Growing long hair, but not just to cut it off!

[kschr2004]

Rant -

I just spent 2 hours on Facebook with an acquaintance (who used to own a styling salon) explaining to him that I would not look good with short hair and that I wouldn't like the maintenance of it either. He wants me to grow my hair really long so that he can then cut it really short, like pixie short.

Why is it that some stylists are so adamant about cutting your hair short, even when you tell them all the reasons why it wouldn't work for you? (Caveat: I did have really short hair at one time in my life. Loved it at the time, hated the maintenance and the growing out process.)

He seemed to think that me letting him cut my hair really short would free me, and be some sort of transformative process for me. I couldn't convince him that it would just not be 'me', and that I am perfectly happy now with my hair long. I already like myself, just the way that I am.

- End Rant.

Kimberly

[Honestwitness]

When I tell people the reason I'm growing my hair long is for spiritual reasons, they never argue with me and try to get me to cut it. If I think they can be trusted with more detail, I will say that I have something specific that I have been praying about for a long time and growing my hair long is a kind of demonstration that I don't intend to give up on this particular prayer request until I get an answer. So far, that has worked really well to get people to keep their ideas about my hair to themselves.

[desertgirl]

I like your reason for growing your hair out Honestwitness. I hope your prayers are answered! (though, I don't know if I want to see you cut your hair, it's beautiful!)

I think reasons that people can't argue with are helpful in dealing with the 'why don't you cut it' question.

[Carolyn]

I would have ended that conversation in 2 minutes, not 2 hours. Tell him no means no and you like it long and that's the end of it. He can't be much of a friend if he harassed you for 2 hours. Tell him to find someone else. He sounds like one of those haircutting freaks.

[kschr2004]

I would have ended that conversation in 2 minutes, not 2 hours. Tell him no means no and you like it long and that's the end of it. He can't be much of a friend if he harassed you for 2 hours. Tell him to find someone else. He sounds like one of those haircutting freaks.

Yep, I will say I was beginning to think that after a lot of what he said tonight.

Since he was someone who I initially met via work (he came in via a consulting gig previously to give us some training), and I was trying to get some work advice from him, I was trying not to burn bridges. But by the end of the conversation tonight, I was about ready to end even the work relationship with him!

[pennylane]

I would have ended that conversation in 2 minutes, not 2 hours. Tell him no means no and you like it long and that's the end of it. He can't be much of a friend if he harassed you for 2 hours. Tell him to find someone else....

What she said.

[Venefica]

In my favorite hairdresser shop I think only one of those working there have long hair, the rest have really short and spiky and all of them want to cut my hair. I tell them no way, then I tell them the reason why I am growing my hair out is that I want to look like the ghosts in Japanese horror movies as well as to practice various form of Spiritual hair magic and they look at me funny for some reason.

I think that many still have the idea that a free woman have short hair, while the more traditional women who is bound to a man's approval have long hair. Look at movies, if you have a female rebel, or a woman that stand up to men you can bet she have short hair. For me yes, long hair but me into contact with the traditionally feminine, but it is also for me a symbol of accomplishment, having grown my hair back from having had a mental breakdown and hacking it off while rocking back and forth and crying is a testament to me getting better, it is also the result of many hours of loving care and great patience where cutting it short would give me a prettier hair style right there and then instead of having to wait for it to grow long. Long hair is a symbol of freedom for me. And what else, I think it is pretty, and that I think is something some hairdressers need to learn, what the customer his or herself think looks good of them. I am proud of my hair, I would not be so proud of short hair. The Gods have given me this very thick and strong hair as a gift, I might as well show it off as well as I can.

When I tell people the reason I'm growing my hair long is for spiritual reasons, they never argue with me and try to get me to cut it. If I think they can be trusted with more detail, I will say that I have something specific that I have been praying about for a long time and growing my hair long is a kind of demonstration that I don't intend to give up on this particular prayer request until I get an answer. So far, that has worked really well to get people to keep their ideas about my hair to themselves.

Honest Witness, can I ask what Spiritual reasons you have for growing out your hair. I hope my question is not to intrusive and please forgive me if it is. I am just so fascinated by everything Spiritual and would love to hear more about how other pepole view the Spiritual.

[Bonkers57]

Wow, your hair is gorgeous! It's grown a lot since I first started coming to this board Keep up the good work.

Spiritual reasons is good enough for me since it stops the questions.

When I tell people the reason I'm growing my hair long is for spiritual reasons, they never argue with me and try to get me to cut it. If I think they can be trusted with more detail, I will say that I have something specific that I have been praying about for a long time and growing my hair long is a kind of demonstration that I don't intend to give up on this particular prayer request until I get an answer. So far, that has worked really well to get people to keep their ideas about my hair to themselves.

[desertgirl]

That's frustrating Kimberly! It sounds like this particular acquaintance really likes the act of cutting hair...

I have a sister who has repeatedly grown her hair to bsl and then chopped it off to give to Locks of Love. Since I started growing my hair out, that has been the question my family has asked me. I think when they see me at thanksgiving that's the question I'm going to hear the most... I might just have to wear it up all weekend!

btw I loved when my hair reached the top of my tank top. It was a great feeling! woohoo! And your hair looks beautiful and healthy

[kschr2004]

Desertgirl,

Thanks! It's not as healthy as I would like it to be, since some of it still has highlights that have been covered up with color. But I try not to do too much heat styling and I use deep conditioner on it pretty often, so that helps.

Yes, it did strike me that he really likes the act of cutting hair. Which is funny, because he was also saying he was a supporter of really long hair, and that he rarely advised women to go really short with their styles. That, I think, is a bit of a contradiction given the way that he was talking.

Oh, well - at least ranting on here helped me calm down. :-) Thanks, everyone!