Coming to terms with my natural colour and late anniversary!

[NymphSpirit]

This thread is pretty much going to be me talking about my feelings about my hair and some story telling :b

When I was 12 I had decided my blonde hair wasn't edgy enough and therefore started changing it little by little, until the point this one friend of mine, whose hair is constatntly being fried and she loves it that way, told me I should stop beating around the bush and just bleach it. I don't resent her for that, she simply has different views on what beautiful hair is, and so did I at the time. I continued to dye it until about 1 year ago (can't remember when I stopped exactly) and I was sure I was going to be greeted by the hair colour I saw mostly in old pictures, but never once I considered those pictures were at least 8 years old, and I didn't really remember what my hair looked like when I first started dying it and like I started hating cameras once I turned 11 there was nowhere I could look.

This is what my hair looked like when I was 5ish (http://i1325.photobucket.com/albums/u636/lyra466/IMGP5488_zpse621e5df.jpg)

Of course I did not expect that to be the colour I was going to have but I never thought it could become this dark, after all, I had white hair for the first three years of my life!
After growing my natural hair for almost, if not, 1 year already I've finally realised it IS dark. For this whole year I've been making up excuses such as "It's just because it's winter" or "The bleached ends makes it look darker than what it is" and others -which I know to be true but not to the extent I was making them to be. Finally, yesterday, I was taking some length pictures to see if I had also reached waist with dry hair, when I took some time to actually watch my hair both in pictures and real life, and yeah... it's not what I'd usually call blonde. I wont stop calling myself a blonde because I've been one my whole life and my whole body hair is white anyways :silly: but I did come to terms that may be I'm not that blonde. It's weird. Do I like it? No, I hate it. Blonette hair is really beautiful -on others-. I don't like being in the verge of too dark for blonde but too blonde for brunette. I try to encourage myself, looking at pictures of dark blonde girls such as Dakota (http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lonyyjrZas1qljbqro1_500.jpg) - Rose (http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lqcsyhnVNC1qljbqro1_500.jpg) (who was the cause of my wanting to grow out my natural hair) and telling myself once the bleached part is trimmed it'll look better, but I'm still not happy about it. I wont dye until all the old dye is cut off, that's a little vow I made, but I'm really tempted to just order some henna and divorce "blonde" forever

Ahh, that was long, and now we reach an abrupt end :confused: (aka I need to save some brains for school)

And it's time for the photos, which is a little bit more entertaining :p

http://i1325.photobucket.com/albums/u636/lyra466/2marzo2013_zpse1681dbd.jpg

http://i1325.photobucket.com/albums/u636/lyra466/3marzo2013_zps1b483f0d.jpg

http://i1325.photobucket.com/albums/u636/lyra466/IMGP5090_zps9065c7bf.jpg
This is what my hair looks like in all natural light and Tequila photo bomb hahah

And now! Like I didn't make an anniversary post because I couldn't for the life of me take ONE decent picture of my hair, I thought I might just compress it all in one thread :)

This is from the time I had just joined the LHC, around DEC 2011, for comparison (I started growing my hair one year before that though).

http://i1325.photobucket.com/albums/u636/lyra466/julaicepillado_zps96fe7b74.jpg

http://i1325.photobucket.com/albums/u636/lyra466/julaisincepillar_zps41e2757e.jpg

And finally a texture photo with my hair au natural without braid/bun waves

http://i1325.photobucket.com/albums/u636/lyra466/julairulos_zpseaf4bb0f.jpg

Well then that's it. I feel better now that I could rant for a bit and share some pictures :b

Thank you for reading!

[Tota]

Amazing progress, congrats! And I lovelove love the ombre look you're got going on right now, it's beautiful! I wish you could see the beauty of your hair, it looks so luxurious and untamed at the same time!

[melusine963]

I'm another former blonde. It took me years to stop thinking of myself as blonde, even though I never dyed my hair, so the darkening happened gradually. It's only very recently that I've made peace with my current hair colour. I think your colour is lovely, and definitely still counts as blonde in my book. :)

[browneyedsusan]

Let's get one thing straight: your hair is drop dead gorgeous! Really!

Umm, are you in your twenties? I think it's normal for hair to change color and darken as we age. (Until we start graying, then it goes the other way!) My hair darkened from strawberry blonde to medium ash brown in my 20's. Every trace of red went away. I tried to like it, but felt ugly and weird without the red, so cut a teensy pixie and tried to like it. I ended up coloring, growing my pixie in natural, coloring, growing natural again, for YEARS! I discovered henna, and I love my hair now. It's still dark, but it's dark RED. It's okay to color it if it makes you feel better. It's your hair, and you ought to enjoy it!

[Kherome]

IMO you're not even "blonette" as you say. It's definitely brunette. Congrats on the growth and taking care of your hair. It looks good. Don't dive into henna until all the bleach is cut off or you might end up ronald mcdonald orange!

[door72067]

I guess color is in the eye of the beholder because I would call you "honey blonde"

whatever the color, your hair is really pretty

[kitschy]

You're blonde - no doubt about it! I like your texture and your color!

[door72067]

double post

[jacqueline101]

Your hair is pretty.

[WilfredAllen]

I love, love, love your hair colour. Dark blonde is my favourite hair colour. I love how yours looks against your red shirt in the last picture!!!

[spidermom]

Oh my goodness but I love your hair, including the natural color. I'd call it honey blonde, too. It's gorgeous! That last picture is my favorite.

Good looking dog, too.

[woolyleprechaun]

Definately still blonde to me :) Its pretty close to my natural colour :)

[Ocelan]

I know how you feel, except I'm the opposite. I have had the darkest hair in my family since early teens and I was so used to being the brunette one when others were blonde or "dishwater colored" (which I know now is blonette). So now that I've been growing my natural hair out for 15 months it's so light. In some lights it even looks blonde even though in some other lights it looks so dark. Blonette hair does that. So I just need to get used to being a brunette only every other day.

How I learned to appreciate my natural color came from what others said about the blonette color. You can't get it from any bottle. And even though in some parts of the world people think it's ordinary, in other parts people would do anything to get that color, but they can't. All the different shades that the hair takes in different lights is amazing. You never know if you'll look like a blonde or a brunette today.

What I must say is that you have one of the most beautiful blonette shades. It's medium darkness of a blonette but there's nothing dishwater about it. The warm tones make sure of that. It's like flowing honey with all those waves. Very pretty. And be sure that when summer comes and you stand in the sun, everyone will consider you a blonde. :)

[Kyaatje]

Oh my ! You do have beautiful hair. Come to terms with what you will, but I all I can say is that there will be a lot off envious people in your neighbourhood !

[Unofficial_Rose]

I'd call it honey blonde too. In my opinion it would be criminal to murder that pretty colour with henna. :twocents:

[SleepyTangles]

I'm my eyes you are definitively blonde. Not even what I usually label as "dark" blonde, yours its really a golden, honey-like hue. And it has such a depth, with all that natural lowlights and highlights.
Congrats on the growth, too!

[patienceneeded]

What a gorgeous ombre look you've got right now! And yes, I still think your color is blonde. Like the PP's stated, it's a honey blonde or perhaps a caramel blonde. Be happy with your color, it's stunning!

Also, love the texture of your hair, so wild and free, but still in control and defined. Lovely.

[ghost]

Your hair is lovely :) It actually has quite a bit of golden blonde in it to my eye, and it looks great with the lighter ends. It's definitely not mousy, dishwater blonde, or any of those other unflattering terms people like to use for blonette hair (which usually has more brown in it than yours, anyway!)

My hair was your color when I was swimming competitively and I loved it. When I stopped swimming, it grew in honest-to-god mouse brown and that's when I started having fun with hair dye.

[silverthread]

Your hair is ridiculously sexy! I love it.

[NymphSpirit]

Thank you all for the nice comments :o

It's really interesting to read how others who went/are going through the same hysteria when it comes to the dark blonde abyss feel about it, so thank you for sharing.

@Browneyedsusan I'm 18 really :) oh noes! I really hope it doesn't darken anymore! my heart wouldn't take it! :silly: and I'm secretly (well not really) quite curious about what my hair will look like with grays

@Kherome I did not think of that... it'd have been quite laughable :P

@Spidermom Thank you spidermom! And I'll be sure to let the vain lady know

@Ocelan That's an interesting point of view, and it is true, when it comes to dark blonde you never really know how it's going to react, and also the bit about not being able to get it from a bottle: do I know it! I tried dying my ends a year ago before growing them out and ended up with a horrible redish greenish thing... I can't really seem to be able to express it properly, but your comment gave this really nice feeling of satisfaction

And thank you once again, I really appreciate all the comments, they really did help in my little crisis :b

[cooklaezo13]

Your hair looks really beautiful. I envy your wurls!

My hair is a similar color to yours, and it has been quite the journey coming to accept, and eventually love, my natural hair color. I hennaed my hair for about two years. I ended up chopping from past hip to ear length to take out henna, and have been growing out my natural color since September 2011. If you henna, just remember it is very permanent! I got so tired of the upkeep with doing my roots with henna, and the color really didn't suit me as well as my natural light brown/dark blonde hue.

[Springlets]

Your story is the same as so many millions of others, especially on this site. I wish so many more women would take notice that nearly all of those who grew up with light blonde hair darken as they get older. The majority of blonde adults are dark blonde. If so many women didn't bleach their hair, you'd probably have a much better perspective for how light and golden dark blonde really is compared to others. And very few women have blonde hair that always appears blonde, no matter the lighting. Although my hair may appear light blonde in my avatar, it varies a lot with the light, so I consider myself to be blonette as well (albeit on the lighter side). Even if you look at the thread for blonde hair (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=108990&page=4&highlight=blonde), you can see many of our members whose hair can appear very very light blonde in one light and dark blonde in the next.

Also, as you grow out, hair gets lighter and warmer in tone (i.e. golden). My roots are now down to my shoulders (been growing out for about 2 years now) and I think most of the time my hair matches the bleached portions, or atleast looks like a natural gradient down. Anyway, cheer up and don't lose hope! Hopefully your hair color will *grow* on you. ;)

[cranberrymoonz]

Your hair colour is beautiful. Really.

[kidari]

The ombre thing you have going and your natural texture are INSANE (in the best way!) Loved your post and love your hair. Hope you don't make any rash decisions. It would be a shame to have gained all that progress to do something to the color that you end up hating and regretting. My first year on LHC I made it to barely waist and then bleached my ends and ended up having to chop back to BSL 6-9 months down the road. Change is difficult to get used to, but hopefully everything will work out for the best in the end!

[sunshine-locks]

I'd call that very light ash brown maybe? But your natural texture is so amazing, I am filled with curl envy! ♥.♥

[blondie9912]

I understand exactly how you feel. I have VERY similar hair colour to you, and I'm always trying to get it to get back on the blond side of things without more bleaching. Try honey lightening, maybe? It worked well for me to brighten my hair up a little bit. Also, I would really suggest a trim. I'm also growing out highlights (my demarcation line is around the same place as yours) and I was initially trying to grow my hair out with minimal trims, which I quickly realized was ridiculous considering how susceptible to damage my bleached length is.

Beautiful hair, though! :)

[missfaroe]

Wauv, your hair is SO beautiful! I really like your curls and the ombre effect! :crush:

[alexis917]

It's on the darker side of the blonde spectrum, but still definitely blonde to me!
And healthy looking!

[Maybe]

I would still call that blonde.
I actually box dyed my hair "Dark Blond" for years, it's so pretty.

Your texture is absolutely lovely.

[KittyBird]

That colour and those curls! Your hair is just sooo incredibly beautiful! :thud:

[spidermom]

Amazing how different the color can be through individual eyes. Somebody above mentioned "ash", but I don't see ash at all. To my eyes, your hair color is much warmer.

[gnome82]

Sorry accidental double post

[gnome82]

I think you have pretty blonde hair. I have family members that had blonde hair as a baby but as an adult ended up with a different colour. One ended up with auburn hair :D and the other had brown hair which over time has gone black with grey and silvers ;).

[Kittney]

Currently I am in the same boat. It is difficult to be blonde PERIOD for 20-ish years and then one day you begin questioning it. Wondering; "Those roots don't match....do they? Does anyone else notice? Is it getting brown? Maybe I didn't spend a lot of time in the sun this year?" and finally I said "If I am going to continue calling myself a blonde I must bleach it." I am at a cross-roads, next to the stark bleached line is a completely different color. This color isn't dark but it isn't bleach bottle blonde and I don't know how to feel about it but I can say for certain I really like the way it feels compared to my length...haha

My personal opinion would be that you have deeper honey colored blonde hair but it does not remind me of brunette.

[leslissocool]

Ok, I read through and saw the pictures. I know you don't want it darker and that you are having issues accepting it, but all I saw was how strikingly beautiful your hair is!

My goodness, you have the color I fried my hair to achieve long ago! I Loooove how dimensional it is, the texture and all. I can't help but think it's extremely exotic in a mermaid type of way, and braids would look amazing on you specially the intricate ones!

So, I just wanted to let you know that :blossom:.

[Annibelle]

Gorgeous color and texture!!! :thud:

[Yozhik]

Your hair truly is incredibly pretty - that color (blond)! That texture!

Stunning. :)

[NymphSpirit]

It's so weird, until I saw the replies saying my hair had more of a warm tone I was quite sure it was more on the ashy side, but after closer inspection it does seem to have more gold in it than ash, I'm so confused, all I thought my hair was is nothing but a lie! lol (either that or I immersed myself in benign neglect so much I can't even see it anymore)

@Kittney that's exactly what happened to me! after dying for so long, suddenly seeing a colour so dark coming out... except unlike you I fell in a denial phase that lasted a whole year :P

@leslissocool well, like one of the most overused phrases say : we always want what we don't have! And you literally melted me with the mermaid comment, I'm grinning like an over excited pug

[MaryO]

Oh my! Your hair is awesome! I love the texture and the length! Very nice! :-)

[Charybdis]

Hi, NymphSpirit! As someone with dark brown hair, I would call your hair dark blonde, especially because your eyebrows and the bits around your face (in the pic with the awesome dog photo-bomb) are relatively light. To my eye, you look like a blonde, but I do tend to see everyone who is not at least medium brunette or red-haired as blonde or at least blonde-ish.

Anyway, if you want my $0.02 -- don't henna your hair! Your natural color has a beautiful gold tone, and it really suits you. I'm not convinced red would flatter your skin tone nearly as much.

Also, I'd echo what everyone else says about darkening. Every once in long while I'll see an adult with really pale natural blonde hair, but it's extremely rare -- I probably see individuals with albinism nearly as often as I see super-pale blonde adults who are not albino. The color you have in the picture from when you were 5 is the color I had at about age 3 or 4, and I am unequivocally a brunette (and have been since about age 7). For an adult, your hair is what I'd consider blonde. And it's lovely!

ETA: Because I'm curious about all kinds of random stuff, I then went off and did some online reading about albinism. And I'm glad I did, because I learned something! I thought albinism always involved a more-or-less complete absence of melanin from skin and hair, but apparently this is not true. There are degrees of albinism depending on whether the person has the "ty-pos" or "ty-neg" variant, and "ty-pos" individuals still produce small amounts of melanin that cause them to have blond or even light brown hair, although they are still at risk of certain vision problems associated with albinism. So the adults I've thought of as "very pale blonde, but not albino" may in fact be people with "ty-pos" albinism. Good to know! Might explain why the husband of one of my friends, who is very light blond and burns with minimal sun exposure (he calls himself "a white bunny rabbit"), is also very nearsighted. OT, but interesting.

[palaeoqueen]

It's beautiful! A lovely honey blonde with no brunette in sight :)

[Firefly]

Very pretty hair. To my eye you're a blonde. Dark honey blonde, but still blonde!