I am new & frustrated with my hair can anyone help?

[Jamie Lynn 40]

Hello Everyone-
I was just wondering what the measurements are for SMT ? For some reason I can't locate it. Do you use this as a leave- in treatment or a deep conditioner? I also wondered if I can just use my aloe vera plant or do I have to buy it? My GNC store only carries a small tube of it & it is only 99% aloe vera gel. Sorry to ask so many questions but I really want to do this right.:-)
Jamie

[Nightshade]

Jamie Lynn, if it'll help give you some more information, you could always check out the damaged hair article in my siggy. There's a bit of info in there, and links to a lot of helpful articles and treatments

[Jamie Lynn 40]

Thanks Nightshade!:-)

[Teazel]

Teazel-
Thank you so much for the advice. It really makes sense. And now that I think about it, yes, I do sometimes fiddle with parts of my hair. I am planning on wearing it up a lot from now on.
By the way, I love your hair color. Is it natural or do you color it? So I am going to take your advice & stay away from the scissors, keep some kind of cone free leave-in treatment for my ends ( I have coconut oil, jojoba oil, almond oil, giovanni leave-in, & wella liquid hair). The rest of them I can no longer use because they all have some kind of cone in them. And hopefully my hair will start growing.
One more question: Do your ends get really thin or frizzy? If so, what do you do about it? My stylist says it is breakage but if that is the case ( it probably is) I have had the same problem for years & I guess it is because of all the cone products I have used. Anyway, thanks again & have a great day.
Jamie

Thank you for the compliment on my hair colour. It's entirely natural: I used to use a temporary dye on it, but quit about 5 years ago when it stopped covering the greys effectively. Since then I have learned to accept, and even enjoy, my silver ("silver" sounds so much better than "grey", don't you think? ).

My hair does taper down to the ends, but it's not frizzy anymore since I learned to keep it moisturised (I don't bother with oils much now, just use a mix of 'cone-free conditioner / honey / aloe vera when I wash it, and put it in a damp bun for a while when it starts to feel a bit crunchy). I think most people with long hair will have split ends to some extent. Remember, it's in your stylist's interests to keep you coming back for trims, not yours. I just snip my split ends off one-by-one when I notice them, if I have time and sharp scissors handy.

[ChatoyantLocks]

This is the way I trim split ends: I take a small section of hair and twist it in one direction until the twist is tight and the ends poke out from the sides. Then I take a small, sharp scissors and cut off each split end one hair at a time, trying to take off as little past the split as possible. (I think this is called dusting the ends, but someone correct me if I'm wrong.)

I must correct myself. According to this article:

http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/...e&articleid=79

what I am doing is not called dusting the ends. It is called Search & Destroy (S&D). Both methods are described in the article.

[Soniasonia]

Instead of using chemical shampoos use natural ones. My mom uses one called Chinese herbal by Lamas beauty thats amazing, I use it everytime I spend the night.

[Jamie Lynn 40]

ChatoyantLocks-
Thanks for the article. I did a little S&D today on only one side of my hair. I don't think it is real uneven though ( maybe a little). Also, I have been putting vatika coconut oil in it after I rinse it or wash it. I hope this helps get it in better shape. Thanks again.
Jamie

[Jamie Lynn 40]

Soniasonia-
Thanks for the info. I bought some VO5 ( no cone ) shampoo to help moisturize my hair the other night. I also tried the conditioner, honey, & aloe vera & left it on for almost 3 hours.It made my hair pretty soft but I think I put to much conditioner in the mixture.
Jamie

[Jemoiselle]

On the subject of trims, let me tell you! I've been in a few movies as a character extra
and on the set of Oceans 13 I had a conversation with the most amazing hairstylist I've ever met. She put it really simple for me: "If you want to grow good looking long hair, you have to cut it regularly to stop it from breaking. But nobody wants to cut. Drives me crazy!" Since I had the priviledge of meeting with her on the set, I started getting what they call twist cuts
every 4 weeks at her advice. They section my hair, twist each section and trim the splits from end to scalp. Since then my hair has been growing at a rate I've never seen before, and it is three inches from my dream length of 37 inches! Yay! Funny and ironic as it may seem, I can be seen in the movie when the students decide to try to take the Riviera Casino by themselves, in the frame right after you see them outside at night about to enter and a woman in a wedding dress walks by. The go inside, sit down at a table, a blonde walks by in a hot pink dress and walk opposite of her. I play a cocktail waitress in a blue shirt and very very short black shorts, my hair is the most noticable thing about me in the shot! Hehe. You see me walk away, and my long brown hair gives me away. It is alot longer now, as that was shot over a year and a half ago. Anyways, that's just a little movie insider knowledge that I'll pass on to my fine friends of LHC!

Best wishes, I'll be thinking long for ya!
Jemoiselle

[LaurelSpring]

I was in the same boat for years. Its the trims. I was doing the same thing you did. I went to the salon every 3 months and she would cut off 1/2- 1 inch and I couldnt understand why it wasnt getting longer. If your hair is only growing 1/2 inch a month then on that third month you are only left with 1/2 inch growth after you get it trimmed and that would be if the stylist were precise which usually doesnt happen. So you end up always staying the same. That is happening to me now again when I thought I knew better. My new stylist knows I am growing my hair and I told her only dustings but the last two times I went she took more than I wanted each time and set me back a good bit. I just decided I have to stay away from the salon if I want any growth. They mean well but cant seem to take a very small amount. So from now on its self dusting for me. We'll see if the plan changes when I get to whatever is my goal but for growth its best to do self dustings for me anyway. I am also over 40 and shooting for waist.