I'm not liking hip and other hair frustrations (vent thread)

[goldloli]

I thought when I'd get to navel/hip length id really like it, but idk it's a weird length on me and not flattering. So I decided to just grow to bcl and maintain there. Except I have these hideous layers left and if they go un-trimmed for too long then they split and tangle and crumble. So I trimmed about 2 and a half weeks ago and have been S&Ding like a champ, minimizing handling and any other damage. I'm even finger combing only to detangle, which takes forever! It was all going great and i thought i could make at least 2 months without a trim.

I did my scheduled protein treatment but my mom had used up my moisturising follow up co. For the past 2 days until i could get to the shops, i've had to deal with over protein-ed, dry, tangled, extra big wavy hair. There's at least 50 new splits, plus i got really annoyed styling it today that i flat ironed it into submission (lowest setting :rolleyes:) which has no doubt caused more damage. So now I'm totally gonna need to trim :mad:

It's all heat damaged lame hair that needs 3/4 inches off to be fully awesome. Sadly im chasing length and if only my hair would just frikking cooperate, i'd be at my goal in a few months free to chop away those rubbish inches. It's no use going for the fresh cut either, since by the time they reach the same length they are equally as lame.

Tbh there's probably a foot of my hair that was exposed to frequent high heat and will crumble over nothing. It's gonna take forever to grow out. Still, it's encouraging to see all this thickness at the roots.

feel free to vent too or kill the thread. my cats sick, i dont like my hair today, im binging on cereal :/

[MidnightMoon]

Well I can't really help but I'm in the same situation. Mine is about hip length but I used to straighten it -in the highest temperature available- weekly for a couple of years AND dye it (imagine auburn, then black and then redish, which took 3 boxes of dye before lightening). So basically from BSL to my hips is frizzy, thin hair.
And the virgin hair feels so soft and a lot thicker :/
But I'm not going to lose length anymore (I once went from TB to BSL) so I'm just growing it out and recently tried to even my hemline which was like an inch of length loss in some parts where it had grown more but I guess i a couple of years it will be better :/

[goldloli]

I might just exclusively live in braids for a month or 2. Just moisturise, moisturise, humectant and damp bun. take out of damp bun, put in double braids, rinse repeat, oo look length! yeah wheres the updos challenge thread

[goldloli]

Well I can't really help but I'm in the same situation. Mine is about hip length but I used to straighten it -in the highest temperature available- weekly for a couple of years AND dye it (imagine auburn, then black and then redish, which took 3 boxes of dye before lightening). So basically from BSL to my hips is frizzy, thin hair.
And the virgin hair feels so soft and a lot thicker :/
But I'm not going to lose length anymore (I once went from TB to BSL) so I'm just growing it out and recently tried to even my hemline which was like an inch of length loss in some parts where it had grown more but I guess i a couple of years it will be better :/

it really is shocking isnt it, i mean how thick/soft the roots are compared. Even if we cut, it's gonna be the same problem till all that damage has grown out. What do u plan to do? does anything help with the damage?

[MidnightMoon]

I might just exclusively live in braids for a month or 2. Just moisturise, moisturise, humectant and damp bun. take out of damp bun, put in double braids, rinse repeat, oo look length! yeah wheres the updos challenge thread

Well I wear my hair up daily for work and it stays like that in college...then when I come home I just braid it for sleep :P.
Although I'm not sure not letting your hair dry is good, specially for your scalp, a lot of humidity might cause your skin to react negatively (at least in my case I feel like it ends up flaky or with some sort of build up).

[SoulOfTheSea]

I would keep trying all sorts of styles/styling methods/products until you find the right one! Do not give up! I finally found the right shampoo, serum, and styling technique for my hip-length hair that makes it the best it's ever been. Patience (although I know it is SO hard sometimes, especially on bad hair days) is absolutely the most important thing. Also looking at long hair motivation pictures keeps me happy when my hair isn't. :)

[MidnightMoon]

it really is shocking isnt it, i mean how thick/soft the roots are compared. Even if we cut, it's gonna be the same problem till all that damage has grown out. What do u plan to do? does anything help with the damage?

Well I think I'd rather live with the damage until it groes out. I really hated short hair, plus, in the second/third day after washing it looks decent of I don't move a lot haha. So the best option would be mantaining.
Perhaps we won't be gaining length but at least our hair will look much healthier and thicker.
And thicker ends help hair look longer since they're not as see-through as the damaged parts...

I think I'll be trimming my ends this year. I already did in February so perhaps 1 inch every 6 months or so will be good. I would cut 2 but I don't want to risk it knowing how much it takes my air to grow back :/

[dollyfish]

I would keep trying all sorts of styles/styling methods/products until you find the right one! Do not give up! I finally found the right shampoo, serum, and styling technique for my hip-length hair that makes it the best it's ever been. Patience (although I know it is SO hard sometimes, especially on bad hair days) is absolutely the most important thing. Also looking at long hair motivation pictures keeps me happy when my hair isn't. :)

I second this advice. Keep experimenting with your routine! Find your magical combo of products and wash methods :)
Growing out and getting rid of damage is the worst... I'm kind of in denial about mine and putting off the inevitable! But every time it gets me down, I remember that honestly, my hair is THE most malleable aspect of my appearance, and I have way more control than I think. No matter what, it'll grow back. I can always try something new. There will always be more hair! Patience...patience... Ah, patience is a virtue. At least, that's what I tell myself. I hate the wait!!

[Calaelen]

I have excellent success using the hair cutting chart on Morocco Method. The difference I get by trimming on appropriate cut dates is so huge, I recommend anyone with the issues you guys are having to give that a try. I would never return to random trimming. I'm currently impatiently waiting for this months cut days to trim off several inches that were destroyed during recent illness/ hospital stay. If I didn't know how quickly the regular trimming on those dates would help, I'd be so lost right now.

[hanne jensen]

Goldoli, have you considered microtrimming?

[chen bao jun]

Well, I hope one day to have your problem! I currently have shoulder length hair (it's more like can-I-call-shoulder) when its curly, about armpit length stretched with the same issue--bottom four inches are in very poor shape from pre LHC treatment and I'm not ready to cut them off. I'd only have ear length hair if I did! I S & D, dust about every four months (I do it myself, do not trust hairdressers) and find my ends do better if I religiously pretreat before my weekly washing (I do an SMT) under the hair dryer; protein treatment jsut on the ends every time and keep my hair up most of the time, using hairstyles I can leave in for 2-3 days so the ends don't get touched a lot. But its frustrating to see and feel the difference between the damaged ends and the hair in my bangs, where the 'bad' hair was cut off and all the hair feels great! I am trying to get to bra strap and then I will cut back to armpit, which should get rid of the damage. Then I hope to keep trying to get my hair as long as yours.
Your photo looks great by the way, so it's not a visual thing.

[torrilin]

I might just exclusively live in braids for a month or 2. Just moisturise, moisturise, humectant and damp bun. take out of damp bun, put in double braids, rinse repeat, oo look length! yeah wheres the updos challenge thread

I pretty much braid or bun straight from the shower most of the time, and my hair hasn't been hit with heat for years and years :). It's so fine and delicate and floaty that I find it's a lot easier to deal with up. Not damp bunting or braiding, but flat out dripping wet bunning or braiding :D. A lot of the time the only "drying" I do to my hair is the twisting I'd do to bun it, or squeezing my braid(s) with a towel after they're done.

There's also a ton of pretty updos you can do with 2 braids, whether you do 'em side by side or in a vertical stack.

[spidermom]

I remember when I couldn't wait to get to waist length; I was so excited. When I finally got there, I didn't like it. So I know the feeling. I still want to have at least classic length hair, but my ends keep getting trashed out. There's not a lot more I can change in my hair routine.

[lunalocks]

Goldoli - join the 30 day wear your hair up challenge. Rotate you updoes and don't think about your hair. It was good for me and my hair and is protecting my fragile ends. I am growing out "wearing ponytail while aerobic dancing for a year" damage. I am S and D ing about every week. I am at hip and just started really having bad splits at this length. I'm going to try to get to TB then maintain til all this damage is past.

Baby oil on damp hair after washing and every night before bunning has done wonders for my ends.

[UpNorth]

I have the same problem, but bleach damage! my hair is so near hip but I need a 2 inch cut to get rid of an uneven hemline and some of the damage, and I really want a blunt hemline leaving me no choice but cut at least 2 inch and then mantain. But I want longer hair and I don't really like this length either. I spent 50 minutes (I took a walk at lunch) thinking about this!

[jacqueline101]

I like the trim by moroccan method.

[goldloli]

Woah, so many replies. I was so upset with life in general yesterday and needed a hair rant.

Thank you for suggestions but sadly this isnt a routine or products issue, nothing is going to make me like hair at hip because it just makes me look kinda fat and frumpy. I think it's because it's still a tad triangleish whilst also detracting from my waist. Or maybe I just have some serious hairexia. Yes I've been microtrimming for 8ish months now but I wanted to not trim and just grow some for once. Today I looked at my hair and saw it was at butt dimples again, I plan to hold off trimming for a month or 2 as planned.


I remember when I couldn't wait to get to waist length; I was so excited. When I finally got there, I didn't like it. So I know the feeling. I still want to have at least classic length hair, but my ends keep getting trashed out. There's not a lot more I can change in my hair routine.
Yes all of this! It sucks! I've seen you post about trimming back and splits and whatnot but obvi to us your hair looks fine, so I had wondered why you did so much trimming, but I guess if your hair is behaving like this then I totes get it. My hair doesn't look bad in the slightest, but i know that damage is there plotting to destroy my lengths one tangle at a time.


Goldoli - join the 30 day wear your hair up challenge. Rotate you updoes and don't think about your hair. It was good for me and my hair and is protecting my fragile ends. I am growing out "wearing ponytail while aerobic dancing for a year" damage. I am S and D ing about every week. I am at hip and just started really having bad splits at this length. I'm going to try to get to TB then maintain til all this damage is past.

30 day challenge it is! see there's always an answer at lhc!

[torrilin]

Yeah, I find wearing it up fixes a LOT for me :D.

[ghost]

Do you think conditioner-only washing might work for you, as far as getting the ends of your hair to feel better? My hair is in between waist and hip, which is an awkward length for me because it seems to take even more mechanical damage than it did when it was at tailbone.
CO washing and then sealing with oils or shea butter is pretty much the only thing that makes a difference in reducing damage to my ends. Aside from that, I'm just bunning during the day and sleeping with my hair in a braid while I wait for my hair to grow.

[HintOfMint]

I'm sorry about the damage you have to grow out, but I thought I'd chime in about hip length. Hip was my original goal, but when I got there, it was really awkward on me. I couldn't put my finger on it as to why. I left it alone for a while and grew to tailbone/vertical smile length and FINALLY it became flattering. It's amazing how just a few inches makes such a difference.

[goldloli]

Do you think conditioner-only washing might work for you, as far as getting the ends of your hair to feel better? My hair is in between waist and hip, which is an awkward length for me because it seems to take even more mechanical damage than it did when it was at tailbone.
CO washing and then sealing with oils or shea butter is pretty much the only thing that makes a difference in reducing damage to my ends. Aside from that, I'm just bunning during the day and sleeping with my hair in a braid while I wait for my hair to grow.
Naww co washing was a bust, it over hydrated my hair (stretchy) for approx 18 hours post wash then hair reverted to its usual dryself by the following day because its so porous(curl type + heat induced), moisture just runs away. Also co makes me shed and my strands like being residue free to limit tangles. I'm having much better success with shampoo then double condition, then cold rinse. To be honest I bring the damage on myself by wearing hair down 98% of the time. This wouldn't be a problem if I were maintaining but when you're chasing length it's counter productive to keep trimming mechanical damage.

I'm sorry about the damage you have to grow out, but I thought I'd chime in about hip length. Hip was my original goal, but when I got there, it was really awkward on me. I couldn't put my finger on it as to why. I left it alone for a while and grew to tailbone/vertical smile length and FINALLY it became flattering. It's amazing how just a few inches makes such a difference.
Yeah It's such a bizarre length! I swear it's given more hassle than any other by not laying right, tangling more, looking flyaway and poofy yet heavy enough to stretch out my curls to limp sad looking things. Also because its not long enough to weigh down the ends, they kinda poof out at waist making me look fatter. it's okay though i've found solace in the updo challenge shall just braid it out of sight until its past this nasty little stage. My pigtail braids are waist +, so I think bcl is only 2 months away. I sincerely hope that when some of you get to hip, you really enjoy it :)

My cat didn't die btw :o