Feeling bad--I would appreciate some advice

[Amahaitz]

A couple of times recently, people have estimated me to be quite a bit older than I am, and it is making me feel bad. I try not to care, but it is really bothering me.

[Amahaitz]

I guess that didn't work... Can someone tell me how to post a photo? :)

[leslissocool]

You could upload them to your album in LHC

Just FYI, I have a friend who everyone thinks is older because of grey hair. they see it and automatically think she's older, the same way they see me short and think I'm a teenager. Many times it's not how you actually look, but what the people see (the impressions) and their assumptions.

[redtuss]

I looked at the picture at your profile, I don't know if it's the same one that you uploaded to Photobucket?

I don't think you need to lose any weight nor do I think you have a high forehead, it's a little bit hard to tell what shape your face has from the picture - it looks oval to me? Oval faces can wear just about any haircut so that is a plus :) Have you had bangs before and what did you think of them - were they comfortable and felt good? If the answer to that question is yes then you should get bangs again, you need to be happy with them since it can be a hassle at times..
Silver and grey hair does not always need to be aging :) Maybe you need to try new colours of clothing or jewelry and makeup (if you wear that) to compliment your new lighter hair colour? There was a thread that had a link to a website that I cannot remember the name too, it was all about rocking silver or white hair, I think it was a manufacturer of shampoo? Maybe someone else remembers the name of the website, it had beautiful pictures and some info.

You have practically no wrinkles but you look a bit tired under the eyes, maybe that is what is making people think you are older? Do you get enough sleep and do you eat well? Have you had your vitamin levels checked out recently, I know many who get dark underneath the eyes if they are lacking in iron. Sometimes it's "just genetics" and some people are darker there then others, but make sure that everything is well with your health first.
If your vitamins and hormon-levels are good and you are getting enough sleep and water then it can help with ice-masks to reduce the puffiness under the eyes. For some people it also help cutting sugar and gluten if I remember correctly.

I love your complexion in the picture on your profile, it's very rosy and pretty and your lips and eyes are beautiful! What is your eye colour?

[cathair]

A little help with your photo... hope you don't mind.

http://i785.photobucket.com/albums/yy140/amahaitz/October222103001_zps5fd2631a.jpg

I didn't look at the age on your profile before I looked at your photo and I would have actually put you younger than your stated age. Probably in your 30's somewhere.

I have noticed if I wear my hair in a bun, some people assume I am older which I dislike. I keep getting told to put it down or put it in a ponytail. I also have grey bits of hair which seem to make some people think I am much older than I am. I have no intention of dying my hair or ponytailing it though, I just don't want to right now, I want it to be healthy and growing longer.

I can empathise with being told you look older than you are. Apologies to anyone that has hear me whinge about this before, but I still can't get over a shop assistant asking me if I needed help to use an escalator! I don't even understand how they would have intended to help! I dread to think what age she thought I was.

I think you are lucky that you have light hair, it blends with grey better than dark hair. I wear glasses too. I don't think glasses will necessarily make you look older, but many people prefer other people without them. I forgot this until last time I went out and people keep taking them off my face.

If I had to pick one thing that might be aging you, I would probably say that your eyebrows are not too visible and that tends to happen to older people. But I honestly thought you looked younger than your profile age :)

[Vrindi]

Honestly, trying to "look younger" or "better" is a total waste of time, because it's entirely dependent on other people's perceptions. It's much better to focus on being healthy. Looking and feeling younger happens when you're healthy as a natural side effect, not something you have to obsess over. You said you have to lose weight. Instead of wearing contacts that hurt or covering up grays or hiding parts of your body, put all that energy into examining your diet and finding a form of exercise that inspires you. There's an activity for every body type and every kind of disability. You just have to be willing to do it. Live a lifestyle where you feel you can honestly say, "I take really good care of my body, inside and out, and I'm not making excuses for myself." This is not easy, but once you commit to it, you will know you look/feel younger, regardless of what other people say, and you will truly have to confidence to not care what they have to say in the first place.

Take care of yourself, and you will appear younger. Fake it, and you won't succeed much or at all. Try to cover up or hide things and you're not going to fix anything at all. If you want to dye your hair because you like how it looks, then go for it, but that alone won't do anything about your age.

[Madora]

A couple of times recently, people have estimated me to be quite a bit older than I am, and it is making me feel bad. I try not to care, but it is really bothering me. I can't stop obsessing about what I could do to look better. I need to lose weight--that goes without saying. But should I dye my hair to cover up the grey and silver? Get bangs cut to cover up my incredibly high forehead? Wear my contacts all time even though they hurt my eyes? I am going to do my best to post a picture here (I have never done it before, so I'm not sure what I'm doing). If anyone here would look at itand tell me honestly what you think, I would really appreciate it. Do I look old? How old do I look? I took my glasses off for this picture so keep in mind that it's not how I look all the time, but close enough. Thank you. I promise you won't hurt my feelings--I would not post something like this if I didn't want to hear the truth. http://s785.photobucket.com/user/amahaitz/media/October222103001_zps5fd2631a.jpg.html?filters[user]=137724704&filters[recent]=1&sort=1&o=1

As I couldn't tell how old you were (not good at guessing ages) I checked your profile stats. You look perfectly fine to me...beautiful skin and lovely eyes.

Speaking of eyes...whatever else you do, please, treat them gently and wear glasses since contacts hurt them. You've only one pair of eyes and should safeguard them as much as possible.

As far as your hair is concerned, I'd keep the color as is. If you're distressed about the grey and want to cover it, then select a shade that is closer to your natural color and facial tones (of course, if you want to go red/auburn, that's perfectly ok too). Just be cautious that what you're using is easily gotten rid of (just in case) and more importantly, is not deleterious to your hair.

I've a high forehead too but stray hairs drive me nuts, so no bangs for me. If you want to try bangs, then go for it...but you'll always need to keep 'em trimmed and out of your way (if they bug you).

I'm not clothes conscious at all but if you wear lighter colored clothes perhaps that will help downplay the age aspect.

Bottom line: do what's good for you (and be sure to eat healthy) and to hell with what others think. Age is only important if you're a cheese!:cheese:

[Leeloo]

A couple of times recently, people have estimated me to be quite a bit older than I am, and it is making me feel bad. I try not to care, but it is really bothering me. I can't stop obsessing about what I could do to look better. I need to lose weight--that goes without saying. But should I dye my hair to cover up the grey and silver? Get bangs cut to cover up my incredibly high forehead? Wear my contacts all time even though they hurt my eyes? I am going to do my best to post a picture here (I have never done it before, so I'm not sure what I'm doing). If anyone here would look at itand tell me honestly what you think, I would really appreciate it. Do I look old? How old do I look? I took my glasses off for this picture so keep in mind that it's not how I look all the time, but close enough. Thank you. I promise you won't hurt my feelings--I would not post something like this if I didn't want to hear the truth. http://s785.photobucket.com/user/amahaitz/media/October222103001_zps5fd2631a.jpg.html?filters[user]=137724704&filters[recent]=1&sort=1&o=1

I think you look great in this picture. If your profile snippet is correct, it says you’re 43 years old, then to me you look ALOT younger than that. Seriously, I don’t know what those people are talking about. Maybe people confuse looking older with looking tired. If you need a little pick me up suggestions to make you feel better here are a few. Coloring greys is something that could lift your spirits (I would go with natural methods like catnip rinses or a deposit only dye to keep damage to a minimum). Start paying close attention to your diet and make sure you get enough sleep. Drink plenty of water. Start to exercise regularly (it doesn’t have to be vigorous exercise; it will make your skin glow). It’s not your weight, but how you carry yourself, so exercise will improve your posture. Start a more involved skin care routine. Maybe pick up some new clothing items (sometimes going to more hugging clothing makes you more motivated to keep up with the exercise routine  ). Please ignore things that you are already doing, I’m just throwing out there everything I can think of. I wouldn’t wear contact lenses if they hurt your eyes though. And I wouldn’t get bangs; there is nothing wrong with a high forehead.

[ladonna]

I can't believe people think you are older, I think you look more like 10 years younger! You have beautiful skin, I'm jealous. However bun's do tend to make people seem older, maybe thats it? I tend to look older and thinner when my hair is up and then when my hair is down people ask if I'm babysitting my kids :rolleyes: because I look so young.

[Flor]

Seriously, I don’t know what those people are talking about. Maybe people confuse looking older with looking tired.

Very true.

[Leeloo]

Age is only important if you're a cheese!:cheese:

Love this!

[summergreen]

You have a very young looking face IMO - I also didn't notice your age before I looked at the pic and I also would have said 30s. And not even late 30s! I think your colouring (skin, eyes and hair) go well with the silvers. If you are carrying any extra weight, which I can't see that you are, it doesn't show in your face - you have a lovely shaped face, so don't go making it haggard with dieting if it's not necessary!

I agree with Vrindi that faking it doesn't always make people look younger - to me there's nothing more aging than that haunted look people get when they're desperately trying to outrun the aging process! If you want a change, go for it, but you look fine as you are! :)

[spidermom]

If you really need a pick-me-up, experiment with makeup first. I agree that your brows could use a bit more definition. Most of the time I leave mine invisible, but if I'm feeling down or have a special occasion, I tweeze the strays and use an eyebrow pencil. A bit of concealer at the inner corner and under your eyes would probably be good, too. Maybe you could get a cosmetic makeover; that's fun.

I got temporary coppery hair color at the salon just before my daughter's wedding in August, and it really perked up my appearance and warmed my skin a lot. It visually subtracted years; I won't lie. It hasn't been as temporary as I expected, though. I've still got quite a bit of that color 2 months later, although it looks streaked in rather than there being a grow-out line. I'm very glad of that, and I would recommend that if you want to use some color, make it the temporary kind.

[ratgirldjh]

You don't look old to me! In fact if you smiled you would be very pretty. And I love your hair :)

I've been through this myself. I'm 53 and I realize I look quite old. I think having a little weight on you is very good for looking younger - it kind of 'rounds and plumps' things out. I know this because I am too thin right now, and look better plumper.

I tried the cutting bangs thing. I also cut my hair to a chin length bob this summer. Really, it did help a lot. I looked a lot younger and felt younger as well. I henna my hair so the color isn't an issue with me.

BUT - I realized I don't enjoy having bangs or even shorter hair. Not being able to put all my hair up and get it out of my way is just not an option for me. So I am in the process of growing out bangs and length and can't wait for it to get long enough to put up in a hairstick again.

In the long run for me it is better to be comfortable. Sure, I can look younger by doing these things, but it just didn't seem worth it.

You will have to do what makes you feel good about yourself and please try not to let what others say to you make your image of yourself.

:) Well anyway I decided for me being me was the best way to go... too bad if I look 'old'.

[Liz_park]

I think you look beautiful!

I agree that age is only important if you are cheese.

That being said, feeling good about yourself is important, and I find even small changes can make a big difference. I have a few healthy suggestions that have helped me:

1) Try to do 30 minutes of exercise - walking somewhere, light cardio, weights, yoga, etc. - per day. There is a great video that a colleague of mine made. He makes a very strong case for why you should do this, it's called "23 and a half hours" and I've posted the link below.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aUaInS6HIGo

2) Invest in a nice moisturizer with sunscreen in it. Mine has SPF50 in it, but even SPF20 is great. Clinique has some nice moisturizers with SPF in them, but any brand will do. Protecting your skin from sun damage will have long term positive effects on how you feel about your aging. You are also protecting your face from skin cancer, and trust me, you do not want a melanoma or a squamous cell carcinoma on your face.

3) Drinking water. I know you've probably heard this a million times before but this one always makes me feel younger and great and healthy! If you're not into plain water, I like to add a squeeze of lemon to mine. Or you can make "spa water" which is a big jug of water with cucumber, lemon slices, and a sprig of mint or rosemary added in. Put it in the fridge overnight and enjoy each morning.

4) Vitamin C: Make sure you're getting enough of this. Eat fresh oranges, drink some fresh orange juice, eat fruits and veggies with vitamin c, and if all else fails, a supplement can help.

5) Sleep: Making sure you get a restful sleep is critical to feeling happy and healthy. If you are not getting enough, try to focus on making a relaxing sleep routine and schedule an early bedtime. No TV or computer an hour before bed. Try reading or having a glass of warm milk before bed. Lavender essential oil on your wrists or lavender spray on your pillows can help you relax. Sleep needs to be a priority :)

I hope some of this helps!

[Andeee]

I am purposely not looking at anyone else's replies until after I post mine as I didn't want to be influenced by anyone. I think you have a quite an attractive face with big eyes and full lips and expressive brows. If you were smiling you'd be very pretty!

You look in your mid to late 30s at most, but you do have what seems to be prematurely grey hair, but there is always dye if you decide to go that route (I have!).

[LadyCelestina]

I don't know what you are talking about.I thought you were around thirty,thirty something...And that I am guessing too much and in reality you'll be something like 26 or what.

[Andeee]

Ah, I see now from your profile that you are 43. So, my guess of mid-late 30s should make you happy!

[AmyBeth]

As soon as I saw the picture, I said to myself "What a lovely face!". And I would truly guess about 35 years old. You should smile, I bet you'd look even lovelier. If you can find an esthetician to shape your brows and help you either dye or touch them up with a pencil, that might pick up your morale. I would only suggest hair color if you really want it. Your skin is enviable, the color and texture is so pretty. You just look so sad. I'm telling you the truth as I see it, you look good for 43.
I recently saw an article on MSN about a study which showed that people guess the ages of people by the contrast of eyebrows and lips to the rest of the facial skin, so emphasizing the coloring of those features might help.

[Magalo]

I also think you're beautiful! I don't think your forehead or hair is what makes people think you're older. But if YOU (I said you!) are bothered by your grey hair, you look like you have light hair so you could use cassia once in a while, it will makes your grey look blonder without altering them (since it fades anyway) so you don't have to grow them out if you get tired of the cassia. It will makes them look more... subtle!

I think what could be aging you is: your eyebrows, as written by other posters. I'm only 20 but my eyebrows are light and sparse, and filling them lightly with a pencil (or eye powder) really makes me look better. You could try it to see if you like it, and it only take me one more minute to get ready in the morning!

Other thing is the bags under your eyes. I know some people, like my best friend (19 years old!) just have them genetically, and it may be your case but there's a lot of (natural) things you try to minimize them. On a 20 years old it doesn't make a difference, but on a 40 years old it can look like you're older and tired. Cucumber slices 10-15 min a day, full nights of sleep, cold tea bags, massage, drink cranberry juice/enough water, etc...

Your glasses aren't in the picture, but they can age you if they aren't fashionable (example: thin, rectangle metal frames). If it's the case, you could get a trendier pair for when you're going out if you don't like wearing lenses. Clearlycontacts(canada)/Coastal (US) have a first-pair-of-glasses-for-free deal at the moment, you only have to pay for special stuff on the lenses (like anti-reflective coating if you need it) and the frames are free (just saying :p).

But overall you have beautiful eyes, very nice skin, nice lips and a lovely face shape. You have everything that is the most important! :p Hope it helps. :)

[Anje]

For what it's worth, to me you look lovely, young, and worn out. I think it's the bags under the eyes and your overall expression, and I don't have a whole lot of advice for that, so you'll have to look at other folks'. Do make sure you're taking care of yourself and your personal needs -- sleep, stress, and all! The other thing I think might help is a pair of funky chunky youthful glasses that have a bottom frame that obscures the under-eye area. It'll also get you past the contacts-hurting problem, which I greatly sympathize with. Skip the bangs -- in my opinion, they often don't get along very well with glasses, and high foreheads are intelligent-looking.

[Liz_park]

I think what could be aging you is: your eyebrows, as written by other posters. I'm only 20 but my eyebrows are light and sparse, and filling them lightly with a pencil (or eye powder) really makes me look better. You could try it to see if you like it, and it only take me one more minute to get ready in the morning!


For eyebrows, I just thought I would mention one more thing. My girlfriend used to have quite thin/sparse eyebrows and about a year ago she started using latisse on them. You just paint a little drop of it on the area where you want to regrow hair or make hair denser. After a few months her eyebrows came in beautifully and now she has them threaded professionally. It really improved her look.

[Majormiles]

I would honestly reply that you look late 30s/40 the oldest to me.

These people that have said you look older...have a think about who they are. Is there a reason that they might have said this? In hat situation did they say it? Could they be over estimating to possibly make themselves feel better? Etc etc.

Don't feel bad, I think you look great!

[renia22]

I think you are a lovely woman and dont think you need to start messing with your appearance. I would have guessed 30s also.

[getoffmyskittle]

First of all, you're beautiful; second of all, only bartenders are that good at guessing people's ages. I would put NO stock in what people are saying.

I also think the fact that so many people (yes, men too) color their hair has completely messed up our sense of when people start to grey. So people would probably start guessing younger if you colored your hair (but I don't think you need to because grey is elegant).

[Macaroni]

You are one pretty lady, whatever your age. You have a porcelain complexion and blue eyes! Lucky.

I'd only suggest two small changes, a little under eye concealer and a rosier lipstick.

[littlemonster]

My guess is it's the under eye bags. You can try things to naturally minimise, or makeup to hide the shadows will mostly eliminate them (it's really the line below them where shadow falls that is noticable). If you're wearing contacts that hurt, that could be making it a lot worse. Glasses don't age people typically.

I don't think your greys/silvers age you, I tend to think they only do on short perms because in the UK that's a granny hairstyle. But if you did want to try colouring them, some of the photos of them coloured with cassia look pretty, and I think it's non permanent.

I wouldn't worry overly though, most people aren't that great at judging ages, a couple of overs mean nothing.

[DragonFlyPie]

I would have also guessed mid-30's, didn't look at your age before hand.

I think a little bit of rosy cheeks & glossy rosy lips would help :) I can't leave the house without a rosy cream blush, red tinted gloss, and mascara. I just look like a lifeless, pale corpse. That hint of color really adds life to my drab face. I go from looking almost sickly to looking like I have a youthful healthy glow. If you don't generally wear much makeup, I'd suggest playing around with NYX brand. You can buy online or at Ulta (and some Targets & drug stores). They are one of my favorite "low-end" brands. Their quality is really good. I prefer many of their products over MAC (and other over-priced, over-hyped brands) any day. NYX has excellent cream blushes & tinted lip glosses.

I think you have a beautiful face. You hair looks fine to me, as well. Perhaps do cassia or henna, if you're interested in a little color. I'm always partial to red though :) Just love red on everyone LOL

[jacqueline101]

I'm not good at the age guessing game but I do think you're pretty. You have a smooth skin tone and nice eyes. Your hair looks alright to me. I'm not a make up expert but maybe you could hide the dark circles under your eyes. I'm not going to lie to you and recommend a product because I don't know what products are good to use myself. I'd wear glasses to advoid hurting your eyes maybe something in a modern youthful color or frame. As far as your bun goes it looks great but I've had people tell me in the past they think of older women wearing buns. That might be the issue with the bun. I don't know of any youthful styles but some of lovely ladies might have a YouTube page they could recommend.

[ravenreed]

I guessed 30's as well. I suggest emphasizing brows and eye lashes. Since I hit my 40's both are very faded on me, and when I use some brow gel and mascara a look much younger.

[Seeshami]

I am not going to bother guessing an age or any of that nonsense but recycle the pearl of wisdom I gave a coworker uncomfortable with her skin and wanting to swear off make up like I have.

The only person who gets a say and opinion in your looks is you. And who ever has something to say about it negative is the person who really has the problem.

Yes I have problem skin, yes some days I look like and adult and some days I look like a pubescent teen and any one who can't see through my acne can't keep their mouth shut will get verbal whip lash from my rant on skin conditions.

[Quixii]

I would guess 38 looking at your picture.

Honestly, I think society's quest to look younger is really stupid. Everyone gets old. Why try to cover it up? Just be you.

[Kiwiwi]

I guessed 38, too.

You are beautiful!

[thirstylocks]

I guessed around 10 years younger than the age you listed. Your face looks really young to me, IDK why someone would mistake you for older besides the grey hair. Its frustrating that grey hair = old age to most people. No, I don't think you should dye to look younger. You should dye it only because you want to change your hair color.

[WilfredAllen]

I would guess you as mid/late thirties from your picture BUT that could change depending on how you dress and what age you act like. From that pic, I think you look really pretty without bangs, but I love that one strand on your face.

Your eyes are crazy blue! You shouldn't wear your contacts if they hurt you (obviously) but maybe you could try a different brand? Glasses frames can either be very flattering or very unflattering depending on the frames. If you're looking to make a quick change, new frames may be a good place to start (plus glasses shopping is fun!!!!). Make sure your frame colour matches your skin tone (warm/cool) - I found that makes a big difference for me

[Kaelee]

Don't worry OP, you're gorgeous!!! You look TIRED though. Are you getting enough sleep? Insomnia can definitely age you, but it's fixable. ;)

[verenikiscoma]

Your eyes are stunning. It was the first thing I noticed. I just have to say it again. They are beautiful!

Your complexion is very clear, your hair looks lovely, I just think you look sad in the picture and smiling would change it completely! Like others have mentioned, it's all about feeling good in your own skin. You are the one who has to live with yourself. I wouldn't make any drastic changes for anyone else because it seems to me that the people that usually make these comments and upset you (e.g. you look too old, too thin, too whatever) always find something else they don't like and never really stop. It's really important for you to be healthy and happy and if you feel your lifestyle needs to change for you to be happy, like exercise more or eating more fruit please do it, I just wouldn't make changes for others.

Did I mention just how stunning your eyes look? Please don't make them suffer in contacts. Find some glasses that you like and feel confident in. Change what you want to change but only for you, and only do it when you are sure they need to change.

[ErinLeigh]

I think you are beautiful. But since you want advice, her goes.
Bangs will give a more youthful appearance in other peoples mind. Long ones though. People associate bangs with "younger" so if you want bangs then that will offer that illusion. I do not think your forehead is too big at all.
Color...hmmmm perhaps cassia or catnip tea to freshen up the grays? Personally I think they blend well already but I can understand the feeling of dismay if others commenting.
Henna/cassia mix might give you a brilliant color and shine that people also associate with youth. If you do that though I would suggest an eyebrow pencil to make those eyes really pop. Lighter eyebrows are also associated with being "older"

Glasses...without seeing them I cannot tell if they age, but if you don't already perhaps consider a nice pair of more trendy glasses. Narrow black frames, or a cool tortoise shell or even red! Some thing that says "hey glasses are fun"

Honestly, no matter what you do or change, you are gorgeous. Your features have a lovely harmony and I think people are rude for not saying that instead of saying you look older.
I do understand your feeling though. I just turns 40 and it is a bit of a mind bender trying to wonder where you fit in as far as "beauty" to the conventional world.

[ErinLeigh]

Also, I suggest playing up those full lips with a nice sheer deep pink gloss. Again, you are gorgeous. I hope you see what we see

[breezefaerie]

I agree with all that has been said above :)

I too have been mistaken for someone older when my hair was shorter, and it was hurtful. Someone thought I was the mother of my SO. Made me feel bad but also made me take a look at myself.

I changed my makeup palette and grew out my hair. My wire framed glasses have been changed out to chunky black frames that have a slight up tilt at the corners.
Now people don't believe me when then know my age.

You are perfectly lovely!

[Amahaitz]

Thank you so, so much for your responses, to all of you. Your comments have helped me not only to identify some things I can change if I choose to, but also to put all this in a bit better perspective. I can't tell you how much better you have all made me feel. Thanks again! :)

[Mustang Suzy]

Amahaitz - I'm glad you are feeling better. The only thing I can add is be comfortable. Life is too short to fuss with things that make you uncomfortable - thus I've ditched the stilettos and tight clothes. To me an older woman represents wisdom, experience, and the ability to get through life. Embrace who you are.

[Firefox7275]

I am a very similar age to you but look a lot younger than my years, to me you look your age but no more than that. For me part of it is zero undereye bags (lucky genetics) and that I have bright coloured hair/ wear clothing in jewel colours. For non make up days I dye my eyebrows and lashes (I use a dedicated home product, but salons can also do this) about once a month and carry a tinted lip balm.

I would agree with the comments on wearing a brighter colour clothing instead of black which is harsh on most people and/ or a little warming cosmetics. Don't permanently dye your hair or cut bangs unless you want to. It never harms to review your sleep patterns, diet and physical activity levels, with good lifestyle habits you can get an inner glow which people often associate with youth. Eat for nutrition and health don't be on a permanent reduced calorie diet because that often means fewer nutrients. As a lifestyle health professional the only commercial 'diet' than interests me is The Smarter Science of Slim (loads of podcasts on iTunes).

The fine lines we all get in our forties can be plumped out with targeted skincare: I was amazed at the difference when I started respecting my skin's barrier function and working with it to hydrate the skin. I dropped anionic surfactants (foaming cleansers) in favour of a cheap lotion cleanser, tap water and a muslin cloth to rinse. A serum with ingredients scientifically proven to increase ceramides and boost collagen production (KinNiaNag from Skin Essential Actives), alternating with a moisturiser containing medical grade lanolin (supplies specific lipids healthy skin needs) mixed with an aloe vera inner leaf gel (anti inflammatory, collagen boosting) to lighten the texture, dilute lactic acid to exfoliate (also hydrates and increases ceramides) and of course a high SPF cream based on micronised zinc if exposed the sun. Nothing fancy or pricey at all.

[redtuss]

Thank you so, so much for your responses, to all of you. Your comments have helped me not only to identify some things I can change if I choose to, but also to put all this in a bit better perspective. I can't tell you how much better you have all made me feel. Thanks again! :)

That is wonderful, I am very glad!
I agree with the rest of the people here - you need to do what make you feel good!

[Unicorn]

I'm going to sound like an echo, but along with others here, I'd have guest in your 30s. I also agree that defining your eye brows more would lift your face somewhat.

Bare in mind that different people, perceive age differently, some regard everyone past teens as 'old', but have a hazy perception of what age 'old' actually is. It's also easy to take on board one negative comment while dismissing compliments as empty flattery. You certainly don't look older than your age. The shadows under your eyes are what would put you in later 30's, in my eyes, without them I'd be thinking around 30. I have them too, they're really annoying.

Unicorn

[summergreen]

So glad you're feeling better OP :)

[Silver Sister]

You've been blessed with beauty. Silver hair is very stylish on young women, like you, but you could color it and still be quite lovely with your blue eyes.

"Be yourself. Everyone else is already taken." ~Oscar Wilde

[renia22]

So glad you are feeling better! It's really brutal out there; the culture in regards to aging and the comments people make. Sometimes people are kind and uplifting, sometimes they aren't. But I've been wondering about that myself lately, how tricky it can be to decipher between when people are just trying to be helpful, or when they are projecting their own vanity and insecurities about aging onto others, or unrealistically expecting others to be as perfect as they think they are. A good friend of mine who lives in the Hollywood, CA area was just telling me stories the other day of how merciless the culture there is on age and how unrealistic the perceived standards of beauty and perfection are. I can't imagine living there, it's bad enough seeing it on tv and being exposed to it via the media in general. I just dont get it, I think people look so much better without all of that make up and plastic surgery and it disturbs me to see how much worse these "standards" have become with time. It's nice to see that there are movements, though, where younger people are getting back to nature and rebelling against those "ideals". At any rate, I think if you take care of yourself physically and nurture your inner self as well, you can be your personal best at any age! I also think unicorn makes a good point about taking in all comments & not focusing on the negative ones, I'm going to keep that one in mind as well!