Hair Venting

[blaketob]

I can't stand the way my hair looks. It is always frizzy and poofy no matter what! It's so frustrating and it's been this way for the last 3 months. And yes I've tried oils and leave-ins. All seem to work but only for about an hour. I'm hoping when fall comes the poofyness will stop. I realized that the majority of my frizz is short baby hairs which I can't really complain about but having a bad hair day everyday is really putting a toll on my self esteem and confidence. I just feel like I don't look pretty :/ also I just moved into my apartment at school and I have no AC which is affecting my washing routine. I can barely stretch washes more than 2 days because of sweating throughout the day and night. Also my hair has been shedding more often because the heat makes my hair knot like crazy. Sorry about all of these negative feelings I'm just super frustrated and want cold weather to come and help :)

[akilina]

:grouphug:
Its okay to vent :]
I feel the same way every day. I hate my hair.
I am not willing to chop it all off again though. I should take off about 2 or 3 inches but I really don't want to take that big of a step backwards.

About the washing: do what works best for you. I wanted to stretch my washes and do CO like everyone else because it sounds good, but the simple fact, is that I can't. No matter what, I have to S+C every day.

One thing that may help you stretch is rooibos tea??
I just started using it 3 days ago and if anything, it helps get rid of the greasies. I put it in a spray bottle. I would normally was today but I do not think that I need to because of the tea :]

[jojo89]

Feelings are temporary and so is the bad hair. You will find something that works for you. Research and experiment; trial and error. I don't like the length of my hair but it doesn't bother me cuz I know it is temporary and in a couple months it'll be even more tolerable. I have bad hair, but I make the best of it.

[spidermom]

When I really want or need a smooth, polished look, I turn to styling wax, pomade, or putty. Natures Gate styling putty was my favorite, but they discontinued it. A tiny bit goes a long way, and it's impossible for hairs to stand on end when you stroke enough of these products over it. I will bun my hair, then spread the product over 1 or 2 fingers, and stroke down all the sticky-ups.

[EndlessSunshine]

I know the feeling, humidity is crazy for hair!

[blaketob]

akilina: I'll have to try that tea to help! Usually I am able to stretch to four days but this heat is making my hair gross

jojo89: I know these feelings should be temporary, I'm just feeling really discouraged. I trial and error a lot but I havent in awhile because I hate to put something in my hair and then not like it. I have done it a couple of times over the summer, I tried coconut oil which completely made my hair feel gross, and I've tried honey and at first I loved it and then after two other times it just didn't work well in my hair. I'll just have to keep trying :)

spidermom: That sounds exactly like something I need. Does it last long, meaning the way your hair looks. Does the sleek look last more than a couple of hours? Also where would I be able to find some of this wax products?

[spookyghost]

When I really want or need a smooth, polished look, I turn to styling wax, pomade, or putty. Natures Gate styling putty was my favorite, but they discontinued it. A tiny bit goes a long way, and it's impossible for hairs to stand on end when you stroke enough of these products over it. I will bun my hair, then spread the product over 1 or 2 fingers, and stroke down all the sticky-ups.

I think pomade/putty is about the only thing I havent tried to anchor those dang flyaways/frizzies! Thanks spidemom!

Op-I know where you are coming from-unfortunately. I have felt this way since at least March. No joke. I feel that my hair is the ugliest it has ever been right now because of all the damage. Everytime I look in the mirror, which is everytime I go to the bathroom, I want to just cry. Im doing everthing I can to get it healthy again but lets face it-the damage has to grow out. I have tried disguising the damage because I can not, will not, get my hair cut. But nothing hides it not even a little. Thats why I liked spidermoms suggestion. I never tried the pomade before. If that helped even a little, Id be happy!:)

I truly hope you feel better about your hair because hair means so much to most people. Its a part of who we are and our identity. My hair means so much to me that I really dont know how Im going to last probably the next five years while my damage grows out. Im going to do it but its going to be ruff!:p On a more positive note-I will never bleach, curl, or straighten my hair ever again. I have absolutely no desire for anything but healthy hair:D

[spidermom]

You should be able to find these products at any hair salon, department store, even some grocery stores. Just remember, a tiny bit goes a long way. It lasts until you comb through your hair or possibly walk into a strong wind (I've never had that happen).

[ravenreed]

As I have posted elsewhere, I am not convinced that stretching washes is all that necessary. My hair does much better, as does my scalp, when I was every other day. My hair grows just fine.

[blaketob]

I like stretching washes because I feel like my hair likes benign neglect.

[tiny squirrel]

@ blaketob- I notice we have a somewhat similar hair type. I'm a 1c/2a M ii/iii. I HATED my hair in high school and cut it short in college to "manage" it (with a flat iron). I always felt like it was just poofy and frizzy but not curly. I was always envious of both beautiful spiral curls and sleek straight locks. A very curly headed friend recommended this book to me. http://www.amazon.com/Curly-Girl-Handbook-Lorraine-Massey/dp/076115678X I thought she was crazy at first since I think of myself as barely wavy, but I read it and gave the tips a try. I kid you not, the book changed my life (my hair life anyway :)). I will say, it took about 3 weeks for me to really see results, and I have made alterations as I have begun to understand my hair. If Curly Girl doesn't work for you, keep trying things! I hope you can find a way to love your hair's natural wave and texture. Keep us posted.

[BlazingHeart]

I agree with Spidermom about the waxy type pomades. I don't like the putties and hairwaxes, as they tend to be much stiffer, stickier, and less pleasant to the touch. My old favorite was KMX brand, but I haven't bought any in a while, and I can't remember what my current jar of pomade is, because I use it so often.

For me, they last until I brush, wash, or sleep on it (hey, I was 16 or so when I started using this stuff, gimme a break!)

~Blaze

[blaketob]

@ blaketob- I notice we have a somewhat similar hair type. I'm a 1c/2a M ii/iii. I HATED my hair in high school and cut it short in college to "manage" it (with a flat iron). I always felt like it was just poofy and frizzy but not curly. I was always envious of both beautiful spiral curls and sleek straight locks. A very curly headed friend recommended this book to me. http://www.amazon.com/Curly-Girl-Handbook-Lorraine-Massey/dp/076115678X I thought she was crazy at first since I think of myself as barely wavy, but I read it and gave the tips a try. I kid you not, the book changed my life (my hair life anyway :)). I will say, it took about 3 weeks for me to really see results, and I have made alterations as I have begun to understand my hair. If Curly Girl doesn't work for you, keep trying things! I hope you can find a way to love your hair's natural wave and texture. Keep us posted.


Is that similar to the curly girl method on this website? I apologize for the lateness my internet was down all weekend. Amazon said I wouldn't get the book for two months! So i was curious if it was a similar method.

[tiny squirrel]

I searched the forums and skimmed a few threads. Yes, it seems to be the same method. I found that with the curly girl method I can either comb in the shower, spray with gel, plop a bit with an old t-shirt and have "curly" hair. OR, I can comb in the shower, squeeze out water, comb out straight and have mostly striaght with body waves hair. I LOVE being able to dabble in both worlds! On humid days, or when I think I will be sweating a bit, I ALWAYS curl or put it up.

I don't know where you live, but I just checked and my local library has the book. That might be an option for you.

To battle the frizz the first thing I would recommend (if you haven't tried it already) is Co washing. Let us know if you try it and how it goes.

[RileyJane]

I sometimes feel like if i cut my hair all the same length it would be a lot thicker looking! I dont bc its very pointless to cut soo much length off just bc i think it might look better. Im just going to let it be bc ik in a few more months itll be exactly where i want it :)

[jacqueline101]

My hair likes humidity now but when it was curly permed it was fuzzy.

[Islandgrrl]

This thread is over a year old......