Haven't been here for a while...so frustrated right now!

[aliceinmadness]

I apologize first off for having a severe case of forum ADD and not commenting here in quite a long time (though I do check in and lurk every now and then).

Anyway, I've been maintaining in the range of waist to tailbone...in other words it gets to my tailbone, gets to be too fussy and then I whack it to my waist and let it grow again, which, retrospectively, happens pretty fast. I also had a fallout problem around this time last year which I've since then managed to correct.

Right now, I'm so frustrated with it that I just want to cut it straight to APL or BSL. The regrowth from the fallout makes the hair near my roots super thick...the ends I have heavily layered and slightly thinned to cut down on weight, so my length is all over the place. The other thing is that I did...unspeakable...things to my hair (especially recently) and I have a ton of breakage and splits, some of which going quite far up the shaft. Search and destroy is just an uphill battle at this point. I'm sure my ends are really uneven, not to mention that the layers are wrecked. The silly part is that it doesn't even feel dry. I still have plenty of slip and elasticity, but it tangles mostly at the ends where my hair is frayed. It's fine up until I hit the break point.

Logically I know I just need a series of good trims and to back off the heat a bit more (I do heat style it about twice a week)...but ever since I came to grips with the fact that I just don't have the hair type to support the hair I was obsessing over...which was obviously made of extensions anyway...I've just been annoyed and depressed by my hair, even when it looks great. And frankly, right now, I'm ashamed to see my hairdresser.

I think I just need a good cry :'( I'm completely goal-less right now and just don't know what to do.

[Sylvestrix]

I've totally been where you are, and I'm so sorry you're so sad about it! Hugs for you. I think even though it can be hard, the best things to remember is that at the end of the day, if you're not enjoying your hair, you don't owe it to anyone to keep putting up with it.

Maybe a good trim is what you need- I chopped from waist to APL to get rid of a hemline and layer situation that was driving me natty, and even though it's a long journey back, I've never regretted it because now I can enjoy my hair in the inbetween time =]

Also? Don't be ashamed to cry about your hair. I've done it before, and it can be totally theraputic, and might just help you come to a decision- once you get some of the sad out, it's easier sometimes to see what you want to do <3 Chin up!

[turtlelover]

Longer does NOT necessarily mean prettier in my eyes. I'd rather see APL hair or even shoulder length in good condition than longer hair that is ratty looking and damaged. I say cut off some damage and start over, and please don't feel bad about it. To most of the world outside of LHC, your hair will still seem long-ish.

[Madora]

Perhaps you would feel better with your hair's image if you cut it to mid back, then continued to baby it and handle it gently. I agree wholeheartedly with turtlelover's post.

[aliceinmadness]

Thanks guys. Always good to be reminded that the universe won't collapse into a black hole if I cut it off.

Here's a picture to give you an idea: http://instagram.com/p/VKnRuED-M0

You can see the ends are uneven and I have bits sticking out from where it broke off...but it's still shiny and more or less healthy looking aside from the overall unevenness. I need a new hair dream. It's hard to make a rational decision or weigh tradeoffs about anything when I don't even know what I want it to look like.