I hate my real hair colour (but would love to stop dyeing!)

[BowTie]

When I was a toddler/at a junior school I had a blonde hair which was really lovely. Then it darkened when I was around 12. I hated the colour so I started highlighting my hair when I was 13. I started dying my whole hair probably after 3 years and have tried all kind of colours.
However, now I'd like to stop dying my hair and go more natural. The only thing that is stopping me is my hair colour. It's ash blonde/brown and it looks so greyish! I've seen people who look lovely with their dirty blonde or ash brown hairs but my hair colour is one of the mousiest I've ever seen.

Also, I've heard some people talking how I have grey hair and it really hurts. Any ideas/suggestions what I should do

[HintOfMint]

My former roommate has this same issue. She was a buttery, golden blonde as a child and it started to darken into "dishwater" blonde in her teens and she's been dyeing ever since.

No one's saying that you have to embrace your natural color. I get wanting a more natural lifestyle with fewer chemicals, but if you don't like your hair color, you don't like it and it's your call. It's just a matter of what's more important to you and whether you'll be happy.

However, one thing to consider: your hair color may actually be different from the color it is at your roots. Right now it seems mousy because there's only an inch of it that you've seen since you've started highlighting and dyeing. Your hair color might be lighter and more varied once it's been grown out.

[sarahthegemini]

Try henna? Or honey lightening on your natural colour.

[Messyhair]

I have blonette/blondette hair and it's not the most glamorous to be sure... But I like the no-hassle approach to not having to dye it. I also get bored easily with my colour. And my style. All of this doesn't add up to give me the gorgeous long mane I'd love to have this second. :) I totally understand where you're coming from, and I wonder if honey lightening might do the trick, like sarathegemini suggested...?

[verenikiscoma]

Could it be that you don't like it so much only when you see it growing next to the dyed parts? What I mean is, is it possible that the contrast between dyed parts and natural colour is too strong? If that's the case you could look into dying your hair a colour closer to your natural one, and then you can wait it out, let it grow without having such strong contrast and see. Either way, the important thing is for you to be happy so if you decide your natural hair colour is just not for you then you can definitely look into a more natural approach to changing you colour.

[redtuss]

I have been to understand that the natural sun highlights in any natural haircolour enhances it highly :) And the typ of mousey colour you mean is one of the most versatile of all, it changes with the colours you wear, the lightning and the surroundings. I love it. It is my colour too but I had black hair as a child which then went brownish with "golden strands" in it, there are both cooler and warmer varieties of this colour and they are all equally beautiful.

Please, check out the Blonette Pride-thread http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=80416&highlight=blonette+pride and be inspired by all the beautiful pictures!

[BowTie]

Hi all,
And thank you for your replies, you're always so helpful :)
I think some blonette hair colours look very good, especially if you get some natural highlights in your hair.
I have to google about honey lighting.. sounds interesting and I love honey!

[Magalo]

Keep in mind that honey contain peroxide and that's why it lighten hair, and it is sti damaging (less than bleach though!)

You could also use cassia over your roots. Cassia gives golden tones, it may be all you need to like your color. :) plus it has the same benefits as henna (thicker and stronger strands).

[WilfredAllen]

You could also use cassia over your roots. Cassia gives golden tones, it may be all you need to like your color. :) plus it has the same benefits as henna (thicker and stronger strands).

I was going to suggest cassia as well

[redtuss]

Hi all,
And thank you for your replies, you're always so helpful :)
I think some blonette hair colours look very good, especially if you get some natural highlights in your hair.
I have to google about honey lighting.. sounds interesting and I love honey!

There are great recipes here on this forum as well; here is the big honey thread; http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=148&highlight=honey+lightening

Happy experimenting :)

[Crumpet]

You should do what makes you happy. That being said, if you're interested in going natural, try to grow out your hair and see what your natural really looks like now. As others have said, you will need some length to really see what it looks like. If you commit, you could try to match your bleached ends to your natural a bit to make the process more fluid.

Incidentally, although I support what people want to do with their hair, I usually find that I personally prefer the natural look on people here. I'm usually surprised how much better natural suits skin tones etc. But that's just my opinion. Its best to see for yourself and do what works for you!

[Rio040113]

Another vote here for Cassia :) Also, I think Chamomile tea rinses can add golden tones too.

[redtuss]

Incidentally, although I support what people want to do with their hair, I usually find that I personally prefer the natural look on people here. I'm usually surprised how much better natural suits skin tones etc

This! The highlighted part, I agree so much :D

[PraiseCheeses]

Could it be that you don't like it so much only when you see it growing next to the dyed parts? What I mean is, is it possible that the contrast between dyed parts and natural colour is too strong? If that's the case you could look into dying your hair a colour closer to your natural one, and then you can wait it out, let it grow without having such strong contrast and see. Either way, the important thing is for you to be happy so if you decide your natural hair colour is just not for you then you can definitely look into a more natural approach to changing you colour.

:agree: Natural ash-blonde will look quite dull next to bleached/dyed hair, particularly for the first couple inches of growing out and particularly in dull lighting and when wet. You may appreciate your natural color much more once you see a few inches of it. When I was 16, I grew out quite a bit of Sun-In, and until my roots were a few inches long, I'd hear variations on "Oh, so your hair is like, naturally dark grey already?" from my peers. :steam: I grew out four inches or so of roots so a colorist could accurately match dye to my natural color... and by that time my roots no longer looked grey and were very definitely blonde.

If/when you grow out, remember that exposure to the environment will change your haircolor slightly - that grey half an inch from the scalp may become a lovely beige-blonde tinged with gold after a few months outside your head. You'll need a few good inches of natural color to accurately judge what it looks like, particularly next to bleach and dye. If growing out with a demarcation line isn't your thing, you could soften the dye line with some highlights in natural roots.

Don't feel like you have to grow out virgin hair to have long hair! Have you seen the bottle blonde goes long (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=21256) thread?

[YamaMaya]

Why be ashamed? There's nothing wrong with your color and you can wear it with pride if you want to. It's your head, no one else's, and you shouldn't worry about pleasing others when it comes to your own hair. If you really hate the color and don't want to use chemical dyes, try henna/indigo instead.

[BowTie]

I'm not going to visit the hair salon at least before February so I'm going to grow my hair (and colour) since then and either a)don't dye it or b)dye it so it matches my roots better. I'm kinda curious to see what it will look like.. :)

[Siiri]

My hair colour sounds similar to yours, I dyed it for years and the roots always looked grey against the dye. Now the length looks more golden/neutral toned after some sun exposure. And that's with me wearing a scarf most of the summer to avoid sun damage, it sun bleaches really easily. The lighting makes a difference too, usually indoors it's much darker and more greyish, outside lighter and more golden/reddish. The colour looks especially bad (grey) in elevators for some reason.

[browneyedsusan]

I don't like my "natural" color either! It's ash brown and gray. (It seems all gray--dark and light gray--, but I know my perception doesn't jive with reality.) It used to be strawberry blonde, but all the red and gold went away in my 20's. I henna my roots every month, and that does the trick. It's darker than I'd like, but I can live with it as long as it's red.

Do what you like. It's your head of hair, and you should feel good in it. I'd probably highlight the dickens out of it. I think highlights look so pretty! :)

[AmyBeth]

I never liked my color either. I had an ashy brownette, politely referred to as "mouse brown". How nice. It was neither brown nor blonde. I wanted it to be "special". Or at least different. I started getting highlights and every time I went in for touch ups, it seemed like more and more hair was getting highlighted until I was almost all blonde and I realized that I didn't look good as a blonde and I wanted my old color back. Unfortunately, that was about the time the greys started coming in quick and thick so I tried to just have my whole head colored in an attempt to replicate my natural, young color. And I learned the hard way that you can't really replicate what nature gave you out of a box. I tried and tried and spent so much money. What I'm trying to say is that, haircolor is fun and there's nothing wrong with being happy with your hair. But also realize that you are not on ice. Your hair color will naturally change throughout your life and sooner or later, will fade to grey, and then you can never really have it back. Try thinking about appreciating what you have, rather than the knee jerk reaction that we all have of wanting something different.
That said, I still am not happy with grey and have been using hendigo and I really love what it does for my hair. Cassia could be a real option for you. It does wash out eventually and so if you don't like it, no harm done. It would just pop your color like putting a piece of agate under water. If you are then ready for a next step, you could try a henna gloss. That would warm your hair up without and give it a crazy shine. Test strand first, because henna will not wash out like cassia. These plant dyes are healthy options to boxed dyes.

[Crumpet]

I'm not going to visit the hair salon at least before February so I'm going to grow my hair (and colour) since then and either a)don't dye it or b)dye it so it matches my roots better. I'm kinda curious to see what it will look like.. :)

Sounds like a good idea. Let us know how it goes. If nothing else it it will be a fun experiment. You may wish to check into the growing out dye/bleach thread. They're a supportive bunch from what I've seen and will have good ideas for you!

[faellen]

I had a similar issue - hated my natural colour yet wanted to grow it out, as years of dyeing had taken their toll on my hair's condition, plus I'd just got lazy. I agree with the person that said that the colour at the roots will look different once you've allowed it to grow longer. I really love my ASH (not mousy! Hate that word!) blonette now. As it's growing out, I'm noticing all sorts of tones in there, especially in the sun. This is a colour you can't replicate with a bottle. Embrace the ash, be proud :D

[TheVegan6]

I have strawberry blondette hair color. LUSH has the "Marilyn" thing, which is supposed to highlight your hair. I don't really want to recommend something I haven't used, so you can use that if you want, but I'm not really recommending it. I use ACV to give my hair a redder hue, and hibiscus tea does the same.

[BowTie]

Aww, so many replies :) Thank you all!
Judging by my roots I'd say it kinda looks a bit similar to Jennifer Aniston hair colour that you can see from her roots. I wonder if I should start highlighting my hair again. I did it as a teenager and only would do it in the winter. It's damaging too but I'd probably have to do it less often. I think highlighted about 1-2 times a year and it was in a good condition.

[misspurdy06]

I'm the same way. I had the most success with not coloring when I used color depositing shampoo and conditioner. If you like going blonder..........You see where I'm going with this. As long as it doesn't get too brassy you know? John Frieda Go Blonder. No hair color boxes just washing. Less hassle than bleaching.

http://www.johnfrieda.com/en-US/ProductDetail/Hair-Care/Sheer-Blonde/Go-Blonder-Lightening-Shampoo

Or color depositing.


http://www.sallybeauty.com/Conditioning-Shampoo/SBS-320028,default,pd.html?cm_vc=SEARCH

[maborosi]

Try cassia. I have light blonde hair naturally and cassia gives my roots a very golden, warm color.

It's not permanent as henna, but it conditions well and won't damage your hair like conventional dyes.

Additionally, if you want to, you can conventionally dye, but I would recommend slathering your hair in coconut oil beforehand. I did this before doing two volume 40 bleach treatments a couple of years back and if I had not done it, my hair would have been ruined for sure. It really does protect the hair very well, and does not affect the dyeing process.

~maborosi~

[Springlets]

Just sharing my experience, if it helps. This is how my roots looked 2.5 years ago when I started growing out.

http://i809.photobucket.com/albums/zz17/Blaircorneliabass/user37452_pic106396_1309227773.jpg

I have almost no dye left; my avatar and signature pictures show my natural color all grown out. After 1.5-2 years of growing out, hair will always be much lighter and warm-toned than when it started.

[noludoru]

No one's saying that you have to embrace your natural color. I get wanting a more natural lifestyle with fewer chemicals, but if you don't like your hair color, you don't like it and it's your call. It's just a matter of what's more important to you and whether you'll be happy.

Best. Post. Ever. Do what you want to be happy.

As to the actual color. . . am I the only one here that LOVES "dishwater blonde?" Nearly half of my Hair Inspiration Pinboard is dirty blonde. More of it would be if I could FIND good pictures of it, but all the natural blondes seem to highlight. http://www.pinterest.com/noludoru/hair-ideas/

It's such a beautiful color, and flattering on everyone.

[BowTie]

Thank you all! Today I actually liked my roots. It gives my hair more interesting look, especially on updos.
I really want to see my real hair colour and maybe I will start liking it :)

[Crumpet]

Best. Post. Ever. Do what you want to be happy.

As to the actual color. . . am I the only one here that LOVES "dishwater blonde?" Nearly half of my Hair Inspiration Pinboard is dirty blonde. More of it would be if I could FIND good pictures of it, but all the natural blondes seem to highlight. http://www.pinterest.com/noludoru/hair-ideas/

It's such a beautiful color, and flattering on everyone.

I'm glad you shared these!

[Firefox7275]

My hair is mousey too and a very grey version, it's not got brown tones or blonde tones whatsoever as there is in many of those Pinterest images. I have long since come to terms with the fact I will dye until I go close to completely white but I presently work to minimise the damage. Both coconut oil and hydrolysed protein can be used before and after to reduce damage and to strengthen/ reduce porosity/ increase elasticity afterwards. Other proven ingredients for damaged hair include ceramides, 18-MEA and panthenol. Lastly the fewer shades you lift the less damaging the process is, ditto not going over previously dyed hair - roots only.

[ladyfey]

I bleached my hair for years and then dyed red for years. I was also white blonde as a child and darkened later. As someone already pointed out, the roots look far worse than they are. I thought mine were ashy dishwater. Grew out my natural color, thinking I would hate it, but was done with dying it, it turns out that it is a lovely color! I just couldn't see it when looking at just the roots. SO I say, grow out the natural 'til at least chin length and then see how you feel about it.

[bananahanna]

Could it be that you don't like it so much only when you see it growing next to the dyed parts? What I mean is, is it possible that the contrast between dyed parts and natural colour is too strong? If that's the case you could look into dying your hair a colour closer to your natural one, and then you can wait it out, let it grow without having such strong contrast and see. Either way, the important thing is for you to be happy so if you decide your natural hair colour is just not for you then you can definitely look into a more natural approach to changing you colour.

this is exactly what I am thinking. I have a quite similar color & i always thought it looked ugly and grey next to my roots until it became the more prominent color. Plus nothing suits you like your natural color. It could be pretty once the sun lightens it as well. keep that in mind.

[cranberrymoonz]

It will probably look different when it's longer because then it won't be cntrasted with the lighter and warmer parts of your hair. Look into seasonal colour types, it'll make you realise that your own hair colour suits you the best. Wearing the right colours can make a big difference in complementing you natural beauty, too. If you still find it to look grey, you can try cassia to warm it up a bit.

[noludoru]

I'm glad you shared these!

Aww, you're welcome!