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Thread: Does anyone ever try to discourage you?

  1. #161
    Member Kittykins's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does anyone ever try to discourage you?

    My mum is very supportive because she can see I take good care of it. She also helps me henna it and style it sometimes. My boyfriend is also very supportive. He has APL length hair and I S&D his hair for him. My friends haven't noticed that I'm growing it yet.

  2. #162
    Member Tabihito's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does anyone ever try to discourage you?

    I had someone tell me I should cut my hair because it 'doesn't look like I take care of it' today. In his defense, I didn't have a hairbrush this morning and he saw me take it down to redo my bun. And my haircut is wonky because I'm still growing out bangs (they're getting close to shoulder now).

    But still, it was sort of discouraging.

    Lady Fáreryniel of the Depthless Forest in the Order of the Long Haired Knights!
    Somewhere in the region of very near waist...

  3. #163
    Member ApatheticFairy's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does anyone ever try to discourage you?

    A few coworkers commented on my hair because I wore it down the other day (I didn't have time to put it up) that it was shorter than they thought it was since I wear it bunned all the time, then went on to say they know a "great stylist" that could "thin out the bulk" of my wavy hair.

    I was a little sad at their comments, and they when they asked why, I said I was trying to grow it out to tailbone length and they were pretty horrible about it, saying that it would look "ratty and moldy" because I wear it up so often. I just shrugged and said that I heard that wearing it up protected it, that I was doing an experiment. For Science. Then boldly strode off.

    My boyfriend, however, is very supportive of my length dream, but very quietly laments the fact that I'm blonde instead of dying it red. (and gives the sad puppy dog look at the last box of red dye in the closet every so often) He's never berating, but I think he just has a thing for redheads. I just don't think it works for me, since I'm so pink (I think my rosacea plus red dye is too overwhelming on my face) and refuse to wear foundation to fix it. But he makes me feel a bit guilty that I feel more confident as a blonde.

  4. #164
    Member sparrowswing's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does anyone ever try to discourage you?

    My mom absolutely hates long hair. Apparently she felt socially obligated to keep her hair long as a teenager in the hippie generation, and as soon as shorter hair became the "in" style, she went with it and never looked back. And she has encouraged me to do the same most of my life. I remember when I was young - 4-7 years old, mostly - all the pictures I drew of girls had hair at least to their knees, and it drove her nuts. She swore if I ever tried growing it that long, she'd sneak into my room at night and cut it. It never came to that, but I think my dad's love of long hair played a big role in that.

    Now I'm living several hours away from my parents, so every trip home is full of my dad mooning over my locks and my mom frowning and dropping the occasional scathing remark but accepting that there's not really anything she can do to convince me. My boyfriend loves my hair, though, and while he's happy with any decision I make, he wants me to grow my hair out super-long.

    I'm pretty sure I get more positive reactions than negative.

  5. #165
    Member SilverDoe's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does anyone ever try to discourage you?

    No one knows I'm growing it out, and at nearly BSL it's nothing out of the ordinary. But my mother is extremely discouraging about ANY change I want to make hair wise.
    If it's a new routine, CO washing, stepping away from chemical dyes to henna, colour B4, honey lightening, home made treatments - she freaks out & tells me I'm going to permanently mess up my hair.

    Almost all changes & experimentation has been positive & for the better, she seems to think it was just luck.
    She's had a mullet for 25 years, and does not use anything moisturizing at all. Really mom, I can handle it.

  6. #166
    grumpy moon princess millyaulait's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does anyone ever try to discourage you?

    Not yet - I keep my hair up so much that nobody really knows it's past SL.

    My SO doesn't like that I don't look 'perfect' all the time anymore because I stretch my washes.

    But then again he doesn't like anything I do these days....

    I'm just trying to love myself but he is unsupportive of hair/skin care & weightloss eventhough he makes digs at me for not being thin/long haired/clear skinned.

    {
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    & wishing for waves }


  7. #167
    Reached terminal length bte's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does anyone ever try to discourage you?

    Quote Originally Posted by EdG View Post
    Translation: we're bad for business.
    Ed
    Exactly - come the revolution, when the longhairs take over, we'll have to lock the stylists up!
    It's one of my prod boasts that I have never paid a stylist. The last time I had a haircut which anyone (my parents, otherwise it wouldn't have happened!) paid for was in 1969 when I was 14.

  8. #168
    Member Falcore's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does anyone ever try to discourage you?

    Quote Originally Posted by millyaulait View Post
    Not yet - I keep my hair up so much that nobody really knows it's past SL.

    My SO doesn't like that I don't look 'perfect' all the time anymore because I stretch my washes.

    But then again he doesn't like anything I do these days....

    I'm just trying to love myself but he is unsupportive of hair/skin care & weightloss eventhough he makes digs at me for not being thin/long haired/clear skinned.
    Oh, that's sh**ty he should be the one person you'd expect to be supportive and be bringing you up. Not down!

    You have lots of support from us all hugs to you

  9. #169
    Queen of Purls Carolyn's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does anyone ever try to discourage you?

    My parents didn't like long hair. My mom was pretty vocal about it until I was in my 20s. I had started growing it out in the 9th grade when I was finally allowed to style and care for it myself. She continued with the anti long hair comments until several years after I was out of college. Other than that no one has been interested enough in my hair to comment on it. If they thought it looked awful they kept their comments to themselves. My internet friends have been very supportive but no one other than one friend really is. No one is being discouraging now but it would be nice to have some real life encouragement and support.


    I am not here to decorate your world

  10. #170
    I'd rather be outside browneyedsusan's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does anyone ever try to discourage you?

    Quote Originally Posted by ApatheticFairy View Post
    A few coworkers commented on my hair because I wore it down the other day (I didn't have time to put it up) that it was shorter than they thought it was since I wear it bunned all the time, then went on to say they know a "great stylist" that could "thin out the bulk" of my wavy hair.

    I was a little sad at their comments, and they when they asked why, I said I was trying to grow it out to tailbone length and they were pretty horrible about it, saying that it would look "ratty and moldy" because I wear it up so often. I just shrugged and said that I heard that wearing it up protected it, that I was doing an experiment. For Science. Then boldly strode off.

    My boyfriend, however, is very supportive of my length dream, but very quietly laments the fact that I'm blonde instead of dying it red. (and gives the sad puppy dog look at the last box of red dye in the closet every so often) He's never berating, but I think he just has a thing for redheads. I just don't think it works for me, since I'm so pink (I think my rosacea plus red dye is too overwhelming on my face) and refuse to wear foundation to fix it. But he makes me feel a bit guilty that I feel more confident as a blonde.
    You are a beautiful girl, ApatheticFairy! Hair goes through awkward stages, and some of them last a while. You do what's best for you and makes you happy! Your co-workers probably have no idea how they come across--unsupportive, and almost hurtful. Rock your bun! Rock your blonde! --and make sure your Sweetheart gets some extra cuddling from his blonde bombshell. --nothing like a good distraction to make a man love the hair you have!

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