Frizz -- at my wit's end

[hairhair]

I'm so upset because I'm starting at a new school in two weeks, and no matter what I do (products, cuts, CO, etc) my hair is a frizzy mess and looks like I don't take care of it.

It's never been permanently dyed and I blowdry at most once every 2 months. It's been straightened/curled a couple of times -- maybe twice last year, and a few more times the previous year, but no more than a few times a year and never on any sort of regular basis. The baby hairs around the temples have grown out since I stopped brushing it wet (well, brushing it at all), but all over my head there are short, extremely fine, curly hairs that stick up over my otherwise pencil-straight hair. And at least some of them are less than 3 inches long -- I stopped brushing over 6 months ago so that's not the problem.

There must be at least 10-20 of these hairs in every palm-sized bit of my hair, from roots to ends.

I'm tempted to cut it and perm to make ALL the hair curly. Obviously I want to grow, but I like the look of short, curly hair too, so it would definitely be my second choice if all frizz-fighting fails. This would be a pretty expensive and inconvenient option to maintain, but I guess it could work long-term if I kept the hair short so it never got too damaged.

However, due to my goal of growing long hair I thought of some other possible solutions to try first:

1. Go back to cones. I'd be willing to try this, but would it involve going back to sulphate shampoo too? I imagine if I didn't, this would lead to build up.

2. More oiling.

3. CO -- this really has not worked for me; I've tried twice and it's impossibly greasy within days, despite vinegar rinsing.

Does anyone know which of these might work, or can think of anything else to try? Thanks! :)

[biogirl87]

hairhair, I used to have this before, but in the past couple of weeks while changing routines at certain intervals the problem seemed to fix itself for me. I haven't tried oiling and only tried CO once (hair was greasy almost right after drying). About cones: if you choose amino silicones (amodimethicone or bisaminopropyl dimethicone) they are not supposed to build up as fast. However, for some reason they weighed down my hair, which is why I went from using conditioner after every shampoo wash to every third or even fourth wash. If you go with Herbal Essences S/C, it is said to actually live up to its name and straighten your hair.

[spirals]

More oiling and flax gel. It's cheap, easy, and can be made into a spray moisturizer. You can simmer 1 tablespoon of seeds in 1 cup of water for 5 minutes and strain the seeds out. Add enough water to make a sprayable gel. If you want to keep it at room temp, preserve it with 1/2 teaspoon of citric acid or 1 tablespoon of vinegar per cup of spray. You can also add a few drops of oil and/or glycerin. It acts as a detangler for me as well as a frizz-calming spray.

[furnival]

all over my head there are short, extremely fine, curly hairs that stick up over my otherwise pencil-straight hair. And at least some of them are less than 3 inches long -- I stopped brushing over 6 months ago so that's not the problem.
The fact that your frizz is made up of curly hairs and your hair is naturally pencil-straight made me think of pili torti. This is a condition characterised by a certain amount of twisty, brittle hairs. http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=47312

[Mya]

My mama has the same problem and solved it with aloe vera gel. Anyway... It's just a matter of time (some months) for your baby hairs to grow longer and blend with the rest of your hair. Don't use a permanent solution for a temporary problem!

[WaitingSoLong]

Cones are not that bad! I use them religiously and do not have splits. However, cones do not help the halo from baby hairs.

NOTHING does.

Only if my hair is sopping wet or oiled extremely will they stay down but the resultant look is horrid.

My hair is straight as you can see from my sig pic but my baby hairs are curly, especially at the nape, I actually get some corkscrews that look cute when they are about 6" long. I don't have that pili-torti condition. My hair is not brittle.

I would recommend a serum of some kind or rose-water glycerine spray (I get mine at a local health food store). I cannot recommend a serum because the one I use is discontinued. I bought 5 bottles so I have about a lifetime supply LOL.

If you are up to it you may consider water-only. I think this is the ultimate best for hair but I cannot tolerate it myself.

[bunnylake]

I had a major frizz problem and tried everything and nothing worked EXCEPT THE TANGLE TEEZER. One brush through and I have nearly no frizz at all. I don't need to add product or anything after that.

[hairhair]

Thanks for the suggestions everyone! :)

Mya, I don't think it is baby hairs, as many are shorter than 3 inches, which is my growth over the 6 months since I stopped brushing. Thanks for the aloe vera suggestion! I only tried it once, attempting to make the gel myself from my plant, which didn't work long enough for me to see any results. I'll have to try again... would it be okay to use that 99.9% pure aloe vera gel they sell for sunburn? I don't imagine the preservative would be too scary as it's for skin after all.

I used silicone-y conditioner and I think it's slightly less frizzy; the scalp halo is still pretty nasty but all my hair isn't trying to leap sideways out of my braid today! Another advantage of cones will be that I like to use those conditioning temporary dyes, which I think help with frizz, but my silicone-free conditioner washes them out instantly.

I'll also try the tangle teaser idea!

[katiebeans]

I used to always get frizzies very similar to what you are describing. They were horrible years ago when I was in middle school and have since eased up. At first I was using a product from Garnier Fructis called smoothing milk or something (it worked miracles for me), so if you try cones you can look into that. Another alternative that I eventually switched to was aloe vera. I have a plant in my house so I would squeeze some gel right out of the leaves.

[GrowingGlory]

NightBlooming Triple Moon Anointing Oil works well for me.

[jacqueline101]

I like moroccan oil for my friz.

[hairhair]

Wow, thanks for all the advice. I did another heavy oiling followed by silicone conditioner wash, then combed some aloe gel (from the plant) through towel-dried hair. It's still drying but looks less frizzy this time around! The length is quite frizzy but I didn't really work much aloe gel into that; I was focussing on the scalp frizz, which seems to be much improved.

:D I'm so excited! Thanks so much everyone!

[nobeltonya]

I oil at night, wash every morning [with loads of conditioner and use leave-in], comb wet and wet bun for several hours... that seems to help control my frizz. And my hair was pretty frizzy before I started this routine [like 2 years ago]. :disco:

[torrilin]

Mya, I don't think it is baby hairs, as many are shorter than 3 inches, which is my growth over the 6 months since I stopped brushing.

Well, yeah. You shed out hairs that are done growing every day of your life, and you start growing new hairs as follicles that shed out hair reach the end of their resting phase. Humans do not (thank GOD) blow out their hair the way a lot of animals do, so that most of the hair sheds all at once and seasonally. I'd hate being seasonally bald! The tradeoff for not being seasonally bald tho is we are constantly growing tiny new hairs.

Also, the terminal length of the various hairs on your head will vary. Near my hairline, I have some hairs that are terminal at maybe 5mm, others at 3" or 6" or 12". Most of my hair grows a lot longer than that of course, but some hairs will always be short. It doesn't mean I'm doing anything wrong or causing damage or breakage. It's just a natural part of having a hairline. If I ever had all hairs at terminal, we could do a nice bell curve chart of the range of hair lengths over my head :D. It's very rare for natural things to develop in a uniform way, and hair length is no exception.

Like WaitingSoLong, I have straight hair and a lot of my shorter hairs are curly. I can't remember if she and I have similarly dry scalps or not... but my scalp is really dry. I find it's best to steal my hair care ideas from the curlies and super curlies, and then modify the quantities down to suit my hair being straight. Diluted shampoo, just washing the scalp, using gentle detergents and washing the minimum possible all help. Also using lots of conditioner that's suitable for use on both wet hair and as a leave in. To get a maximally perfect look, I go full on curly style with conditioner to detangle, then leave in, then curl creme, scrunching dry in a towel, and then gel scrunched in. I use an alcohol free, silicone free gel, because I find aloe gel doesn't seal my hair very well, but if aloe gel works for you, go for it. Since my hair is straight, this doesn't actually give me curls (tho since I'm a 1c, I can achieve a look that almost is as wavy as a 2a who did nothing special to her hair). But it does mean that my hair dries in a very smooth way and it stays looking like a perfect blow out for several days.

I react badly to a lot of different fragrances, and it's hard to find fragrance free styling products, so I don't really muck about with serums and such. It's also not easy to find silicone heavy conditioners that are fragrance free. It's not that 'cones are bad or unhelpful for this, just I don't really have the option.

[hairhair]

It really seems to be settling down now! Torrilin, I might just try diluting my shampoo! It does seem to be a real issue, because my scalp is often the frizziest, and does seem worse after shampooing. But as mentioned, CO doesn't work so I can't go entirely without shampoo either. I'm wondering if it could be something in this specific shampoo, though since I've switched to using another (same brand but different version; contains coconut oil) it doesn't seem to be as bad. But I started this one at the same time as resuming silicone so it could be either or a combo of both that's causing the improvement.

[Sharysa]

In addition to damp-oiling after a shower, I found that another oiling on at least half my length when my hair's dry has MAJORLY cut down on frizz after just a week. When I used commercial shampoo, less/diluted shampoo DEFINITELY helped deal with frizz.

I eventually found out that I have an oily scalp but dry hair (which is common for a lot of Asians), and so I decided to shampoo my scalp but condition and oil the length. (And now I'm making my own shampoo, ha.)

Glad to hear that something's improved your hair, whatever it is.

[rowie]

It really seems to be settling down now! Torrilin, I might just try diluting my shampoo! It does seem to be a real issue, because my scalp is often the frizziest, and does seem worse after shampooing. But as mentioned, CO doesn't work so I can't go entirely without shampoo either. I'm wondering if it could be something in this specific shampoo, though since I've switched to using another (same brand but different version; contains coconut oil) it doesn't seem to be as bad. But I started this one at the same time as resuming silicone so it could be either or a combo of both that's causing the improvement.

I've now started using natural aloe vera gel whenever I use cones. This works well if you are doing that sleeked back hairstyle when you are bunning hair. I try to avoid serums because they accelerate build up faster for me.

[katiebeans]

I am happy to hear that you are seeing improvements :) I thought of some more advice that might be useful, though it may have been mentioned already. I have heard that using a cotton t-shirt instead of a towel to dry your hair reduces frizzies, as well as sleeping on a satin pillow case or wrapping your hair in a satin scarf when you go to sleep. I haven't tried either of these, but I just brought a satin pillowcase and plan on using it from now on :)