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View Full Version : Had to cut my almost waist lenght hair to shoulder :,(



darkrose
March 23rd, 2013, 05:33 AM
I was an inch off waist lenght, I was so pleased that I had almost reached my goal. It had taken me 3 years from my starting point of a bob, and I was starting to experiment with buns and updos.
anyway, my hair sheds a lot so I went to see a trichologist to see if anything was wrong. She told me that my roots were healthy, but the reason I was "shedding" was that my hair was breaking. She also told me that the viviscal / silicon tablets were useless so I should through them out ( that's £70 down the drain) but then she told me I had to cut my hair to shoulder lenght, which she still called long. I was horrified and really upset, at shoulder my hair poofs and I look like a poodle. And I was almost at waist. :/ anyway, I called my hairdresser, and my usual hair dresser wasn't in. But if I waited, I knew I would never let my hair be cut. So I went and got my hair cut by a hair dresser I did not know. Big mistake. It took the hair dresser under 10 minutes to cut my hair, and she charged me £20 as my hair was longer than usual.
I got home and hated my hair, and after inspection I found that the right side was an inch longer than the left -..- this made me hate it even more.
Anyway, I phoned my usual hair dresser explaining that I was not happy, and she saw me earleir today and fixed my hair. To took her over 30 minutes. Im very grateful to her, she really is awesome
I know it's silly to cry over hair, but it's the only part of me that is remotely pretty, and I spent 3 years trying to get to waist. I really do hate it now, and it grows so slowly.
Does anyone have any suggestions? I can't put it into a bun, braid it or put it up ( just about goes into a ponytail) The only good thing is that it looks slightly pin up.
thanks for all your help over the past year.

ZenaZoo
March 23rd, 2013, 05:47 AM
But why were you told to cut to shoulder? Because of breakage? Alot of people have breakage and keep their length. Babying it and trimming to get rid of damage gradually.
I know its upsetting loosing length but why do it straight away because you we're told to?
Or am I missing something?
I'm a little confused, sorry =)
I hope fir a speedy growth spurt soon for you lol

Angelica
March 23rd, 2013, 05:47 AM
At shoulder length you can still put it into a French pleat which is a gentle hair style provided you use the right accessories to pin it. It can be done with just hair clips. I am so sorry about your bad experience. Why was your hair breaking? Did the trichologist explain that to you? I'm surprised that she said the viviscal tablets were useless, because I thought that was a well known and respected product. I think you need to find out why your hair was breaking. Perhaps you were using harsh hair accessories. Until I came to LHC I never thought about the "shedding" bit. Since I thought that was normal part of the hair cycle anyway, you lose hair that has reached the end of its cycle and new hairs sprout in return and I don't seem to shed a lot anyway (touch wood). I am sad this happened to you. :( But shoulder length hair is still pretty and you can wear nice updos.

darkrose
March 23rd, 2013, 05:53 AM
@zenazoo @anglelica I had to cut it too shoulder because I had breakage up the strange, so the hair was was breakear at around shoulder lenght. My mother wanted me to do it as fast as possible, thats why I got it done. Apparently the breakage was sun damage, which is understandable since I go to Florida a lot. Thanks for the advice of French pleats, I'll have to check that out. :)

darkrose
March 23rd, 2013, 05:54 AM
Strange? I meant strand. Sorry, autocorrect corrected me wrong. :)

Kherome
March 23rd, 2013, 06:00 AM
Hair is just hair and it does not define whether or not you are pretty. Hair does not make people pretty. Instead of focusing on the loss of your length how about you focus on the fact that you have now (presumably) cut off all the damage and you have the opportunity to do the right things to your hair this time so it doesn't end up damaged again? Fresh start, fresh ends. Next time you get to waist it can be undamaged if you protect it.

Angelica
March 23rd, 2013, 06:02 AM
Sun damage :( Please remember to protect your skin. I think there are conditioners or shampoos that you can purchase that protect hair from sun damage. Wearing a sun hat will also help :) I think Florida is beautiful, I've never had the chance to go. But the sun isn't kind on hair or skin unfortunately :) Your hair will recover in time and may return to waist length quicker than you thought possible if you baby it. Take care :)

Unzadi
March 23rd, 2013, 06:37 AM
Sounds like you really liked the near-waist legnth, so you know what to look forward to at this new stage of your growing journey. Losing a lot of legnth at once time, when one doesn't want to, can be traumatic, so it's normal and natural to be upset over that. On the plus side, as said before, you've got a chance to grow your hair out healthier this time. This time, your waist legnth hair will be even more gorgeous, because you have a chance to do it all over again, with better care/gentler accessories/more sun protection.

French pleats can be stunning, and this is a chance to play with styles that are trickier to do with longer legnths. Use this as playtime, and play up that pinup factor if that sounds fun.

Kaelee
March 23rd, 2013, 07:27 AM
Oh no. :( I think your trichologist was full of it and you should not have cut but what's done is done. I'm so sorry.

Now you have a fresh start though! :) that's the good news. So baby your hair, keep it well moisturized and protected. Wear a hat to protect from sun.

At that length I think claw clips and gentle pony elastics were my friend. I used to do a style where I would pony my hair in a half up, then pony all of it. It looked cool and made it easier to control the shorter hair. Happy growing! :D

Long_hair_bear
March 23rd, 2013, 07:58 AM
If someone told me to cut my hair, I'd look at them like they were crazy, like they just suggested I cut off my arm. I have some bleach damage still, but I'm very gradually cutting it off. Whats done is done and I'm sorry for your loss, but like omeone else said, at least you get a fresh start. :) Many of us don't get that. I'm sure you don't look like a poodle; remember that you are your own worst critic!

jacqueline101
March 23rd, 2013, 08:24 AM
I'm sorry for your loss. Why didn't you come here before the cut? You could micro trim and maintain until the breakage grew out.

Fethenwen
March 23rd, 2013, 08:41 AM
:grouphug: oh dear,

I'm so sorry this happened to you, but try to see it from a positive side.

Well, as your hair had a lot of sun damage and was prone to breakage, perhaps it was a good thing that you got a cut so that you can get a good fresh start. From now on you can be extra careful and protect it from sun damage. Wear a bun or some other protected hairdo when you are in the sun - especially on the beach - and wear a hat or scarf.

Try to give up lightening your hair or bleach, if you use it. Or protect the hair with coconut oil when dyeing your hair to minimize peroxide damage.

It will grow, in a year you will have APL length or longer :) And that is already long hair.

darkrose
March 23rd, 2013, 09:08 AM
I've never used bleach or anything like that (im too scared to )
What sort of updos can you do with shoulder length hair? I know there's French pleats. I've always wanted my hair to look rennaisance - y , is there any thing I can do to make look more like that?
And I should have come here first before I cut. :/ but at least it's extremely healthy now. :)

spidermom
March 23rd, 2013, 09:21 AM
Yup; it happens. I'm mentally preparing for a substantial hair cut. No matter what I do - and I've been a member of LHC for 7 or 8 years now and have good hair-care skills - my ends split and break and generally look destroyed. I examined my hair in a ray of sunshine for the first time in a long time yesterday, and I'm absolutely appalled by all the white dots and splits and scrunched-up looking hairs. I need to lose about 8 inches.

darkrose
March 23rd, 2013, 09:25 AM
@spidermom Im sorry you have to lose 8 inches *hug* what length will your hair now be? It looks stunning in your pictures. :)

GrowingGlory
March 23rd, 2013, 09:26 AM
I am having a similar experience. I decided to have all of the graduated breakage from my BBB cut off at once. I rough cut it myself and am waiting to have it professionally cut to a chin length blunt bob. I miss my hip length hair sometimes but am embracing all that is good about shorter hair. It does have its merits.

Naiadryade
March 23rd, 2013, 10:01 AM
I agree that your doctor might have been full of it... but what's done is done, and yes, focus on the positive! At least now the damage is gone, and you can grow it out so it's HEALTHY at waist-length! It's likely going to take some changes, though. Yes, there's protecting it from the sun, but chances are not all the damage came from just the sun. Thankfully, LHC holds the wisdom!

It's good that you haven't used bleach. What does the rest of your routine look like? What products do you use, and how often? Do you heat style or blow dry? Do you oil your hair? What have you been using to put it up with, and how often were you putting it up? When it's down or braided, how careful are you about things like not letting it get caught between your back and a chair? How gently do you detangle, and with what tool? How often were you trimming? Do you S&D? When in Florida, do you put anything on it to protect it before swimming?

I know personally, my hair suffers a LOT of damage if I don't baby it, moisturize it well, and S&D regularly. Some people are blessed with easy hair they can just forget, wash it with harsh things, dye, heat style, and it grows out healthy and beautiful. Others, well, it takes a little more care and effort to have healthy long hair.

darkrose
March 23rd, 2013, 10:16 AM
@naidryade I usually put it in two braids ( tied off with ribbon) or a bun that was done with butterfly combs. Washed it twice a week, shampoo and conditioner and oiled it every night. I used a silk sleeping cap and a BBB brush (detangling the hair first ) and I S and D it every 2 months or so. But my hair is like babies hair, it's so fine. It just looks thick because each strand likes its own personal space. I'm not entirely sure what else I can do for it apart from protecting it from the sun.

lapushka
March 23rd, 2013, 10:19 AM
What your trichologist said is total BS, IMO. The reason you're shedding is because your hair is breaking? Come on! It would have to be breaking at the root for that, which is near to impossible - just like that. But you cut your hair. You listened to her. Why, I wonder? But anyway... What's done is done.

You can try wearing it up a lot. A peacock twist is a nice way to wear it up.

itdontmatter48
March 23rd, 2013, 10:33 AM
I am so sorry! You said you had near waist length in 3 years? Sounds like you will have long hair again in no time. You tube has great hair-do ideas, short and long. Good luck and happy growing...

winship2
March 23rd, 2013, 10:34 AM
You say that you BBB it. Is it possible that you're one of the people for whom BBB is damaging? I know there are long-haired beauties here who swear by it, but there are others how find it shreds hair. Just a thought since it looks like you're doing so much else right :) Oh-- and you have good nutrition?

spidermom
March 23rd, 2013, 10:35 AM
What your trichologist said is total BS, IMO. The reason you're shedding is because your hair is breaking? Come on! It would have to be breaking at the root for that, which is near to impossible - just like that. But you cut your hair. You listened to her. Why, I wonder? But anyway... What's done is done.

You can try wearing it up a lot. A peacock twist is a nice way to wear it up.

My take on this is that OP thought it was shedding, but the trichologist pointed out that it was breaking off instead.

I think I'm going to keep most of my length but have a layered cut. I hate how my hair looks like a heavy cape blunt cut the way it is now. It's only pretty from a distance when I've recently combed it. I can't wear it down very successfully because it's all over the place and tangles like crazy.

darkrose
March 23rd, 2013, 10:38 AM
@winship2 yep, nutrition is good :) I'm not sure, it might be :/ maybe I should just try the de tanglling brush for the next month and see what happens... :/


the reason why I had to cut it at shoulder level was because it was breaking at shoulder level, and so it looked like it was shedding as so much was coming out. It wasn't actually shedding, the trichologist was right it had to be cut. Otherwise it would keep breaking.

Fantak
March 23rd, 2013, 10:41 AM
Oh hun I hope your hair grows really fast now that the breakage is undercontrol. When I realised my hair wasn't 'growing' due to breakage I started trimming and was amazed at how fast it really grew :) take a good multivitamin (prenatals are great) and get your iron levels and thyroid checked if you haven't already and you could be pleasently surprised in a couple of months :)

I also have to add that if that's you in your avatar you're really pretty!

darkrose
March 23rd, 2013, 10:42 AM
@fantak I'm getting my iron checked Monday, i have had problems with it in the past :s thank you, that's so kind! :)

Fantak
March 23rd, 2013, 10:44 AM
I second not using a BB on fine hair. It can be very rough on it and definately won't help the breakage.

darkrose
March 23rd, 2013, 10:49 AM
Oh ok. Is a tangle teezer the same as a BBB, will i get breakage from that too? I'm just wondering what I can use instead.

Naiadryade
March 23rd, 2013, 10:55 AM
@naidryade I usually put it in two braids ( tied off with ribbon) or a bun that was done with butterfly combs. Washed it twice a week, shampoo and conditioner and oiled it every night. I used a silk sleeping cap and a BBB brush (detangling the hair first ) and I S and D it every 2 months or so. But my hair is like babies hair, it's so fine. It just looks thick because each strand likes its own personal space. I'm not entirely sure what else I can do for it apart from protecting it from the sun.

Well, you're certainly doing a lot right! I agree that the BBB might be a big part of your problem... it can be really damaging for some people's hair. What do you detangle with? If your comb has seams that can rip the hair too. Also, what shampoo and conditioner do you use? Is it possible that your shampoo is too harsh for your fine hair, leaving it more fragile and prone to breakage?

Many people (myself included) have a point at which damage becomes more likely, especially when worn down or in braids, because that's where your hair starts rubbing chairs, couches etc. For me, that's APL-BSL, for some people it's not until waist, and for you it sounds like it's shoulder. As your hair gets longer again, if you put it in two braids (also a favorite hairstyle of mine) take extra care to pull it in front of your shoulders when sitting, driving etc--that might help.

Stellaaa
March 23rd, 2013, 11:09 AM
Oh ok. Is a tangle teezer the same as a BBB, will i get breakage from that too? I'm just wondering what I can use instead.

No, a Tangle Teezer is NOT the same as a BBB. It's a little plastic miracle, no boars or bristles involved. If I'd had one three years ago my hair would be at least twice as thick at length than it is now. I used to pull a small fist-sized ball of hair out of my brush daily. Now it's just a few hairs, normal shedding. No breakage. YMMV
(I HATE BBB's, they make my hair flat and then shred it)

winship2
March 23rd, 2013, 11:48 AM
Oh ok. Is a tangle teezer the same as a BBB, will i get breakage from that too? I'm just wondering what I can use instead.

I mostly just detangle with my fingers. In the shower, whether I shampoo & condition or condition-only, I carefully put the fingers of my right hand into my hair and then use my left hand to pull the sections of hair apart from each other. This gets the hair mostly in alignment (my hair is 1b), and then I move to combing my fingers through my hair. CO does really seem to reduce tangling at the ends once I'm out of the shower and "combing" it through with the blunt end of an old metal crochet hook-- NOT THE HOOKED END!! I only do that enough to get the hair strands all pretty much in the same direction. Then I let it dry and gently detangle and "comb" with my fingers as it dries, and maybe at the end gently comb with a wide-tooth comb, perhaps putting a tiny dab (size of a small grain of rice) of coconut oil in the ends to help it stay detangled.

I figure I always have my fingers with me and they are more sensitive to noticing a tangle as they run through my hair than any comb or brush could be. But a good wide-tooth comb does smooth the hair more effectively and helps it look sleek.

jeanniet
March 23rd, 2013, 02:08 PM
If your hair was breaking all the way up to shoulder, then you really did need to cut it. Trying to microtrim wouldn't have helped because the hair would still be breaking at the weak spots. Protecting it from the sun should help, and now that you have healthier ends you can keep a close eye on them so you know if damage is happening again. It sounds like you're doing things right for the most part, but fine hair can be hard to keep damage-free, and curly hair is hard, too. Just do your best to protect it. You might also want to look into condition washing rather than using shampoo. Many curlies prefer conditioner washing because it's more moisturizing.

darkrose
March 24th, 2013, 04:42 AM
I brought several massive hats to wear around Florida to protect from sun damage. And I have invested in a tangle teezer, hopefully my hair will grow healthy now. :)

SleepyTangles
March 24th, 2013, 05:29 AM
I'm sorry, I understand the frustration... but lets see this way: you'll grow it out to be even more beautiful, healthy and strong! And next time you'll never had to choose health over lenght because you'll have both. They look wonderful, by the way... the texture and colour is lovely.
:cheer:

Panth
March 24th, 2013, 09:15 AM
Another thing to consider: since you're going to Florida a lot, and judging by your avatar, is there any chance that it's BBB damage plus sun damage plus chlorine damage from swimming in pools?

Celtic Morla
March 24th, 2013, 10:36 AM
I only use metal comb to comb my hair and so does my Mum. I would do a thorough oiling the night before you wash and sleep on it, CWC detangle in th eshower while full of conditioner, rinse then let air dry, if your hair tend to have dryness oil lightly while still wet on th elower bit only.

darkrose
March 24th, 2013, 11:11 AM
I'm going to have to look into metal combs then :)
It's probabal the chorines damaging it too, I just bought a after swimming shampoo to try and fix it, but I might just put my hair up when I swim.

darkrose
March 24th, 2013, 11:11 AM
I'm going to have to look into metal combs then :)
It's probabal the chorines damaging it too, I just bought a after swimming shampoo to try and fix it, but I might just put my hair up when I swim.

Bagginslover
March 24th, 2013, 11:17 AM
Aren't metal combs damaging? I would have thought they'd be way too rough, especially on fine hair.

woolyleprechaun
March 24th, 2013, 11:26 AM
Aren't metal combs damaging? I would have thought they'd be way too rough, especially on fine hair.
I thought this too. Surely a Tangle Teezer would do the job? And maybe a horn comb or wide toothed wooden one?

Naiadryade
March 24th, 2013, 11:31 AM
Yikes, a metal comb sounds scary. Even if the edges were totally smooth, I would think the extra weight would pull through tangles more, causing more breakage. I only comb with my fingers--that way I can stop at every knot to carefully detangle it, instead of just ripping through. Oiling my hair lightly and putting it up when I'm doing really active things or sleeping keeps my hair low-tangle enough that finger-combing is realistic. I know this isn't necessarily possible with all hair types, though. Even if you use a comb, I would think a lightweight one would be better so you can respond more carefully to knots. And be sure it's seamless and smooth!

Many people will wet their hair with fresh water and/or oil it in addition to putting it up before swimming in chlorine or salt water. A swim cap is another thought, which could be used instead of or in addition to other methods, and shorter hair probably even makes that one easier. Also, I think I recall reading somewhere on here that you should follow a swim in chlorine with a chelating shampoo. Maybe read up on that one yourself.

earthnut
March 26th, 2013, 11:54 AM
With fine hair, I'd try protein treatments too. Protein is what hair is made of and helps strengthen the hair. Fine hair just has less of it than coarse hair, and so you may benefit from supplementing your hair with protein treatments.

GVP hair reconstructor is what I use, you can find it at Sally's Beauty Supply. Many conditioners also have protein, look for "hydrolyzed" in the ingredient list. You can use a high-protein conditioner as a protein treatment. Gelatin and liquid aminos are the most effective natural protein treatments, both found in the grocery store. Soy sauce, beer, coconut milk, milk, egg, and soy milk can all be used as protein treatments too. Coconut oil and other penetrating oils, though they don't contain protein themselves, help retain protein in the hair and you might want to use one between protein treatments.

For swimming in chlorine, I would apply coconut oil to my *dry* hair, do a quick rinse, go swimming, then use a 10% vinegar solution to rinse afterwards, finally rinsing well with water. Coconut oil helps to protect the hair from damage (you could use another penetrating oil too, or even conditioner) and acids like vinegar bind to and neutralize the chlorine. I don't think soaking the hair in water before swimming does anything. Oil is much more effective at protecting the hair.

Anabell
March 26th, 2013, 04:13 PM
I've never used bleach or anything like that (im too scared to )
What sort of updos can you do with shoulder length hair? I know there's French pleats. I've always wanted my hair to look rennaisance - y , is there any thing I can do to make look more like that?
And I should have come here first before I cut. :/ but at least it's extremely healthy now. :)
You also can do a gibson tuck, a french twist, a head band curls , a sock bun. If you have some time you can try the crown braid. You can also do cute twist that attach to your scalp and them grab them all to a pony tail\little bun. I take this idea from lilith moon:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yyrLlFWaO_U
And she also have this ones:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yyq2CoXDEiI
and this one great either:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2H4RNAm7aec

I'm sorry about your hair cut. Try not think about the length now, and focus on hair health and learn some new hairstyles. Now when your hair short, you can try all the kinds of complicated braids (four strand french, five strand french, diagonal,cornrows, crown braid...) and when your hair will grow longer you will be already expert in that.

Mesmerise
March 26th, 2013, 04:48 PM
Hmm I am sorry you had this experience. I really think you should have ignored the trichologist! You probably could have got away with a trim of 2-3 inches. But at least your hair IS healthy now and you've had a learning experience!! (And that's a good thing).

Of course, your hair will grow AND it will grow healthier if you care for it well! If it took you three years last time, at least you know how long it will take to grow your hair back this time. Also, shoulder length hair isn't so bad to style, because it's long enough to pull up! (And when you put it up you can sort of forget about it).

door72067
March 26th, 2013, 05:06 PM
my 2 pennies for the cauldron...in your avatar, your hair looks wurly/curly...brushing might not be the best road

if you do lean to the curly side, have you tried the Curly Girl method?

SerinaDaith
March 26th, 2013, 05:14 PM
In case nobody has told you come join us over at the shoulder to APL group. I promise we are friendly! We can all grow together from our various bad hair behavior.

marykatz
March 26th, 2013, 09:05 PM
I know it's silly to cry over hair, but it's the only part of me that is remotely pretty, and I spent 3 years trying to get to waist. I really do hate it now, and it grows so slowly.
Does anyone have any suggestions? I can't put it into a bun, braid it or put it up ( just about goes into a ponytail) The only good thing is that it looks slightly pin up.
thanks for all your help over the past year.

OK what do you mean remotely pretty, I am looking at your profile picture and you are gorgeous!!

As far as suggestions, I second the Curly Hair Method for your curls.

spirals
March 27th, 2013, 12:10 AM
I just wanted to lend my support, though I'm not great with advice for fine hair. I have some fine hairs, but most of it is generally indestructible. I guess the only thing I can tell you is that detangler spray is indispensible for curlies. I can't really comb or brush without it. My hair's strong, but goodness, I can't get a brush through it without oil or detangler, and that will snap it instantly.

Panth
March 27th, 2013, 03:43 PM
I'm going to have to look into metal combs then :)
It's probabal the chorines damaging it too, I just bought a after swimming shampoo to try and fix it, but I might just put my hair up when I swim.

I'm pretty sure the 'after swimming shampoo' won't stop the chlorine damage one bit. It'll only (maybe) chelate the chlorine etc. out, which would prevent the chlorine build-up from causing tangles and general unmanageability. So, it'd stop any damage caused by trying to comb through the tangly-ness. It wouldn't do anything to prevent the actual bleaching from the chlorine.

cobden 28
March 27th, 2013, 04:34 PM
I had to have my waist-length hair cut to level with my armpits in 2008. Before I'd had it cut I could tuck the ends into my waistband BUT I'd been in and out of hospital over eighteen months with stroke-related problems so hadn't been able to get into town for a trim for about eighteen months, resulting in the length but also A LOT of split ends. I was also growing out a fringe, which was down to bra-strap length.

When I was due to return to work, I needed to look smart, neat and professional so the only way to do this was to be drastic and have my hair cut to armpit-length, to get rid of my horrible split ends and the remains of my fringe. It took me four years to grow back what I'd had to cut off.

Now, back in December 2012 I decided on a change and had a fringe cut back into my hair - my avatar photo was obviously taken before I got my fringe back! - but I still have waist-length hair. And I make sure I take myself to a hairdresser every two months for a shampoo & blow-dry as well as a trim when necessary; I don't want to have split ends again!

Sometimes we longhairs just have to cut our hair short, whether to get rid of previous styling damage or split ends, but at least we are aware of how to keep our hair in good condition as we grow the length back again :)