No-tangle solutions for long-haired boy...Help us avoid a haircut!

[happyvegan]

My 9yo son has had his hair to waist-length before and ended up cutting it off very short (standard boy haircut length) because of tangles. It's now back to waist-length, with the same issue once again. He REALLY doesn't want to cut it again. His hair is very thick, about 1.5 inches through his ponytail, and somewhat coarse. And oh, does it tangle. We don't shampoo or condition it very often and it never looks dirty, but the tangles make me think that he needs more conditioning (we only use natural/vegan kinds) and maybe some kind of protective styling. We also don't brush it regularly because it hurts his tender head and I hate to force the issue. I'd be fine with him just dreadlocking up but he doesn't really want to (I've had to start and brush out two sets of dreads in his hair already due to mind-changing).

Are there any detangling solutions that are generally recommended for this type of hair? More washing? Conditioning more often? Some type of hair oil? ANY ideas, I'm game. I just hate to see him cut his hair again when desperately wants to keep it long. I'm lost on this issue because even when my hair was waist-length I could go YEARS without brushing it and I never got tangles...but I have my own troubles. I'm growing out a particularly short (almost buzz cut) pixie...

Obligatory pic:

About 18 months ago when his hair was "BSL":
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v233/happyvegan/gabeyseat.jpg

[battles]

Oiling may help, and I know a lot of people have good luck with coconut oil. This may be a long shot, but braiding could help prevent tangles also.

[Mesmerise]

My daughter's hair is also particularly prone to tangles, it's thick and very fine! I haven't yet found a great way to deal with it, as, like you, my hair really doesn't tangle much at all. This whole "detangling" idea is sort of foreign to me as I can wash my hair, get out of the shower, and run a comb through it with maybe hitting one or two really easy to remove knots!

I think the best thing to do is give it a really good condition after washing one day, and then take the time to get all the tangles out (when my daughter's hair was waist length when she was younger this would take me a good 45 minutes EACH TIME), and then braid it! It's not so bad to leave it loose during the day, I find, but it HAS to be braided at night or it will be a bird's nest in the morning (her hair is only about APL now... we cut it back to chin length with an undercut in an attempt to control the tangles and make it easier for her to brush, but she got teased for the undercut and decided to grow it out, so now we're back to quite bad tangles even though it's not that long yet).

[DinaAG]

coconut oil and evoo mixed with a little tea tree oil so that he wont catch anything at school may be try adding some aloe vera gel too? weekly deep conditioning with oils?

[picklepie]

Vinegar rinses helped LOT with tangling for me, but for dd's long hair (curly and waist length) I would apply a quarter-sized amount of conditioner as a leave-in after co washing,which made a big difference. The only way to totally prevent tangles, on both of us, is braiding. Would he go for that?

[JCM]

I could not help but notice the great white shark t shirt he is wearing.

[Mountaingrrl]

The long hair looks really nice on him. As someone with similarly thick, coarse hair, I find that detangling works best in the shower with lots of conditioner. Smooth pillowcases help prevent nighttime tangles. I agree about the braids and coconut oil. A nape knot / bun could also work as a protective style.

[DancingQueen]

Coconut oil should help a lot, I know my hair tangles a lot less on that. Just soak his hair in it two hours before showering. You can also use a bit as a leave-in.

You say you use natural shampoos. I know it is better for some people, but others simply need cones. I know when I use cone-free or sulfate free shampoo, my hair is almost impossible to detangle. Maybe let him try some coney shampoo? I know ganier fructis have some amazing products.

Good luck with it - I really hope he doesn't cut it!

[melusine963]

I would recommend coconut oil as a leave-in conditioner, and regular detangling (at least finger-combing once a day). Since his scalp is very sensitive, could you try detangling in small sections while holding his hair above where you're brushing/combing so that there's no direct pulling on the scalp?

[Natalia]

My 2 cents would be to try out different oils monoi (a coconut oil) has a sandalwood scent a boy might not mint id he thinks coconut is too "girly" ;), finger comb, and try avc or citric acid rinses the latter is less stinky. My brother kept mostly long hair for over half his life though he wasnt as prone to tangles and i never recall him owning or using a comb. He kept it long due to several severe looking cowlicks but they didnt seem to increase tangles. He is naturally a tad oily which may have helped.

[Quixii]

I would say to really try to detangle at least once or twice a day. If you really take it slow, maybe try out the tangle teaser everyone raves about, hopefully it would hurt his head. But letting the tangles accumulate over multiple days are only going to make the tangles worse and more painful to take out.

Also, protective styles like a braid or even just a ponytail can really cut down on tangles.

[ladyfey]

Tangle Teezer and Earthly Delight conditioner. My hair is like your son's, only longer. I tangle teeze before shower and then gently comb the conditioner thru in the shower. I also use a satin pillowcase for sleeping. Both iherb and vitacost have Earthly Delight.

[afu]

Personally I don't find that coconut oil does much for me in terms of detangling, but sweet almond gives amazing slip - might be worth playing around with a few different options. Containing the hair at night is a must, braids or bundled into a sleepcap if he doesnt want to braid waves

[SleepyTangles]

I'm not expert children-wise, but instinctively i think a braid will help during day/playtime: asking a child to not mess with his hair is nearly impossible! Well, if he likes braids.

By the way, long hair suits his face very much!

[jojo]

I have fine but thick hair and mine too gets a whole lot tangly once it makes waist, i use some coney conditioner mixed in a spray bottle with water and spray the very ends, wait a few minutes and comb through. I also use a tangle teaser which i cannt reccomend enough for those with tangly hair, its works a treat!

[Sillage]

Oh wow, he's got amazing hair! Agree that it would be a shame to cut it. I would suggest a coney leave in, maybe an oil like Garnier Moroccan Sleek Oil Treatment (it has great reviews at MUA) or Organix Awapuhi or Macadamia Dry Styling oils.

[Naiadryade]

He's got beautiful hair, I'm glad you're both looking for solutions other than cutting it! Everyone else has had great suggestions (detangling regularly before it gets really bad, keeping it braided during tangle-prone activities such as sports and sleeping, oils), so I'll just add this:

Try a variety of oils until you find what works for his hair. Everyone is suggesting coconut oil, but for me coconut oil actually made my hair HARDER to detangle, like it was sticky, whereas olive oil gives me wonderful tangle-deterring slip!

Also, if he doesn't like the style of a braid (if it's too girly or whatever)... samurai bun?

[Iolanthe13]

I agree with the suggestions about cones, but you say you want to use all-natural products. If he's willing to have his hair soak for a little while, catnip rinses might help. The tangles have probably created a lot of split ends, which will make the problem worse, and catnip rinses keep split ends at a minimum. This is also a cheap option, and there's nothing girly-smelling to worry about. It has worked well for me in combination with Avalon Organics shampoo (the lavender one). If he's really patient, you could try to S&D, but it's hard to imagine a child sitting still for that long! Also, mineral oil can work well as a leave-in to prevent tangles.

[happyvegan]

Wow oh wow! So many replies so quickly! I will have to go through and write everything down, but my impressions are SOME kind of oil is a good place to start. We have some lovely olive and coconut oil so I will try those. The braiding would be fine (we homeschool and he really doesn't have any preconceived notions of what is girly or boyish), except that it's so cold right now and he swears that his neck gets cold if his hair is braided. He is really just cold-natured anyways so I think I will get a couple of turtleneck shirts for him to wear to bed so I can at least braid it at night.

To Sillage: I wondered about adding something with 'cones to the mix. I've never really used a conditioner on my hair so I don't know much about the different types. I keep hearing mixed opinions on 'cones but I really am most concerned with the tangle issue at this point, so if the oil doesn't work I may have to break out the big guns. Right now all I have is some Giovanni leave-in and BWC leave in. Probably too natural to have a lot of slip. I will look into a 'cone conditioner for sure, even if just for the hot spots.

To ladyfey: Satin pillowcase! Great idea! I've heard of silk ones before which I prefer to avoid. Satin, perfect!

I looked at the Tangle Teezer but the problem even with regular brushes is that it fails to get through to his "understory" (that's what he calls it, his understory). His hair will look really nice and neat on the surface but underneath is a hot mess. Would I just brush it in layers?

Thanks for all the compliments, I will pass them along to him. He's very proud of his hair; since the picture 18 months ago, it's been cut off to all one length and is now to his waist. The last time it was to his waist like this he was 3-4yo. That's how long he's preferred to wear his hair long! He was heartbroken when he got it cut off 4 years ago and would let it grow forever if not for the darn tangles and his tender head. I'm really trying to find a hair-saving regime for him. I appreciate every suggestion and will try anything and everything! :)

[jacqueline101]

I'd say coconut oil and braid it to keep it from getting knots.

[Kiwiwi]

I really suggest a tangle teezer, it's really really great!

Also detangling in the shower while his hair is covered in conditioner. And then before sleep too.
Hopefully it will get better with the tangle teezer and it might hurt him less.

Also, how do you brush? Do you go from the ends slowly to the roots? Because if you start at the roots the tangles build up downwards and it gets really hard (and painful).

[Sillage]

To Sillage: I wondered about adding something with 'cones to the mix. I've never really used a conditioner on my hair so I don't know much about the different types. I keep hearing mixed opinions on 'cones but I really am most concerned with the tangle issue at this point, so if the oil doesn't work I may have to break out the big guns. Right now all I have is some Giovanni leave-in and BWC leave in. Probably too natural to have a lot of slip. I will look into a 'cone conditioner for sure, even if just for the hot spots.

Coney conditioners are great, but for maximum detangling power I recommend an coney oil or serum. I love cones and they make a huge difference in my hair-- conditioners, no matter how coney, don't even come close. As you said there are a lot of opinions on cones but at least they can be shampooed out if you don't like them :)

The Tangle Teezer for me gets all the way to my understory (I call it that too, LOL). If it doesn't, brushing it in layers is a creative solution. Maybe having an octopus clip (they remind me of the face huggers from the Alien movie series) would help. You can get them at the drugstore and they look like this:

http://i.imgur.com/4arZD.jpg

[lacefrost]

It seems your tangle issue is coming from lack of detangling. Even if he had a different hairtype, he's still a 9 year old boy and kids that age tend to be very active. There is a way to detangle hair without it hurting his head though. What you do is this:

Take a section of hair -and when I say "a section" I don't mean half of his hair or a third. It has to be smaller than that, maybe a fourth or a fifth- and firmly grip it with your left hand about 3 inches above where his hair ends. Detangle those three inches. Once they're tangle free, move your hand up higher (maybe another 3 inches) and detangle more. Continue the process til you get to his scalp. If you're gripping your hand firmly enough, he won't feel any pain. Your hand effectively stops his hair from getting pulled at the scalp. This is a method that I and other curly people use. If you watch this video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lZLSb6hnkfo you can see how she grips her hair. You don't have to smooth his hair or hold it taut as she does. That's just to smooth out her curls.

I would detangle his hair every night and braid it before bed.

Hope this helps!

[Amygirl8]

I know this is an odd suggestion but perhaps have him try to detangle his hair himself?
Back when I was younger and my mum detangled, it always hurt my head (my hair was still around hip length at the time) and ever since I started doing it it's become easier and less painful.
9's pretty young but it's good to learn and it may be simpler. Just show him how you brush yours and let him try for himself.

Besides that, I second the coney conditioners and the mineral oil. Mineral oil makes detangling so much simpler, it's not even funny.

[happyvegan]

I know this is an odd suggestion but perhaps have him try to detangle his hair himself?
Back when I was younger and my mum detangled, it always hurt my head (my hair was still around hip length at the time) and ever since I started doing it it's become easier and less painful.
9's pretty young but it's good to learn and it may be simpler. Just show him how you brush yours and let him try for himself.



I wish, I wish he would! Poor little thing, he tries but somehow it ends up a bigger mess than when he started. It seems like the tines of the comb/brush get caught and he doesn't free them completely before he goes in for another stroke. Maybe the Tangle Teezer would be a self-detangling solution, and maybe he would feel more inclined to learn to self-detangle if he had a special gadget. :D

[happyvegan]

It seems your tangle issue is coming from lack of detangling. Even if he had a different hairtype, he's still a 9 year old boy and kids that age tend to be very active. There is a way to detangle hair without it hurting his head though. What you do is this:

Take a section of hair -and when I say "a section" I don't mean half of his hair or a third. It has to be smaller than that, maybe a fourth or a fifth- and firmly grip it with your left hand about 3 inches above where his hair ends. Detangle those three inches. Once they're tangle free, move your hand up higher (maybe another 3 inches) and detangle more. Continue the process til you get to his scalp. If you're gripping your hand firmly enough, he won't feel any pain. Your hand effectively stops his hair from getting pulled at the scalp. This is a method that I and other curly people use. If you watch this video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lZLSb6hnkfo you can see how she grips her hair. You don't have to smooth his hair or hold it taut as she does. That's just to smooth out her curls.

I would detangle his hair every night and braid it before bed.

Hope this helps!

Yes, he is VERY active. Being homeschooled means he is outside climbing trees and running around in the woods for several hours every day. We often battle with twigs and leaves that don't want to come out of his hair!

I have tried the method described above and it works GREAT for general detangling, although the problems really come when I get to the root, because MOST of the dreadlocking happens in the top half of his hair. I end up trying to grip the root with just my forefinger and thumb but it's hard to grip hard enough that he doesn't feel the pull.

I think you are right in that I don't detangle often enough. On one hand, I don't like doing it as often as I should because it makes him hate his hair. But when I finally do go in to detangle, he STILL hates his hair, just less often. I think I just have to stay on top of it and maybe with the right products it will get less painful.

[happyvegan]

Coney conditioners are great, but for maximum detangling power I recommend an coney oil or serum. I love cones and they make a huge difference in my hair-- conditioners, no matter how coney, don't even come close. As you said there are a lot of opinions on cones but at least they can be shampooed out if you don't like them :)

The Tangle Teezer for me gets all the way to my understory (I call it that too, LOL). If it doesn't, brushing it in layers is a creative solution. Maybe having an octopus clip (they remind me of the face huggers from the Alien movie series) would help. You can get them at the drugstore and they look like this:

http://i.imgur.com/4arZD.jpg

Would I find 'cone oils and serums at the drugstore? Beauty supply stores? And are there any ingredients or brands I should look for? He's up for ANYTHING, and at this point so am I. We're SO getting a Tangle Teezer, though. I showed him a vid of it and he's pretty excited. :)

[RavenBaby]

Using shampoos with sulphates gave me so many tangles but now I mostly co wash and when I do shampoo I make sure to cover all my hair with a deep conditioner and leave it on for a short time, even when that fails I use a leave in conditioner as well. try aussie hair insurance

[AnqeIicDemise]

The TT can get to his understory. You may have to section the hair into four then detangle the tops and bottoms of the hair -- like, the upper cannopy, then push the TT into the hair from the bottom, tines to the sky. I have to do that on some particular moist days and my hair thin compared to most. (It doesn't look particularly thick until I braid it, I'm a solid iii).

I hear what he means about the cold nape. It gets some getting use to and after a few months, maybe weeks, it won't be as noticeable. I was the same way. Now I can't have my hair loose as I get overheated. Turtle necks and scarves are a great way to keep him warm right now while he gets accustomed to braiding.

ps: you've got a very handsome boy with an amazing head of hair. Once he gets older he'll have the larp and LOtR community gals crazy. Get prepared mama! :D

[AnqeIicDemise]

Friz Ease is super cony and it has a serum and I believe now a leave in conditioner in the line. There's also Silk Drops. I believe Torrinpaige gets the 'no name' brand of silk drops in a huge container at Sallys. I personally would go to Sally's myself but then again, that's like.. going into the den of temptation if you're in for a single thing and on a budget.

Pantene's pretty cony, Finesse is too. Fekkar a 'higher end' product is super cony. It flattened my hair in one wash but I think it also has olive oil in it. Great for dry hair. I was more partial to Infusium 23 myself when I had my problem hair. I think the formula changed and it no longer smells like green apple but I still hear its pretty good for those who need it. I used their live in conditioner and shampoo. At the time my hair looked like a cleaopatra wig that'd been stuffed in the dryer it was so damaged and in need of moisture.

[sisi33]

First thing I thought when I saw your son- little Viking lord. :p

I would start out with oiling (try a DT with the oil before the next wash) and the Tangle Teezer, and if that's still not enough move onto 'cones, or if you can, get him to try CO'ing? It's a lot of work, but where he doesn't already wash his hair much, I think it might be worth it to just try it out. Satin pillow cases are fantastic, and give more slip (at least to me) that silk ones, so I would make one of those. When getting fabric, watch out for anything that might get static-y, or might catch the hair some how. Certain satins do that.
As far as braiding in the Winter- which I hate with a passion most of the time- whenever I'm going to do it, instead of regular English braiding, where you're taking the strands and bringing the inwards, I take them and go outwards, like you've been Dutch braiding. This keeps my ears nicely covered by hair!

And if you do end up going to a Sally's to get a TT, I would suggest getting one of their wooden combs as well, for use while in the shower with conditioner.

Good luck!

[Sillage]

Would I find 'cone oils and serums at the drugstore? Beauty supply stores? And are there any ingredients or brands I should look for? He's up for ANYTHING, and at this point so am I. We're SO getting a Tangle Teezer, though. I showed him a vid of it and he's pretty excited. :)

There are a million cone serums/oils out there so it can be difficult to figure out which one to use. However, the good news is that there are plenty of great drugstore options. Garnier Sleek and Shine Moroccan Sleek Oil Treatment is highly rated at MUA, inexpensive and you can get it at any drugstore. It's basically a simple blend of cyclopentasiloxane and dimethiconol with a little argan and apricot oil thrown in for appearances. The cyclopentasiloxane is a cone that evaporates-- it's there to let you spread around the heavier dimethiconol. I really like blends with cyclopentasiloxane because they make application so much easier. Also if you think you've put too much in it's a nice surprise when some of it evaporates off!

Applying coney oils and serums does take some getting used to. The biggest thing to remember is to start with a little bit. I guess everyone has their own technique but what I like to do is to spread a drop or so in my hand, rub my palms together and then very lightly pat my hair. Since I wear my hair up (and want the nape to look nice) I also do this on the underside of my hair with my head upside down (this might be good for your son since he gets tangles on the underside). Then I use a brush or TT to distribute it. It's quick and easy and not too much of an imposition-- even for a kid!


BTW, I agree with AnqeIicDemise. He's going to be quite the heart breaker!

[melusine963]

Take a section of hair -and when I say "a section" I don't mean half of his hair or a third. It has to be smaller than that, maybe a fourth or a fifth- and firmly grip it with your left hand about 3 inches above where his hair ends. Detangle those three inches. Once they're tangle free, move your hand up higher (maybe another 3 inches) and detangle more. Continue the process til you get to his scalp. If you're gripping your hand firmly enough, he won't feel any pain. Your hand effectively stops his hair from getting pulled at the scalp. This is a method that I and other curly people use. If you watch this video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lZLSb6hnkfo you can see how she grips her hair. You don't have to smooth his hair or hold it taut as she does. That's just to smooth out her curls.

This is exactly the detangling method I was trying to describe in my earlier comment. Thank you for explaining it so clearly!

[happyvegan]

So much info and so many choices! Sounds like a trip to Sally Beauty Supply is in order. We'll be next door watching the Hobbit tomorrow anyways, so it's perfect timing.:D

I do have a plan coming together, though. I have an old satin robe I never wear and the fabric is pretty nice so I'm going to repurpose that for him. Tangle Teezer, oil and perhaps coney serum, wooden comb, braiding, turtlenecks, maybe look into the CO thing for him. We don't use anything with sulfates so no worries there (I've been a freak about that for at least a decade) but I want to try everything.

And since my hair is super short right now, it'll be fun playing around with long hair stuff again. ;)

[WaitingSoLong]

Ok I am going to suggest....dreadlocks. :couch: Maybe that is not for him or his peers would not accept that, I don't know, but once it is done (I suggest having it done, not "letting it get done" naturally) there is no detangling required. He would have to learn how to wash his dreads properly, though.

Apart from that, there is another thread on here about someone's sister (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=109530) with a similar problem. I haven't read through the whole thread but perhaps there may be some useful info in it?

I will also be a boob and disagree with ANY kind of oil. Oils attract dirt and for a young boy, that is probably not a good idea. His hair may be much worse after a few hours with any kind of oil in it. I think heavy cones would do the same.

My hair gets tangles really bad, too. I have to wear shirts that are slick or at least as little friction as possible (I can't wear silk ALL the time) and jackets are slick on the outside as well. Nape knotting is horrid and even of my hair is in a braid or ponytail, I still get it. However, I would still suggest a braid. I pretty much wear mine up except on special occasions and then I have to detangle every hour or so. However, BRAID WAVES do not tangle near as much as the waves stay sectioned and don't float as individual strands like when it is straight. Braid his hair at night, spritz some conditioner on as you do, walla...braid waves next morn, hopefully less tangly. If this works, detangling would NOT be desired because then the waves will just POOF.

I agree with many of the other suggestions...that he detangles his own hair: find him some manly smelling conditioner and dilute it with water in a spray bottle and let him have at. Having long hair requires knowing how to care for it and he is definitely old enough to do that on his own. Maybe he already is, I read this thread super speedy because I really need to be in bed right now!

I also suggest the Tangle Teazer.

And not sure if it was mentioned but my hair tangles much worse when it needs to be clarified or chelated.

[OrganicJewel]

how about braiding it at night and not wearing it down all the time? Would he wear a braid or a bun or something?
My advice would be to comb it when he gets his hair washed and it has conditioner in it, preferably if he has a bath before bed, then loosely braid it. In the morning spray it with leave in to dampen it, and comb it to get rid of the braid waves, then give it a light oiling. I think not detangling it would be worse in the long run, because it would start to matt.

[happyvegan]

Ok I am going to suggest....dreadlocks. :couch: Maybe that is not for him or his peers would not accept that, I don't know, but once it is done (I suggest having it done, not "letting it get done" naturally) there is no detangling required. He would have to learn how to wash his dreads properly, though.



I would LOVE for him to have dreadlocks. I had them for a couple of years and so did my brother. And, in fact, so did my son, but only for about 2 months, when he was 4ish.

Here's when we first started them:
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v233/happyvegan/IMG_18961.jpg
So cute in his dread tam:
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v233/happyvegan/IMG_19091.jpg

But alas, he's very tactile, and found the prickly and unpleasant. I loved them, though, and once they developed they would have been awesome. :D

[happyvegan]

So, on the night of the 30th, in preparation for our trip to the movies (and Sally!) we did a thorough detangling. I found a coney conditioner under my bathroom sink from back when I spent almost a week combing out my brother's 2 year old dreadlocks. It was a few years old, but seemed to do the trick. It was easier to detangle than before, especially given the state his hair was in. Afterwards I let it dry and then lightly oiled it with coconut oil.

I did get the Tangle Teezer and a wooden comb on the 31st, and we've been using the TT every day, twice a day, to keep his hair neat and tangle-free. Also, I've been braiding it every night. The hair tie comes out while he's sleeping every night (his hair is very sleek now) but it's still fine in the morning. He hasn't washed or conditioned it since then, just keeping it brushed. I know it's only been 4 days but I'm very optimistic!

I will probably try a no-'cone conditioner next time to see if I can get by without the 'cones. I only like to use natural products, but I would make an exception for this, if only those products weren't so strongly scented.

So much great advice. Thanks to you all!

[Sillage]

YAY! I'm glad things are working out and your kid gets to keep his magnificent hair!

[spidermom]

The advice of coconut or any oil to fight tangles is strange to me. Oil attracts more lint and dust to my hair, which makes tangling even worse. Braiding doesn't help much, either. All the hairs that stick out of my braids knot up with each other as my braid swings around. Braiding then bunning or just plain bunning is the only thing that prevents tangles, and not many boys are agreeable to bunning.

A coney serum does make detangling less of a chore. I'd definitely keep a spray-on detangler on hand; there are probably some natural/vegan product choices out there.

[happyvegan]

I wanted to post the pic I took of his hair after we conditioned and detangled 5 days ago, although indoor with a flash so the color is off. He was very proud of how nice it looked! Even after several days, it looks almost as nice, except a little fluffier with braid waves. So happy with all of my newfound wisdom! And now I can't wait to grow my own hair out again...I need to find a pixie-to-shoulder thread. :D

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v233/happyvegan/gabeyhair_zps5f36c3c0.jpg

[spidermom]

He does have great hair. And I don't mean to discourage against a braid. It helps, definitely.

[Sillage]

Wow his hair looks like satin, so slick and smooth. Wish mine was like that!

[dollyfish]

I agree the the posters who've recommended you teach him to detangle his own hair. Buy a tangle teezer and a wide-toothed wood comb and show him what to do. I don't think 9 is too young to understand such things, and if he's the one doing the work he can control the various (potentially) painful sensations involved. Plus, if he enjoys it more this way perhaps he'll detangle his own hair often enough that you won't have to :)

Also, though I think my hair is coarser than your sons, the tangle problems you describe sound really similar to my own. Have you tried detangling his hair with a wide-toothed comb while it's soaking wet? Still in the bath or shower is best, but even pre-towel soaked is easier than dry detangling for me.


ETA: Your son has BEAUTIFUL hair, by the way. I'm glad he thinks so too and enjoys it so much :D

[AnqeIicDemise]

It looks so soft and glossy I want to pet it. e.e

I know he's usually used in a derrogatory term but Cousin It had a rockin' head of hair. ITS GORGEOUS... and your son's hair reminds me of Cousin It. Hehe.. now I want to put dark glasses on the back of his head for amusement purposes.

I'm glad you found something that works.

[WaitingSoLong]

The advice of coconut or any oil to fight tangles is strange to me. Oil attracts more lint and dust to my hair, which makes tangling even worse. Braiding doesn't help much, either. All the hairs that stick out of my braids knot up with each other as my braid swings around. Braiding then bunning or just plain bunning is the only thing that prevents tangles, and not many boys are agreeable to bunning.

I am glad there is someone else out there who agrees with me on this! The only exception is a paranda braid...it takes MUCH longer to fuzz out and therefor can go a lot longer before I get braid tangles.

[akilina]

Gah he is seriously just gorgeous!!!!! :o :] Aww ^_^
^_^

What I really love is using aloe vera! None of the dyed green or blue ones..just 100% aloe like fruit of the earth. I got the brand "Real Aloe" from the Co-Op that is just 100% aloe. That stuff makes my hair silky smooth.

Or coconut oil???Just a little finger nail scrape rubbed in between your hands and then ran down the length. I don't like it that much..I only like it for the added moisture and thats all. I have to sort of agree with spidermom and WSL.

Also, Maybe getting a Tangle Teezer hair brush would be a good idea! Start from ends to root and it seriously takes out any tangle for me. It feels good too. is A braid an option for him? Just one at the nape? Or maybe a banded pony tail at the nape with several hair ties down the length (not sure what its called)? You could even get hair ties that are similar to his hair color so its not so obvious.

[Kosmos]

Both my sister and I tangle like crazy. I use a lot of conditioner and oil my hair with coconut oil, I also use a leave in conditioner from Alba Organics which is amazing. My sister uses a 'kid-safe' detangling spray after the shower. You might want to invest in a tangle teaser as well as both my sister and I have had great success with that.

[Neoma]

What a beautiful child! His hair is gorgeous. :flower:

I really recommend http://www.amazon.com/Kinky-Curly-Knot-Today-Conditioner/dp/B00128WK4I. I read that it is "vegan friendly." I use it as a rinse-out product -- a little goes a long way. It has fabulous slip.