Getting Started

[Granger Mane]

Hello LH Community, Im Granger Mane, and this is my first post after lurking for several weeks. I figured this was a good place to look for advice on growing long healthy hair. My hair is currently shoulder-length (AP if stretched or wet - should be there naturally by Dec). After several butchers from hairdressers in high school, I grew out my hair from collar bone to waist, which I maintained for several years. However, I did not know the proper ways to maintain it. Ive never dyed it, rarely straightened (usually forced to by family and friends for special events - I don't anymore. Never liked it even before I knew how damaging it was), But I always left it loose, and detangled from the top, and wore metal elastics. My hair is wavy and prone to knots and matts, esp around the neck. Frustrated by thinning and matenience, I had it cut summer 2012 to chin, shortest Ive ever had it. I kept it like that for a few months, before deciding to grow it out again. It will be a year next month since I cut it, and I hope to get back to waist in the next 18-24 months. But Im determined to take better care of it, but do not get the best advice or support from family or friends. They say the usual, cut, straighten, brush when wet. I guess Im just confused on how to get started, esp in reguards to products, detangling, and matienece. Any advice would be welcome, Ill post more later when Im at a better computer (sorry for the block of text - this comp is very tricky). Thanks in advance!

[Leeloo]

Hello and welcome! There is plenty of great information around here to steer you in the right direction. The first thing I’d recommend is getting a sleep cap or silk pillow cases (polyester satin ones might be too hot) and pure coconut oil. Coconut oil is great on dry hair the night before wash day as a deep treatment. Happy growing!

[Madora]

Generally speaking:

Eat a balanced diet and drink plenty of water
Detangle your hair with a wide tooth comb, and start at the bottom of the strand and slowly work up until you reach the scalp. If you do it in small segments, it will be gentler on your hair. Just don't start at the scalp and pull the comb downward. That is asking for trouble
When your hair becomes longer, confine it at night to prevent tangles (either loosely braid it, or put it in a satin sleep cap).
Keep it combed every day to remove loose hair.
Daily brushing with a bbb helps promote a healthy scalp and removes dead cells, etc.

Find a good shampoo and conditioner (not a combination product). Try diluting the shampoo a little to help prevent buildup.

Only shampoo when your hair needs it. Overshampooing removes essential oils and dries out your scalp.

Avoid heat at all costs. Air drying is the best for your hair. If you can't dry outdoors, then try standing in front a small portable electric heater (not too close!) and dry your hair with an absorbent towel. (Some folks prefer to dry with a t-shirt).

When shampooing, use only your finger pads, not your nails. Do not "moosh" your hair around your head like a mop. Try and keep each side separate and work in small, circular motions. After conditioning, rinse with a cold water rinse (if you can stand it. The cold water is more effective in removing the soap or conditioner residue).

Gently squeeze out the excess water with your palms (do not wring it out!)

Detangle gently with a wide tooth comb as soon as possible. Do not wait for the hair to dry before tackling tangles.

As your hair lengthens, learn how to do updos and braids. The more you wear your hair up, the more you protect it (provided that you refrain from pulling/twisting it tightly).

If you feel more comfortable wearing your hair down, then try and detangle it every few hours. In this way, you avoid garnering more and more snarls thru the day...which leaves a lot of detangling to do at night.

Many members swear by nylon or silk pillow cases to help protect delicate ends.

S and D (search and destroy) those split ends at least once a month.

Don't become frustrated by slow growth. Hair grows slowly (6 inches a year for many of us).

And remember, you don't need a treasure trove of hair stuff to grow beautiful hair. It all boils down to your diet, your genes, and how you care for it (how gently you treat it).

Wishing you all the best for a beautiful, healthy mane!

[jacqueline101]

I want to say welcome and that you're in the right place for help. You might want to invest in afew starter things. Sleep cap made of satin, satin pillow case, and coconut oil. You might need a bbb and a wide tooth comb if not try a tangle teaser. You will need spin pins, elastics, scrunchies and a deep conditioner and maybe a cholesterol treatment for protein if your current shampoo doesn't have them. Then you will need scissors for hair cutting and sectioning clips for your s&d. You might want to try Monistat if you do you might need a pointy tip dye bottle. There are different applications for it you might want to try water and deluted Monistat. There are others who add oils to Monistat I've never done that. I've done straight from the tube and water deluted. Straight Monistat can cause headaches for some. I've never had that issue but I thought I'd mention it.

[Granger Mane]

Thanks so much for the advice Madera and Leeloo. Really appreciate it.

It's been fascinating researching on this site and others, as well as confusing, since there's so much advice and many techniques.

I've started stretching my washes (don't have sulfur free shampoo or conditioner yet - what brands or recommends work well for curly, knotty hair?). No hairsticks yet (have tried with pencils, still need to practise), but did buy spin pins this week and am really enjoying them wh n I can get them to stay screwed in lol. My main problem is tangles, esp little "dreadlocks" at my neck that take hours to undo by hand. Any advice on that?

On the silk pillows, would putting a piece of silk clothing over a regular pillow work or do I need a proper cover or cap?

Also confused on coconut oil - I've tried olive oil before which left my hair sticky and greasy for days after multiple tries to wash it out. How do I avoid the same with coconut?

Again, thanks so much. I'm sure I'll have more questions later. I'm sure I will after so much horrible hair advice over the years :)

[Naiadryade]

First off, what works for some doesn't work for others. Pay attention to your hair as you try new things. Do one thing at a time, and watch how your hair reacts to each new thing. If it's good, keep doing that. If not, don't.

For example, Madora suggests detangling when wet. If I did that, my hair would break so much it would never get any longer, and I'd get super frustrated every time as well. If I wait until my hair is dry before attempting to detangle, it's pretty easy and I get minimal breakages so long as I'm gentle. Some people's experience is the opposite! An LHC motto is YMMV - Your Mileage May Vary!

Most curlies and many wavies don't use boar bristle brushes, as they beak up the curl pattern and can cause a big poofy frizz ball. Use caution there.

Try different oils to see what works best for your hair. It sounds like you may have used too much oil if it left your hair greasy and sticky for days. Unless you're doing a deep treatment, use very little oil. I use about 4 drops at a time on my medium-thick, 29" hair. You probably only need a couple of drops, or with coconut oil, a small fingernail-scraping. Spread this across both hands so there is just a light sheen of oil on your hands. Lean forward and gently, lightly rub your hands over your ends and/or length, generally not above the ears, to apply the oil to your hair. This shouldn't leave your hair oily-looking, just a tiny bit shiner and easier to manage.

Which brings me to my main recommendation for helping with tangles: oil! For me, a small amount of olive oil does wonders to prevent tangles and to provide enough slip to detangle them without breakage.

[Crumpet]

My absolute best recommendation: sleep cap!

I didn't think I needed one because I had silk and satin pillow cases. Nope. The sleep cap is better. Somehow my hair ends up looking like I got an expensive blow dry. How it does it, I don't know. It just keeps doing it and I love it for it!

[sweetinlace]

I was once told that the first thing for newbies to try is CWC (condition wash condition). It was suggested first because it is easy, and you don't have to buy anything. There are a couple of ways to do this, the simplest being to condition all of your hair and shampoo the scalp without rinsing the conditioner out first. Then after everything is rinsed out, condition again and rinse as normal. The conditioner will protect the length from the harsh chemicals in the shampoo so it won't dry out your hair as much.

As for detangling, I do mine preshower with oil in my hair and then again in the shower with a ton of conditioner. For both, first I finger comb and then I use my tangle teezer. The only reason I do it preshower is so I don't have to deal with as much loose hair in the shower. Then I use a little leave-in for definition and a little oil.

And I definitely agree that you should wear your hair up as often as possible to protect the ends and to keep it from knotting up as much.

[biogirl87]

GrangerMane, you have gotten good advice already. I just want to clarify that when Madora mentions detangling your hair when it's wet, it generally means when there is a lot of conditioner in your hair. You could try this for a few washes and see if this works for you (it didn't for me - I had more hairs coming out in the shower when I did this - and my hair is also quite wavy and prone to knots and tangles). Also, with the wide-tooth comb you want to get one that is wide-tooth and has smooth teeth. Try looking at Sally's (if there is a Sally's where you live) as it doesn't have to be expensive or seamless as long as the teeth are smooth. In fact, my hair did not like the seamless comb when I tried it and does much better with the comb from Sally's with smooth teeth (although there are small seams on the teeth, I can barely feel them with my fingers and do not usually feel the seams when I comb my hair).

A sleep cap is really good for your hair when it gets past shoulder/collarbone length. I would recommend that you get a sleep cap that has drawstrings in it instead of elastics as then you can adjust how tightly you put it on and theoretically it would last longer since there would be no elastic to worry about. As Madora said, you don't need a lot of stuff to grow out your hair long. I do not think Monistat would be necessary for you at this point. Start out with good shampoo and conditioner (doesn't matter if the conditioner has silicones in it or not if it works for your hair), satin or silk sleep cap (satin is usually cheaper though and you can find it in the Ethnic hair care section of Walmart), a wide-tooth comb, and maybe try coconut oil (I have only tried coconut oil once when I overoiled my hair and have not tried it since then and I think my hair is doing fine, your hairs may need to be oiled before you wash it).

See how your hair reacts to this routine and when you experiment, try each change for a couple of weeks and only change one thing at a time.

[Firefox7275]

Welcome! Research the Curly Girl method and throw your hairbrush in the trash.

[Aingeal]

Welcome! You've already gotten some great advice, so I just wanted to say happy growing!

[BlazingHeart]

When it comes to products and ways of washing your hair, change ONE thing at a time. That way, you can tell what works and what doesn't. If you change your wash method and your shampoo and your conditioner all at the same time, you don't know which change was the 'good' one or the 'bad' one.

Also, don't pile your hair on top of your head to wash it. Use your fingers to scrub your scalp, and then work your shampoo or conditioner down - don't ball your hair up. Wadding your hair up can encourage tangles and breakage, especially in people who are already prone to them. That one thing seems to make a big difference for a lot of people!

[jeanniet]

Madora didn't recommend detangling when wet--she's always recommended dry detangling. However, if your hair is on the curly side, I highly recommend you look into curly girl (CG), part of which involves detangling only when hair is soaking wet and slathered with conditioner (usually in the shower). I used to dry detangle, and I was constantly detangling because my hair started tangling again as soon as I was done detangling, but now I do CG, only detangle in the shower every 3 days or so, and...I have no tangles. It literally takes seconds to run a comb through my hair in the shower. When you allow your waves/curls to clump together instead of constantly breaking them up, tangling is reduced.

Definitely recommend a silk sleep cap as well. Skip the brush--at most you need a wide-toothed comb. A good conditioner, sulfate-free shampoo, and maybe an oil. That's all you need to start with.

[biogirl87]

Welcome! Research the Curly Girl method and throw your hairbrush in the trash.Firefox, I don't know if this is how you were intending to come off as or if this is how Granger Mane would feel you came off, but sometimes telling someone to throw their hairbrush in the trash is being a bit rude. Just because the curly girl method works really well for you, doesn't mean it will work for all curlies and wavies. Some wavies may need to actually brush their hair with a brush from time to time, especially if they're at a lower end of 2. Some wavy hair I think prefers to be treated like it is straight hair (I know my 2b hair likes to be treated like type 1 hair and it will begin to form knots if I put off detangling for more than 12 hours and will mat up on me if I don't run my fingers through it or detangle for 3 days).

Granger Mane, depending on how wavy your hair is, you may be able to get away with brushing your hair. If you do decide to brush your hair from time to time, do it gently and detangle your hair first before brushing.


When you allow your waves/curls to clump together instead of constantly breaking them up, tangling is reduced.jeanniet, I know this has been your experience, but some of us wavies don't experience this. I personally find my tangles more when I let the waves clump together and Granger Mane's hair may be the same way.

[oatmealpie]

I second BlazingHeart's recommendation: try one thing at a time. When you first start out here it can be overwhelming, and you'll probably get really excited and want to go out and buy everything. That's not the best idea for your bank account, and it might not be the best for your hair.

Check out Ursula's standard newbie advice (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=113773), which expands on this idea and gives you concrete steps to follow.

[jeanniet]

Firefox, I don't know if this is how you were intending to come off as or if this is how Granger Mane would feel you came off, but sometimes telling someone to throw their hairbrush in the trash is being a bit rude. Just because the curly girl method works really well for you, doesn't mean it will work for all curlies and wavies. Some wavies may need to actually brush their hair with a brush from time to time, especially if they're at a lower end of 2. Some wavy hair I think prefers to be treated like it is straight hair (I know my 2b hair likes to be treated like type 1 hair and it will begin to form knots if I put off detangling for more than 12 hours and will mat up on me if I don't run my fingers through it or detangle for 3 days).

Granger Mane, depending on how wavy your hair is, you may be able to get away with brushing your hair. If you do decide to brush your hair from time to time, do it gently and detangle your hair first before brushing.

jeanniet, I know this has been your experience, but some of us wavies don't experience this. I personally find my tangles more when I let the waves clump together and Granger Mane's hair may be the same way.

Everything anyone on this thread has recommended is based on personal experience; no different with what I recommended, based on the OP's statement that she has curly hair. There's no need to refute what other people have said, since she will have to work out what's best for her hair anyway. People are merely giving her ideas to work from.

[Granger Mane]

Wow, thanks so much everyone! So much awesome information. Totally get that everyone's different and will get different results from different things. I wasn't offended by the brush comment, though my hair does better with just a comb; maybe if needed down the road I'll invest in a bbb.

So I've bought coconut oil and sulfate-free shampoo. For coconut oil, should I put it in before or after a wash, and just the length or the scalp as well? If before, should it be in for a hour or overnight?

I'm loving the spin pins, but have trouble getting the second screwed in. I've been watching Youtube tutuorials for help, but I guess I need to still practise.

[AmyBeth]

Hi, Granger. I use the coconut oil pretty heavily the night before my weekly shampoo and let it soak in overnight, then wash it out in the morning. I usually use a few drops of oil (I like avocado because it's so light) in a teaspoon or so of Aloe Vera gel for a leave in.
As far as brushes go, I hardly ever use one, not because of curly, frizzy hair, but because mine is so fine and fragile that even a tiny baby brush pulls too much out! So you see, everyone has their own hair and their own "best" way to take care of it. I've gotten so much advice here and my hair has improved a lot, but some of the advice is not applicable to my hair- or to yours. It will take a while to sift through all the info and find what works for you and then you will be delighted at how your hair improves- promise!

[BlazingHeart]

There are several different ways to oil, so you will have to try them out to see what works for you. Some people put in a lot of oil before they wash their hair, let the oil sit for anywhere between an hour and a day, and then wash and condition as usual. Some people put a very small amount (just a few drops or a thin scraping of solid oils like coconut) right after they wash, while their hair is still damp. Some put that same small amount on dry hair.

I think most people do not oil their scalps unless they are using something like castor oil that is supposed to affect hair growth.

[Firefox7275]

Firefox, I don't know if this is how you were intending to come off as or if this is how Granger Mane would feel you came off, but sometimes telling someone to throw their hairbrush in the trash is being a bit rude. Just because the curly girl method works really well for you, doesn't mean it will work for all curlies and wavies. Some wavies may need to actually brush their hair with a brush from time to time, especially if they're at a lower end of 2. Some wavy hair I think prefers to be treated like it is straight hair (I know my 2b hair likes to be treated like type 1 hair and it will begin to form knots if I put off detangling for more than 12 hours and will mat up on me if I don't run my fingers through it or detangle for 3 days).

Granger Mane, depending on how wavy your hair is, you may be able to get away with brushing your hair. If you do decide to brush your hair from time to time, do it gently and detangle your hair first before brushing.


That was my 'advice' as requested by the OP and is based not only on my experience but also being active on the Wavy Hair Community on Facebook and Naturallycurly/ British Curlies forums, she can and no doubt will choose what she takes from this thread since there is the usual conflicting opinions. My statement was brief and blunt since I was on my mobile phone but my wording was in no way rude, I even took the time to welcome the OP. Running your fingers through or detangling real knots is not the same as brushing.

[Granger Mane]

So I started using the coconut oil and sulfate free shampoo. I soaked the oil down my length overnight, and rinsed it out with shampoo and conditioner the morning after. I've done this twice this week (I usually wash my hair 2-3 times a week, more or it dries out), and am really enjoying the results. My hair's softer and sleeker, and I've been using the spin pins a lot, which gives me nice curls when I unscrew them.

About night caps, what are good ones at good prices? A silk or satin one with drawstrings? Haven't been able to find one I like for a good price on Ebay or Etsy. What about Amazon?

Thanks so much again guys! So far so good!

[sarahthegemini]

http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B005KTYP9S/ref=oh_details_o06_s00_i00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

That's the sleep cap I have.

[nakima]

welcome! and what Madora said :)