How do you not pull your hair out?

[CousinItt]

This is the longest my hair has ever been, and I'm constantly ripping out hairs when I braid, or twist it, or when I'm preening. Even my loose sleep braid snaps hair. I swear, between my pulling it out, and my comb, i'll be bald before the year is out *sigh*

Am I just bull-in-a-china-shop hard on my hair, or is that pretty normal?

[jacqueline101]

Have you thought about seeing if the issue isn't hair related? Another words not style related.

[spidermom]

I don't pull out too many hairs, but a few. It happens.

[torrilin]

Are we talking pulling hair out in the "ow ow ow that hurts" way, or pain free? Coz the pain free kind is normal. We shed hairs every day that are done growing, same as we shed dead skin cells. Since my hair is long and I don't wear it down much, the hairballs I shed each day look enormous.

The ow ow that hurts kind I do occasionally, but once or twice a month is not going to be a big deal when there's around 100,000 hairs on my head.

[Vanille_]

I don't know if this is true, but I have a feeling that hair gets weaker over time and so when you have longer hair it might be more prone to breakage? Also depends on your hair's health and genetics I am guessing. I really try to be gentle with my hair, but I do shed and see breakage. I try to go with it. Before showers or brushing, I actually try to get the shed hairs out but running my hands down the length of my hair and gently pulling on the bottom for the shed hairs. The hair is broken anyway, I'm just getting it out sooner than later.

[CousinItt]

I'm talking pulling out in the ow!ow!ow! way. Yeah, I just yanked a whole hunk from my nape just because I twisted up into a bun and the hairs were placed in the wrong spot of the twist.

[ravenreed]

Try twisting with less torque. I have a very, very tender scalp and I very rarely rip hairs out from the scalp. The longer my hair gets, the slower I have learned to go. Think of it as a happy little hair meditation maybe.

[CousinItt]

Try twisting with less torque. I have a very, very tender scalp and I very rarely rip hairs out from the scalp. The longer my hair gets, the slower I have learned to go. Think of it as a happy little hair meditation maybe.
Hair meditation... I like that!

[dollyfish]

I like the advice I've seen around here to treat one's hair like "antique lace." Though I assume you're already being very careful! There's only so much you can baby your hair while still taking care of it, combing it, etc. Personally, I think this might be related to either your diet or hair care routine, or even both. I used to shed ALL the time, plus I ripped hair out like crazy, like you're describing. It was like my hair was way too brittle. I rarely got split ends because my hair seems pretty resistant, but ripping was happening every time I did anything (especially combing, or taking out a ponytail). What helped *my* hair the most was lots of moisture (my hair is brittle when it's dry, and it's prone to dryness) and less shampoo.

Try stretching an individual shed strand. Does it stretch and stretch without holding shape well? Does it stretch normally and feel strong? Or does it snap apart with little tension without stretching much? If it's the latter, you might be lacking moisture!

[trolleypup]

If an updo starts pulling, down it comes, redo redo redo give up...redo later.

Snags and tangles, I typically clip my hair at nape and finger detangle so that I can let go of the tension before it actually pulls the hair out.

And...my kneeling posture has changed so that I am less likely to step on my hair when I stand up.

[Madora]

Patience is key when handling long hair. How you use your comb to detangle makes a major difference. Hold it gently..like it was alive and you're afraid to use too much pressure in fear of harming your comb. A delicate, gentle touch always works. Sure, it is slower..but your hair benefits. Always make sure to detangle your hair gently before trying any updos. Detangle in small, thin sections, a little at a time, working from the tips to the scalp.

[torrilin]

I'm talking pulling out in the ow!ow!ow! way. Yeah, I just yanked a whole hunk from my nape just because I twisted up into a bun and the hairs were placed in the wrong spot of the twist.

Twisting big locks of hair shouldn't cause small groups of hairs to move. So something weird is going on with how you're twisting your hair up into a bun. Not sure what could be going wrong. It might be good to try out some wrapped or knotted bun styles to see if other techniques are more comfortable for you. Since you have curly hair, you might try an Aphrodite knot to start. IIRC that's a pretty short hair friendly knot. BSL is about 27" on me and I can do a regular knot bun at that length. The Celtic knot bun takes a good bit more length, at least 2-3".

Hopefully someone who gets on better with wrapped buns can make suggestions to try there... I tend to prefer knots.

I had to learn to relax about buns as my hair got longer. It sounds weird, but most buns hold better if they're done fairly loosely. Trying to use the tightest possible twist isn't good for your hair or your scalp.

[WaitingSoLong]

I have this trouble quite a bit, especially with braids or intricate updo's. Mostly with braids. I just avoid them usually. Kind of sucks.

[Vintagecoilylocks]

If you have ever watched in movies how they show ladies maids handling their emplyoee's hair? Downton Abby for example. Or Bramwell ? They are so gental. I realized when I paid attention that I was too harsh on my hair. So just pretend you are doing a Lady's hair or a royals hair. Allow yourself more time, slow down and carefully detangle.

[RileyJane]

id say if you were having problems braiding, maybe your hair is extremely tangle prone, try detangling GENTLY with your fingers, then a wide comb, until ur hair seems alright. mine is like that sometimes, but i never pull out my hair. same goes for sleeping... maybe a braid just isnt working for you, try to do a bun, and wear a silk sleep cap (with a silk pillowcase) and see if that helps. it could also mean that you just need a good trim. if your seems to be pulled out a lot, deff go see a doctor and make sure everythings okay and that it isnt a sign of something else going on