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View Full Version : Does your SO have an opinion on your hair goal? And does it matter?



samanthaj08
October 23rd, 2013, 12:46 PM
Just wondering if yours has an opinion like mine does :)

My goal is hip (2 inches to go! yay), but he says he wants it closer to classic. I figured why not.. it's only a few more inches.

Do you care what their opinion is?

ositarosita
October 23rd, 2013, 12:50 PM
Yes he definitely does.. he told me he doesn't like hair that's too long so I assured him I was only growing to hip ... he asked me to grow it to tail bone .. ( it's only a 4" difference)... I care his opinion aside from my own are the only opinions (about myself) that matter to me. So no wI'm aiming for tailbone .... doesn't bother me he's the one that's going to be brushing it lol

Quixii
October 23rd, 2013, 12:53 PM
DBF likes my hair long, but he hasn't expressed a particular goal length for me to have. I remember last year some time I told him I was going to trim an inch or so off and he was all, "Nooooo don't cut your hair!!" :lol:

blue_eyes
October 23rd, 2013, 12:58 PM
Yup, my boyfriend loves long hair as much as I do (he's told me he doesn't find short hair sexy). I had nearly waist long, dark hair when we met & he found it very attractive. I had to cut it to APL after a bad bleaching experience, so now I'm working on growing it all back (with his support :P). When I had to cut that much off I was terrified he'd hate it, but he didn't...and it does grow back after all. He really wants me to grow out my natural colour (blonde) but I have a feeling once he saw a few inches of blonde roots against the rest of my dark brown hair he wouldn't find it too attractive. But we'll have to see about that.

I definitely care about his opinion, but he isn't took picky. As long as it's long he's happy, and I'm the same :P

patienceneeded
October 23rd, 2013, 01:00 PM
Short answer -

Yes. No.

Longer answer - Yes, he has an opinion. Anything long enough to potentially sit on is "too long." However, he supports me in my desire to grow as long as I want to...even past the sit-upon length. And no, it doesn't matter to me what his opinion is in regards to my hair. I would like him to "like" my hair no matter what, of course. However, his opinion does not impact my length choice. It's my hair and I'm the one who has to maintain it.

snakes&stuff
October 23rd, 2013, 01:08 PM
My boyfriend definitely has an opinion... I told him I wanted classic length & he looked at me like I had 3 heads. He said hip length would be too long! He always says there will be spiders living in it. I'm not going to stop growing it though. I want at least hip length, and he'll just have to get over it :P

cranberrymoonz
October 23rd, 2013, 01:21 PM
Yup, my SO loved my hair when it was an earlobe length bob. I have been growing it and he doesn't mind too much, but he doesn't really care for it either. I know he still has hopes of me cutting it short. The funny part is that he'd like to have classic length himself, though.

Aingeal
October 23rd, 2013, 01:24 PM
Yes! Dh loves long hair and when I asked him how long I should grow it, he said tbl if not classic. I'm not sure I want to go to classic, but I'll definitely go for tbl stretched. :) he even gets mad when I put my sleeping cap on because he says he likes it being all over the place at night.

Buddaphlyy
October 23rd, 2013, 01:24 PM
Probably not because he doesn't know I have one. And even if he did, he doesn't do my hair or buy products for it so his opinion (and most other people's) is moot.

BlazingHeart
October 23rd, 2013, 01:27 PM
My other half's only real opinion on my hair is that he likes it. The length doesn't really matter much to him.

tetisheri72
October 23rd, 2013, 01:56 PM
My husband would love it if I grew it down to my ankles. Right now my immediate goal is classic, but I'm thinking my ultimate goal is knee length. He's already said that he will be more than happy to help me with it, and he already has. He helped me with washing it when my broke my finger. I couldn't take the splint off, and I couldn't get the splint wet. Washing my hair one was darn near impossible. He did all the washing, conditioning, and brushing for me.

shutterpillar
October 23rd, 2013, 02:03 PM
His opinion is that above all, I should wear my hair however it makes me happy. That said, he does have a preference for long hair and has no issue with my goal length. I definitely care about his opinion (he is my husband... why wouldn't I value his opinion?) but if I wanted to cut my hair short then I would not let his personal preferences hold me back. We began dating when I had short hair, so... :shrug:

An example on the flip side: he prefers his hair short in typical man's haircut, and I think he looks just fine with that cut. I prefer it to be a little longer and shaggy looking and he knows that. My preferences do not stop him from having me cut his hair how HE likes it cut, and I certainly would not make a big stink about it.

woodswanderer
October 23rd, 2013, 02:14 PM
I think no opinion on length. He doesn't want me to cut it short because he knows I would be sad, but for his own benefit he doesn't care. He does like me to do whatever style I haven't done in a while. He liked headbands for a while, and up for a while, and down....just as long as I change it up once in a while.

Pocahontash
October 23rd, 2013, 02:34 PM
I know my SO would be fine with whatever I chose to do with my hair, but I do recall him saying back in high school that I would look really good with long black hair. Well funny thing 5 years later I have long dark hair! ( My natural is a dirty brown color.) I was talking about cutting my hair in the future after I have kids one day and he said "Okay but just grow it to your butt first before you cut it off!" Haha. Ive always wanted wl hair but recently I have been pondering growing to tbl.

My current length is mbl.

Emichiee
October 23rd, 2013, 02:39 PM
My husband likes long hair and is more than understanding about me growing it.
But that is probably because he is an Ex LHCer, and that is how we met. He was growing his hair then inpspired by metal. Now it is short.

Like I said he likes it long, probably best somewhere around classic length, but he also likes my hair shorter. It just would not be his first choice. I like the way he things cause I can't go wrong. :)

swearnsue
October 23rd, 2013, 03:17 PM
My husband always told me he didn't care how long my hair was but when I started to grow it I can see he has a preference for the longer hair. I can't do a trim when he's home or he freaks out, lol.

He touches my hair at night when he thinks I'm asleep.

spidermom
October 23rd, 2013, 03:23 PM
DH likes long hair, but I think he's kind of tired of it. But he doesn't tell me what to do with my hair because he isn't going to take my advice about what to do with the hair on his head. He kind of perked up the last time I mentioned cutting my hair, though. I could tell he liked the idea.

Ashflower89
October 23rd, 2013, 03:35 PM
My goal is waist, but no one believes I can do it, including my SO =(. I've made a lot of dying mistakes in my life, and my hairs always been between a pixie and an inch above APL, never made it longer before I decided on a shorter style or just wanted to cut off damage. I did find a pic from back in middle school where my hair was almost BSL before my very first dying incident, and between that and this website, I am determined to make it to waist!!! I'm dye free since April this year, and growing out the last damage-removing pixie since May. But yea, when I told my SO about my goal he just sorta laughed and said "yea ok".

makeminea99
October 23rd, 2013, 03:53 PM
My husband prefers mine long, although the shortest I've had it in our time together is collarbone, so he's never seen me with it properly short! :) He doesn't mind how long I decide to grow it, however he does like it when I colour it red with henna. Which is all very well, but I've been growing my natural colour out for almost a year, it appears to be a rather nice earthy brown. He's NOT helping! He keeps saying, 'do it red again, go on!' the blighter!

Applegirl84
October 23rd, 2013, 04:04 PM
My husband compliments my hair, but has never specified if he likes it shorter or longer. I've recently taken to brushing my hair with my bbb while watching tv with him in evening and he hasn't really commented. I know he finds me attractive, but I'm glad he doesn't try to influence the way I look. It's nice to be able to do whatever I want to my hair without worrying about criticism.

katelinn
October 23rd, 2013, 04:08 PM
My husband has never seen me with short hair, but when I jokingly mentioned cutting it short he didn't seem too keen on the idea. He has no opinion on length, he doesn't know of my goal (tbl) and if he did have an opinion it wouldn't really matter.
It's enough sacrifice that I choose not to get a tattoo because he doesn't like them.

Lyv
October 23rd, 2013, 04:29 PM
My husbands only opinion on length so far is that if it's long it should be healthy and shiny. The few times we've really talked about my hair his opinions are that he prefers red because of how it makes my eyes look and when I start to go grey he thinks I should just let it go and not dye because he thinks grey hair is pretty on older women lol, we've never talked about my goal length I don't think. Now I want to ask him to see what he says... His opinion would matter some but not enough to stop me from doing what I want with it.

Rio040113
October 23rd, 2013, 04:29 PM
DBF doesn't have much of an opinion, just that he doesn't want me to be able to sit on it :P His opinion does matter to me of course because he's my partner but hey, it's hair, it can be cut, so it's not like if I grow it to Classic or something it'd be tragic :)

Kherome
October 23rd, 2013, 06:14 PM
Yes he does, and no it doesn't matter.

He would prefer I have BSL hair, as he says my "crazy long hair" is everywhere and in the drain and in his mouth and stuck to his clothes etc...(It's so not that bad, he's just exaggerating, the whiny baby.) But I don't care what he wants. It's my hair, if I cut it, it'll be because I want to. He loves me any way, of course, but he doesn't love my loooong hair. ( I solve that by buying TTs to keep it up and out of the way. )

Rio040113
October 23rd, 2013, 06:32 PM
Yes he does, and no it doesn't matter.

He would prefer I have BSL hair, as he says my "crazy long hair" is everywhere and in the drain and in his mouth and stuck to his clothes etc...(It's so not that bad, he's just exaggerating, the whiny baby.) But I don't care what he wants. It's my hair, if I cut it, it'll be because I want to. He loves me any way, of course, but he doesn't love my loooong hair. ( I solve that by buying TTs to keep it up and out of the way. )

Excellent solution if I may say so! :lol:

jacqueline101
October 23rd, 2013, 06:37 PM
My man likes long hair and wants me to grow it longer then my goal of tail bone. He wants it to reach terminal.

leslissocool
October 23rd, 2013, 06:38 PM
DH was the reason I started to grow my hair! He likes my hair more than I do I think :lol:.

He has long hair, waist length.

see_turtle
October 23rd, 2013, 07:02 PM
My husband prefers short hair. My goal is classic.... lol. There is your answer. Though recently he decided to grow out his hair to maybe shoulder...

Tini'sNewHair
October 23rd, 2013, 07:03 PM
Mine always encourages me to do whatever makes me happy, he compliments me on my looks (he better :p) and on my hair and i really like it. When we sit to watch tv, he will run his hand through my hair the whole time and i sit still as if in a trance because i LOVE IT :D (my hair just passed BSL)

BUT

When i mentioned to him that i want my hair down to classic and even beyond (interested to know what my terminal length is) he was shocked! He thought i gone crazy, he said that thats to long and to expensive to maintain so i called him stupid (without thinking) haha

I only did what he wanted once, and not because he asked but he made the comment how he likes "red heads" so i dyed my hair a darkish red and he really liked it. That was 5 years ago!! It was fun when i first did it but a pain in the butt for me to maintain it so now im back to having my own virgin hair (which is a darkish brown) and he loves it anyway :)

So bottom line is, he DOSNT have a say in the way i want to look but i'm lucky enough to have a man who finds me attractive no matter what i do :)

MadameV
October 23rd, 2013, 07:13 PM
DH liked mine best as a red pixie. It's close to MBL and virgin dark blonde. I have no idea what he would say to my actual goal. I liked his hair best shoulder length. He now buzzes it. Neither of us has a right to complain, so we leave each other alone. It's not a big enough deal to talk about, really.

Diamond.Eyes
October 23rd, 2013, 07:17 PM
DBF really likes long hair...red hair in particular, so lucky me? lol I don't really think he cares what length it is just as long as he can run his fingers through it.
His opinion matters a little. Of course I want my DBF to be attracted to me :shrug:. His opinion matters to me. :flower:

Kherome
October 23rd, 2013, 07:28 PM
Excellent solution if I may say so! :lol:

Indeed, I thought so ;)

Carolyn
October 23rd, 2013, 07:28 PM
I never discuss my hair with Mr Cranky. He has no idea what my hair goals, past or present, might be. I don't even know if he likes long or short hair. And I really don't care. It's my hair and my body to do with as I please. It doesn't occur to me to discuss anything about hair with him. My hair doesn't affect him in any way just as his doesn't affect me. My hair is my own private hobby and I really don't care to share it with him.

patienceneeded
October 23rd, 2013, 07:32 PM
My husband has never seen me with short hair, but when I jokingly mentioned cutting it short he didn't seem too keen on the idea. He has no opinion on length, he doesn't know of my goal (tbl) and if he did have an opinion it wouldn't really matter.
It's enough sacrifice that I choose not to get a tattoo because he doesn't like them.


Your DH sounds like mine. He can't stand tattoos, at all. I would love to have several tattoos. I actually have two tattoos (A celtic knot and then DD's footprints from her birth certificate surrounded by flowers). Both tattoos were a bit of a battle, as he really dislikes the entire tattoo "thing." However, he (now) tolerates mine. More is probably out of the question...probably. I'm easing him in to the idea of my getting a third...

End of thread derailment...

antler_tines
October 23rd, 2013, 07:35 PM
I would say myhusband likes long hair, his was nearly hip length at one time (now shoulder). That being said He really doesn't like super long hair, as in past waist... But I haven't gotten to waist yet, if I ever do I may want to keep growning it and if I do then he will just have to deal with it :P

SereneCurls
October 23rd, 2013, 07:44 PM
Mine knows I'm working to improve the quality of my hair, he even helps me look for sulfates and silicones in conditioners. Lol As for length, I haven't really told him I want it longer. I figure since it's curly it will take him a while to notice it's grown anyway. If he comments either way, I'll care and take it into account.

aisha.christine
October 23rd, 2013, 07:57 PM
He told me that he didn't have an opinion, but I finally milked a semblance of one out of him.
He says he doesn't really care, but he did like it short.
Which sucks a little for him, because I'm growing it out to at least TBL.:p
But really, he likes it either way as long as it's healthy and I like it.

So yes he has an opinion, but no, it doesn't really matter.

ositarosita
October 23rd, 2013, 08:39 PM
My husband has never seen me with short hair, but when I jokingly mentioned cutting it short he didn't seem too keen on the idea. He has no opinion on length, he doesn't know of my goal (tbl) and if he did have an opinion it wouldn't really matter.
It's enough sacrifice that I choose not to get a tattoo because he doesn't like them.

I was the first tattooed woman mine ever dated ... he wasn't a big a fan on himself or anyone else ... after seeing mine for so long he's pondering what his first will be lol

Magalo
October 23rd, 2013, 08:56 PM
SO likes long hair, and he loves that I'm growing mine and taking care of them. TBL sounds perfect to him but he hesitated when I showed classic. He'll probably changes his mind anyway. :)

blue_eyes
October 23rd, 2013, 09:00 PM
Your DH sounds like mine. He can't stand tattoos, at all. I would love to have several tattoos. I actually have two tattoos (A celtic knot and then DD's footprints from her birth certificate surrounded by flowers). Both tattoos were a bit of a battle, as he really dislikes the entire tattoo "thing." However, he (now) tolerates mine. More is probably out of the question...probably. I'm easing him in to the idea of my getting a third...

End of thread derailment...

I'm so glad my boyfriend loves tattoos (I've got 7, one of which is an entire sleeve). My bf's got 3, and we got our sleeves done together by the same artist haha. It's been a huge bonding thing for us, I can't imagine what it'd be like if he wasn't a fan :P

sourgrl
October 23rd, 2013, 09:11 PM
My DH has always preferred my hair long. When we first got married he was less supportive of my big chops. My kids, both boys, even less so. His response now when I tell him I'm just going to let it grow is "whatever you want" He's a smart guy ;) But I did detect a note of relief when I told him I was going to keep it long.

PraiseCheeses
October 23rd, 2013, 09:30 PM
Yes he does, and no it doesn't matter.

He would prefer I have BSL hair, as he says my "crazy long hair" is everywhere and in the drain and in his mouth and stuck to his clothes etc...(It's so not that bad, he's just exaggerating, the whiny baby.) But I don't care what he wants. It's my hair, if I cut it, it'll be because I want to. He loves me any way, of course, but he doesn't love my loooong hair. ( I solve that by buying TTs to keep it up and out of the way. )

:hifive: :bounce:

My boyfriend is pretty quiet about his opinion; if he has a strong opinion I don't know about it. Both his mother and sister had thickthickthick thigh-length hair, so who knows how that's shaped his thoughts on the matter. :lol: He seems supportive but not enthusiastic: he knows I'm on the forums, he occasionally carves me an awesome hairstick, and he learned how to braid it before I had major surgery. But he doesn't pet it or play with it or tell me he can't wait for it to be longer. Oh well. I grow it because I like it.

However, if he really, really strongly disliked it to the point of finding it repulsive, then I'd probably consider a length compromise. And I wouldn't feel sad or like I was being a bad feminist or being untrue to myself, as long as he wasn't issuing ultimatums or otherwise being controlling. I love him. His opinion matters. :shrug:

Uhlizubeth
October 23rd, 2013, 10:58 PM
I am very lucky to have a supportive boyfriend. When we first started dating my hair was barely longer than my chin and I couldn't even put it in a pony tail. By the time my hair finally reached shoulder length I decided that short hair just wasn't for me and began growing it out. At BSL I told him that I was growing it to my waist. When I finally reached waist I mentioned I finally met waist and he told me "what you're not at waist, waist is here *pointing at hips*" silly boy. Then I told him that I actually do want to get there though. I asked him how long he would like my hair to be and he said "below butt!" Which I was pretty happy to hear. I'm not even sure that I can grow it that long but Hip sounds really nice right now.

inanna
October 23rd, 2013, 11:14 PM
However, if he really, really strongly disliked it to the point of finding it repulsive, then I'd probably consider a length compromise. And I wouldn't feel sad or like I was being a bad feminist or being untrue to myself, as long as he wasn't issuing ultimatums or otherwise being controlling. I love him. His opinion matters. :shrug:

I agree with this. If my husband found my long hair really unattractive, I would probably prefer to cut it. I've had short hair before and quite liked it, you can do nice things with a proper haircut. Actually, his preference for longer hair is probably part of the reason why I started growing mine out again. He likes touching and pulling on my hair, which I know would freak a lot of LHCers right out. :whistle:

He doesn't have an opinion on my hair goal, as I don't really know what my goal is. I asked him last night what he would consider to be too long, and he replied that my hair will be too long once it starts "getting in the way", whatever that means. Here's to hoping that won't happen before I reach hip!

Seeshami
October 23rd, 2013, 11:18 PM
Muffin likes it long. Does his opinion matter yes because he is the person who can effect my self esteem the most, but would I let him tell me what to do with my hair. Absolutely not

Agnieszka
October 24th, 2013, 01:37 AM
My husband wants me to cut to bob length. He says my hair is too thin and flat to have it long. At the moment my hair is touching my shoulders and I'm aiming for middle back length. If it will look bad I will consider cutting to bob again as it looks good on me. The only thing is I don't like bob haircut anymore. I'm not sure what I like yet, I want to see how I'm going to look with longer hair as for the last 10 years my hair were chin length. I hope he will like it as his opinion matters to me.

Flor
October 24th, 2013, 02:07 AM
My husband wants me to cut to bob length. He says my hair is too thin and flat to have it long. At the moment my hair is touching my shoulders and I'm aiming for middle back length. If it will look bad I will consider cutting to bob again as it looks good on me. The only thing is I don't like bob haircut anymore. I'm not sure what I like yet, I want to see how I'm going to look with longer hair as for the last 10 years my hair were chin length. I hope he will like it as his opinion matters to me.

Don't cut it until you get to the length you want. Quite often fine hair starts to look better when it grows long enough. I didn't care much for mine at just below shoulder, but now it's starting to pass APL, it's looking a lot fuller and prettier all of a sudden somehow.

My husband's take for years was mostly "Don't cut it!". I didn't listen much :D He seems to like my hair both in a bob and longer, but for some reason the cutting it shorter process freaks him out, until he sees the results and agrees it looks nice. But we never discussed if he had a particular length preference. He knows now I want to try to get to waist and he's supportive.

clioariane
October 24th, 2013, 02:21 AM
My boyfriend loves long hair and fully supports my goal to grow to TBL. It definitely matters to me what he thinks :)

Lyv
October 24th, 2013, 05:37 AM
So since my last post I decided to ask him specifically how he felt about me growing my hair really long and he said he didn't care so I asked what he thought of me growing to knee length and he was totally supportive of it as long as I like it and it's still healthy. I was a little surprised honestly.

jupiterinleo
October 24th, 2013, 09:18 AM
I care about what he thinks but I wouldn't let that ultimately interfere with what my hair length goal would be. Luckily, he loves my hair and likes it long. I actually "converted" him. He used to prefer short hair until we started dating... ;)

Misschilly
October 24th, 2013, 09:38 AM
I don't think my boyfriend care so much..he thinks my hair is long and "why have it long when you always wear it up" but I believe he will get used to every new lenght and don't have a problem with it..If I would point out a goal (I don't really have an yet) I guess he would freak out a little..:P

Almendra
October 24th, 2013, 09:41 AM
Mi goal is tailbone. I'm close to waist now. My boyfriend likes very long hair, but not longer than tailbone, just like me, so he is happy with my goal, because I never had my hair longer than APL/BLS :)
It really matters for me his opinion. Anyway he always says "it's your decision" and then tell me what he really thinks, so I know he is very supportive, and if someday I decide to shave my hair (for example), he will be supportive anyway, but I know he would hate that :p

ladonna
October 24th, 2013, 09:55 AM
My husband loves long hair, I'm thinking he like tbl hair since my hair is almost to my waist and he say's my hair is almost long. If I'm looking at pics on LHC showing waist or longer hair he will sit and look at them with me lol. Oh since I'm getting some grey hairs I asked if I should go grey and have long hair or box dye and have short hair, he said he'd rather I had grey long hair. I started henndigo again though and will continue until I'm bored with it.

Anexia
October 24th, 2013, 11:52 AM
Yes he sure does have an opinion...he would like my hair to be at least bsl and blonde. :) I can agree on the lenght but I'm not too intrested in being blonde :p he only says that because he knows I would never bleach my hair like that.

BrightEyes
October 24th, 2013, 11:57 AM
My DH likes my hair short, which is one reason why I think I've struggled growing it. So I've been wearing my hair up a lot lately and not talking about it. That has helped a lot, and I hope that when my hair is long he'll change his mind and like it.

But for me, his opinion is starting to matter less (only regarding my hair - of course I value his opinion in other matters). I'm coming to realize that I need to grow my hair for myself and no one else. And I know that regardless of the length of my hair, he will always love me.

Anje
October 24th, 2013, 12:01 PM
DH has occasionally expressed concern that future goal lengths of mine would be "too long" and that he liked my hair at the length it was. Then I would reach that new length, and he would find he liked that length better than the last one. This continued from about BSL to tailbone, where I've had my hair for the last few years. I imagine if I told him I was going to try for classic, he'd do the exact same thing. So I'm not telling him anymore, and I'll just let him enjoy it being whatever length it is. :D

spirals
October 24th, 2013, 12:27 PM
He's not my SO yet, but we're headed that direction, pending some things that need to happen. It's complicated.
Anyway, he used to have long hair and it is so cute how he supports my hair love. He will listen to me complain about splits and try to give me advice. He usually sees me with my hair down and says it's "epic." It's not, but it is to him; his opinion is biased. I can tell he doesn't like it worn up, nor the bangs I cut yesterday. I've said maybe I'd go to fingertip, and he didn't seem keen on that. I think he's especially dislike fingertip because I'd probably have to wear it up a lot. Of course, date night means hair down.

As far as whether it matters, I might be persuaded to change my goal, but not pressured. I'd have to be totally ok with it. I've told him changeable things about his appearance I'm not crazy about, but he can do whatever he wants, though my opinion can sway him 'cause I'm cute. :p It's just how it works, I suppose.

Coolcombination
October 24th, 2013, 12:35 PM
My fiancÚ likes my hair, but thinks its on the verge of being too long. I told him I wanted waist by Christmas and he looked at me stupid and said "it'll take you ages to get to waist,it'll be too long!". I just looked back at him and said "I'm an inch from waist now!"
He though hip length was waist length! When I said I was going for a haircut he said "how much are you going to cut off? A couple of inches isit?" I think he'd like my hair between shoulder and apl, like it was when he met me. His opinion would matter if I agreed with it. I wouldn't grow longer than tbl because I wouldn't find it attractive on myself, if he really hated long hair I would think about maintaining between waist and hip.

prettyinpink
October 24th, 2013, 01:43 PM
My boyfriend wants me to cut my hair to collar bone length -_-

AspenSong
October 24th, 2013, 02:22 PM
Hubby is all for my hair being long. When I jokingly threaten to cut it, he tells me no. lol. So I think he's pretty much fine with whatever....However, wouldn't really matter to me one way or the other. If he didn't like it, I'd still have it long. It's my hair at the end of the day. :)

AmyBeth
October 24th, 2013, 04:02 PM
DH is wholly supportive, and he is growing his hair out too!. He even listens when I talk about LHC. He doesn't spend any time at all on his hair, he's totally into benign neglect:). His support matters to me in that I like us being on the same page, but if he wanted me to cut my hair, I would absolutely refuseshudder:.

Prettychild
October 24th, 2013, 04:10 PM
Seeing my hair is so messed up I've had to start from the beginning (I was iron deficient and didn't know it!) my DH wants me to grow hair until it runs out the front door and down the street. ;)

Heni
October 25th, 2013, 03:11 AM
I asked my bf today what length would be nice and what is "too long" for him. He showed TB is good :)) which is quite good because I want my hair to be hip/ tb/ (classic: looove, he would not notice if it is a little longer :P ) He wouldn't say to cut my hair, he says it has to be as long as I want and feel good with it, he would love it if i am in love with that and being confident by it. And I am feeling beautiful with long hair :)

RubberDucky
October 25th, 2013, 05:40 AM
My hubs has been with me through longer hair (below BSL) and short hair (pixie) - and either is fine by him.

Ashflower89
October 25th, 2013, 05:48 AM
Posting on here twice. After asking my SO about it, he suddenly wants me to grow my hair down to my butt. That's a bit further than I'm willing to go because I definitely do not want to sit on it accidentally! =P

otisanek
October 25th, 2013, 08:52 AM
Mine hated my hair when it was bobbed, and has been encouraging me to grow it out to BSL (it's past that now) and now he thinks its getting too long and I need to trim it two or so inches.
I want to get back to lower-waist length hair, but he had bad experiences with an ex who grew hers out past her butt- it apparently gets in the way during "activities" of a grown-up nature.

rose313
October 25th, 2013, 11:45 AM
My boyfriend likes my hair no matter what I do. He doesn't really see the importance of hair, but he supports me in whatever I want to do. He thinks it's astonishing how much I shed though, and we laugh about it.

Marron
October 25th, 2013, 06:25 PM
My SO hates my obsession with my hair. I know I can be very annoying as I regularly want him to take photographs of my hair. I also keep watching other people's hair and compare theirs to mine which makes me complain a lot about my hair.
I don't think he dislikes very long hair (mine is at BSL), but he thinks my mine is fine and would be happy if I stopped being obsessive about it.

Long_hair_bear
October 25th, 2013, 06:59 PM
Mine is neutral for one reason.... He doesn't have to put up with it like I do lol

HintOfMint
October 25th, 2013, 07:06 PM
My dude doesn't know that my ultimate goal is classic, but he's known that hair has been "my thing" for the 3+ years that we've known each other. I doubt he'd protest if he knew, he's not keen on telling others what to do with their bodies or lives, or having people conform to his idea of how things should be.

My former SO actually knows of my goal of classic but his only concern is whether it will be a bigger pain in the butt than it's worth. He'll occasionally say that short hair would be more professional, but he doesn't insist on it or press the point too much.

I know that my college BF would not have approved at all because it's not "normal," and that was sort of his baseline for anything good. Frankly, I'm done with boys who put too much stock into normalcy or conformity and I'm pleased to say I haven't entertained such immaturity since him.

makeminea99
October 26th, 2013, 03:36 PM
Hello! Reporting back from my earlier post: I gave in and have coloured my hair red again (in fairness, I'd been tempted for ages anyway!) - although on this occasion I got my husband to apply it for me. Heheh, I think now he understands why I don't do it very often! I neglected to tell him I could have got the lovely ladies in my local LUSH shop to do it for me. ;) MWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! We are both very happy with the colour.

ErinLeigh
November 15th, 2013, 08:38 AM
I was speaking to my boyfriend about growing my hair long and he said he preferred it between SL and APL as the very longest. I'm confused as I thought men loved longer hair.

I wondered if he thought that longer hair would take more time to style and he just wants me out the door faster, or is he being truly serious. He said it was simply his preference but of course would support me regardless. Now matter how much you do something for "you" you are always going want to think your mate thinks it is fabulous though right? Would you feel good about long hair if your SO didn't like it?
May I ask what your men think of your hair length and if it effects your feelings about it?

and God help the man if he ever leaves me for a long hair girl after saying that! :)

arcane
November 15th, 2013, 09:12 AM
My partner typically refuses to answer questions about his preferences on my appearance. According to him (and he is right with this one) his opinion doesn't matter-as long as I'm happy. I have gotten out of him he likes my hair red and shoulder length but said that was because that's what it was when we met, and everyone still tells me they like me as a redhead best. Now I have waist length blonde hair and he says he likes it too. He's happy it makes me happy. Even if he didn't like it I wouldn't care all that much-I love my mane. (He likes to call it my glorious mane).

There is a common phrase on the LHC-I'm not here to decorate your world. I think that's very true to remind oneself when you start to worry over others opinions of any part of your appearance.

DweamGoiL
November 15th, 2013, 09:20 AM
When I was married, my husband loved my long hair, but after a while, he became frustrated. He imagined wild hot sex with my hair flinging all over the place and him pulling and tuggin on it to his heart's content. In my mind, I pictured tangles and damage...oh no! And personally, pain is not a turn on for me...so double no! After a while, I began top knotting it before sex to take that element off the table entirely. He didn't like that either. However, I am not the type of person that lives for others so I asked for a compromise. I wanted to try some new things in bed that were out of his comfort zone, and he was not down with the program; so I felt pretty guilt free to do with my hair what I pleased since he didn't want to give in to my request. In the end, you have to do what makes you happy. Yes, you should consider that your SO needs to feel attracted to you, but if you're not gouging an eye out or going completely bald, I think that person should respect your individuality as far as what makes you feel good about yourself in the looks department.

sarahthegemini
November 15th, 2013, 09:22 AM
My bf never really comments when I tell him I'm growing out my hair to BSL. I get the impression he prefers long-ish (not by LHC standards) hair, as he was a little upset when I trimmed 3 inches off (although that could be because I broke our 'no hair cutting pact' :p) When we met, I was growing out an asymmetric pixie so my hair was neck-length and awkward.

ositarosita
November 15th, 2013, 09:28 AM
I told him I was aiming for Hip length and he didn't like that ... he would prefer tailbone ...because then it emphasises his favourite part of my body

Jolly-Good-Show
November 15th, 2013, 09:32 AM
My SO has no preference to the length one way or another! If he preferred it shorter, honestly it would probably bother me a little.. buuut I would definitely still grow it long, because I think it's pretty and makes me happy! He does like it when it looks kinda tousled and messy though, just woke up kinda look ^_^ which I prefer as well!! Means I don't really have to do anything :laugh:

melesine
November 15th, 2013, 09:41 AM
He likes my hair long but we haven't discussed my goal length. It's sort of fluid at the moment anyway.

Lirelyn
November 15th, 2013, 10:24 AM
My boyfriend likes long hair, but he had trouble answering my question, "would you like it if I grew my hair down to my butt?"
Finally he answered, "well that would take a long time, wouldn't it?"
Then he got this worried look on his face and reminded me about the time his ex-wife came home with his ex-mother-in-law's haircut. Seemingly this was traumatic; but growing my hair long will take enough time that he can get used to it :)

askan
November 15th, 2013, 10:39 AM
I haven't asked, but i'm pretty sure he doesn't have an oppinion. The one thing he doesn't like is bangs, and I don't think he'd like it if I'd shave it all off..
--

Conversation that just took place:
Me: What if I'd shave my head?
BF: *frowns*
ME: What if I'd cut bangs?
BF: What if you never got to sleep with anyone again?
Me: What if I had hair this long? *points at waist*
BF: What if I had pubic hair this long?? *points at knee*

...feels like starting a challenge is the right thing to do

ErinLeigh
November 15th, 2013, 11:41 AM
I haven't asked, but i'm pretty sure he doesn't have an oppinion. The one thing he doesn't like is bangs, and I don't think he'd like it if I'd shave it all off..
--

Conversation that just took place:
Me: What if I'd shave my head?
BF: *frowns*
ME: What if I'd cut bangs?
BF: What if you never got to sleep with anyone again?
Me: What if I had hair this long? *points at waist*
BF: What if I had pubic hair this long?? *points at knee*

...feels like starting a challenge is the right thing to do

hahahaha that is so funny. I have a feeling my BF will like any length as he is so easy going. I was surprised he even had a preference, although to be honest I had to drag it out of him as I was tired of hearing "i don't care, whatever you like, you are beautiful even if bald bla bla. All sweet but I wanted an opinion. I kinda wonder if he chose his preference lengths as those are what he has seen me in. hmmm Must grow to waist and find out :)

hypersensitive
November 15th, 2013, 07:12 PM
He says it is too long. He wants me to cut it to waist, as does my mom lol. Too bad! Because I'm not cutting it anytime soon! Onward, grow!

Amapola
November 15th, 2013, 08:52 PM
My DH really likes long, straight hair, so whew! I lucked out there. However... when we first met I had nearly waist length hair that I permed. (Yikes, what a memory...) and he liked that fine. Then I cut my hair very short. He was a bit astonished but never once complained or said a word. Then I asked him what he'd think if I grew it out and all he said was, "It's YOUR hair." Which is so true.... but he is really loving my hair the longer it gets. I don't believe I'll ever hear a peep out of him about it, no matter what length it is, even if I dye it purple and green, or shave my head and paint my bald head silver. What he loves is *me*, not the way I look or how long or short my hair is.

Yeah, he's a keeper! :)

emilylightning
November 15th, 2013, 09:30 PM
My darling doesn't really care. Honestly, I wish he'd give me just a little feedback. He agrees with me that long enough to sit on is too long, but other than that, nothing. He wouldn't care even if I shaved it all off, lol. He pretty much ignores me whenever I start ranting about hair, lol. [Not in a mean way, he just starts making cute faces to try to distract me. :p] He also gets really upset whenever I get upset about my hair [or anything in general :/]
He met me when my hair wasn't even full chin-length yet, and he still thought I was cute! He always tells me "It's your hair so it's cute hair." :o

I guess I'm glad that he's not telling me what I can or can't do with my hair, but I want him to like it, too!!! :P

sherber
November 16th, 2013, 01:55 AM
My boyfriend is really laid back about my hair. I have a pixie now and I had it when we met- he tries to imagine me with long hair and he squints and puts things on my head like drapey clothes to try to envision it... It's too funny!

I think he has more of an opinion about how much I talk about my hair than about my actual hair, haha.

millyaulait
November 16th, 2013, 06:13 AM
Nope & nope! :D

redtuss
November 16th, 2013, 06:21 AM
I've got another one of those "don't really care"-guys. Or at least I think so.. Need to pressure him into answering ;)

He has already been with me for a lot of styles like, partly-shaven, completely shaved-bald, pixies, coloured, hennaed and now he is witnessing my growing process and getting back to natural :) He does say that my hair is very nice and that it looks pretty, he calls it my long mane and compliments on my braids and updos; he loves it when I do Leia-buns (he's a Star Wars-fan hehe) or "dwarven"-braids so I suppose he likes it ^^

Also I have told him I want a Mason Pearson-brush for my birthday in 3 weeks so he's gonna get me one!! (eeeeeeep!! :D :D :D)


He thinks it's funny how I fuss nowadays about my hair, he laughs and is a bit put off by my big pile of saved sheds (hehe) and sometimes he goes "yea, you looked a bit bit greasy yesterday" when I have washed my hair but never complains about anything :) He's a darling.

heatherlynnc
November 16th, 2013, 06:26 AM
I think he has more of an opinion about how much I talk about my hair than about my actual hair, haha.

Very funny, this ^^^! My DH likes my hair long and supports me growing it as long as I want. However, back when it was in a short bob he always said he liked that too, so I'm thinking he's flexible.

I was sitting on the couch S&Ding and staring for long periods of time at my hairs... he said I went into a "hair coma."

Sunny_side_up
November 16th, 2013, 08:49 AM
It was shorter and choppy when we got together with full bangs, seen growth and cuts, with and without bangs. Its getting to the length again when its getting trapped under shoulder or arm in bed. I tie it sometimes but feel my thinner length isn't liking being in a high double pony. Its getting annoyin to me... Don't think he pays much attention to the hair, sometimes he pats it?! Haha think that's more directed at my head in general to be silly. I think I could get a much shorter cut next year and go a couple shades lighter and he wouldn't seem fussed :P

ashke50
December 1st, 2013, 02:09 PM
My husband loves my hair, and that I am growing it - he is glad I don't want it short. He prefers it down, rather than up, but he does understand that it is only going to get long if it is looked after properly!

One nice side effect of wearing my hair up for the last few years is that he appreciates it when I wear it down much more than when it was just down all the time.

Even if he didn't like my hair long, I would still carry on, and he would still be supportive, but I am glad he gets it.

nobeltonya
December 1st, 2013, 02:13 PM
My husband actually would like it all the way to knee, but I'm not sure I could handle it that long.. but he always complains that I play with my hair too much and should cut it.. I really don't play with it THAT much.. the main thing is that in the morning I wash it, and either bun or braid it wet. I will leave it that way for 2-3 hours, then have to take it down to let it dry. Then, generally [unless it starts getting in the way] I leave it loose the rest of the day. Then in the evening I put it up again. To him, this is playing with it too much. For me, it doesn't at all bother me and if I thought it was too much I'd cut it myself. :disco:

littlerobot
December 2nd, 2013, 03:14 AM
He said he doesn't really care, that it's my decision. I don't buy it, though.
I've noticed he touches it more the longer it gets!
Even told me during yesterdays cuddle sesh that my hair is "so soft and beautiful" and he's not the kind of guy that showers me with compliments like that.
I'm melting. :crush:

Soltimus
December 2nd, 2013, 04:05 AM
My husband's mother has always had TBL hair so the whole thing about it being long hasn't been an issue for him. I think at first he was a bit weirded out by the idea of growing it longer than TBL because, well, it would be closer to a certain body part and what if I had some sort of bum and hair related accident, ha ha ha. He seems to be going along with the idea of me growing it to classic now (it's somewhere between waist and hip+ because of U-cut and layers).

I do ask him what he thinks about things. I'd like him to be happy with his wife, only that doesn't mean he's the boss of me, you know? I just like to hear his opinion on things. It gives me a chance to explain my plans and ideas about growing my hair out. Like, I'm stretching washes right now and I wash it twice a week. It does get a bit funky the day before the wash and I think if I'd just done it and not explained my thoughts and plans about it he might have thought it was a bit icky, but because I do involve him in my plans he has a higher tolerance of it. If that makes any sense? His ex had a really nasty hygiene problem. Wouldn't wash, wore no socks in his boots and ruined them, never brushed her teeth etc etc etc, so being clean means a lot to him. I feel I owe him at least a tiny explanation so he doesn't freak out and think it's going to happen all over again, ha ha ha!

FuzzyBlackWaves
December 2nd, 2013, 05:05 AM
I don't have a SO currently but apparent from one who was adamant pixie length and shorter was the only attractive lengths for a woman they've all been really supportive. I grow my hair to suit my own tastes not anybody else's.

breezefaerie
December 2nd, 2013, 08:44 AM
Surprisingly, my SO recently told me she would prefer I grow it no longer than knee length.
Surprising because at one time, her preferred length on my was no longer than waist!

wrh452
December 2nd, 2013, 09:27 AM
My husband does not care in the slightest and I actually have a hard time getting him to form an opinion about it. I will try asking him what color he likes best on me, or length or bangs ect, and all he says is "Your hair is always pretty". Thanks for the compliment, but I need a little more help here! Oh well. At least he doesn't try to control it.

bubah353
December 2nd, 2013, 09:30 AM
I reached my initial goal of waist recently and decided I am going to continue to grow it. I'm not sure how long though, so I asked my bf and he really want me to grow my hair classic. I must say I was shocked at how excited he was. Sometimes when I get out of the shower he'll be like "wow you're hair's getting really long". I love how supportive he is.

tbonita
December 2nd, 2013, 09:37 AM
Pixie weighing in here. My husband laments the fact that I cut my hair off to 'start fresh'. As do I but it had to be done. My mini-goal is APL but it's REALLY BSL+... And he would like to see it at BSL. He is not an a** about it: he still gives me complements, notices how my hair is getting more thick and healthy... But it's length he's after. Well, so am I. He would've rather me had damaged destroyed ratty black/red/brown hair with a demarcation line than short hair, but that's where our opinions differ !

teenerz
December 2nd, 2013, 09:44 AM
My SO doesn't have an opinion really, he just likes it long - he has told me that he's not a fan of short hair, which is fine as I don't have any plans to ever cut it any shorter than my shoulders (or maybe my chin, maybe).

FairHairedDane
December 2nd, 2013, 10:23 AM
My SO loves my hair the more it grows, so he is super supportive of me growing it to classic.

Mizumi
December 2nd, 2013, 12:11 PM
My SO likes my hair, he likes idea of growing it longer. I even once asked him about my goal classic length and he assumed: whatever do you do, it will look pretty :)

Andeee
December 2nd, 2013, 12:29 PM
My husband is happy if I'm happy. He thinks my hair is pretty, but wouldn't mind if I cut it (which I won't) or let it grow longer. I've told him I'm thinking of growing it to classic but he thinks that long is probably not practical. He'll see when it get there that it will be easy enough to care for.

EmmaDStrange
December 2nd, 2013, 12:58 PM
Mine is neither supportive nor negative about it, he says 'do whatever you want'. And even with that non-chalant attitude I know he loves me for me, but I do know he prefers my hair down than up. He's a long hair himself, so I guess he wouldn't have a leg to stand on if he wanted me to cut my hair anyway! (which I wouldn't).

So all in all, what he thinks matters to me emotionally, but I don't think I'd change my hair goals because of it, I'd probably reconsider my relationship before cutting my hair off, because after all... my hair is me.

veryhairyfairy
December 3rd, 2013, 07:56 AM
Awwww, I love seeing all you guys' stories about sweet SOs! :crush:

When I met my man a few years ago I had BSL hair, and he compliments my hair more the longer it gets. Once it got to waist he asked me kind of worriedly if I would ever cut it short, and when I told him that my current length was the shortest I'd ever go, he said "Yayyyyyy!". :lol:

I've told him that I'm going to keep growing it, and I don't think he's ever expressed a negative opinion (but he's not the type to do that, anyway). I did show him that I may have hair past my butt at some point, and he said I'd look like Eve, so I count that as approval lol.

I will say, though, that I don't think he'd be too happy if I decided to grow my henna out. He's only ever known me as a henna-red-head, and I think it's part of my identity to him. It makes me happy because I love love love having red hair, and I don't ever plan on changing my color.

maborosi
December 3rd, 2013, 08:30 AM
My DBF likes my hair and supports my goals. He didn't seem to mind when I told him that I wanted hair past classic eventually.

~maborosi~