from taking secret pictures of people just to post online and talk about how much you dislike the way they look... If people want to have damaged hair, that's great. They have different aesthetic preferences than you do. That's fine. Let's just leave them alone.

[Shibe]

Thank you Bradlea. A lot of our threads are turning into making fun of people, and I don't like that one bit.

None of us are hair experts, so get off the high horse and stop making fun of people on here, for petes sake!!

[chen bao jun]

I don't feel smug--I just feel sad that they don't know and I remember that in 2010 my hair was a nightmare and thank God my mother told me it was fried so that I started looking for a solution.
I sort of knew it but the fact that someone else noticed it put a fire under me and the rest is history.
I wonder how many are in the same position, especially with all the misinformation out there.

[Shibe]

If they want it, they will ask for it. Calling them out will just embarrass and make them defensive. We all thought we knew how to manage hair at one point.

[Tini'sNewHair]

I know i complained about my friends but they complain to me about the state of their hair and i just wanted to share. I dont sit around and point fingers at anyone, i didnt give names or their phone numbers and adresses for you guys to go call them at free will and abuse them. I'm actually very worried about my friends hair because its in a very bad condition and its falling out way to much to call that normal BUT like i said, theres nothing i can do about it (i wish i could and i tried once or twice) but i move on. I share my thoughts on here and then i move on with things. I dont want to be attacked by this but if you all do and call me "judgemental" then so be it. Some peoples bad habbits are BAD, and if i cant save them, talking about it helps to "move on" and let them deal with it. My friends knows these thoughts because they asked me what it thought of their hair so i dont feel like im talking behind their backs either. Ok, so moving right along. Cheers.

[Shibe]

No one is naming names or pointing fingers. If you feel it is a personal attack then you obviously feel guilty. They asked you your opinion, they probably don't expect for it to be mentioned on a thread called 'hair nightmares'. Don't think any friend of mine would be happy to see their trust be used as thread fodder.

[Tini'sNewHair]

Personally, i feel like i just needed to let out the sadness and worry and the upset i feel about my friends hair situations, its hard to listen to someone complain and see the distruction they make but then theres nothing i can do about it either because they dont hear the way out of it... And yes i shouldnt of written it like that and in a post titled this way, so i admit to doing some mistakes here but ah well, i learned something now and i need to move along.

[Sillage]

Chen, but maybe they like their hair that way? I agree with you tho that sometimes it can be helpful for a person to (compassionately) point out something you need to improve on, however I don't feel that that is the purpose of this thread.

I know it can be frustrating when the people we love and care about disappoint us, Tini but the tone of this thread is really gross. It's also important to remember that LHC is full of members in many different stages of hair health and a judge-y, catty thread like this is not inclusive. I thank you for owning up to your previous post and agree with moving along. Don't beat yourself up for not being 100% perfect all the time :)

[Tini'sNewHair]

My apology to those who I might of offended because of the way I talked about my friends hair care (by still using heat and dye, the brushing), I didnt mean to hurt anyone. I understand that we are all entitled to how we care for our bodies/hair and I respect everyone’s choice. So yeah, heres a very valuable lesson I have learned, not to judge, not to make a situation worse (like I feel I have done by talking the way I did of my friends) and accepting the way things are and only offering help when im asked for, and I really need to stop and think!!!. Pace to you all. And thank you Sillage. Cheers.

[chen bao jun]

Chen, but maybe they like their hair that way? I agree with you tho that sometimes it can be helpful for a person to (compassionately) point out something you need to improve on, however I don't feel that that is the purpose of this thread. )

I get where you are coming from, Sillage.
I guess I was jsut writing to say that although I haven't contributed to this thread, I do notice people's hair, because its not so long ago that mine was in bad condition and I didn't like it but didn't know what to do. I look at them and wonder if they would like advice, but then decide not to give it. But I am glad that someone pointed out my situation to me, that's all.
I think a lot of women are suffering with their hair, I often hear or overhear people desperately wondering why its falling out, or looks like hay, or has lost its curl and sometimes the answer is so simple, it jsut seems sad to me.
I did tell a young friend of mine the other day, who asked me how her hair looked, that I thought she might be using the curling iron too much as the bottom of her hair was dry and damaged. (I tried to say it gently). She thanked me. But instead of stopping using the flat iron, she cut the damaged part off and now is flat ironing the healthy part, so that I feel I shouldn't even have said anything.
It's hard to know what to do.

[kganihanova]

I get where you are coming from, Sillage.
I guess I was jsut writing to say that although I haven't contributed to this thread, I do notice people's hair, because its not so long ago that mine was in bad condition and I didn't like it but didn't know what to do. I look at them and wonder if they would like advice, but then decide not to give it. But I am glad that someone pointed out my situation to me, that's all.
I think a lot of women are suffering with their hair, I often hear or overhear people desperately wondering why its falling out, or looks like hay, or has lost its curl and sometimes the answer is so simple, it jsut seems sad to me.
I did tell a young friend of mine the other day, who asked me how her hair looked, that I thought she might be using the curling iron too much as the bottom of her hair was dry and damaged. (I tried to say it gently). She thanked me. But instead of stopping using the flat iron, she cut the damaged part off and now is flat ironing the healthy part, so that I feel I shouldn't even have said anything.
It's hard to know what to do.

Chen bao jun, I have a friend who is a wavy but doesn't treat it right. So to make her hair not "disgusting", she flat irons it.....after oiling it. I'm stuck in that same situation where I told her I oiled my hair to keep it nice and she took that to mean that oiling it pre-FI saved it from damage. It is a tough situation!

[Sillage]

I notice people's hair too, Chen... it's a human thing :)

I also agree that many suffer with their hair... it can be very difficult to know what to say or do. :/

[chen bao jun]

Well, Sillage, I'm grateful we found LHC.
And I do have a couple of friends who profited from this. One was losing her fine, blonde hair at the edges and was scared it was age related. I convinced her to try a natural bristle brush, oil a little and stop blow drying and now she is delighted with her hair. Another one who is a whurly stopped flat-ironing and is loving the compliments on her whurls. and my mom is my great success, she started Jamaican black castor oil and went to co-washing and fingercombing only and not only did her traction alopecia not continue, she grew hair back in all the bald spots and now its growing long, and she's 82.
I guess that's actually a lot of success. But people have to want the help--a lot of times people complain and they actually do not want help and I have to remember its not my job to fix them.
Many people would be satisfied with my former hair. It was thick, it was APL, it held styles well--many would not care that it felt like straw, that the breakage was constant and visible and it had never grown in about five years. People actually are shocked when I tell them that my hair was not only damaged but severely damaged. My mother (who knows my hair and knew it wasn't right) once told me that 'damaged' was the wrong word to use because I had so much hair, 'damaged' means that you are literally going bald.
that's where it is in the black community nowadays..and maybe not only there...
Nothing to be done.

[trolleypup]

Mod note: Any time you see things going poorly or unpleasantly in a thread, please use the Report Post button in the lower right (an exclamation point in a triangle) to alert the moderators and let them handle it. It is the moderators job to deal with such situations.

As others have pointed out, we can't be everywhere, and if noone brings a situation to our notice, none of us may happen to stop by until a time has gone by or things have gotten worse.

Again: you can report anything (good, bad, indifferent), all the moderators will see the report and we can discuss what needs to be done.

Thank you!

[Sillage]

I'm grateful too! It's so wonderful to have LHC as a resource, Chen.

[0xalis]

I don't think anyone really sets out to be offensive in threads like these. A lot of us just don't have a filter over our mouth [you get what I mean, lol.]
Because you're right, Sillage, we're being kindof mean and negative.

I know I'd be boiling if we were talking about people's body weight or something else like that. I cannot stand it when people gossip and complain about other people's bodies. Thinking about it, why should hair be any different?

[Sillage]

I don't think anyone really sets out to be offensive in threads like these.

I am trying to keep that in mind :flower:


I know I'd be boiling if we were talking about people's body weight or something else like that. I cannot stand it when people gossip and complain about other people's bodies. Thinking about it, why should hair be any different?

Well said!

[bananahanna]

I definitely look at my hair from the past few years and think, "WHHHYYY". But hey, i liked it at the time and "you only live one" so all there is to do is move forward with healthy hair.

[Flor]

The problem is, a lot of people DON'T KNOW that what they do to their hair is damaging. They simply don't realize that bleaching and heat styling is the cause of their hair condition. Because hairdressers tell them that it's all safe things to do. Instead they blame their hair in general or shampoos/styling products not delivering the results advertised. And even if you tell them, they wouldn't trust you anyway, because what do you know? Have you gone to a beauty school? Nope? Then shut up.

Not that I would ever attempt to tell a perfect stranger what to do with their hair. That would 1) rude, 2) waste of time. Even people that I know that initiated hair conversations with me, wouldn't take my word for anything. Unless hairdressers all of a sudden decide to be honest about the services they provide (which they never will, as long as they charge money for it), nothing will change. Most people do put their trust into "professionals" and don't care to do any research on their own, and they're perfectly content that way.

[spirals]

I work with the public. I notice (in my opinion) bad hair every day. I don't like it, and I have a right to that opinion. And that's as far as it goes; it doesn't come out my mouth. The only time I give advice is when someone asks me about my routine. Thanks to LHC, my hair is growing out nicely and my friends are starting to ask.

[inanna]

A lot of LHC members have first hand experience with people trying to tell them what to do and what not to do with their hair, to "make it better". You'd think that would help us all to realise how subjective "better" can be, and make us less quick to judge others.

My favourite thing about LHC is the supportive atmosphere, not once have I read a picture thread or an advice thread that has been anything but full of praise and positive thinking. I'd love to see more of that positivity instead of judgment when it comes to non-LHCers, too. :twocents:

[Flor]

I don't understand people opposing to this thread. Did anyone actually make fun of someone else's hair? The general notion is - wish it was possible to share tips about hair care more openly and wish people would listen. What's wrong with that? It's up to that person what to do with their hair ultimately, but in the world where hairdressers are not advocating beneficial hair treatments and hair product companies are set to make money on first destroying one's hair and then selling more products to "repair" it, I do think it would be nice to be able to share some light on this subject.

[sarahthegemini]

I think it's okay to have opinions on other people's hair, but to actually want to cofront them and 'teach them' is just so rude. Imagine someone came up to you and said "hey, you wanna know how to have nice hair?" It's not your job to 'fix' others. Fair enough if someone asks you, but don't force it upon them.

(This wasn't aimed at anyone in particular, the use of 'you' was general)

[BowTie]

I'm sorry if this thread has hurt people. To make it absolutely clear I don't go out to make fun of people's hair or take pictures etc. I 'm not perfect either and my hair is not perfect. I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. That woman seemed happy about her hair and I didn't say anything at her - I strongly believe live and let live. Starting this thread was because that woman's hair reminded me of what my hair could have come.. my hair used to be pretty horrible too.

I don't know what else to say. I'm feeling pretty ****ty in general now so I think I will take a break.

[Leafy]

"Because hairdressers tell them that it's all safe things to do.

Unless hairdressers all of a sudden decide to be honest about the services they provide (which they never will, as long as they charge money for it), nothing will change. Most people do put their trust into "professionals" and don't care to do any research on their own, and they're perfectly content that way.


Can I just say...that I hope you're not trying to shove hairdressers together as a whole?

I just want to let you know those comments made me pretty uncomfortable, as I know there are some bad hairdressers, but not all of us are. Also, even though I'm only training, I personally would be completely honest with clients about things like blowdryers, straighteners, products and colours, etc etc. I would want them to know as much as they can to look after the hair, as we have spent time and effort making their hair look nice so they can be happy and also tell their friends and family about us. If I had a client who wanted to colour their hair too often for exmple, then I would advise them against it and space out their colour services more because of obvious reasons. I would also let them know about blowdrying their hair and using straighteners as that will affect how much their colour fades.

I don't know anyone that geuninely thinks that bleaching or heat styling, etc, is good for their hair health wise. It's not our fault, just some people go over the top with things sometimes. Hairdressers aren't evil, and we're just trying to make a living like the rest of us, so please don't take that tone and blame hairdressers for stuff.

Had to get that off my chest...I'm getting out of this thread now as it's going in a completely different direction.

[CurlMonster]

My hair used to be an absolute hair nightmare. I hated how it looked and knew it was completely fried. I also knew that I did things that were damaging to it (bleaching, heat styling, teasing) but I somehow never thought that my hair could be better. I think damaging hair habits create a cycle. I straightened my hair because I thought it was frizzy when it wasn't straightened, and I bleached it because I figured it was already damaged so I may as well have a colour I liked, and I teased because otherwise the frizz towards my ends gave me triangle head. I hated my hair so much that sometimes I cried looking at it. Finding LHC was such a godsend for me - somehow I hadn't realised that my hair wasn't just 'bad', and in fact it could be 'good' if I changed my habits.

So I am of two minds about whether to go preaching the LHC ways. I know some people know how damaged their hair is and don't care - that is when it is totally inappropriate to tell others what could 'help' their hair. But in the case of people like me, I think it's a good thing. In my experience, most people with damaged hair just think their hair is 'bad'. They (like me) don't link the damaging things to how their hair condition is, and don't know that their hair could be much different to how it is.

Sorry my thoughts are so disorganised. It's late and I have a lot of jumbled thoughts about this. :)

[MonaMayfair]

Personally I think this thread is bizarre. I can say, completely honestly, that I haven't learned a single thing from LHC about hair care. I've known all about looking after hair properly since I was 11 or 12 and I'm now in my 20s. So all this information, about heat, dyeing, combing very gently starting at the ends, not washing too often, diluting shampoo or using conditioner instead, using oils, etc has been readily accessible in all the teenage magazines, or whatever, for ages.

I've actually learned TWO things since joining LHC, both via Ktani, who is no longer a member. Honey lightening and Catnip conditioning. But neither of these qualify as basic hair care.

If people dye, backcomb, straighten their hair, wear extensions, it's presumably because they like it like that. And why not? Not everyone likes, or wants, "natural" looking hair. And certainly not everyone wants long hair.

[Flor]

Leafy, I'm glad to hear that you're set on becoming an honest hairdresser. Hopefully you'll get to work in a salon where such attitude is encouraged. Most hairdressers I went to were incredibly pushy with products and services and would always cut my hair shorter than what I wanted. I was told I needed to dye hair when I had less than 10 grey hairs and it took some really stern NO to get those hairdressers off my back. I was told I had to buy their salon products, because my hair NEEDED it. They would always insist on blowdrying my hair in the end. So I'm speaking from personal experience here.

I didn't say hairdressers insist that bleaching and heat styling is GOOD for hair. But they really play down the extend of the potential damage.

[bradlea]

Leafy, I'm glad to hear that you're set on becoming an honest hairdresser. Hopefully you'll get to work in a salon where such attitude is encouraged. Most hairdressers I went to were incredibly pushy with products and services and would always cut my hair shorter than what I wanted. I was told I needed to dye hair when I had less than 10 grey hairs and it took some really stern NO to get those hairdressers off my back. I was told I had to buy their salon products, because my hair NEEDED it. They would always insist on blowdrying my hair in the end. So I'm speaking from personal experience here.

I didn't say hairdressers insist that bleaching and heat styling is GOOD for hair. But they really play down the extend of the potential damage.


You're still speaking in generalizations that aren't universally true. I'm a licensed cosmetologist, and I don't use heat styling at all or chemical processes on my hair. I don't work in a salon (I do freelance) but if someone wanted me to do those things, I would, because people can do whatever they want. I would also tell them all the information they needed about aftercare, to keep their hair as healthy as it can be despite the damage. I'm not the only hairstylist like this.

You also said:
"The problem is, a lot of people DON'T KNOW that what they do to their hair is damaging. They simply don't realize that bleaching and heat styling is the cause of their hair condition. Because hairdressers tell them that it's all safe things to do. Instead they blame their hair in general or shampoos/styling products not delivering the results advertised. And even if you tell them, they wouldn't trust you anyway, because what do you know? Have you gone to a beauty school? Nope? Then shut up."

I don't think I know a single person who heat styles or bleaches their hair and doesn't realize it's damaging. And again, I'm a cosmetologist, and I don't know any hairdressers who would say that bleaching and heat styling aren't damaging. I'm sorry you've had such bad experiences with stylists, but it's insulting to say that all stylists everywhere are bad with hair just because you've had a few experiences with bad ones. That's stereotyping. And there are more than a couple of cosmetologists on this board, none of whom are like the hairstylists you have described.

I used to bleach my hair almost white, and it was pretty thin at the ends. Perhaps you would have seen me in public and thought I didn't know any better, but really, having light hair was just more important to me than having healthy hair. I think people know a lot more than you give them credit for.

[Flor]

I guess I'm sounding offensive to people working in beauty departments that frequent this board. If that's the case, let me make it clear.

1) Yes, I was generalizing, based on what the majority of beauty salons are like. I had some good experiences as well (they were few, but I have very fond memories of those) and if it wasn't for the distance (we're taking different countries here), I'd still be going to those hairdressers, instead of having to learn how to cut my own hair, because I'm afraid to walk into a beauty salon these days.

2) I don't expect any hairdresser that frequently visit this board to lie to their customers and suggest damaging services purely for profit. So please, please, don't take it personally. If you're here, you're not the kind of person I'm talking about.

3) Yes, I've had plenty bad experience, but I'm not just this one unlucky gal. People come to this board every day asking why their hair got so bad all of a sudden, because their hairdresser reassured them it's not the regular bleaching that's to blame. There are threads of people growing out heat-styling and bleaching damage. You see phrases like "I used to do this and that to my hair, I didn't know how bad it was" everywhere! You see threads with people having anxiety over planned hairdressers visits, asking for advice on what to say and how to behave to get the result they want and not get bullied into something they don't want. There are stories of people walking out of salons with nothing done, because hairdresser would try to convince them to do something to their hair that they didn't want. And I will repeat myself again, I never said hairdressers say that bleaching or heat styling is good for hair, but very few would inform customers that it WILL be damaging and extra care will be needed and it will be more fragile. And I do believe it's hairdresser's responsibility to provide complete disclosure of all the after-effects of such procedures. Because people trust them with their hair, as much as they trust doctors with their health.

[Unicorn]

I'd say that these types of threads (and this one in particular) are often the result of the newness of information. Like any hobby or new knowledge, we (humans) use contrast to measure our own progress. It's quite natural to notice our former state on others and very human to discuss our observations.

Yes I notice nightmare hair, I know how they get there because I've made the same journey at some point. Every acknowledgment isn't necessarily a negative judgement on the individual. I've seen hair that is fried to blazes with heat and/or chemicals, I know they've fried it to death with heat o chemicals because it looks the way mine did when I did the some thing. It isn't a judgement on the individual. I'm no better a person now than I was when my hair was fried, I just have a need for a trivial hobby right now and I've always found beauty in hair, I just didn't bother to the time to seek out natural beauty in my own for a long time, I was either playing with it for variety or ignoring it other than beating it into submission for convenience sake.

Natural hair hair is less than common in the western world, so those who are newly discovering it's merits, unsurprisingly wish to comment on their new knowledge/perspective.

Unicorn

[MaryO]

I used ro dye my hair to within an inch of it's life and now I sort of feel sorry for people who do it because I'm not sure they realise how much they're damaging their hair and you can usually see it too!

[chen bao jun]

Flor, I've been on the board now for more than a year. The hairdressers always seem to think you are being personal when you write about negative hairdresser experience. It was surprising to me at first because although I have had nothing but rotten experiences at the hairdressers, I wasn't targeting anyone on this board--hey, from the fact a hairdresser is on here, she or he is obviously an exception. But its best to write some conciliatory thing when discussing things of this nature, such as "I know there are good hairdressers out there, but I went to the salon yesterday and they, etc." It's a politeness we practice here, because we like having them on the board and don't want to hurt anyone's feelings needlessly.

I guess I'm sounding offensive to people working in beauty departments that frequent this board. If that's the case, let me make it clear.

1) Yes, I was generalizing, based on what the majority of beauty salons are like. I had some good experiences as well (they were few, but I have very fond memories of those) and if it wasn't for the distance (we're taking different countries here), I'd still be going to those hairdressers, instead of having to learn how to cut my own hair, because I'm afraid to walk into a beauty salon these days.

2) I don't expect any hairdresser that frequently visit this board to lie to their customers and suggest damaging services purely for profit. So please, please, don't take it personally. If you're here, you're not the kind of person I'm talking about.

3) Yes, I've had plenty bad experience, but I'm not just this one unlucky gal. People come to this board every day asking why their hair got so bad all of a sudden, because their hairdresser reassured them it's not the regular bleaching that's to blame. There are threads of people growing out heat-styling and bleaching damage. You see phrases like "I used to do this and that to my hair, I didn't know how bad it was" everywhere! You see threads with people having anxiety over planned hairdressers visits, asking for advice on what to say and how to behave to get the result they want and not get bullied into something they don't want. There are stories of people walking out of salons with nothing done, because hairdresser would try to convince them to do something to their hair that they didn't want. And I will repeat myself again, I never said hairdressers say that bleaching or heat styling is good for hair, but very few would inform customers that it WILL be damaging and extra care will be needed and it will be more fragile. And I do believe it's hairdresser's responsibility to provide complete disclosure of all the after-effects of such procedures. Because people trust them with their hair, as much as they trust doctors with their health.

[chen bao jun]

Good sum up Unicorn

I'd say that these types of threads (and this one in particular) are often the result of the newness of information. Like any hobby or new knowledge, we (humans) use contrast to measure our own progress. It's quite natural to notice our former state on others and very human to discuss our observations.

Yes I notice nightmare hair, I know how they get there because I've made the same journey at some point. Every acknowledgment isn't necessarily a negative judgement on the individual. I've seen hair that is fried to blazes with heat and/or chemicals, I know they've fried it to death with heat o chemicals because it looks the way mine did when I did the some thing. It isn't a judgement on the individual. I'm no better a person now than I was when my hair was fried, I just have a need for a trivial hobby right now and I've always found beauty in hair, I just didn't bother to the time to seek out natural beauty in my own for a long time, I was either playing with it for variety or ignoring it other than beating it into submission for convenience sake.

Natural hair hair is less than common in the western world, so those who are newly discovering it's merits, unsurprisingly wish to comment on their new knowledge/perspective.

Unicorn

[bradlea]

Flor, I've been on the board now for more than a year. The hairdressers always seem to think you are being personal when you write about negative hairdresser experience. It was surprising to me at first because although I have had nothing but rotten experiences at the hairdressers, I wasn't targeting anyone on this board--hey, from the fact a hairdresser is on here, she or he is obviously an exception. But its best to write some conciliatory thing when discussing things of this nature, such as "I know there are good hairdressers out there, but I went to the salon yesterday and they, etc." It's a politeness we practice here, because we like having them on the board and don't want to hurt anyone's feelings needlessly.

Thanks chen, I think what you said about writing something conciliatory is all I would ask for. I'm sure you can understand how easy it is to feel sort of... targeted as a hairdresser on this board, haha :o which I understand, I don't trust anyone but me either! But still, I just like to see some acknowledgement that the person speaking knows we're not all like that.

[ErinLeigh]

agree. well put

[ErinLeigh]

Honestly, I do not know why offense is taken . No one is saying these things to people in real life. Obviously that would be WRONG. I mean my hair is bleached and I don't take it personally. Its just meant to be fun. OP I am really sorry you feel the need to leave this forum for a while. I am sorry your feelings got hurt.
To me it is just people watching and commenting on something. I have given many people in my mind visual haircuts, color corrections etc. IF hair really interests you it is just something you may do when out and about.

[sharonluvscats]

There's a group of people on this site who are offended by everything. It's absolutely ridiculous. If you don't like a thread, don't read it. I personally enjoy reading threads like these and my hair isn't perfect either.

[PrincessIdril]

Oh, sure. I see damaged hair all the time. However, I feel it's none of my business how they care for their hair. After all, I certainly don't want/need them telling me what I should be doing with MY hair.

This.
Why does it matter to you guys what other people choose to do with their own hair? Some of you are coming across as way too judgmental.

Threads which seek to criticise others (I'm sure it wasn't your intention to create a post like this OP but it did certainly head in that direction) just prove to the media/politicians that the internet is full of bullies.

[Kaelee]

There's a group of people on this site who are offended by everything. It's absolutely ridiculous. If you don't like a thread, don't read it. I personally enjoy reading threads like these and my hair isn't perfect either.

I've noticed that too. There are certain opinions/topics I won't even go near on this site anymore because it's just inviting trouble. It seems to be worse now than it was when I joined here a couple years ago. Just like how I know not to bring up certain topics with certain friends. :lol:

[Kaelee]

Can I just say...that I hope you're not trying to shove hairdressers together as a whole?

I just want to let you know those comments made me pretty uncomfortable, as I know there are some bad hairdressers, but not all of us are. Also, even though I'm only training, I personally would be completely honest with clients about things like blowdryers, straighteners, products and colours, etc etc. I would want them to know as much as they can to look after the hair, as we have spent time and effort making their hair look nice so they can be happy and also tell their friends and family about us. If I had a client who wanted to colour their hair too often for exmple, then I would advise them against it and space out their colour services more because of obvious reasons. I would also let them know about blowdrying their hair and using straighteners as that will affect how much their colour fades.

I don't know anyone that geuninely thinks that bleaching or heat styling, etc, is good for their hair health wise. It's not our fault, just some people go over the top with things sometimes. Hairdressers aren't evil, and we're just trying to make a living like the rest of us, so please don't take that tone and blame hairdressers for stuff.

Had to get that off my chest...I'm getting out of this thread now as it's going in a completely different direction.

Then you're an absolute GEM of a hairdresser!!! Unfortunately most of us have had bad experiences. WE DESPERATELY NEED more hairdressers like you. One bad experience is enough to break someone's trust in stylists forever (after all, you ask for a 1" trim and they hack off 8"...that tends to make you terrified to go to someone else and have the same thing happen!).

I think there are two kinds of people out there when it comes to hair: there are those who love the bleached/chemical colored/shorter (maybe)/heatstyled look and don't really care that it's damaging (more power to them, if it makes you happy, go for it!) Then there are the people who love the look/feel of natural hair and eschew heat, chemicals etc. The majority of the people on this site are the latter. (Personally, I like the look of well done styling, even though I know it's damaging. I wouldn't do it to my own hair, but I enjoy it on others. In fact sometimes I miss the days when I felt free to experiment and didn't mind the damage. :D)

Unfortunately, there are also people who get told their whole life "this is what you do to hair" and can't figure out why it's breaking/split/falling out. I have seen "chemical haircuts" on people and they have no idea what they're doing wrong. I know someone who is actually losing her hair due to perm/whatever else she did. :( Most of the time, they're not happy about the situation either. I feel sad for them, because they were told their whole life "this is how it's done" and never learned any different, so they really didn't know they were doing any harm. I DO wish hairdressers would be more honest, that fashion magazines etc would be more honest and that the information could be put out there- in the mainstream- that if you put harsh chemicals/extreme amounts of heat on your hair/scalp, bad things could happen.

If you know what could happen and you choose to do it anyway, that's your choice and I totally respect that. And oftentimes, it really DOES look great.

[chen bao jun]

If you know what could happen and you choose to do it anyway, that's your choice and I totally respect that. And oftentimes, it really DOES look great.
Yes, I have seen people who look great with damaging things done to their hair.
The fact is, life is unfair, and some of us just do have stronger hair than others.
There are people who can grow to hip length or knee length or even longer (my neighbor had hair down to her feet) and never do anything special, or even do damaging things.
Unfortunately, there are also a lot of people who can't do damaging things at all, or can do them for a WHILE and then get messed up and don't know why.
I don't agree that the information is out there all over.
I never saw a lot of this information until I came on LHC.
to give examples: I thought I had naturally tangly hair. No one had ever taught me not to wash my hair like a shampoo commercial.
I did not know that 'frizz' is not a hairtype and though I had heard of co-washing the messages I got against it (your hair will be dirty) were very strong.
I thought that everybody was supposed to comb their hair. In fact, I thought everybody was supposed to brush their hair and was embarrassed that I had stopped doing that because it just looked so bad. I never heard of finger combing.
I never heard of cool water rinses or vinegar rinses.
I thought satin pillowcases were for sex (going along with satin sheets).
So even though I had natural hair for 13 years, my hair was a serious, serious mess and I was clueless.
I knew my hair had grown longer and felt better when I was younger and strongly suspected all my problems were the natural result of age.

[lapushka]

I never saw a lot of this information until I came on LHC.
to give examples: I thought I had naturally tangly hair. No one had ever taught me not to wash my hair like a shampoo commercial.
I did not know that 'frizz' is not a hairtype and though I had heard of co-washing the messages I got against it (your hair will be dirty) were very strong.
I thought that everybody was supposed to comb their hair. In fact, I thought everybody was supposed to brush their hair and was embarrassed that I had stopped doing that because it just looked so bad. I never heard of finger combing.
I never heard of cool water rinses or vinegar rinses.
I thought satin pillowcases were for sex (going along with satin sheets).
So even though I had natural hair for 13 years, my hair was a serious, serious mess and I was clueless.
I knew my hair had grown longer and felt better when I was younger and strongly suspected all my problems were the natural result of age.

A lot of the "good hair care" has been passed down to me (not bunching hair together when washing, etc.), but my mom didn't know how to take care of wavy hair either. Luckily for the starting years of my life, I didn't have "real" waves (1b/c texture). It only started to change to wavy during puberty, and then took for me to be in my late thirties to realize how wavy hair was supposed to be treated.

[Kaelee]

I think you misunderstood me Chen :flower: I didn't say the information was all over/common I said I wish it WAS. I wish more people knew!

[chen bao jun]

I didn't think you said that. I hadn't read your post when I wrote that actually, Kaelee.
someone else a few pages back said that everyone knew certain things were damaging so if they decided to do them, it was their business.
I was just naming my own experience of not knowing.
I actually thought your post was right on the money.

I think you misunderstood me Chen :flower: I didn't say the information was all over/common I said I wish it WAS. I wish more people knew!

[Kaelee]

I didn't think you said that. I hadn't read your post when I wrote that actually, Kaelee.
someone else a few pages back said that everyone knew certain things were damaging so if they decided to do them, it was their business.
I was just naming my own experience of not knowing.
I actually thought your post was right on the money.

Oh OK. :lol: I was the one that misunderstood then. Carry on! :D

[AmyBeth]

DD2 has the most naturally beautiful hair known to mankind. Thick, shiny, wurly, pretty color. But she insists upon flat ironing it every day, changes its color monthly, and is always experimenting with bangs, layers, razoring, even mohawks. She came to visit me one day with mostly mid back length hair and she let me treat it with coconut oil, deep conditioner and then slept with it in a "plopped" bun. When she woke up, her hair was so beautiful and soft, shiny and the big glossy curls that would have made the Duchess of Cambridge jealous. She loved it!! Then she went home, colored it again, cut it to her shoulders and flat ironed it. She loves changing her hair and playing with it. But she keeps coconut oil on hand and told all her friends about it, and now they like it too.
I don't think anyone here is being really mean spirited about other people's hair. A lot of us on this board seem to value healthy hair and don't realize that that value is not necessarily universal. If some one really wants help for damaged hair, we are here and there is a lot of collective knowledge that can help. Others value the fun factor of playing with products, colors and changing the color and texture of their hair. I think our members were just noticing the differences and talking about them. I don't see the harm or the ill intentions.:flower:

[jacqueline101]

I've noticed people's hair in my area. I notice the condition and style of their hair. I've also noticed the way they treat their hair as far as wearing protective styles. I've noticed a few ladies like others have stated that take care of their long hair by wearing it up in a protective style. I've seen younger women that have longer hair that wear it down and it's ate up with splits.

[piccplayr]

A little girl I know has the most gorgeous waist length 3b super thick hair. The only problem is that she doesn't take care of it the way she should to get the hair she wants. She always tells me how much she loves my hair, and I always respond that I would give anything to have her hair to help build her self confidence. I know she wants help, but she has no idea that there are other ways to care for her hair and is a little bit too young for the LHC.

I realize that some people have been criticizing this thread. but I believe that most of us just want to help people like this beautiful little girl who lacks confidence in herself. I would never offer advice to someone I didn't know without asking, but this girl is someone I am very close to, and absolutely wants her hair to be better. I am sort of at a loss for how to start a conversation with her about changing her habits. My mom, who is dating her dad, is trying to get her to stop ripping her hairbrush though her hair, and I thought introducing her to something like coconut oil might be a good step. Does anyone have any other first steps that might help her start in the right direction?

[Arciela]

I too, often pay attention to peoples hair around where I live XD I live in NYC so I get to see tons and tons of hair styles. The interesting thing is...when people move here from foreign countries I notice they have gorgeous, super long healthy hair. They always tell me like...that back home they could never afford a hair dresser but now that they are in America they are going to go. Now, nothing wrong with hair dressers..they are awesome, etc but what these people do is they start going to the salon and putting bleach, chemicals, etc, blow dryer...straightener on their hair. Next thing I know..a couple months have passed and their hip length gorgeous hair is now APL or less, orangey and looks fried and super unhealthy. So sad to see it happen and it does nearly everytime!

[palaeoqueen]

I don't understand people opposing to this thread. Did anyone actually make fun of someone else's hair? The general notion is - wish it was possible to share tips about hair care more openly and wish people would listen. What's wrong with that? It's up to that person what to do with their hair ultimately, but in the world where hairdressers are not advocating beneficial hair treatments and hair product companies are set to make money on first destroying one's hair and then selling more products to "repair" it, I do think it would be nice to be able to share some light on this subject.

I agree, I have no idea why some people are choosing to take offense but then I'm not at all sensitive.

[palaeoqueen]

Bugger, I've had this (amongst others) thread open in a tab for ages and didn't realise it was a few weeks old, sorry for the bump. I may as well finish what I was saying though now.


I'd say that these types of threads (and this one in particular) are often the result of the newness of information. Like any hobby or new knowledge, we (humans) use contrast to measure our own progress. It's quite natural to notice our former state on others and very human to discuss our observations.

Yes I notice nightmare hair, I know how they get there because I've made the same journey at some point. Every acknowledgment isn't necessarily a negative judgement on the individual. I've seen hair that is fried to blazes with heat and/or chemicals, I know they've fried it to death with heat o chemicals because it looks the way mine did when I did the some thing. It isn't a judgement on the individual. I'm no better a person now than I was when my hair was fried, I just have a need for a trivial hobby right now and I've always found beauty in hair, I just didn't bother to the time to seek out natural beauty in my own for a long time, I was either playing with it for variety or ignoring it other than beating it into submission for convenience sake.

Natural hair hair is less than common in the western world, so those who are newly discovering it's merits, unsurprisingly wish to comment on their new knowledge/perspective.

Unicorn

Beautifully put.


There's a group of people on this site who are offended by everything. It's absolutely ridiculous. If you don't like a thread, don't read it. I personally enjoy reading threads like these and my hair isn't perfect either.

Yep!


I'm sorry if this thread has hurt people. To make it absolutely clear I don't go out to make fun of people's hair or take pictures etc. I 'm not perfect either and my hair is not perfect. I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. That woman seemed happy about her hair and I didn't say anything at her - I strongly believe live and let live. Starting this thread was because that woman's hair reminded me of what my hair could have come.. my hair used to be pretty horrible too.

I don't know what else to say. I'm feeling pretty ****ty in general now so I think I will take a break.

You've done nothing wrong, please don't feel bad.


I treated my hair very badly for years and I had no idea why it misbehaved and wouldn't grow. I'm not exactly dim either, but I'd had years of being told by stylists that my hair was in really good condition and that the heat and bleach WEREN'T damaging. I don't know why I believed that but I did.