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heidi w.
April 5th, 2013, 05:40 PM
I read a lot of threads. And I am upset to be reading all these massive hair problems that come along with all types of fixes, so to speak. The one thing I can tell you all is to stop guessing and focus on the problem itself. If you guess around, your hair may reak havoc. The fixes are easily readable and easily do-able. Diet makes a moderate difference. I just read a bunch of ideas people positided about Dandruff for one person, and I am astounded to read that people are recommending hennaing the hair. Hennaing the hair is the worst thing ever, because eventually, henna blocks the uptake of conditioner. I've seen it; and the hair turns into a ball of fluff. It takes a few years for this to happen, but it does happen. I promise you that. Hennaing has nothing to do with curing Dandruff. For the most part, Dandruff is not actually curable. You can only hope to manage the symptoms. That's what I do: manage the symptoms. This is the reason henna is not typically mentioned by licensed dressers.
heidi w.

FrozenBritannia
April 5th, 2013, 05:45 PM
You're back! Hi Heidi!

IndigoOptimist
April 5th, 2013, 05:45 PM
Hehe, I haven't been on here in a few weeks (been work) and this was the first thread I clicked on.
Little bit of a vent, but I see your frustration. This is the problem with big communities like this; people will listen to anyone, assuming they know what they're talking about, when really, that person could have no idea at all ;)

JLeighs
April 5th, 2013, 05:46 PM
Hennaing the hair is the worst thing ever, because eventually, henna blocks the uptake of conditioner. I've seen it; and the hair turns into a ball of fluff. It takes a few years for this to happen, but it does happen. I promise you that.

I don't really understand this. If your hennaed hair can absorb water, can't it still absorb conditioner? Or am I misunderstanding what you're saying?

jacqueline101
April 5th, 2013, 06:04 PM
In my humble opinion scritching my scalp helped using fruitice dandruff shampoo and conditioner. I think monistat helped mine too. I wash my combs and brushes more.

Kaelee
April 5th, 2013, 06:12 PM
I don't really understand this. If your hennaed hair can absorb water, can't it still absorb conditioner? Or am I misunderstanding what you're saying?

I don't understand it either. I have been hennaing almost monthly for the past 5 years at least and my hair absorbs things just as well as it ever did. It most certainly did NOT become 'a ball of fluff' nor is it poor condition (quite the contrary in fact.) And that is not guesswork, it is the experience of many long time henna users.

ravenreed
April 5th, 2013, 06:13 PM
Everything on LHC is guesswork because no one method or solution will work for everyone. All anyone can do is speak to personal experience.

In2wishin
April 5th, 2013, 06:23 PM
Everything on LHC is guesswork because no one method or solution will work for everyone. All anyone can do is speak to personal experience.

^^^^I agree completely^^^^ (It doesn't hurt to remind ourselves occasionally to make sure what we write is presented as personal experience)

MsBubbles
April 5th, 2013, 06:23 PM
Heh. My whole life is guesswork.

ravenreed
April 5th, 2013, 06:29 PM
You and me both! Many a great adventure in my life starts with the words, "I have no idea what I am doing, it's all an experiment really." Of course, many a disaster starts with those words too. :p


Heh. My whole life is guesswork.

leslissocool
April 5th, 2013, 06:37 PM
Heh. My whole life is guesswork.

Mine too.


Many people think they have dandruff and instead have things like psoriasis. I did, it wasn't until I went to an actual dermatologists who told me that it was not dandruff, and I was not crazy for thinking the "special" shampoos were making the issue worse.

Henna made my hair less poofy, straighter, and it absorbs everything. Build up of products inhibit moisture absorption, not just henna.

Labs*R*Us
April 5th, 2013, 07:10 PM
I don't use henna, so maybe I'm out of my depth here, but isn't dandruff (scoriasis, too) a scalp condition (opposed to a hair condition)? I'm not clear how henna (target hair) would provide an ongoing scalp (skin) treatment. To me, it's like having acne, but trying to do something to brows and lashes to cure it.

hippie girl
April 5th, 2013, 07:22 PM
Heh. My whole life is guesswork.
This! Me, too, MsB!

(Hi, MsBubbles! :))

lapushka
April 5th, 2013, 07:29 PM
Henna never did anything for me except make my hair (scalp) less oily in the week after it was applied, and it thickened, coated, the strands. But that's it. I have SD and it never touched that (or the flakes) for one bit. I have no idea why anyone would suggest henna is a "cure" for flaky scalp or SD!

starlamelissa
April 5th, 2013, 07:34 PM
The best thing for my husbands sebhorratic derm and dandruff (and we have tried lots of things) has been daily washing with dandruff shampoo. It's the medication that helps, not any woo woo stuff.

kdaniels8811
April 5th, 2013, 07:36 PM
I love henna, been using it for 20 years or more, no ball of fluff, just lovely color and condition and shine. We each need to research to find what works for us.

jojo
April 5th, 2013, 07:55 PM
Plus hairdressers dont advocate henna as they are referring to compound henna not BAQ. We are all entitled to our opinions but i find your post rude and offensive to those who do use henna. There are some wonderful henna heads on this forum and ive never once seen a ball of fluff hair on anybody who uses henna. That includes in real life, i know a lot of Indian and Pakistani nurses who use henna and have the most magnificent hair.
Maybe this post would have been better in your blog, than in a thread where it obviously going to antagonise people.

heidi w.
April 5th, 2013, 07:56 PM
I am whole heartedly against hennaing the hair. I inquired about it and learned that it repels the absorption of products. Those who henna, it's fine by me, but I'll never do it. EVER. I have met women with hennaed hair and it's a fluff ball of a disgusting mess. Broken hairs, deeply uneven hemlines, etc. It's true that around the fifth year of continually hennaing, the hair will turn on you at some point in time, thereafter. I don't wanna experience that so I don't do it. Good luck to those using henna. Maybe I'm being nasty, but I'm being bluntly honest to not recommend it for the treatment of Dandruff. And it makes a lot of sense to apply monistat. So you have a layer if dead detris on the head and you smear monistat on it. I don't think so. Life is a giant guessing game, so I guess we should all continue guessing. Don't think so. Use your noodle; it's what God gave you a noodle for.
heidi w.

heidi w.
April 5th, 2013, 07:58 PM
Out. Rude me. Sorry to those who monistat and henna.
It's my honest opinion.
Good luck with the guesswork.
heidi w.

mzBANGBANG
April 5th, 2013, 08:16 PM
why didn't you just post it on that thread instead of embarrassing the person who gave that advice and essentially tell the rest of us we are idiots for disagreeing? I agree, it's all guess work. Different things work for different folks. But seriously it's just hair.

heidi w.
April 5th, 2013, 08:27 PM
Because LHC mane forum is filled with assumptions.
FILLED.
It's become a very different place since I was in the hospital for several months, which has only made me MORE outspoken.
It wasn't just one person telling the OP what to do; it was pages filled with guesswork. I worked very hard for years on LHC to undo the guesswork and its back Again.
heidi w.

Kaelee
April 5th, 2013, 08:27 PM
Wow. Yea. If you don't want to henna don't. Theres plenty of reasons not to, maybe you don't like the color or whatever. Different things work for different people. Just like we don't know what will or will not work for your hair, you don't know what will or will not work on our hair. It's ALL guesswork.

ravenreed
April 5th, 2013, 08:38 PM
It always was filled with guesswork because there are no hard and fast answers for any one problem. Anyone who tells you different is trying to sell you something.


Because LHC mane forum is filled with assumptions.
FILLED.
It's become a very different place since I was in the hospital for several months, which has only made me MORE outspoken.
It wasn't just one person telling the OP what to do; it was pages filled with guesswork. I worked very hard for years on LHC to undo the guesswork and its back Again.
heidi w.

Kaelee
April 5th, 2013, 08:58 PM
It always was filled with guesswork because there are no hard and fast answers for any one problem. Anyone who tells you different is trying to sell you something.

Exactly. It's all experimentation. If there was one perfect answer to every question, we wouldn't have any need or want for a forum to share ideas and get new insights. I kmow it has served me well during my time here.

Heidi I somehow missed that you were sick, I do hope that you are much better now!

jeanniet
April 5th, 2013, 09:08 PM
I would have to assert that recommending that someone clarify their hair using three tablespoons of baking soda--and not just once, but multiple times--is just as much guesswork as anything else. Following that advice would absolutely destroy my hair. If you have scientific evidence as to why this would be a reasonable treatment for dandruff, then you should certainly post it. Otherwise, I really don't see how your suggestion was any better than any other suggestion posted. The OP of that thread went to the doctor and does not want to follow the recommended treatment. She asked for advice as to what worked for other people, and that's what was posted in the thread. It's your prerogative to dislike the anecdotal evidence given, but it's what the OP asked for.

bradlea
April 5th, 2013, 09:12 PM
A lot of people like to use being "outspoken" and "blunt" as an excuse for rudeness. :rolleyes: I AM a licensed hairdresser, and I've seen a lot of silly things suggested here, as I'm sure everyone has. But I've never called anyone out because I don't want to be rude. I would only correct someone if I thought it would be incredibly harmful, but most people here are smart enough to use their own judgement. They don't really need yours. This forum has a really nice, friendly atmosphere, and I've rarely seen posts that make people uncomfortable, but this one seems to be doing it.

MsBubbles
April 5th, 2013, 09:16 PM
Life is a giant guessing game, so I guess we should all continue guessing. Don't think so. Use your noodle; it's what God gave you a noodle for.
heidi w.

I'm perfectly fine winging it through life. I get better results that way. You prefer to do things in a more structured way. That's fine with me. It doesn't hurt me any. Live and let live. I'm sorry you were in the hospital, and I hope you are doing better. :blossom:

Mesmerise
April 5th, 2013, 09:29 PM
Plus hairdressers dont advocate henna as they are referring to compound henna not BAQ. We are all entitled to our opinions but i find your post rude and offensive to those who do use henna. There are some wonderful henna heads on this forum and ive never once seen a ball of fluff hair on anybody who uses henna. That includes in real life, i know a lot of Indian and Pakistani nurses who use henna and have the most magnificent hair.
Maybe this post would have been better in your blog, than in a thread where it obviously going to antagonise people.

Yup this. The hairdresser friend I know who freaked out about henna did so "because if you dye over it your hair will melt!!". Obviously that is NOT referring to pure henna. That is referring to henna dyes with metallic salts. That's the ONLY REASON she was against henna because that's what she'd been taught about it (and she hadn't been taught about real henna).

I have never heard of the "ball of fluff syndrome". Maybe some people do have hair that goes awful after several years of henna use. What do I know? I only hennaed monthly for two years ;). All I know is that my hair didn't behave THAT differently after henna. It certainly didn't have any weird blockage against conditioners. (And umm... we're talking after something like over 20 full applications on the length...).

There are numerous reasons why people have scalp issues, that is true. There's no "one size fits all" answer. However, people come to LHC asking for advice, and posters will simply tell what THEY know or what has worked for them! For some people henna may have worked. For some, it's something else. Again, it depends what causes the dandruff (is it a condition like psoriasis, or is it caused by a fungal problem, for example - you can't treat one the same way that you'd treat the other).

Labs*R*Us
April 5th, 2013, 09:31 PM
If you henna and it's no problem = henna
If you henna and you don't like - don't henna
When in doubt, cut out all the crap and keep it simple (maybe your hair can't keep up with YOU!) LOL

Please don't dump on Heidi W. She is one of the most revered members on this site (check out her hair!) She has some common sense stuff to share with newbies who want to grow their hair out. If you are a true long hair, check her and others out! If not, then shave, cut, henna, dye, and chemically fry your hair.... but find another site where you have comrades!

Magalo
April 5th, 2013, 09:38 PM
Please don't dump on Heidi W. She is one of the most revered members on this site (check out her hair!) She has some common sense stuff to share with newbies who want to grow their hair out.

Oh, I guess this is a valid excuse for being extremely rude?

heidi w.
April 5th, 2013, 09:43 PM
That's me. I'm rude. Please explain to me WHAT was rude. Really. What was rude. Who did I call out by name? What did I say that is so offensive. You come to LHC to learn, not to guess. That's been my general experience here. I desired to learn, and learn I did. A lot. A lot. I'm glad to say I'm not stupid too much anymore.
heidi w.

jeanniet
April 5th, 2013, 09:43 PM
Please don't dump on Heidi W. She is one of the most revered members on this site (check out her hair!) She has some common sense stuff to share with newbies who want to grow their hair out. If you are a true long hair, check her and others out! If not, then shave, cut, henna, dye, and chemically fry your hair.... but find another site where you have comrades!

I sincerely hope that you are not implying that people who do any of these things are not welcome here, because that would be very much not KNIT.

mzBANGBANG
April 5th, 2013, 09:43 PM
If you henna, it's no problem, but then you're not a "true long hair"? Seriously so insulting and off putting. I guess since I blow dry my input isn't valued. Well darn!

Kyla
April 5th, 2013, 09:47 PM
If you henna and it's no problem = henna
If you henna and you don't like - don't henna
When in doubt, cut out all the crap and keep it simple (maybe your hair can't keep up with YOU!) LOL

Please don't dump on Heidi W. She is one of the most revered members on this site (check out her hair!) She has some common sense stuff to share with newbies who want to grow their hair out. If you are a true long hair, check her and others out! If not, then shave, cut, henna, dye, and chemically fry your hair.... but find another site where you have comrades!

Addressing the bolded, I think the definition of a "true" long hair is pretty relative, and shouldn't be used to discourage people from this site or from asking advice here regarding any type of hair (or life) choices. This site offers information beyond just long hair care, and I think that's a good thing and no one should be shamed for their hair decisions.

Labs*R*Us
April 5th, 2013, 09:48 PM
I don't think she was being extremely rude.... but was saying what has been said time, after time, after time. But being a new person, you wouldn't know this. After all, this site is much older than you have been here, and most people respect that. And from someone who has almost ankle-length hair (and know about Heidi), as well as her wealth of information, I think (as a newbie) I'd be more prone to do so silent reading, before posting.

Magalo
April 5th, 2013, 09:50 PM
I am whole heartedly against hennaing the hair. I inquired about it and learned that it repels the absorption of products. Those who henna, it's fine by me, but I'll never do it. EVER. I have met women with hennaed hair and it's a fluff ball of a disgusting mess. Broken hairs, deeply uneven hemlines, etc. It's true that around the fifth year of continually hennaing, the hair will turn on you at some point in time, thereafter. I don't wanna experience that so I don't do it. Good luck to those using henna. Maybe I'm being nasty, but I'm being bluntly honest to not recommend it for the treatment of Dandruff. And it makes a lot of sense to apply monistat. So you have a layer if dead detris on the head and you smear monistat on it. I don't think so. Life is a giant guessing game, so I guess we should all continue guessing. Don't think so. Use your noodle; it's what God gave you a noodle for.
heidi w.

You're agains't hennaing? We should all stop doing it then!!

No, really. Why are you even saying this? You didn't even tried it. You're only talking from a couple of observations if I understood correctly? Because you saw a couple women with trashed hair+henna means nothing. (did they used BAQ henna? How did they took care of their hair during all this time? so many variants!) Every woman I see in my city with hair past tailbone have damaged, crumbling hair, does it means that hair past tailbone = ugly hair? Nope!

"Around the fifth year of hennaing..."
This is the most unrealistic statistic I have heard in a long time! Some people henna their whole head every month. Some people do 2, 5, 10 whole head then only do the roots. Some people do one whole head then roots only. Some people only uses glosses. But all of them, after 5 years, will have trashed hair!!! Do you realize how little sense your statement has?

What are you trying to bring with your negativity? What's the point?

kpzra
April 5th, 2013, 09:51 PM
How do you think new treatment are discovered? By guessing at what will work. If no one tired anything new then everyone would be doing the same thing. Stating as an absolute fact that people who henna their hair will end up with
fluff ball of a disgusting mess. Broken hairs, deeply uneven hemlines, etc when there is plenty of evidence on this very site is just rude. That is your opinion on something you have never tried, not absolute fact as you try and present it. I'm sorry you had to cut all your hair off and I don't know if that is what is causing your tone but your posts just seem bitchy towards those who want to experiment with their hair or do something outside your comfort zone. Treating people like they are idiots is a sure way to get them to ignore anything you have to say that might be helpful.

Mesmerise
April 5th, 2013, 09:52 PM
That's me. I'm rude. Please explain to me WHAT was rude. Really. What was rude. Who did I call out by name? What did I say that is so offensive. You come to LHC to learn, not to guess. That's been my general experience here. I desired to learn, and learn I did. A lot. A lot. I'm glad to say I'm not stupid too much anymore.
heidi w.

You don't have to call people out by name in order to be rude or offensive! You're implying that people who suggest using henna are clueless because of how bad YOU know henna is. Some people have extremely positive experiences with henna and you've just smashed every one of them down with your words. You don't HAVE to name names!

Overall I feel your contributions to this forum have been fantastic, but recently there have been posts where you've said things that have offended me, not because you've called me out by name... but because of what you have implied about me (and others like me) because of the decisions I've made.

It has only been in recent weeks, however, that I have experienced this from your posts. I never felt this way from your posts before. I was really glad to see you back here, Heidi W. but you seem to have changed and that saddens me a lot!

Mommyof4
April 5th, 2013, 09:53 PM
If you henna and it's no problem = henna
If you henna and you don't like - don't henna
When in doubt, cut out all the crap and keep it simple (maybe your hair can't keep up with YOU!) LOL

Please don't dump on Heidi W. She is one of the most revered members on this site (check out her hair!) She has some common sense stuff to share with newbies who want to grow their hair out. If you are a true long hair, check her and others out! If not, then shave, cut, henna, dye, and chemically fry your hair.... but find another site where you have comrades!


Ouch.. so if I cut, henna, dye or use chemicals on my hair... I'm not welcome at LHC?
What exactly is a "true long hair"?

So, what happened to KNIT?!

Why so much discrimination? This is a forum where people can help each other and admire their hair journeys, period.

There should be no requirements to be a member of this site, except the ones posted for being a member.

This statement is hurtful.

ravenreed
April 5th, 2013, 09:56 PM
I agree. Heidi doesn't seem her old self. I am hoping that it is a temporary thing.


You don't have to call people out by name in order to be rude or offensive! You're implying that people who suggest using henna are clueless because of how bad YOU know henna is. Some people have extremely positive experiences with henna and you've just smashed every one of them down with your words. You don't HAVE to name names!

Overall I feel your contributions to this forum have been fantastic, but recently there have been posts where you've said things that have offended me, not because you've called me out by name... but because of what you have implied about me (and others like me) because of the decisions I've made.

It has only been in recent weeks, however, that I have experienced this from your posts. I never felt this way from your posts before. I was really glad to see you back here, Heidi W. but you seem to have changed and that saddens me a lot!

Kyla
April 5th, 2013, 09:58 PM
[/COLOR]


Ouch.. so if I cut, henna, dye or use chemicals on my hair... I'm not welcome at LHC?
What exactly is a "true long hair"?

So, what happened to KNIT?!

Why so much discrimination? This is a forum where people can help each other and admire their hair journeys, period.

There should be no requirements to be a member of this site, except the ones posted for being a member.

This statement is hurtful.

I agree with all of this, and would like to add that just because a member is new does not mean that they should not post, or that they have nothing to offer in the threads, no matter what condition their hair is. And they shouldn't be ridiculed for any of that.

Kaelee
April 5th, 2013, 10:00 PM
That's me. I'm rude. Please explain to me WHAT was rude. Really. What was rude. Who did I call out by name? What did I say that is so offensive. You come to LHC to learn, not to guess. That's been my general experience here. I desired to learn, and learn I did. A lot. A lot. I'm glad to say I'm not stupid too much anymore.
heidi w.

I think you deserve an answer, but I'm not sure how to put that answer into words. I think that may BE the answer...not what was said, but how it was said. It's fine that you think henna is bad for hair...I think monistat is probably not the best thing to put on your head...so I don't do it. But I don't state it as fact, as if everyone here should KNOW BETTER than to do whatever it is I don't personally choose to do.

That, and there are many long time members of this forum with gorgeous hair who have hennaed their hair for a very long time (years). I've been using henna for somewhere around 5 years. I've not heard of anyone's hair "turning" from it, either here or on a site completely devoted to henna, unless their hair just doesn't get on with henna, which does happen, from what I've gathered, usually after the first use. I certainly haven't experienced it myself. Not with BAQ henna at any rate (and those with the broken, poofy, fried hair, well. They could have had bad henna, they could have been doing other things to their hair other than henna as well. Not saying 100% certain that it WASN'T the henna, but I won't say it WAS either.) Having someone come in and say that everything I've learned about henna in the 5 years I've been using it is wrong, that it's the worst thing ever, with a tone that SEEMS TO (I say 'seems to' because this probably wasn't your intent at all. Text can be horrible like that.) say that I am stupid for doing it...well, that's severely off putting, to say the least.

I'm not sure that's how you meant to come off...in fact I'm betting that you DIDN'T mean to come off that way and maybe you're sitting there wondering why everyone is jumping on you! :flower:


If you henna, it's no problem, but then you're not a "true long hair"? Seriously so insulting and off putting. I guess since I blow dry my input isn't valued. Well darn!

Yikes. I read it the same way. *shudder*

There are some nasty threads around here lately. I guess it's time for that LHC 'spring fever' again. ;)

Labs*R*Us
April 5th, 2013, 10:01 PM
Shaved and shorn have an interest in some site, but not here. This is the LONG HAIR COMMUNITY. I think the site and its members (at large) would agree that shaved heads, buzzes, bowl cuts, high-tights, or any other names for short-cut hair styles have another site than that for LONG HAIRED MEMBERS. Admins?

jeanniet
April 5th, 2013, 10:01 PM
The thing is, people should be able to post what has worked for them, especially when asked. We all have to decide if advice/suggestions offered are reasonable or not. Just because something has been posted by a long-term member doesn't automatically make it valid for every head of hair. As I mentioned, if I used the quantity of baking soda Heidi suggested on my occasionally flaky, itchy scalp, it would be an unmitigated disaster. Perhaps it worked for her, and that's why she made the suggestion, which is the same reason everyone else in that thread made their own suggestions--and that's exactly what the OP asked for. Suggestions. If we all have to start backing up our suggestions with evidence, this is going to be a very boring site.

Mommyof4
April 5th, 2013, 10:04 PM
I don't think she was being extremely rude.... but was saying what has been said time, after time, after time. But being a new person, you wouldn't know this. After all, this site is much older than you have been here, and most people respect that. And from someone who has almost ankle-length hair (and know about Heidi), as well as her wealth of information, I think (as a newbie) I'd be more prone to do so silent reading, before posting.

Yikes... You only have 584 posts.. you've been a member since 2007.. you must not be pro-posting anyways.

So, there is a length of hair we need before we're allowed to be "real members"?

There are moderators on here that I'm sure would disagree.

I'm glad not everyone views newbies with disdain.

Kyla
April 5th, 2013, 10:06 PM
Shaved and shorn have an interest in some site, but not here. This is the LONG HAIR COMMUNITY. I think the site and its members (at large) would agree that shaved heads, buzzes, bowl cuts, high-tights, or any other names for short-cut hair styles have another site than that for LONG HAIRED MEMBERS. Admins?

What about members who have had long hair but want a change, and don't want to leave this community? Or ones that want long hair in the future, but also want to have a bit of fun and change it up before they grow it long? We have many members from what I've seen who do things just like that. I don't want to argue with you, but I don't think it's fair to discourage people from posting just because of their hairstyle, or claim that they are not "true long hairs" because of their methods of care.

Kaelee
April 5th, 2013, 10:08 PM
Shaved and shorn have an interest in some site, but not here. This is the LONG HAIR COMMUNITY. I think the site and its members (at large) would agree that shaved heads, buzzes, bowl cuts, high-tights, or any other names for short-cut hair styles have another site than that for LONG HAIRED MEMBERS. Admins?

Wow! There are several members here, long term members who have cut their hair short, or have short hair and are trying to grow it out, or come here just for advice on one thing and stay for the community. In fact I saw in another thread that our own Heidi just had to cut her floor length hair to chin. :( (Had too, not wanted to).

Fortunately, all are welcome here, not just people with a certain hairstyle. ;)

gossamer
April 5th, 2013, 10:09 PM
Shaved and shorn have an interest in some site, but not here. This is the LONG HAIR COMMUNITY. I think the site and its members (at large) would agree that shaved heads, buzzes, bowl cuts, high-tights, or any other names for short-cut hair styles have another site than that for LONG HAIRED MEMBERS. Admins?

I'm probably going to regret getting involved here, but...

If someone joined with a shaved head or a bowl cut, stating their curiosity about maybe looking to grow "long," which for them meant APL, would we discriminate against them? What if they just wanted some advice about having healthy, shiny chin length hair?

I remind myself often that everyone here has a different definition of what long hair means to them, AND this isn't the "grow hair as long as you can grow it community" even if that's what I'm personally going for.

jeanniet
April 5th, 2013, 10:11 PM
Should long-term members who dye or bleach leave? Members going through chemo or other medical issues that have caused them to lose their hair? Do they need to leave as well? What constitutes long hair? Should anyone with hair shorter than waist be banned? I hope you see where this is going. There are no site rules requiring that any of us keep our hair a certain way. I certainly wouldn't recommend that anyone flat iron their hair on a daily basis, but there's no site rule against it.

Mommyof4
April 5th, 2013, 10:13 PM
Shaved and shorn have an interest in some site, but not here. This is the LONG HAIR COMMUNITY. I think the site and its members (at large) would agree that shaved heads, buzzes, bowl cuts, high-tights, or any other names for short-cut hair styles have another site than that for LONG HAIRED MEMBERS. Admins?

I would LOVE TO hear from the admins about this! I'm sure they would not agree with your biased posts. What is the deal? Why do you care if someone has short hair? What if someone had cancer and needed chemo, then wanted to grow their hair out? You would not approve of them being a member? What if someone just wants to grow a bob that is healthy and wants to benefit from the info on this site, and likes the friends they meet on here? Your definition of long, is that, YOURS. Opinions are like bum holes, right?

This is a free site, shouldn't everyone that the admins have approved as a member have the same rights as you?

What if your hair had a major shed, what if you had something tragic happen, and your hair was cut to your shoulders? Would you be shunned by your standards? My great-grandmother had her floor length ringlets that would have made even a long time member of LHC ooh and aah cut to her chin by a nurse that couldn't get through her hair during a surgery following a car wreck. I would hate to think if that happened to someone on this site, and you caught wind of it!

Mommyof4
April 5th, 2013, 10:15 PM
Should long-term members who dye or bleach leave? Members going through chemo or other medical issues that have caused them to lose their hair? Do they need to leave as well? What constitutes long hair? Should anyone with hair shorter than waist be banned? I hope you see where this is going. There are no site rules requiring that any of us keep our hair a certain way. I certainly wouldn't recommend that anyone flat iron their hair on a daily basis, but there's no site rule against it.



LOL.. post twinkies :D

Sarahlabyrinth
April 5th, 2013, 10:16 PM
I certainly think that anyone interested in hair care, whatever the state of or length of hair, should be made welcome here.

Mommyof4
April 5th, 2013, 10:17 PM
Wow! There are several members here, long term members who have cut their hair short, or have short hair and are trying to grow it out, or come here just for advice on one thing and stay for the community. In fact I saw in another thread that our own Heidi just had to cut her floor length hair to chin. :( (Had too, not wanted to).

Fortunately, all are welcome here, not just people with a certain hairstyle. ;)

I wonder if Heidi was upset when she read Labs R Us' posts..

I'm shocked at the harsh posts... I don't get it.

ravenreed
April 5th, 2013, 10:21 PM
Really?! I didn't sign anything saying that I would never cut, henna, dye, or fry my hair after signing up here. My hair keeps on growing, too. When did this become a virgin hair only forum? Because I seemed to have missed that memo.


If you henna and it's no problem = henna
If you henna and you don't like - don't henna
When in doubt, cut out all the crap and keep it simple (maybe your hair can't keep up with YOU!) LOL

Please don't dump on Heidi W. She is one of the most revered members on this site (check out her hair!) She has some common sense stuff to share with newbies who want to grow their hair out. If you are a true long hair, check her and others out! If not, then shave, cut, henna, dye, and chemically fry your hair.... but find another site where you have comrades!

Kaelee
April 5th, 2013, 10:22 PM
I wonder if Heidi was upset when she read Labs R Us' posts..

I'm shocked at the harsh posts... I don't get it.

Every once in a while, :poop: gets stirred up here. I don't know what it is. Maybe it's the change of seasons. Maybe everyone collectively drank too much Red Bull and is crashing hard. ;) I know I've been feeling much biotchier lately, and I hope I haven't offended anyone. It seems like there's an occasional collective bad mood here. This too shall pass.

Mommyof4
April 5th, 2013, 10:29 PM
Every once in a while, :poop: gets stirred up here. I don't know what it is. Maybe it's the change of seasons. Maybe everyone collectively drank too much Red Bull and is crashing hard. ;) I know I've been feeling much biotchier lately, and I hope I haven't offended anyone. It seems like there's an occasional collective bad mood here. This too shall pass.

When I first joined, my first 5-6 posts were met with so much hate and rudeness, I almost left.
Thankfully, a moderator messaged me, telling me that 99% of everyone at LHC was glad to have a new member, and to just keep on keeping on lol.

Almost two years later, I have some very BEST friends that I've met on this site, 2 that I speak to daily, 1 that I've met in person from across the world, and another that I'm planning on meeting in Europe within the year.

I LOVE the LHC, but I can't imagine trying to deter people from posting or being members, or calling themselves a long hair.

Bad moods happen, but this seems to be more of a dislike that some of the posters have expressed...

jeanniet
April 5th, 2013, 10:29 PM
I do have to wonder why we have a sub-forum for henna if hennaheads are supposed to go somewhere else.

Kaelee
April 5th, 2013, 10:33 PM
When I first joined, my first 5-6 posts were met with so much hate and rudeness, I almost left.
Thankfully, a moderator messaged me, telling me that 99% of everyone at LHC was glad to have a new member, and to just keep on keeping on lol.

Almost two years later, I have some very BEST friends that I've met on this site, 2 that I speak to daily, 1 that I've met in person from across the world, and another that I'm planning on meeting in Europe within the year.

I LOVE the LHC, but I can't imagine trying to deter people from posting or being members, or calling themselves a long hair.

Bad moods happen, but this seems to be more of a dislike that some of the posters have expressed...

I have heard of people being extremely rude and driving others away...I almost never, see it here. I really don't know what goes on sometimes. Sometimes I see someone get upset and leave, and I can't figure out why even when I see it happen! Sometimes people just clash for some reason. I also don't read every thread (or even most of them) so I miss a LOT that goes on.

I'm glad you kept on keeping on, the majority of us, I'm sure, are glad to have you!!! :D I love this place. I came for one discussion in particular, then mostly hung out in the off topic forums until my hair got past the "I can only do a ponytail" stage. I've met some amazing people here.

Kaelee
April 5th, 2013, 10:33 PM
I do have to wonder why we have a sub-forum for henna if hennaheads are supposed to go somewhere else.

*giggle* I was wondering the same thing. Or if henna is so bad for your hair, then why would enough of us do it that it warrants its own (quite active) forum?

ETA: I know exactly what this thread needs... A large amount of :cheese: :cheese: :cheese: ;)

Sarahlabyrinth
April 5th, 2013, 10:37 PM
I see so many GORGEOUS hennaed heads of hair here, not a pouffball in sight!

Thinthondiel
April 5th, 2013, 10:38 PM
Heidi W., I don't see you putting forward any scientific evidence for your claims about henna or BS. So I'm guessing what you've experienced for yourself is "fact", while what other people have experienced is "guesswork"? And other people are stupid for saying what has worked for them, while you're not. Well, okay then.


And Labs*R*Us, I cannot believe the implications you've made that older members' opinions are more worth than newer members', that newbies basically shouldn't post but rather watch and learn from the revered "elders", and that people who henna, dye, cut, etc. shouldn't be members. Who are you to decide who's allowed to be a member or not, and what members can or cannot do? As far as I know, you're not the one in charge of making the rules here on LHC.


ETA (I forgot to address this point):


Because LHC mane forum is filled with assumptions.
FILLED.
It's become a very different place since I was in the hospital for several months, which has only made me MORE outspoken.
It wasn't just one person telling the OP what to do; it was pages filled with guesswork. I worked very hard for years on LHC to undo the guesswork and its back Again.
heidi w.


You worked hard to undo the guesswork and don't like that it's back. Well, guess what, this isn't your personal site, and if the way things are done by other members on here isn't to your liking, then... too bad. It isn't your job to police what other members do. And what do you expect when someone asks for advice on here; that someone will magically know the exact right answer that will work for the OP, and that only one person will therefore have to answer? It seems to me that the fact that a question has been answered before never stops you from answering it (often over and over again, in multiple posts). But then I guess maybe you're the one who has the right answer to everything and all the rest of us should just refrain from ever giving advice?

Labs*R*Us
April 5th, 2013, 10:50 PM
Telephone game, for real!

Mommyof4
April 5th, 2013, 10:51 PM
HUH? Telephone game?

We're able to quote posts.. I'm not sure how fact of what has been said could be considered the telephone game.

akurah
April 5th, 2013, 10:52 PM
Only skimmed, but wanted to chime in...

Heidi, I'm worried about you. Are you okay? This seems out of character for you.

heidi w.
April 5th, 2013, 10:54 PM
I'm simply upset that people are writing clearly incorrect information. There is no way that hennaing the hair solves on any level Dandruff.
heidi w.

Labs*R*Us
April 5th, 2013, 10:54 PM
Oh, my. What uglies are quickly revealed, my beauties! Please.Stop.

Rivanariko
April 5th, 2013, 10:56 PM
In almost 4 years, I think this is the saddest thread I've ever read. :( I agree with those saying that I hope we get the old Heidi W. back. I've always looked forward to reading your posts and had a lot of respect for your opinion and experience, especially as our hair types seem similar.

But honestly, to state almost anything that has to do with long hair care as "fact" is ludicrous. I tried my darndest when I first got here to go 'cone free because that's all I read about was how AWFUL 'cones were. If I'd kept up with it, I would have shaved my head in frustration because it didn't work for me. At. All. In fact my hair started breaking off and falling apart in my hands. I literally had handfuls of hair falling out constantly. I switched back to 'cones, and there was much rejoicing. I've reached classic despite what I've always been told about my hair type "not being able to grow long" by carefully considering the advice that I see on here. I don't follow everything that anyone says. I do my research, as everyone should. Henna, Cassia and Indigo were all suggested for helping with my fragile, fine hair. I decided against them because I didn't want to change my color and I know that Henna isn't something that you do on a whim, and I hope that everyone else here does as well.

Furthermore, the idea that anyone who doesn't conform to a certain set of rules should "go elsewhere" is quite disturbing to me. There are several long term members on here with amazing hair that "break rules" on a regular basis. Whether that's dying, blow-drying, washing every day or anything else. Different strokes and all that.

I'm just very saddened by the tone of this thread. What happened to KNIT? We're a community, we shouldn't be ostracizing people.

Labs*R*Us
April 5th, 2013, 10:57 PM
akurah, I also asked. Heidi W. is revered on LHC.

jeanniet
April 5th, 2013, 11:01 PM
I think we are treading on dangerous ground with the "us vs. them" mentality--whether it be oldtimers vs.newbies, or ultra-longhairs vs. shorties. Division is not what this community is supposed to be about. Over the past few years, I've seen members grow their hair out, cut it, and (sometimes) grow it out again. I don't remember anyone being asked to leave because their hair was shorter than when they first joined. I also don't remember any specific statements that newbies shouldn't feel free to post-quite the opposite. In fact, some of our newer (within a couple of years) members actually have very long hair, so if anything, their comments and suggestions on care should be very welcomed!

jeanniet
April 5th, 2013, 11:06 PM
Oh, my. What uglies are quickly revealed, my beauties! Please.Stop.

...shave, cut, henna, dye, and chemically fry your hair.... but find another site where you have comrades!

Ugly indeed...sadly.

Mommyof4
April 5th, 2013, 11:11 PM
...shave, cut, henna, dye, and chemically fry your hair.... but find another site where you have comrades!

Ugly indeed...sadly.

I agree... I found the "uglies" post to be a little.... the pot calling the kettle black.. Just sayin'.

Labs*R*Us
April 5th, 2013, 11:19 PM
Heidi W. is in hospital. Can we PLEASE END this post?

BrightEyes
April 5th, 2013, 11:19 PM
If not, then shave, cut, henna, dye, and chemically fry your hair.... but find another site where you have comrades!

This is one of the most hurtful comments I've read on the LHC... and I've been a member for over 3 years. I bleach and dye my hair, I sometimes heat style and my hair is short because although I really do want long hair - I just have the hardest time getting past shoulder length. For some reason that length is so hard for me to get past (and yes, my hair is at the moment shorter than it was when I first joined). But I do want long hair, that is why I am here, it is my goal.

Now though, I wonder how welcome am I really? Do I need to find another site where I can hopefully find "comrades", just because growing my hair is more difficult for me than others?

Quixii
April 5th, 2013, 11:21 PM
Overall I feel your contributions to this forum have been fantastic, but recently there have been posts where you've said things that have offended me, not because you've called me out by name... but because of what you have implied about me (and others like me) because of the decisions I've made.

It has only been in recent weeks, however, that I have experienced this from your posts. I never felt this way from your posts before. I was really glad to see you back here, Heidi W. but you seem to have changed and that saddens me a lot!
Agreed. Heidi, I've always felt like your posts have been honest and blunt, but still positive and helpful. But whatever happened to you recently has made you come back not just blunt, but offensive and inconsiderate.
You can be however you want or need to be, but you're offending people now.

And Heidi has not been the only person to have posted very sad things in this thread. :(

leslissocool
April 5th, 2013, 11:23 PM
Agreed. Heidi, I've always felt like your posts have been honest and blunt, but still positive and helpful. But whatever happened to you recently has made you come back not just blunt, but offensive and inconsiderate.
You can be however you want or need to be, but you're offending people now.

And Heidi has not been the only person to have posted very sad things in this thread. :(

Absolutely. Now in multiple threads.

kpzra
April 5th, 2013, 11:29 PM
Heidi W. is in hospital. Can we PLEASE END this post?

She said she was in the hospital, which many members have wished her well about. That still has nothing to do with you stating that if your hair isn't long and virgin you need to leave. I've read many of Heidis past posts but like many, I seem to sense a change. I don't know if it's her health, losing her long hair (which btw with your comment you told her she doesn't belong here since her hair is short), or what but this thread she started is out of line to many here. They feel insulted and hurt by her comment, whether they were meant that way or not. Text speak and online postings can seem harsh, that's why most use similes to help convey their tone.

jeanniet
April 5th, 2013, 11:35 PM
Heidi W. is in hospital. Can we PLEASE END this post?

I am very sorry that Heidi is ill, and I wish her all the best. However, I think some very valid concerns have been raised in this thread--on all sides--and I don't see why those concerns can't be discussed with respect. As I see it, the main contention seems to be that some advice is (or isn't) more valid than others. Really, though, ALL the advice given here is based on personal experience, meaning that all that can really be said about it is that it's been valid for that particular person. I think all of us can think of instances where we tried something that worked for many other people, and it simply didn't work for us. Does that make the advice wrong? Not really. I don't see how henna could cure dandruff, but on the other hand, if it apparently worked for someone, I can't discount it either. On the other hand, I don't see how massive quantities of baking soda could cure dandruff, but apparently it's worked for at least one person, so I can't discount it. I just wouldn't use it on myself, because I already know that much baking soda would be very problematic for my hair. I've tried any number of things based on advice I've read here (I love experimentation, lol), and some of it worked great, and some didn't. I don't believe that what didn't work was bad, but it was bad for me. That doesn't make it wrong. Why is this an issue?

jojo
April 5th, 2013, 11:53 PM
This is one of the most hurtful comments I've read on the LHC... and I've been a member for over 3 years. I bleach and dye my hair, I sometimes heat style and my hair is short because although I really do want long hair - I just have the hardest time getting past shoulder length. For some reason that length is so hard for me to get past (and yes, my hair is at the moment shorter than it was when I first joined). But I do want long hair, that is why I am here, it is my goal.

Now though, I wonder how welcome am I really? Do I need to find another site where I can hopefully find "comrades", just because growing my hair is more difficult for me than others?
I thought the same, ive been a member for 6 years and i havent recieved any messages off mods saying i now have the right to be rude, patronising and arrogant to newer members? Though i am thinking the same as bright eyes, i henna and " gasp" i straighten my hair sometimes...id have got written permission from oh holier one if id have realised!
Im sorry Heidi has been ill, but really ther is no excuse for the rude, obnoxious attitude she displays in this thread.

humble_knight
April 6th, 2013, 12:00 AM
Heidi W. is in hospital. Can we PLEASE END this post?

Can we pray for her to get better soon, more like.

Labs*R*Us
April 6th, 2013, 12:11 AM
Can we pray for her to get better soon, more like.

Amen! And thanks.

Bunnysaur
April 6th, 2013, 12:14 AM
I find this thread really upsetting. heidi, you've always been rather blunt, and I came to respect it as you usually gave good advice and it was part of your charm, if you will. I just started hennaing my hair to help control my scalp problems, and I was really offended by this thread, and quite a few of the posts in it (hi, Labs R Us). I'm barely past APL, and I henna and blow dry. Plus, it's not fair to say that newbies should wait before posting anything. Who's to say they haven't, anyway? I know I "lurked" for at least a few weeks before I created my account.
heidi, you've contributed so much over the years you've been here, but I agree that you've definitely changed a bit recently. I'm truly sorry you lost your hair, and hope that you're recovering well from whatever put you in the hospital.

UltraBella
April 6th, 2013, 12:25 AM
Please don't dump on Heidi W. She is one of the most revered members on this site (check out her hair!) She has some common sense stuff to share with newbies who want to grow their hair out. If you are a true long hair, check her and others out! If not, then shave, cut, henna, dye, and chemically fry your hair.... but find another site where you have comrades!

How silly of you. I've loved my hair when it was very long and I love it now much shorter - and often heat styled - I don't give two hoots about whether or not YOU think I am worthy of being a member here. It appears that no one else does either.

Heidi no longer has long hair, does she still fit your criteria for being a member here ? I certainly hope she didn't find your posts to be hurtful, she's obviously already been through quite a bit.

LHCers : Something to consider - an extended hospital stay and multiple strokes can certainly alter someone's outlook, personality and ability to cope. I ask for patience, Heidi is a good person. Heidi, I ask for patience from you too, we don't deserve to be put down and treated unkindly.

AnqeIicDemise
April 6th, 2013, 12:29 AM
http://0.tqn.com/d/esl/1/0/O/3/wine_cheese.jpg


<3 I *do* think its Spring Fever. Or something like it. I've been off-kilter off forums too.

Sarahlabyrinth
April 6th, 2013, 12:42 AM
Hey everyone lets start showing some kindness and tolerance on here.
Heidi W, I'm sorry you have been ill and had to lose your hair. I hope you make a good recovery and continue to be a much loved and cherished member here on TLHC.

ravenreed
April 6th, 2013, 12:43 AM
I hadn't realized that it was strokes that put Heidi in the hospital. That certainly can affect someone's outlook and personality. I had chalked Heidi's recent grumpiness up to being unwell, and I still have hopes that she will find her old self again. Heidi, I hope you get better quickly. :blossom:


How silly of you. I've loved my hair when it was very long and I love it now much shorter - and often heat styled - I don't give two hoots about whether or not YOU think I am worthy of being a member here. It appears that no one else does either.

Heidi no longer has long hair, does she still fit your criteria for being a member here ? I certainly hope she didn't find your posts to be hurtful, she's obviously already been through quite a bit.

LHCers : Something to consider - an extended hospital stay and multiple strokes can certainly alter someone's outlook, personality and ability to cope. I ask for patience, Heidi is a good person. Heidi, I ask for patience from you too, we don't deserve to be put down and treated unkindly.

Labs*R*Us
April 6th, 2013, 12:56 AM
You are, indeed, welcome always, Brighteyes. Always! The comments weren't directed towards you at all. :)

Quixii
April 6th, 2013, 12:59 AM
<3 I *do* think its Spring Fever. Or something like it. I've been off-kilter off forums too.
This does seem to happen this time every year on here.
Wish it didn't, though.

UltraBella
April 6th, 2013, 12:59 AM
I hadn't realized that it was strokes that put Heidi in the hospital. That certainly can affect someone's outlook and personality. I had chalked Heidi's recent grumpiness up to being unwell, and I still have hopes that she will find her old self again. Heidi, I hope you get better quickly. :blossom:

Yes, she had four strokes.
I'm thankful she's still with us.

AnqeIicDemise
April 6th, 2013, 01:00 AM
I blame the sudden amount of sunshine after darkness. I get squinty eyed and unfocused. :P

no, seriously though. I get crankier in Spring and I don't know why. Maybe its the whole spring forward thing? -shrug-

Labs*R*Us
April 6th, 2013, 01:14 AM
The fruit and kitty are perfect spring pics!

Ravenwind
April 6th, 2013, 01:21 AM
I think if someone's hair looks like a ball of fluff, with an uneven hemline, etc. is just someone who doesn't take care of their hair, not necessarily because of the henna. And all beauty schools teach people that henna is bad because they're talking about compound henna. That's the "henna" that contains metallic salts and is really bad for your hair. It is known that henna can dry out the hair but it's nothing that a little oil and conditioning can't fix.

jojo
April 6th, 2013, 01:49 AM
I think Lab R Us owes the biggest appology you deliberately added fuel to the fire and upset a lot of people, myself included. If your big enough to insult people, then be big enough to re- read your posts and eat humble pie.

ravenreed
April 6th, 2013, 02:00 AM
I get really cranky and crotchety in the winter. In the spring I get a brief burst of optimism, just in time to deal with time change.


I blame the sudden amount of sunshine after darkness. I get squinty eyed and unfocused. :P

no, seriously though. I get crankier in Spring and I don't know why. Maybe its the whole spring forward thing? -shrug-

Labs*R*Us
April 6th, 2013, 02:13 AM
Jojo, bite it. I owe you nothing. I will defend an old friend, if I think she is right, which I DO, and will. If you don't like what I say, ignore it. I have the right to say what I want, as do you. If you don't like what I say, ignore it and move on.

Rivanariko
April 6th, 2013, 02:24 AM
Labs*R*Us, many of us who have been here a while and who know Heidi have offered her support and commented on how helpful she has always been. I was also unaware as to the exact reason that she had been in the hospital until this thread, though I did know that she had been ill. Those who did not know her before cannot be blamed for not knowing the history. While some comments may have come off as attacking, I think that the tone of the thread towards her has generally changed to one of support.

I would like to know what you did mean by your comment, if you did not intend to imply that those who do not follow an all-natural hair care program and try to grow to the longest lengths possible needed to leave. That seems to be how everyone (including myself) read it. If this was not your intent, please, elaborate.

Labs*R*Us
April 6th, 2013, 02:24 AM
I agree... I found the "uglies" post to be a little.... the pot calling the kettle black.. Just sayin'.

Thank you; duly noted!

jojo
April 6th, 2013, 02:29 AM
Jojo, bite it. I owe you nothing. I will defend an old friend, if I think she is right, which I DO, and will. If you don't like what I say, ignore it. I have the right to say what I want, as do you. If you don't like what I say, ignore it and move on.

I expected this would be your reaction. I suggest as a low poster you familiarise yourself with the forums code of conduct regarding KNIT. Have a lovely day!

Labs*R*Us
April 6th, 2013, 02:45 AM
Please. I was the First Defense for Heidi in the first place, and I do NOT appreciate being the whipping boy! NOR do I appreciate you taking my posts, tearing them apart, and using them out of context to suit YOUR message!! ENOUGH! From here on out, they will be reported. TRY ME.

Naiadryade
April 6th, 2013, 02:46 AM
I posted advice in that thread. I suggested the OP try castor oil, because it has worked for me. I've had dandruff my whole life, and I started putting castor oil on my head for other reasons at a time when I didn't change anything else about my routine. After a week or two, poof, dandruff gone! That's not guesswork. It's a fact about how I have successfully managed my dandruff. I'm pretty sure the majority of the posts in that thread were in the same category. And that's all the OP was asking for: what has worked for others. Unfortunately, the OP tried castor oil and it didn't work. That's really too bad. Maybe your suggestions will work for them. One of the big things I've learned at LHC is that everyone's hair and scalp are unique and react differently to different treatments. There's no one ideal routine for everybody. The best we can do is experiment, and then report on what has worked or not for us as individuals so that others can make educated guesses in their own trials. I really like this aspect of LHC... it's like a bunch of community-powered ongoing science experiments.

Heidi, I'm really sad to hear about your various traumas--strokes, hospital stay, losing your amazing hair. It all sounds devastating. Empathically, I can understand how being on this site again would bring up strong emotions in you, even before considering the effect that strokes have. I will say that when I first came to this site a little over a year ago (I know, I must be a total noob), I found your posts largely helpful and inspiring. I hope you can find your way back to a more peaceful and loving inner state. This community is here to support you, even when we disagree with or feel hurt by your words.

Labs*R*Us, I am confused. Or maybe you are confused. You say you were defending your friend--and I have no problem with you pointing out that Heidi is "revered" and deserves respect, you're right about that. But in the same post, you said that people who cut their hair shouldn't be on this site. That seems like a direct attack against Heidi, which I'm sure was not your intention. Perhaps you should examine your assumptions about worthiness. I don't need anything from you; this is just a suggestion that you can take or leave, like all suggestions on this site.

ETA: FYI, post #94 was the last post when I started writing this. I didn't read posts #95-#98 until after posting this.

kaydana
April 6th, 2013, 02:48 AM
I am whole heartedly against hennaing the hair. I inquired about it and learned that it repels the absorption of products. Those who henna, it's fine by me, but I'll never do it. EVER. I have met women with hennaed hair and it's a fluff ball of a disgusting mess. Broken hairs, deeply uneven hemlines, etc. It's true that around the fifth year of continually hennaing, the hair will turn on you at some point in time, thereafter. I don't wanna experience that so I don't do it. Good luck to those using henna. Maybe I'm being nasty, but I'm being bluntly honest to not recommend it for the treatment of Dandruff. And it makes a lot of sense to apply monistat. So you have a layer if dead detris on the head and you smear monistat on it. I don't think so. Life is a giant guessing game, so I guess we should all continue guessing. Don't think so. Use your noodle; it's what God gave you a noodle for.
heidi w.

Monistat does make a lot of sense if you understand the causes of dandruff. Monistat is antifungal, and will treat the underlying problem to get rid of the dandruff, rather than simply treating the symptoms. Of course, what people think is dandruff often isn't, and may simply be a dry scalp, build up on the scalp or some other non-fungal skin condition, in which case the monistat wouldn't work. This is where the guesswork comes in, because often people don't know what is causing their problems, so something that sounds absurd as a treatment for one condition can make a lot of sense as a treatment for a different one with similar symptoms. For dandruff, monistat is one of the better suggestions. If I recall correctly, henna also has some antifungal properties, which may be why other people have had success with it as a dandruff treatment.

Mesmerise
April 6th, 2013, 02:48 AM
Jojo, bite it. I owe you nothing. I will defend an old friend, if I think she is right, which I DO, and will. If you don't like what I say, ignore it. I have the right to say what I want, as do you. If you don't like what I say, ignore it and move on.

This post is hardly KNIT... It is one thing to agree with someone, it's another altogether to slam anybody who doesn't agree. If this forum was anti-henna there would be no henna sub-forum, would there?

Heidi's opinion of henna is just that... an opinion. As she doesn't use henna, and never has, it's not even personal experience.

As I mentioned on another thread henna is NOT just used for colouring hair. Henna is also used in treating people's skin after they've had a bad reaction to chemo drugs in cancer. If it can be used to soothe skin in that sense, then why is it totally off base to think it could possibly help someone's dandruff prone scalp?

I respect Heidi's opinion a little more when she can also respect mine. As a matter of fact, I respect the opinions of most LHC folks, even when I don't agree with them (the same goes for non-hair related opinions). It's only when someone basically says "I am right and the rest of you who don't agree with me are all just spouting ridiculous opinions!" that I get my back up!

When Heidi suggests using ACV on the scalp I TOTALLY agree with her, and I'd say the same thing. I have found that when my scalp is a little itchy, ACV can be a great remedy!! I'm in no way suggesting that everything Heidi has said is incorrect. However, I do believe that henna can be soothing to the scalp, as many people have learned themselves. I don't believe it trashes everyone's hair (and there are numerous LHC members who can attest to this). I won't say that no one ever experiences negatives from henna, though, as I know there are many who do.

Everyone's experience is valid and relevant!! If someone comes to LHC asking for help, they will get numerous opinions and advice. That's the way it works, and it's the way it should work. Personal experience should never be discounted, although everything should be taken with a grain of salt. What works for one person, won't work for another and so on and so forth.

KittyBird
April 6th, 2013, 03:16 AM
I wasn't going to write anything here, but after learning about what Heidi W. has been through, I would just like to say that I'm terribly sorry. I've always enjoyed reading your posts because you're so insightful and straightforward. I was very happy to see you on the forums again, but I've noticed a change too. I'm no expert on this, but I do believe that the strokes could explain this change in behaviour.

If what you read in the forums makes you so upset, I'd suggest staying away from them. This is not intended as a "go away, you're not welcome" message, but just think about your own well-being. There are plenty of things here that would upset me if I read them, and for the sake of my own sanity, I consistently stay away. There are many members on this forum who hide away in the blogs, and I often do that too. It's like a safe haven. Maybe you could pop over there and see if you find it less upsetting? Also, using your blog to let out some steam could be good for you. I rant there all the time and I always feel a bit better afterwards. :flower: :grouphug:

As for the other poster, seriously. KNIT. Read it, learn it, love it. The definition of long hair is not fixed, everybody has a different view of it. Some people think shoulder length is long, others think only classic and beyond is long. Everybody are welcome here, regardless of how they choose to wear their hair. Diversity is what makes this forum fun and a great place to be.

oktobergoud
April 6th, 2013, 03:19 AM
Shaved and shorn have an interest in some site, but not here. This is the LONG HAIR COMMUNITY. I think the site and its members (at large) would agree that shaved heads, buzzes, bowl cuts, high-tights, or any other names for short-cut hair styles have another site than that for LONG HAIRED MEMBERS. Admins?

This whole thread is such a mess but, as a super-shortie myself, I just wanted to adress this. Did you ever think of that people with really short hair actually WANT long hair? That THAT is the reason why they come to this thread, to grow it out? :) To eventually have long hair? We even have our own thread so we won't have to bother people like you, so what's the problem, really? I can honestly say that I would never have grown out my pixie if it wasn't for this board (and that thread also). I have never found any other community like this! It makes me sad that people actually think like you do :(

(Just wanted to say this, I'm out now, I'm not in need of a nasty discussion :flower:)

(I haven't read all pages of this thread but I noticed a difference in heidi's replies as well, I remember a nasty one from the 'post your outfits'-thread. It just seemed very unlike her. I hope all is well :flower:)

Neneka
April 6th, 2013, 04:40 AM
Heidi w, I wish you get better soon. :blossom: I am sorry to hear about your difficulties.

Kaelee
April 6th, 2013, 05:14 AM
I hadn't realized that it was strokes that put Heidi in the hospital. That certainly can affect someone's outlook and personality. I had chalked Heidi's recent grumpiness up to being unwell, and I still have hopes that she will find her old self again. Heidi, I hope you get better quickly. :blossom:

I agree with this. I didn't know either. Heidi, I'm so sorry again that you are oill, and have lost your hair. (Heartbreaking on both counts). I wish you a speedy and full recovery.

Magalo
April 6th, 2013, 05:17 AM
Please. I was the First Defense for Heidi in the first place, and I do NOT appreciate being the whipping boy! NOR do I appreciate you taking my posts, tearing them apart, and using them out of context to suit YOUR message!! ENOUGH! From here on out, they will be reported. TRY ME.

Wow, this is so childish. You are embarassing yourself. It is so hard to apologize to all the members you've
hurt with your statements?


Heidi, I wish you recovery, but I also hope you're not as negative in the future. It's doing no good to anybody. *shrug*

Allychan
April 6th, 2013, 05:24 AM
:couch:i This is why I seldom go back to read what people have to say about my posts, good grief I can only imagine

(but on a serious note hope Heidi gets better too)

cathair
April 6th, 2013, 05:27 AM
I am fairly new here, so perhaps I can put a little perspective on what this place is like for a newbie. I love science and it bothers me when I understand that things do work, but not why. It is very hard not to do things by guessing here, because firstly, the articles section of the website has been down for months. I thought, and please correct me if I am wrong, the articles were the place where you should start, with all the scientific information and evidence, then after that you could work through and read other people's opinions and then find what works best for you?

However the articles are still down, so a person cannot do this. All I can do is search the forum. When you are new how to do you know who's opinions to take on board? Well the only way I have found it to look at people photos and see how long their hair is. If it is longer than mine, than I assume they are doing things better than me. Otherwise, how do you know who's advice to take?

Also, when the articles are absent, how should I know what I should be learning? Everything that I look up is because I have thought about it and searched it. Or a thread title has caught my interest. Who knows what I have missed. I think I got to read through the articles once, before I joined the site, but since then I have not been able to refer back.

Does anyone actually have a back up copy of these articles, that we could upload somewhere for everyone? I would love to read them.

I have also found myself replying to threads, because of the drop in traffic on this site since the big crash. I constantly hear people complaining that their questions are not getting answered. I am no long hair expert, that is why I am here for help, but if someone is being ignored then I feel like I have to offer my help, even if my advice may not be the best advice. People need to be acknowledged, otherwise they think they have done something wrong and potentially leave. I have been in this position here on this site, but stuck though it. It's not nice, feels like the bottom of your stomach has walked off somewhere else. I may not have the hair I want, but my hair is longer than some of the shorter hair on here, so maybe I can help a little? If I am not sure why something works, or can't remember where I read it, I will let that person know so they can make up their own mind.

I understand no one has the time to constantly answer hundreds of hair questions every day and this is another reason I feel the loss of the articles section. I thought those at least everyone pretty much agreed on.

I have my own opinions about henna, I did write about them. But I felt like people would pick up on those, rather than my main point about the articles, which I feel is what is really missing from this discussion. No one is talking about how to eliminate some of this guess work, just finger pointing.

As an aside, I have massively enjoyed reading Heidi's posts. It is obvious to me how much time she has put in to answering people's questions and some of her have been some of the most concise I have read, whether one agrees or not. I would respect anyone who has made this much effort. It is clear what she does is working for her. I don't mind someone being to the point, if it is for the good of my hair. I would rather someone said it, I would rather know. I would personally be very sad if she stopped contributing her thoughts and opinions.

I am sorry to hear you have been in hospital Heidi. I hope you are being looked after well and that you recover as quickly as possible.

Suze2012
April 6th, 2013, 06:13 AM
I keep trying to post and deleting it.

I see all over the place on here that some things work for some people and some problems hey are and that some things don't work for some people and some problems they are having.
Isn't it all trial and error and a learning curve though?

This doesn't mean that I think the friend of mine who uses poo, a blow dryer, a straightener and has her hair highlighted shouldn't do any of that. she has done it for 20 odd years and her hair is BSL and is in fantastic condition. What she does would wreck my hair though.

I feel a bit of a fraud for being fairly new here and having posted about things which my hair likes or doesn't like.
I tried AVG but my hair doesn't like it - i am currently trying glycerin and at the moment my hair does like it (loves it in fact) but the comments about humidity and wet weather and how it might react then I have stored in my memory for if my hair suddenly reacts badly to the glycerin.


Being a newbie I did make one post which I now cringe at as the poster in question is waaay more experienced than myself (something I only realised a day or two after posting) and I reminded her to clarify before trying out co washing. She took it graciously but possibly rolled her eyes at my post...*blushing badly here* :) I think she twigged I was quite new though and was kind about it - and us newbies need a bit of that or we'd leave.

I hope you are feeling better soon Heidi, I had no idea at all before this thread of what ou have been going through - but also, if I didn't know this then other posters also possibly didn't know either. I also cannot comment on whether illness has changed the way you might have posted this as I am no expert at all but it should be said that any kind of posting on a forum can be taken in all different ways and none of us truly know what is happening in someone's life at the time of a post so all we have to respond to is the actual text in black and white.
A thread such as this will inevitably cause a reaction from those who use henna and find it works well for them.


I would have reacted if i had seen a thread suggesting that you must comb your hair - cos well - it doesn't work for me.A forum is for opinions (in my opinion) but stating something is a fact and generalising never works as we are all so very different. :)

physicschick
April 6th, 2013, 06:21 AM
I am closing this thread.