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View Full Version : Date. What do I do with my HAIR and WEAR?



heyshortyhey
September 9th, 2012, 10:54 AM
There's a good chance I'll be going out on a date soon, and I need some major help. Right now I just keep my hair up because I'm trying to not go crazy as it's growing out. It's about BSL, maybe a tiny bit under. I used to have layers but everything has grown out now; even my bangs. I've been trying to grow them out just to see if I'd like them. But I'm afraid my hair might not be public-appropriate. If I end up going on this date, I'm definitely going to recolor my hair, but I have no idea what to do with it! My hair is thick and coarse and it goes into that boxxy-pyramid look because it's straight across at the hemline. I want to go get layers...but I'm so afraid of having them messed up. I also don't really want to wear it up because my face is kind of fat, and I don't want that to be the first thing he sees.

Secondly, clothes! I'm 23, but being 4'9'' my clothing range is limited--at least until I lose more weight. My clothes are either sweats and logo teeshirts, or jeans and slightly-fancier-than-normal tops (some that show a lot of cleavage)...then what kind of shoes?! Are ballet flats too little-girl? What about a pair of nice boots with a low heel? Tennis shoes?? I'm just not sure how to dress like a 23 year old because I've never had the chance! Let's face it, something that looks great on a normal-height girl might not look as good on someone who is as tall as a 9 year old:(

lydiajo
September 9th, 2012, 10:58 AM
I'm no help on the clothing issue but....are you really considering layers and color for a first date with this person. Are you going to keep up the layers? You need to be true to who you are.

Kelikea
September 9th, 2012, 11:01 AM
I think that, being 23, you are still young and can wear nice jeans and a nice top on a date. Maybe pair a nice boot cut jean with heels and a cute top? If it is really low cut, wear a cami. Showing too much cleavage on a first date is probably not a good idea:) Maybe you could have a friend over and try some things on for a second opinion? Same options with the hair. Or look for pictures of styles you like on lengths close to yours. Take a picture with you if you decide to cut. You could even go the same day as your date and have them fix your hair for you. This is what I did for a holiday party 2 years ago. I needed a trim and then just let them style it. Killed two birds with one stone and I was all set for my party!

HylianGirl
September 9th, 2012, 11:14 AM
Hey! I know how you feel about your height, I am 21 years old and 5 feet tall myself ^-^ Try wearing some pants a longer blouse/shirt that goes a little over the pants, that alongates the body, v-neck colars are also good for that. Even though I am short myself I don't like wearing heels (they hurt my feet) so I don't mind wearing flats, unless you are going to a very fancy place. But if you are going for a dinner or movies, high heels won't be that much of a pain since you'll be seated most of the time. If you want to wear a skirt, don't wear a long one, it'll probably make you look shorter, and if you are not confortable showing your legs, use stockings ^-^ they are very feminine. I also would say to not show too much cleavege on the first date, it may give the wrong message. Dark clothes tend to make you look more serious and grown up.


About the hair, have you thought about a half up? It could soften the hemline, and not give too much enfasis on your face.

Kinda like this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YLDhoOJ1-T0

What is your hair type? maybe some curls could also soften the hemline. Or maybe something like this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pKeMXvjESI8&feature=plcp

Good luck, I hope your date goes well ^-^


ETA: I remembered something ^-^ If you want to wear boots, try a pair of dark boots over dark pants (like black boots over dark blue jeans), that will make your legs look longer, if the color between the pants and the boots contrasts too much, it sections the body, which is something to avoid when you want to drive the attention away for short height.

heyshortyhey
September 9th, 2012, 11:40 AM
I'm no help on the clothing issue but....are you really considering layers and color for a first date with this person. Are you going to keep up the layers? You need to be true to who you are.

Yeah I'm really considering it. I don't want to look like a homeless person (and I'm not saying those of us who are growing out look like homeless people--I'm just saying *I* do). I'd be getting layers and a cut anyway, but I wanted to wait until around December. Growing my hair out isn't who I am, it's just what I want to do. Layers wouldn't take much from my actual length, but my hair tends to grow in crooked so one side is longer, and it's just so dull and boxy it's driving me nuts. If a guy is showing an interest in me (especially me being overweight) the least I can do is put some effort into my appearence, you know?


Hey! I know how you feel about your height, I am 21 years old and 5 feet tall myself ^-^ Try wearing some pants a longer blouse/shirt that goes a little over the pants, that alongates the body, v-neck colars are also good for that. Even though I am short myself I don't like wearing heels (they hurt my feet) so I don't mind wearing flats, unless you are going to a very fancy place. But if you are going for a dinner or movies, high heels won't be that much of a pain since you'll be seated most of the time. If you want to wear a skirt, don't wear a long one, it'll probably make you look shorter, and if you are not confortable showing your legs, use stockings ^-^ they are very feminine. I also would say to not show too much cleavege on the first date, it may give the wrong message. Dark clothes tend to make you look more serious and grown up.


About the hair, have you thought about a half up? It could soften the hemline, and not give too much enfasis on your face.

Kinda like this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YLDhoOJ1-T0

What is your hair type? maybe some curls could also soften the hemline. Or maybe something like this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pKeMXvjESI8&feature=plcp

Good luck, I hope your date goes well ^-^


ETA: I remembered something ^-^ If you want to wear boots, try a pair of dark boots over dark pants (like black boots over dark blue jeans), that will make your legs look longer, if the color between the pants and the boots contrasts too much, it sections the body, which is something to avoid when you want to drive the attention away for short height.

Those are great tips, I'll see what I have. Pants tucked into the boots or rolled up above the boots, or boots under the pant leg? Always a problem for me. Like I said, short legs, and most boots come up to my knees...I think I only have one pair that don't lol. I don't really know what my hair type is. I thought I knew a long time ago, but I gave up trying to type it >< there's a picture on my profile after a set of rag curls... I might do it like that, or half up half down like you suggested!


I think that, being 23, you are still young and can wear nice jeans and a nice top on a date. Maybe pair a nice boot cut jean with heels and a cute top? If it is really low cut, wear a cami. Showing too much cleavage on a first date is probably not a good idea Maybe you could have a friend over and try some things on for a second opinion? Same options with the hair. Or look for pictures of styles you like on lengths close to yours. Take a picture with you if you decide to cut. You could even go the same day as your date and have them fix your hair for you. This is what I did for a holiday party 2 years ago. I needed a trim and then just let them style it. Killed two birds with one stone and I was all set for my party!

Yeah, probably not a good idea at all! I don't want him to get the wrong impression. I was thinking of having my friend come over and help me color my hair, since I need to do it anyway, so I did ask her if she would help.

millyaulait
September 9th, 2012, 11:40 AM
I wear simple black ballet flats with everything, they always work!

I vote for dark jeans & a nice top. That way you feel comfortable but still not slobby or anything.

Artisticat
September 9th, 2012, 11:57 AM
For wardrobe - I vote black or dark denim skinny jeans paired with a nice silky tunic and some heels of some kind - boots are great this time of year!

As far as your hair goes...my advice - don't do anything to your hair that you weren't going to do anyway.

My story - I had a meeting with the "big boss" and wanted to look more "professional". I went to a hairdresser who took my BSL hair to SL and put stripey highlights and razored it to death. My meeting ended up being canceled and I have to live with that decision to this day (9 months later...uneven layers, etc). On the plus side - I discovered LHC!

spidermom
September 9th, 2012, 12:09 PM
For the hair, pull the sides up and back, similar to what HylianGirl is suggesting. You can make it simple or put some time into it; up to you. You don't need a haircut for a date.

As for clothing, it really depends on what you're going to do. I'd suggest different things for dinner at a nice restaurant vs a movie and fast food vs a hike, etc.

elbow chic
September 9th, 2012, 12:24 PM
when I was at that length, with lots of triangly "poof," I liked to part to the side, section off the canopy (which is now all off to one side) and braid it. Secure with a tie that matches your hair. Leave the underlayer down.

Gave the impression of it being "down" and looked lush and a little romantic, not just "poofy and huge." You can adjust the amount of braided section to leave more or less hair left down. It's less severe and dated than a half-up pulled straight back. (to me that look can be really '90s "Christian mom")

I got lots of guys telling me they really liked my hair "with that braidy thing on the side." lolz men.

As to the clothes, wear something with a low heel, the boots sound ideal. It's September, after all. Not so much that you're tottering around like you're going to the junior prom, but enough to give you a bit of boost. I think ballet flats are too casual and FLAT for a short chick who sometimes needs all the help she can get in the "looking grownup" department, right?

And... I think cleavage is a bit much for a first date-- assuming you are interesting in possibly having a "relationship" based on shared interests/solid mutual attraction and not just a speedy roll in the hay (not that there is wrong with that, either, lol)

So... maybe a cute top with a camisole underneath. Pants you like, and the boots.

Good luck!

spirals
September 9th, 2012, 12:40 PM
I agree with all the outfit advice. I'd probably do boots with jeans, too. If you want to get layers, do it. Have just the bottom inch and a half layered to take some of the bluntness out, which is what contributes to the pyramid effect. Once it gets longer, it won't be too much layering to trim off. Or you can be like us ladies who like long, layered hair.

HylianGirl
September 9th, 2012, 01:09 PM
Those are great tips, I'll see what I have. Pants tucked into the boots or rolled up above the boots, or boots under the pant leg? Always a problem for me. Like I said, short legs, and most boots come up to my knees...I think I only have one pair that don't lol. I don't really know what my hair type is. I thought I knew a long time ago, but I gave up trying to type it >< there's a picture on my profile after a set of rag curls... I might do it like that, or half up half down like you suggested!


Yeah, probably not a good idea at all! I don't want him to get the wrong impression. I was thinking of having my friend come over and help me color my hair, since I need to do it anyway, so I did ask her if she would help.

Glad I could help ^-^ I guess boots under the pants would alongate the body more, since they "section" the body less, if that makes sense xD Those rag curls look really cute =) they would look romantic for a date. try searching half up tutorials on youtube so you can get more ideas, I do that when I don't know how to put my hair hehe. Also glad to know you intended to get your hair cut and colored before and not just doing that for the date, I know this is told all the time, but, try to be yourself, instead of doing things to please others, if a guy is gonna like you for someone you are pretending to be, than he's no good for you, he has to like you for who you are ^-^

jacqueline101
September 9th, 2012, 02:06 PM
I'm 30 so I'm older then you my advice is boot cut jeans and I'd keep the hair you have unless you're willing to have layers for a long time.

Ashlbee
September 9th, 2012, 03:55 PM
If your planning on getting the layers anyway and think they will make you feel better and prettier, by all means go for it! I personally love layers and have them myself.

Maybe after getting it layered you could do some soft, romantic curls? They tend to be very sexy and pretty. For no neat you could try the sock bun, headband curls, etc. or, if you are ok with using heat in your hair, a large barrel curling rod (about 1'5" - 2" ). If not into the curled look, a ponytail or bun can be a great date look, especially if it is a little messy. For 20-somethings, that tends to be the current style (at least here in Southern California).

As for the clothing, dark wash jeans are ALWAYS a great option. Whether to get boot cut or skinny jeans is up to you. If you are wider, I think skinny jeans emphasize that and give you a more pear shape and straight cut jeans are actually more slimming. Depending on the weather, a heeled boot, flat boots, or regular heals are a good option. Men love heels on women.

For the shirt, get something that emphasizes your figure in a good way! Something moderately low cut, but still classy, that has a waist band around the smallest part of your torso, usually right below the breasts for most women, is a great option.

Also, relax and have fun! When he asks you out, it means he's already attracted to you just the way you are! Feel good knowing he already likes you and have a great time! :D

KwaveT
September 9th, 2012, 06:57 PM
Ladies have already given you fashion advice. I will emphasize to being yourself. None of this doing hair this way or that way or dressing this way or that way to impress a man. Even worse people going on dates trying to mask their real personalities since they are afraid of turning the date off. Then you are going to have to keep the act up the rest of your life and end up disappointing them when you don't. Men don't like the bait and switch tactics anymore than you ladies do. If he is not interested in you for who you are then he is not worth the trouble.

heyshortyhey
September 10th, 2012, 02:26 PM
Ladies have already given you fashion advice. I will emphasize to being yourself. None of this doing hair this way or that way or dressing this way or that way to impress a man. Even worse people going on dates trying to mask their real personalities since they are afraid of turning the date off. Then you are going to have to keep the act up the rest of your life and end up disappointing them when you don't. Men don't like the bait and switch tactics anymore than you ladies do. If he is not interested in you for who you are then he is not worth the trouble.

lol wat? I'm not trying to impress him. If I had any other reason to go out I'd want my hair done and my make up done too. I don't have a job right now and have been hibernating in my room since probably April. My hair spends all its time in a clip and badly needs a trim and color. If I'm going to be going out and seeing a guy, or getting a job, or seeing family or friends, why wouldn't I at least put some effort into the way I look? There's faking "who you are" (I'm not a slob, I just didn't have any reason to do any of these things the last couple months), and then there's just giving a crap.

Might not be important to some people, but it is to me.

I just really, really like to hibernate when I'm unemployed/depressed lol.

...probably a bad idea because the hair at the nape of my neck is really tangly blah.

heyshortyhey
September 10th, 2012, 02:29 PM
Well you guys have helped a lot. I decided just to color my hair like I was going to anyway, and do the ragcurls. That way I can just get my hair trimmed around December, like I planned. I really like how the ragcurls they turned out, and my hair is a bit longer now, so they should look a little better.

I've also already tried the boots and jeans on together. I like the combo, and it does make me look more grown up which is FANTASTIC. I just hate everyone looking at and treating me like a kid, yanno?

So thanks a lot everyone!

akilina
September 10th, 2012, 02:36 PM
Well you guys have helped a lot. I decided just to color my hair like I was going to anyway, and do the ragcurls. That way I can just get my hair trimmed around December, like I planned. I really like how the ragcurls they turned out, and my hair is a bit longer now, so they should look a little better.

I've also already tried the boots and jeans on together. I like the combo, and it does make me look more grown up which is FANTASTIC. I just hate everyone looking at and treating me like a kid, yanno?

So thanks a lot everyone!
Wow I am glad you figured it all out! :D
So this is totally none of my business really and its okay if you don't want to answer...but is this your bf that you have talked about in other threads? Or is this a date with a new guy?
If its a new guy- how exciting! I hope things work out as well as they can :)
Maybe this is the first step in getting yourself out there, and not hibernating in your room anymore.

heyshortyhey
September 10th, 2012, 04:39 PM
Wow I am glad you figured it all out! :D
So this is totally none of my business really and its okay if you don't want to answer...but is this your bf that you have talked about in other threads? Or is this a date with a new guy?
If its a new guy- how exciting! I hope things work out as well as they can :)
Maybe this is the first step in getting yourself out there, and not hibernating in your room anymore.

:confused:Wha? Someone...remembered something about me? :eek:That's...so weird! No, things with that guy unfortunately didn't work out. This is a new guy. He lives much closer, and we met on a dating site.

And possibly! I hope so, at least.

Unicorn
September 10th, 2012, 05:30 PM
I'm a tad late... I'd glad you got your date night sorted out. For your December trim, I wondered if you'd considered a U trying a shaped hem rather than layers, if you're worried about layers. It would calm down the pyramid shape and you could always go for layers the next trim if the U shape doesn't have as much impact as you wish. Just a thought.

Enjoy your date :)

Unicorn

HylianGirl
September 10th, 2012, 05:42 PM
I am glad I could help, and I hope things turn out great with this guy, hope you have lots of fun together ^-^

akilina
September 10th, 2012, 10:58 PM
:confused:Wha? Someone...remembered something about me? :eek:That's...so weird! No, things with that guy unfortunately didn't work out. This is a new guy. He lives much closer, and we met on a dating site.

And possibly! I hope so, at least.
:) Its not that weird. Look at yourself with more self worth.
That is great that this one lives so much closer!
Have you exchanged photos and stuff at all? Or have you met in person yet?
Dates are scary to me -_- I am sort of happy that I dont have to worry about anything anymore now that I have been with my bf for almost 2 years.

heyshortyhey
September 17th, 2012, 10:17 AM
Yeah we exchanged photos. We met first on Sunday, then spent the whole day together Saturday. We really clicked. I wasn't expecting that.