What do you still struggle with?

[TheLuckyLurker]

I'm sure we all have a hard time with things like patience, or accepting our hair for what it is, but I mean more... nuts and bolts type things.

For myself, the thing I still have some trouble with is treating my hair gently. I mean, it's fine to say "treat your hair like antique lace", but since I've never actually handled antique lace the advice doesn't really do much for me. I had to learn the hard way that it means take your time, and work carefully, whatever I'm doing with it. Since my tendency is to hurry up and get it done... Yeah. It's still far too common to feel a sharp tug, or wince when I hear a snap, but I'm working on it.

So, do any of you still have trouble with some aspect of caring for your hair the right way?

[Natalia]

I benign neglect by default and while its not bad for my hair it does need more attention even if its just a DT once a month. How is it i cant get my lazy but do do something 12 times a year!?!? I stil have length that has been dyed that really needs it but even my virgin hair is a bit dry and would look better with some tlc. I have such fine/thin hair i need to be able to maintain the thickness i have or my ends look like yarn the cat got into.

[Mairéad]

Sometimes I whack at it hard with the comb still. I was really good this morning though. Last time I was growing out I had virgin hair and it didn't tangle much. This time I have chem dye so my hair is drier and tangles a lot more and I have a lot more "halo" hair from shedding.

[10000days]

For myself, the thing I still have some trouble with is treating my hair gently. I mean, it's fine to say "treat your hair like antique lace", but since I've never actually handled antique lace the advice doesn't really do much for me. I had to learn the hard way that it means take your time, and work carefully, whatever I'm doing with it. Since my tendency is to hurry up and get it done... Yeah. It's still far too common to feel a sharp tug, or wince when I hear a snap, but I'm working on it.

Me too! I've made a conscious decision to be slower and gentler when combing or styling my hair. It's difficult though, when there's just so much knotting. I've tried to use my hands more rather than combs- I'd say this has helped cut down on the tugging, snapping and tearing!

[maborosi]

Stretching my washes. I bought some more dry shampoo to help me out on that, but it's really difficult. I'm not even using cones right now, but between my job (I can get kinda sweaty sometimes), the hard water, and having straight hair that's naturally prone to oiliness, it is so hard to go very long without shampooing. :(

I also only just recently learned to French braid. I was so freaking proud of myself when I first did it correctly. I am not exactly the braid-master.

~maborosi~

[spirals]

My struggle has always been accepting that my curls will never do the same thing from day to day. It frustrates me that on a day/night when I have nothing to do, I have bouncy, moisturized spirals, and on a day when it needs to look good, it's all dry, lank right angles.

[Islandgrrl]

I find that I struggle to find a balance between benign neglect and really neglectful neglect. I'm pretty lazy about my hair and sometimes I realize that I haven't detangled it for a week or two. Of course it's been cleaned during that time, but I've pretty much just whipped it up in a bun and ignored it.

Maybe not the best plan.

[truepeacenik]

Lol, no washing in the tangles will get you!
So, yes, I've done that.
My biggest issue is braiding at night. I should,I don't, therefore I have spent years in the tailbone to classic trim to thicken ends ring of growing hell.

[Alexblue]

My struggle has always been accepting that my curls will never do the same thing from day to day. It frustrates me that on a day/night when I have nothing to do, I have bouncy, moisturized spirals, and on a day when it needs to look good, it's all dry, lank right angles.

I hear that! :-)

I also struggle with gentle combing. I only use my fingers or comb...and try to go slow to work out the tangles. But some mornings you really just need to get out the front door.

oh the sound of snapping hair sends shivers down my spine. shudder:

[shutterpillar]

I struggle with not using heat styling tools... particularly the blow dryer. I do rarely use them, but it's hard when I see all these people out and about who regularly style their hair so it's just perfect. I love my hair, but it's at an awkward stage right now with growing out my bangs and layers and it would be SO much more manageable if I could heat style it whenever I need to.

I just have to keep in mind the damage that I am avoiding by hanging in there for another year or so until I can cut the remaining layers out of my hair and my bangs grow out more.

[Coolcombination]

I struggle with stretching washes and it's set to get worse in the summer when I start horse riding and working more(McDonald's=greasy hair).
It'll go like this
Day 1- wash hair
Day 2- work
3-work, wash hair
4- horse riding
5- horse riding, wash hair
6- work, wash hair
7- going out =styling products, wash hair

[jeanniet]

Length vs. ends. I really don't enjoy my hair if my ends feel tattered--even though, to be honest, they're really not that bad. I can put up with a small number of splits, but more than that and the feel of my ends really bugs me. I'd like to get to classic, and I'm sure I could grow that far, but I don't think I'd be happy with my ends. Right now I'm hovering just above hip with very few splits, and I'm much happier with those ends...but it's not classic.

[Naiadryade]

I struggle with putting my hair up and leaving it alone. I know my hair, which is full of split ends, would benefit hugely from wearing protective updos most of the time... but I just really love wearing my hair down and free! For me, it wouldn't really be worth having long hair if I didn't wear it down most of the time... which is an annoying catch-22. I braid it at night and braid or bun it when I'm doing really active things, but other than that I mostly leave it down, where it inevitably gets more damaged... I also have a tendency to touch and play with my hair a lot, which I know doesn't really help.

[Tota]

I struggle with airdrying in the winter. We are trying to save some money so we don't have the heating on very often. It's not freezing cold or even close to that but it sucks when my hair is wet.

[Oksana]

I struggle with...accepting that my hemline won't always be perfect. I have spent the last year obsessing over my hemline; wanting it blunt and thick. This has encouraged me to be way too scissor happy and not gain the length I want to.

[Iolanthe13]

I probably wash my hair too often - almost every day. I do blow-dry it occasionally, but on low heat and not for long. I think the washing is probably doing more damage...

Also, I need to stop trying to trim my own layers. I can't see them, but they undoubtedly look ragged and weird.

[Chromis]

I braid every night. I have done this starting shortly after I joined and it did a world of wonders for reducing tangles. I have not gone to bed without braiding my hair for years now because it works so well. I really ought to know by now how long it takes although I've never bothered to time it. I often find myself though just about to go to bed, only NO, must braid my hair still! Then I have to pause and braid and braid before I can go to bed. WHy don't I think of these things earlier? I like to lay out clothing the night before and brush my teeth before bed and then it turns into this whole extra half hour before I can sleep. :brickwall

Planning ahead...I think I am doing it wrong!

[vamq]

I'm still struggling with the fact that my hair is different every day or season. Before LHC, I thought my hair was just straight with a gigantic frizz-tendency.
I turned out to have 1c/2a hair, and my hair is on the 1-side during winter, and the 2-side during summer.
I found out that somehow, I am much better at handling the 2-type. I like the look of it better too.
It's so bad that I truly start to dislike my hair during the winter!

For example today: my hair is almost stick straight, flat on top, only the bottom is slightly wavy, and I can't get it to look nice.
It annoys me to no end!

[Long_hair_bear]

I struggle with not getting frustrated about the tangles around chin length. For some reason, my hair likes to tangle all the way around my head at that level. I try to be patient and finger comb it out.

[ghost]

I struggle with trimming vs no trimming. I want my hair to look longer as quickly as possible, but I also want a more or less blunt hemline. I used to trim every 2 months and I've been trying to stretch it to every 3 months and no more than half an inch, but whenever I get to my set date I agonize over whether or not to actually trim.

[einna]

I could spend more time combing my hair gentler... Also, in the afternoon I have a tendency to take down my hair under the pretence of doing a scalp massage. I put it up again a little later, then take it down again and so on.... I need to just leave it alone.

[jacqueline101]

I struggle with being impatient and I forget at times that my hair needs extra help it drives me nuts so I get a little rough with.

[minxe]

I idly touch my hair way too much than is healthy. Some of the strands have become really rough from being rubbed all the time.

And sometimes I just get the urge to rip a brush all the way from my roots to my ends. I know it's damaging, but it feels soooo gooood.

[PraiseCheeses]

Right now, I'm trying to figure out exactly what routine is least damaging for my hair. I'm a 2c/3a naturally, but I've straightened my hair for the last decade (mostly heat-free and entirely heat-free for the last 2 years, so it's in great shape) and have no patience to figure out my natural hair, which I hate. It's fine, so the weight easily pulls it straight to my shoulders, then it's wavy to BSL, and then it's tangly-curly down to my waist.

If I leave my hair alone, it tangles something awful while washing and looks flat and ratty by day 2, so I either have to detangle mats or detangle in the shower every day. Way too much manipulation, and my baby-fine hair does not take well to shower detangling. Fingers or wide-tooth comb, I wind up with gobs and gobs of hair.

If I straighten it, I only have to wash it every 4 or 5 days and daily manipulation is easy. Detanging, easy. Putting it up, easy. But, I have to brush it straight when it's damp and put it up so it dries straight. That can't be good either. Lately I've been finding a lot of broken-off ends in my comb when I comb it straight. I know I have to find a way to prevent that, because I'd like to keep what thickness I have in my hemline.

If I detangle it coming out of the shower and let it dry naturally, it's rubbing on my clothes and getting caught on things. I'm trying to find a way to put up my gently-detangled wet hair so it dries in less than 12 hours (3 max would be nice...) and I'd like it to dry in a way so I can keep it detangled when dry. It's up all the time, so it really doesn't matter whether it's straight or wavy or curly - but how can I get it dried and up in a way that doesn't torture it???

[Bagginslover]

Night braiding-I don't always want braid waves, and loose hair at night is the only way to ensure I don't have them, but the tangles!! Not good!
Playing with my ends-I do it constantly! Even if my hair is up, if a layer pokes out, I fiddle with it! Naughty!
Treating it gently-I always brush too quickly, and its not til something tugs or snaps that I remember!! Maybe I need a message on my brush to remind me!

[CSallaround]

Fragile ends. Split ends, hair breaking off, dryness etc. It's like trimming doesn't help for more than a week so I would need a bigger cut to get rid of it (which I'm not really ready for - maybe in the summer when it might get even more damaged from sun etc anyways?)
I think these are the reasons for my bad ends:

1) I don't wear my hair up (at least not very often). I know it prevents damage but I just like it better down and usually my scalp gets sore from updos. And now that it's winter I don't go out without a hat and am therefor forced to wear ponytails or braids as a bun simply is not possible for me when I have to wear a hat. (I know there are those ear/headbandthingies but they don't cover the top of the head so it doesn't work for me as I need TOTAL coverage xD)

2) Being gentle. I try but I simply forget sometimes. I am gentle most of the time though and work my way up from ends to roots in sections. I cringe every time I'm too hard and can hear/feel the hair breaking.

Edit:
Maybe I should also mention that I used to chemically dye my hair (darker) so that's probably also a valid explanation to my ends being so fragile.

Boom...

[CurlyCurves]

Frizz. Frizz. Bloody frizz!

[jlb]

I can never seem to remember to comb the bottom of my hair first to detangle before I do the top half. No idea why this is a difficult concept for me.

[lunalocks]

Patience. Mostly because I am in my 50's, and I am not a fast grower. Have to keep reminding myself to enjoy the process, and that this is longer than ever before.

[veyron]

Frizz and very (I don't know how to put this but) scattered hair. It's like each individual strand is repelling one another so I look like a ******n lion especially when my hair is freshly washed & dried! I've been told the only way to tame my hair is to chemically straighten (rebond) it but the one thing I loathe more than crazy hair is dead straight lifeless hair. I'm trying my best to come to terms with my hair but I abuse it waaay too much with hot tools.

[Vanilla]

I struggle with stretching washes. My length likes when I do, but my scalp isn't as happy. I wash now twice a week. I wish I could get down to once a week.

[rtree721]

Good to know that I am not the only one who struggles with these things. I struggle with a lot of things. I would say trimming would be my main problem. I do have damage but I hate trims. I have to force myself to get a trim once a year. Another thing I struggle with is protective updos, since I prefer my hair down.

[UpNorth]

Split ends. I have some really damaged sections I can't cut off, And If I would try to cut everything off, my hair would be around APL.. I try to S&D but it seems to make it worse. It is not THAT bad though, I can live with it for a while.

[Zabethbartsch]

I struggle with resisting the urge to chop off the last of my dye damage and the ghost of layers past. Only the very top layer (canopy) has any chemical dye left, as far as I know, and that hair has 70-90% of all the splits I find. Everything underneath is fine. I'd have to cut about 2" off in order to get rid of most of it, but then I'd be cutting off 2" of healthy virgin hair from what used to be longer layers, and that seems like such a waste.

All in all, my dye-damage ends aren't THAT bad, considering the dye and the fact that they haven't been trimmed probably in 2-3 years while I was trimming longer layers. I would consider getting layers again (with the shortest layer being only 2" or so shorter than the length), but I a) don't have the money to be going to a salon right now, and b) don't really trust any hairdressers to leave the length and do exactly what I want.

In the mean time, I guess it's dedicated S&Ds and constant vigilance when it comes to keeping those ends moisturized!

[Zabethbartsch]

Sorry to go off topic, but UpNorth according to your signature picture, it looks like we have a VERY similar texture. I'm 1b, with only the tiniest hint of a wave at my nape and super straight ends.

[RileyJane]

i still struggle with handling my hair nicely, and even when i seem to master that... my friends havent. last time i wore my hair down, all my guy friends kept playing with it and swishing it all over my head, lets just say i had some splits after that, and have learned to wear my hair UP around my lovely friends! LOL

[Taenarian]

My great struggle is combating the urge for a professional trim to solidify my hemline. Only now at BSL (plus or minus, depending on the tenacity of my braid waves when dry) is my hair feeling long to me. Too many times I read the "walk-ins welcome" and fight down the urge for an unplanned trim. I'd love to be solidly waist length before I consider a hemline trim again. I reckon over the past two years or so I've lost maybe close to a year's growth to hemline trims. Yet I still feel an urge to trim when I can plainly see my hemline is fine :confused:

[bobaerose]

Since i am going back to my virgin color... it would be avoiding the temptation to touch up my roots. I have not had my natural color since pre-teens! Its a struggle on the horizon for sure!

[tigereye]

I struggle with convincing myself not to wear my hair down or in half-ups for all the fancy dinners/do's at this time of year. And if I do, that I should at very least put it up after the dinner, before the real partying starts.
The trouble is that with all the uni balls, work nights out, Burns night, Christmas dinners etc. of the last few months, my hair doesn't like being down so much. Especially not with the after-parties, where there is a tendency towards people drunkenly pouring a variety of sticky beverages everywhere, including over my dress and the ends of my hair. I wear machine- or hand-washable dresses for this reason at most of these parties, but imagine trying to detangle after getting vodka and coke dried in. Its happened more times than you would think this last couple of months, even when I haven't actually been drinking myself. Yet, I still go out with my hair down. I have plenty of lovely updo's I can wear instead, I just tend to forget about them as soon as the dress comes out.

[melusine963]

Even though I've been washing my once a week for over a year now, I still struggle with managing the greasies by day 6. I wish my scalp would just settle down already. :(

[ludwig20]

My scalp! A few sections have stubbornly flat strands that never seem completely clean. They're not oily or waxy, but they seem coated. :(
Flat roots are such a pain.

[kidari]

I trim way too much and wash too often. The only thing I have overcome is staying on top of moisturizing- I have successfully updated my washing routine to CWC and I religiously do weekly treatments for months now. Oh wait! I also don't have any more urges to dye it a different color or cut shorter to APL so I can tease and heat-style without abandon! It's also been 6 months or so since I teased or used a flat iron on my bangs... so I just need to work on keeping my hands off the scissors and daily washings ack!

[TheLuckyLurker]

Wow, great responses.

Something else I've found I have a problem with is laziness. It can be good when I'm thinking about trying something my hair doesn't really need but sounds neat (I'm sure my habit of dithering and off-putting has saved me from a few disasters, lol), but it also means I don't do things I should as often as I should.

[~BoHemiAngel~]

I still struggle with accepting my fairytale ends. I used to have very thick hair with a blunt hemline, but have experienced significant shedding the past few years. I have spent the past 4 years or so trying to trim back to achieve a blunt hemline, only for it to appear stringy again after a few months. Now I have finally reached waist (AGAIN), and I am leaving it there, fairytales or no :) On to hip!!!

[CurlyCurves]

Wow, great responses.

Something else I've found I have a problem with is laziness. It can be good when I'm thinking about trying something my hair doesn't really need but sounds neat (I'm sure my habit of dithering and off-putting has saved me from a few disasters, lol), but it also means I don't do things I should as often as I should.

This is me lately LOL

[CarpeDM]

Tangles, bent ends and splits, oh my!

[starlamelissa]

I do not deep treat, hardly ever. Like twice a year. I feel like I should, cuz that's something longhairs do, right? And then I just don't.

[Fairlight63]

Thin - fine hair - that is very tangle prone! I put oil on it and detangle it & braid it bun it & the oil evaporates from my hair in no time.

[Chromis]

I do not deep treat, hardly ever. Like twice a year. I feel like I should, cuz that's something longhairs do, right? And then I just don't.

Lots of us don't actually!

[petitepraline]

To put my hair in a braid before going to sleep at night. I just get so lazy before bed....

[Mandie]

Patience and frustration are my biggest issues. I have a tendency to get irritated at my ends and instead of gently babying them I flip my hair over at 4am and lop off 16". I sure showed my hair that night. -sigh- I'm also terrified I won't be able to get to my goal so I suspect my constant cutting is my way of proving I'm in control not my cycle of genetics. I haven't cut in about three years so here's hoping I can hold off the impulse.

Along with that, forgetfulness/laziness. I forget to oil, I forget to take my vitamins, I almost never braid because sometimes the braid waves are more frizzy and annoying than the couple of tangles I wake up with (my hair is suuuuper slippery so it doesn't tangle a whole lot).

[Luminaria]

FRIZZ, detangling, single strand knots, and impatience/frustration (grow already!!! Or should I cut it short and start over?). Oh! I forgot split ends, though it's a recent development....

[beryl]

Split ends (I think more than 50% of my hair must be split at the end) and wearing my hair up. I need to learn some more pretty updos, I think. Wish I could French braid!

[Siiri]

Wearing it naturally. It just takes too much time to dry it without toughing it. I always towel dry it and use a comb, so it's straighter than my natural texture. It would be nice to have it more wavy sometimes when I wear it down.

[Aveyronnaise]

I having a really hard time with my mixed hair texture. Some of my hair is 2B/C and Some of it barely 2A there is a thin canopy of straight that I just can't get wavy like the rest. Also the bottom 5 inches has been chemically dyed and is really straight, you can seriously see the LHC demarcation line. it's bonkers.

[monika]

Figuring out washing method.

[Vintagecoilylocks]

I really need to slow down when taking my braids out. Sometimes I create the SSK right before my own eyes because I am trying to hurry and unloosse a braid. I don't always be focused on what i am doing is my problem. thinking of the dinner menu or something and next thing i know a knot:slap::headache::hatchet:

[lydiajo]

I struggle with remembering to do a S&D. Also with putting my hair up other then for work. I work in the operating room so my hair is always up and in a cap.