I'm not sure if you're talking about frizzy, shorter head hairs growing at your sideburns, or actual facial hair...?
My nape hairs act the way you describe. Almost every updo just looks STUPID on me - it's not soft and feminine, it's messy and unkempt. These hairs are finally growing long enough that they fan out along the back of my neck, looking a lot like a lobster tail, and since they are coarser and curlier than the rest of my hair they give the overall look an extra 'oh, she's unkempt' look.
My solution? Either TONS of bobby pins to hold the worst of it in place, twisting before I pin for extra hold, or - I just wear my hair down. I'm not willing to slick my hair down with gel and oil to the point that it stays smooth, just to wear an updo that I'm not really crazy about anyway.
The only thing I can hope is that this 'different' kind of hair eventually grows strong and long enough to contain it in an updo...