Destined to grow long hair and never be able to wear it down?

[Komao]

Hi, I usually wear my hair up or in some type of braid for protection as it's getting longer. I wore it down and now that it's mid back length I came home and it was tangled underneath and took a lot of time to get snarls out. It was sunny out so on length of hair I put a small amount of coconut oil as I read that might help protect your hair? I think when down I have to comb it more often? As I remember, when it was once quite long, I wore it down often but always had a wide tooth comb on me and I believe I frequently combed it. It's been awhile and I might be loosing my mind :crazyq:


My hair is fine and abundant, with wave. When I wash it, CO, I have no problem with snarls. I oil it, I put it in buns or braids, take down end of night , no tangles. I Use herbal rinses or ACV.


I love up-dos and braids and thanks to this LHC have learned quite a few more styles.


However, when I have something special going on and want to wear it down, does anyone have any suggestions how I can avoid a tangled mess. I hope so as it's so disappointing working my way to waist length and thinking I can never wear it down?
I take good care of it, I think. I wash once a week. I massage. I use coconut oil or sometimes olive oil. Jojoba oil at times.
Try to keep it nice and moisturized. Trim when it needs it. Wear a hat or scarf to protect it when in sun or elements for long periods of time. PLEASE HELP, if you've experienced the same mess and have found anything that can help.

I would post a picture but right now I'm on a device that I can't seem to copy and paste the BB code with?
I can do it when I get on my laptop or you're welcome to visit my profile and I have a hair journal with a few pics in my album.

Thanks so much and I think the only damaging thing I'm doing currently, even though I take time trying to get snarls out with conditioner and wide tooth comb is the unavoidable tear, which makes me want to shriek. :wail:

This picture is from last January, http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=5588&d=1375026621

and this too, me celebrating my growth. Hope you can get a good idea of hair type from these pics, http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=5589&d=1375026645

[woodswanderer]

I am at hip and I wear mine down most of the time when indoors. I do have to brush it about 4-5 times from morning to night. I rarely wear my hair down outside though, especially if it is windy. I do use a leave-in moisturizer, and that really helps with tangles. When I am being super active, I usually braid it, and otherwise just put it in a bun with hair sticks when I am outside. If I am in a situation where it isn't convenient to brush my hair, I just put it up regardless.

[kiezel]

I haven't had this probllem before, but I was thinking....

You said only the bottom snarls and tangles? Perhaps this has something to do with the fabric that's in contact with your hair?

Another thought I'm not sure would be feasible is to make tiny braids of your innermost layer of hair, the stuff that rubs against your shirt, again assuming that's the reason.

I hope this helps!

[Komao]

I am at hip and I wear mine down most of the time when indoors. I do have to brush it about 4-5 times from morning to night. I rarely wear my hair down outside though, especially if it is windy. I do use a leave-in moisturizer, and that really helps with tangles. When I am being super active, I usually braid it, and otherwise just put it in a bun with hair sticks when I am outside. If I am in a situation where it isn't convenient to brush my hair, I just put it up regardless.

I did forget to mention that I use a boar bristle brush but I don't brush it as much as you do. Perhaps that is a problem. In fact, I usually have it up and brush only once a day, in the evening. I comb to put it in up-do. I will try brushing it more, when just at home and see how that goes. Thanks:)

[jacqueline101]

I wear my down and I get a few tangles I try not to mess with it. I found cones to help with tangles.

[Komao]

I haven't had this probllem before, but I was thinking....

You said only the bottom snarls and tangles? Perhaps this has something to do with the fabric that's in contact with your hair?

Another thought I'm not sure would be feasible is to make tiny braids of your innermost layer of hair, the stuff that rubs against your shirt, again assuming that's the reason.

I hope this helps!

Hi Kiezel, I have heard about this before but not sure if it applies to me as it seems to happen with whatever I'm wearing.
In case I'm mistaken I will try your other suggestion. Thank you.:)

[Komao]

Thanks Jacqueline101. Maybe cones will help:)

[melusine963]

I'm also unable to wear my hair down without getting horrible tangles. My only advice for detangling would be to use your fingers and conditioner, rather than a comb. I find it's a much easier way to gently unravel the tangles without tearing.

[luxepiggy]

Having spent years wearing my hip+ length hair down every day, I strongly recommend against brushing more frequently. In fact I recommend that you comb less too, and instead gently fingercomb your hair when daytime detangling is needed.

Also, as jacqueline101 wisely suggested, many of us find 'cones to be very helpful for tangle minimization! Perhaps you can get a 'coney serum or leave-in to use on the days you want to leave your hair loose. Aquage Beyond Shine works wonders for me - it really decreases the incidence of tangles in my hair, and it's light enough that it doesn't weigh down the hair or make it look greasy (^(oo)^)v

[young&reckless]

It is all about the leave ins for me. If I know I'm going to wear my hair down I make sure I oil the underside and not just my ends.

[ravenreed]

My hair is naturally tangle-prone. When I wear it down, I brush several times a day to keep matted horrors from forming. Finger combing or using a comb doesn't do it for me because part of the process is to smooth the hairs out temporarily. I find a TT is best for this. I try to wear a slippery shirt on the days I wear it down, and nothing with a collar. I also find that catnip rinses have helped somewhat, although short of coating my hair in teflon, there isn't a serious fix to my problem. Sometimes wearing my hair in a high pony helps me feel the thrill of my hair out and about while avoiding the worst tangle spot, the shoulder to bra strap area. If the tangles are really bad when I get home, I coat my hair in a slippy conditioner and carefully detangle in the shower.

[meteor]

Some great advice was posted on this thread. I really agree with advice on brushing hair less and even combing it less.

I have been battling tangles my whole life. My hair is VERY similar in texture and waviness to yours, and I really get good results from not brushing, since brushing breaks up the natural wave pattern and can cause more new tangles. My hair is hip+ length now and if I didn't wear it up every day, I'd probably be way more frustrated with detangling.
One thing that really exacerbates the issue is having roughed up cuticle. So try to avoid all heat styling, chemical treatments. My hair has bleached highlights, which really makes tangles worse.

On days I wear hair down, I like to do half-ups instead of completely down, and it helps dramatically. You can also show off hair in braids and pony tails while keeping it contained and somewhat protected.

Product-wise, I notice that the less leave-ins I use, the better slip I get. I do like super-coney light liquids (e.g. MoroccanOil Argan Oil).

Light oilings sometimes help but sometimes make matters worse - I think you need a tiny amount and spread it really uniformly.

Also, have you tried Curly Girl method? It might help. It prescribes combing with a wide-tooth comb or fingers only when your hair is wet and covered in conditioner after a wash, and then not combing or brushing it until next wash.

[faellen]

I agree that cones and leave-ins really help to reduce tangles, but sometimes you'll just get them anyway. On days when I wear my hair down, I keep my tangle teezer handy as I really dislike finger combing.
There's no way I'd give up wearing it down though, I personally don't see the point in long hair if it's up all the time!

[spidermom]

Oil makes my hair tangle more, not less.

It helps to wear a very smooth fabric that your hair can just swish across. Coney serum helps, too.

When I wear my hair down, I leave it alone (not frequently comb or brush). Then I allow extra time and a bit of coney serum (or detangle spray) if needed to detangle. I'm also prone to back of neck knots, which I have to very slowly and carefully comb out. Finger combing is a disaster because hair seems to cling to my fingers but not to my wooden comb.

[Komao]

Having spent years wearing my hip+ length hair down every day, I strongly recommend against brushing more frequently. In fact I recommend that you comb less too, and instead gently fingercomb your hair when daytime detangling is needed.

Also, as jacqueline101 wisely suggested, many of us find 'cones to be very helpful for tangle minimization! Perhaps you can get a 'coney serum or leave-in to use on the days you want to leave your hair loose. Aquage Beyond Shine works wonders for me - it really decreases the incidence of tangles in my hair, and it's light enough that it doesn't weigh down the hair or make it look greasy (^(oo)^)v

Thank you so much and for giving me the name of product that helps you. Your hair is beautiful:)

[Komao]

I agree that cones and leave-ins really help to reduce tangles, but sometimes you'll just get them anyway. On days when I wear my hair down, I keep my tangle teezer handy as I really dislike finger combing.
There's no way I'd give up wearing it down though, I personally don't see the point in long hair if it's up all the time!
Thanks for your help, too. I wondered about the tangle teezer, good to know it helps you. Any cones and or leave-ins you would suggest?
I agree wholeheartedly that I want that option to wear down when I choose. Thanks:)

[Komao]

Spidermom, maybe I should not oil when wearing hair down. I have so many new things to try.

I have no problem with oiling with hair up or in braid, how about you? I take it down or out of braid and it's real smooth to comb through.
I normally leave it alone as well, no extra brushing or combing when wearing down until I get home.
Just have to experiment. I think one of the first things to incorporate is the cones. Thanks and wish me luck. Dying to wear hair down without all the hassle:flower:

[Komao]

Thank you meteor. Yes this is certainly the best place to come, LHC, with all the lovely, helpful members. I love being a member and that I can keep referring to this thread and many others to digest everything said and hopefully be experimenting with all the advice, I will finally find out what will assist me in my particular hair problems.
I have not tried Curly Girl Method. I have certainly seen it mentioned but have been so busy trying to learn so many different things, I haven't pursued that avenue, yet. Thanks to you, I'm making that a priority:)

[Komao]

I'm also unable to wear my hair down without getting horrible tangles. My only advice for detangling would be to use your fingers and conditioner, rather than a comb. I find it's a much easier way to gently unravel the tangles without tearing.

Thanks, I think I started detangling with wide tooth comb and then went to fingers. I do agree it was much better for me. I'm hoping with all the suggestions here something will work to avoid the dreaded tangles, in the first place, for you and me. If I find something that prevents them or minimizes tangles after experimenting, I sure will let you know, too. :)

[Komao]

Hi young&reckless, I must have a much more severe problem than you. I oiled all the length, underside, ends, total length of hair and it was not a pretty scene when I got home. I made sure it was evenly distributed and was really trying to prepare it so I could avoid disaster. Maybe I need to make sure that my clothing is not the culprit, as others have suggested. Wish me luck on finding my remedy. :)

[Komao]

ravenweed, thanks for your advice. I will try a slippery shirt. Another member suggested the TT as well. I have never tried the catnip rinse but I grow it and if you've ever grown it, you know how prolific that is, so if it helps me, I've got plenty. The high pony has helped me as well. Now that it is longer, maybe it will feel more thrilling to me. Thanks for your advice. I'm grateful:o

[Komao]

I just want you all to know how much I appreciate all of your help. Since everyone's hair is different and I've received so much advice:), I think I'll take some of the common denominators and start with those first and see if I can't solve what seems to be for me, my most major problem. Like I said, I try to take decent care of my hair but when I have to detangle a mess, I feel defeated and that then I have damaged the hair that I was trying to treat well.
I will be sure to post what helps me and I'm hoping I can solve this dilemma. I just really want to enjoy my long hair and take the best care of it, that I can. Many thanks for your time in helping me:)

[Kat]

I gave up on wearing mine down a long time ago, to be honest with you. It tends to be tangly (it can tangle when I'm just sitting still; I used to think it was something I was doing wrong until my mom told me that's why she wanted me to cut my hair short when I was a kid-- it was always really tangly and unmanageable), and even though it's on the thick side, it doesn't LOOK that way when down, so it doesn't look like a pretty curtain like some people have (and like yours does), it just looks like a stringy mess (it only has some body when it has braid waves, but then it looks frizzy because I have to brush it to eliminate the stringiness).

I think some hair is just tangly like nature; I can baby mine and still get tangles. I know other people who could ride in a convertible on the freeway with their hair loose, step out of the car, and have it fall looking halfway decent. I'm jealous. :)


I find that my tanglies are helped a bit by an herbal hair rinse. In mine I tend to use some mixture of lavender, rosemary, horsetail, juniper berries, marigold, chamomile, senna leaf, hibiscus, green and/or black tea, and probably some other stuff I'm not thinking of. I let it steep in hot or boiling water for a good while, let it cool and strain, then pour it over my hair after I've washed and conditioned and rinsed (and then usually I'll let it sit for a bit, then refill the pitcher with clean water and pour that over once or twice, just in case the herbs might stain anything my hair drips on). It honestly controls the tangles surprisingly well, although I haven't tried it with leaving my hair down.

[faellen]

Thanks for your help, too. I wondered about the tangle teezer, good to know it helps you. Any cones and or leave-ins you would suggest?
I agree wholeheartedly that I want that option to wear down when I choose. Thanks:)

For a coney serum, I use Avon Moroccan Argan Oil leave-in treatment. And I like got2b Smooth Operator leave-in conditioner too :)

[Komao]

Thanks Kat, I have tried the rosemary and sage rinse and I love that. It makes my hair incredibly shiny and soft.
I ran low on rosemary this year and was just using sage, that's nice too. I just did this past week a lavender rinse. My hair smelled real good. I have a herb garden, every year and I love herbs for all kinds of uses but tend to use them more for culinary or aromatic purposes. I haven't used chamomile in along time. I use to use that as a natural lightener. I have never used marigolds or the others you mentioned on hair. I have read about the green and black tea but have not used them yet. Thanks for all the suggestions. Excited to try more. The only downfall, they make my hair feel great but I haven't run across any yet that have helped with tangles. I seem to get them whenever outside. I can be inside with hair down all day and never get a tangle. I'm jealous too. I feel it's like a curse sometimes. I love long hair but when you have to battle with tangles, it's unpleasant and a lot of work. I'd much rather work on my hair in many other ways!

[Komao]

Thanks faellen, for the product information. :)

[RitaCeleste]

I oil mine with meadowfoam seed oil or coconut oil. I've used spray on products but not lately. My car has no AC so I have the window down when I'm driving. Occasionally I will get a bad knot and loose a little hair if its impossible to get out otherwise. If my hair had to be worn up a lot, I'd cut it back to a length I could wear down. I love putting it into a figure 8 bun and would probably enjoy learning some other buns, but often it pulls when its up and makes my head hurt when I take it down. Its in-between waist and BCL. My hemline may not as thick as it could be from wearing it down all the time but I'm good with that. The oil makes it tangle lots less and I pull it over my shoulders and lightly oil everything to the top of the neck and then lightly oil the top by brushing my hands over it. But like someone else was saying, I do the underside, ends, + fan out the length and hit all with a little oil that will soak in a bit and not look oily later on. I usually use a conditioner with cones like a Pantene conditioner for natural African American hair as it really does seem to help tangles and making it softer. I don't rinse till its bare again but I don't need a leave in either. You have loads of gorgeous hair, don't panic if you loose a tiny bit of hair to the occasional snarl. Keep it conditioned and use oil or something (Detangler whatever works for you) to reduce tangles.) Whatever your haircare routine is it should be something you can live with. Yes there may be a more perfect head of hair somewhere and they may have done xyz to get it. But if that's not something you want to do, you can do as you please and be happy with the results you get anyway.

[Leeloo]

Maybe wearing a silk scarf to cover up your shoulders when you wear your hair down will help, or wearing a silk top. Or maybe you can wear it down on your wash day and get the tangles out finger combing it when you put conditioner in and are rinsing it out. The water running down your hair that is covered in conditioner should make it pretty easy.

[Komao]

I oil mine with meadowfoam seed oil or coconut oil. I've used spray on products but not lately. My car has no AC so I have the window down when I'm driving. Occasionally I will get a bad knot and loose a little hair if its impossible to get out otherwise. If my hair had to be worn up a lot, I'd cut it back to a length I could wear down. I love putting it into a figure 8 bun and would probably enjoy learning some other buns, but often it pulls when its up and makes my head hurt when I take it down. Its in-between waist and BCL. My hemline may not as thick as it could be from wearing it down all the time but I'm good with that. The oil makes it tangle lots less and I pull it over my shoulders and lightly oil everything to the top of the neck and then lightly oil the top by brushing my hands over it. But like someone else was saying, I do the underside, ends, + fan out the length and hit all with a little oil that will soak in a bit and not look oily later on. I usually use a conditioner with cones like a Pantene conditioner for natural African American hair as it really does seem to help tangles and making it softer. I don't rinse till its bare again but I don't need a leave in either. You have loads of gorgeous hair, don't panic if you loose a tiny bit of hair to the occasional snarl. Keep it conditioned and use oil or something (Detangler whatever works for you) to reduce tangles.) Whatever your haircare routine is it should be something you can live with. Yes there may be a more perfect head of hair somewhere and they may have done xyz to get it. But if that's not something you want to do, you can do as you please and be happy with the results you get anyway.

Thanks for posting your thoughts and thanks for compliment:) I live in the northeast and I really have no hair tangle problems at all except for summer. Of course, that is when I would like to wear it down. In the winter, I have to protect it either wearing up or braided. It might be the humidity that is not my friend, although if humid, I can't stand my hair down. Way to hot for me!
I will continue conditioning and I love coconut oil as well. I will make sure to distribute it well and perhaps make sure I don't use to much, go lighter but all over. Thanks for mentioning conditioners and oils you use. Your hair is lovely and I agree about hair routine being something you can live with. I was happy with it but now with increased length, summer and new issue of tangles, I just have to make some changes. Hopefully with all this advice, I will find what works for me.
Today, I did not comb or brush my hair at all. I'm trying finger combing. I was home so I wore it down most of day and no tangles. Maybe this alone will be of great help to me. Keeping fingers crossed.
My routine before was to comb with wide tooth comb in morning, I might use jojoba oil and braid or up-do, then at night, I would brush with BBB for about 20 strokes. Put coconut oil on length of hair and put in loose braid.
The last thing I should mention is that I joined the thread where you wear your hair up for a certain length of time and I've been doing that for quite some time. They let you have maybe 12 days off, I think if you commit to so much time.
I had an anniversary to celebrate and it was just last week and that's when I had the tangled mess. It's the first time I've worn my hair down in a long time. All of a sudden, I remembered I use to get tangles if I wasn't really careful but it's been some time since it was this long. If I have to try everything under the stars, I will to conquer this because I won't cut my hair. I just want to find, as you say, a routine I can live with for summer months.

[Komao]

Started fingercombing today & so far good but have not been outside to much. I never have a problem, inside. It's really raining but will keep this up to see if it helps.

Today is not a wash day for me but do you know how many times you should fingercomb throughout the day. I have been looking all over and some say several times, others once a day and still others every few days or only when you think you need it! I know it will get easier as I proceed with these changes and hopefully will feel confident that I can make decisions, again but this is all new to me. Thanks for suggestions of scarf or silk top. That's on my list too. :)